Like a matchstick
Under pressure and friction
I light up
Burn

Heat surges through
my body
and then after glowing for awhile
it is extinguished

*whoosh

I've set the bar too high
for myself,
now I'm struggling to reach it

Give your best to
everyone

Be nice to
everyone

Notice and care for
everything

Be there
24/7

Have good grades

Be more outspoken

Be independent

Do well musically

Do well artistically

Be a good daughter
Be an obedient granddaughter
Be a loving sister

Be *sane

Dear velohomme,

I know you probably hate me for doing all this
for forcing you and everything
I know why you used that quote
you don't want to be seen as a 'freak'
But you aren't my dear,
you are my friend, my very best friend
and I know you are scared how everyone might view you
and honestly you are perfectly normal and everything
aside from those 3 brothers
but you must understand that they deprive you of sleep
you dearly need
those tears that fall. you are scared. You have written.

You are amazing in every way
but if there is something wrong
and you need help
I hope you reach out your hand to receive it

There is nothing wrong with a little help
I honestly don't mind being the bad guy
I mean, you can hate me
want to **** me
slap me
throw something at me

but if at the end of the day
everything falls into place
and you get better
though you may not agree.

It would be worth it
I wish I could tell you there is nothing wrong
but maybe sometimes there is
and we all need a little fixing
maybe its just society
I would love to agree that there is nothing wrong
but maybe there is
neither of us wants to admit it

by this time you are probably bursting
with anger and hurt
and maybe other emotions

I just want to let you know
that even if you won't talk to me anymore
even if you don't want to see me
I don't regret it.
I just don't want to keep closing my eyes
thinking its all okay
My mind has been clouded.

Well just to comfort you
I won't be doing anything or telling anybody soon
Just God.
Because its him who does the magic right?
He's the one with the fairy dust.

I'll leave it all up to him
It's not up to me, or you or anyone
it's up to him.

And tonight,
I really hope he answers my prayers
because wishing on 11 11 is *******
wishing on stars and believing about stardust magic
is *******

honestly,
I've been neglecting him a bit
and I'm ashamed and sorry
But I trust that he'll save you lil' sis

He'll be by your side whenever you fall
in the dead of night
whenever you call and please don't fight
these hands that are holding you.

God's hands are holding you

It's treacherous to believe that a person is more than a person
I never really understood this line
till now

It really is treacherous
misleading
feeds your thoughts

that person loses her identity
she just becomes an idea.
and you my dear believe in that idea of her
so strongly you forget who she is.

don't
Because one day reality would come along
and turn the switch on to bring gravity back
leaving you waking up on the concrete floor
concussed and crying
bleeding and dying
**cheated of feeling

How naive of I to think
everything would be fine

at least I had today

I'm still not sure of
what is happening all around me
The tables turn too fast

I don't know what you said
I don't know what you did
I don't know what you see
I don't know what happened

All I know is that things change
                                                                         too fast
Things keep happening
Things that keep slipping out of my

         *small fragile hands

It's funny how I wake up
Feeling nothing of what I'd felt before
It's like a different person
I'm sorry

If I told you
In that moment of embrace

I was so close to breaking down
I teared

Would you believe me

How naive of I to think
everything would be fine

at least I had today

I'm still not sure of
what is happening all around me
The tables turn too fast

I don't know what you said
I don't know what you did
I don't know what you see
I don't know what happened

All I know is that things change
                                                                         too fast
Things keep happening
Things that keep slipping out of my

         *small fragile hands

There goes
I relapsed
again

How insensitive of me

Something troubles me
every time
I re-read
old and new
poems

Who exactly
is
that
*you

I never cried
No matter how sad
The movie was

I never cried
No matter how sad
The book was

So why do I cry
At words
Spoken from human mouth?

Why do I cry
At words
Typed out by familiar hands?

Could someone tell me
Why

Everyone is cranky
Everyone is breaking
But everyone is blaming
The
Wrong
Person

Can't you see
The ticking timebomb
Wasn't her
It's
*Me