She fled into the forest, cold blood in her veins,
Her bare feet racing toward what she sought
Her gown drenched in cruel, freezing rain
And behind her ribs, for air her lungs fought.

The night, dark and stormy, swallowed her whole
The princess, the heir to power and might
Threw down her crown, she'd now sold her soul
Her time had come to join the true fight.

Her softened hands now hard as stone
And limbs strong as great trees'
Were ready to unleash fury on others' bones
Who threatened any who were free.

Like mud, her hair fell down her back
Her once ***** spine became flexed and strong
Fleeing feet flew over roots and cracks
And from her curled lips arose a song.

"Fight I can, and fight I will,
For I've waited for too long.
My feet refuse to remain still.
The princess is dead and gone."

i pour myself another flask
tilt my head to the heavens and choke it down
as if to say 'that one's for you mom'
the gulps of jack honey that kiss my stomach
become a bitter reminder of the things that i relinquish in sobriety
they ask me about my coping skills and lately
i nit pick, mock, and overanalyze
see, i am much more bitter than the poison i swallow
yet it will never occur to anyone that i have a void in my heart the size of kansas
i take another swig, feel the whiskey warm my cheek, and
close my eyes to imagine my mother's hands cupping my face
as if to subtlety remind me that i'll be alright
but that never corresponds to the way that i've felt since that night
i stand in front of the mirror bearing a shocking resemblance of her
my eyes tilt down a little and my lips are thin, just as hers were

I promise you I'm not a love poet, but if I were...
I'd write about how I want to massage your back with notes
so your body can sing songs your lips don't even know the words to.

I am so sick of being that girl
The one who sits awkwardly
Tries not to show too much on my face
But here I am
I watch all around as people
Stare
Judge each other
And it isn’t even me that I am tearing the roots out of my faith in humanity over

I watch
And I listen
And all I perceive is laughter
“Oh my gosh that was totes hilarious”
No.
It wasn’t.
Those people you laugh at…
People of Wal-Mart
That crazy chick
The person at the end of all of your jokes
Harmless as they seem
Those people are people too
They have people who love them
Loved ones losing them to the horrors of the person that you force them to see in the mirror each day
Each breath
Rigid and Choked
Trying to be the person on the inside
“Only inner beauty matters…”

Then why won’t you let them be more than
The punch line.

I know
It’s harmless
Everyone laughs
It’s funny

And everybody laughing
And joking
And smiling
As they look past your soul
Just searching for a witty response
Instead of a human being

It isn’t harmless.


If I fall
And I can’t even breathe
I can’t even tell who I am
And no one is around to hear my cries for help
No one hears…

Do I still exist?

People stop wanting to exist when they feel like their life doesn’t exist.
I’ve been there before

So

Just stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Just stop.
Think for a second.

What if that was you?
What if it was your best friend?
Your everything?
And their existence is laughed off.

Until it shrivels and dies.
No more growth.
Not ever.

We are walking uphill through a snowstorm of meaningless arrows
Poison soaking the tips
And I can’t fight them forever.
So please.
Somebody help.

And even though you may finally hear my cries
And cry with me
You keep on shooting
Not even thinking
Because it is only natural now.

Please.
Think.
Stop.
Think.
Let me go.
Let everyone try to figure out who they are
What they want to be
Without pushing waves of stereotypes
And laughing at their dreams
Scoffing their entire existence away

Your lips look so soft,
and your voice; like velvet, so sweet.
You make me feel so warm
from my head to my feet.

I love the way you look at me -
your eyes blue like the sky.
I wonder what you're seeing
as you look right into mine.

I wish you'd put your thoughts into words,
wish you'd whisper them into my ear.
With that smooth voice you have
you don't know how I long to hear
you saying what you think of me.
Tell me exactly what you think -
please, stop leaving me guessing..
Analyzing every move you make, even the way you blink.

I know, I'm a hopeless romantic.
Daydreaming of you constantly,
wishing you'd man up.
Just guts up and ask me!

Maybe I'm rushing things,
but how can I not?
You got my heart racing
and now I can't make it stop..

All I want is you and your heart,
I'll do anything to get it.
I know you want mine too,
even though you already stole it.

The.first time I laid eyes on you,
you took my breath away.
I know that you're a gift from God
and I hope His plan is for you to stay.

You make me feel like a queen,
a beautiful, delicate princess.
I'm still trying to see
what I'm supposed to make of this.

Never have I felt so loved,
except by God Himself -
you make me feel so wanted,
you've helped me see myself.

Sweet boy, look what you've done;
you melted my heart, set it free.
Your beautiful heart for God
has helped to remold me.

And your beauty on it's own,
it lit a raging fire..
I don't think you know
about this passionate desire.

I just want to hold you,
make you the happiest man alive.
Darling I can't explain
how truly hard I strive.

I strive to let the "me" in me shine,
to be the masterpiece God planned.
I want to be perfect for Him so that maybe,
just maybe, He'll have you be my perfect man.

When I tell you
“I don’t know”
it’s because my thoughts will not stop racing
and the fog in my head will not recede.

All I really know is I want you now
Even if I shouldn’t
And I’m not good at taking things
One day at a time.

I hate the sound of her name on your lips.

It is sandpaper to my skin
It is weary and bloodshot eyes
It is water clogging my ears
It is the weight I bear on my back

It is the lump in my throat of your name - of which I can no longer say.

I use a flashlight
Shine it
Shed light
On what?
On me?
I'm not creative
I don't deliver any talents worth mentioning
Keep that spotlight off of me

My words don't shine bright
Stand out
Its the same thing over and over
Repeat after me
I am not creative
My words don't shine bright
Stand out
Its the same thing over and over

I'm like that annoying cd that skips repeatedly
The same phrase, the same verse

I can't mold something new out of already hardened clay
I can't dream up beautiful rhyming words
I can't make a trending poem
Not one that paints a gorgeous portrait in the mind of its readers

We can talk about roses all day long if you want
Or tree's and sunshine
And blue sky's!!
Oh and rainbows and butterflys
If that's what makes a poem worth reading
We can talk about love
And hearts
We can hold hands and blows kisses
Peace and harmony

Or we could talk about the real stuff
The Shadows
The dark stuff
Teardrops
The shattered mirrors
All of our fears
The things that bring about nightmares
The truth
The ugliness
The misery
The dark and twisted stuff
They say the mentally disturbed are the most creative

Its up to you
Dear poet
Person sitting there at the steering wheel
Staring at the road ahead
Put the car in drive
Steer it in the right direction
Or is there a right direction?

Its all just space
Blank space
The pen just sits there in your hand
Waiting for an idea to take shape
Hope its going to be worth the struggle
The self loathing
Worth picking and prodding at your ego
Telling you, you **** at writing
So why bother right?

It's more than just a poem
Its more then just a page in your story
A direction in your life
A struggle
A meaning
A life
Its your life

It only happens when I look at you
When my new stones turn an icy hue
A cold chill of last November
Frozen deeper than I remember
With a steep wall to scale
It takes a moment to fail
But it only happens when I look at you
Again I hear my heart break
And I learn what's at stake
In a journey to heal --
Only this wound to feel
And that only happens when I look at you.