There's a
Ghost
Behind those eyes

There's a
Fish
Behind that barely-there smile

There's a
Catch
Behind that "Yeah"

And the only thing
You can do is
Know

A flame swindled the new breath of acceptance, simple love should have rejoiced, replaced instead by shaken faith..
Ocean waves a life should be wash away the pain deep in our soul,
I stand clear in view as you stand and walk just as we do,
Look around you and see through the blankets we use to cover our abysmal pain,
We are the same you and I, loneliness tends to follow every soul.
Walked, breathe, spoken at strangers
Only to find more loneliness in my heart,
A hand is all I need, comfort my heart
I am afraid of each day, the Morrow brings another lonely day.
My lips hard to part a single word I cannot speak as my hearing is lost,
Deafness is my part a simple symphonic word dear is what I desire.
Gestures are all I've known waves head nods, I watch each day afraid to be a part of your world. My fear is simple yet complicated

You are perfect
Just the way you are.
There is no better version of yourself.
You are an eternally burning star.

You have absolute worth.
You are wonderfully created.
Your value was established as a constant
When you were created.
It never changes. You are never any less valuable.

No matter what you've done.
No matter what you haven't done.
No matter how guilty you feel.
No matter what your parents told you.
No matter what your friends told you.
No matter how you feel right now.

You Are Perfect.
You are beautiful. You are infinite.

You deserve every good thing that has
ever happened to you.
You deserve every good thing that
will happen to you.
You deserve a perfect reality.

Smile at reality,
and reality will smile back at you.

Lose yourself in the rapture
  of living completely in this moment.

You are loved and you are Love.

Some say it is a naive notion to believe
that love can change the world.

Maybe you think love can't change everything,
  but it can change this moment.
And at the moment... that is everything.

Why can't we just read?
I love to read,
we all do,
somewhere inside.
I love the way the words flow,
I love how quickly it transports me
to vivid new worlds.
I like the feeling of fragile paper
and the smell of a dusty,
long forgotten book.
Pages of excitement bound together,
you think it could never lose its magic,
but you'd be wrong.

You go to school
and the magic is lost.
These light words that mean so much
are weighted down and draped in logic,
the book becomes dull and painful.

I don't care if the colour of the curtains
is a metaphor for the author's struggle with homosexuality,
I don't care to take this painted porcelain
and smash it into bits,
entirely digested,
sorted into categories,
and picked into nothing.
I do not wish to burn away
the heart and soul
to leave nothing but the bones.
I read to escape,
to love,
to learn,
to experience,
I read to forget where I really am.

I do not wish
for the thought of this fantasy tale,
to be flogged over the head repeatedly
with reality.
I wish to forget,
read for pleasure,
read for interest,
read for love,
read because I want to,
read to fully appreciate
the well-thought out story
by a person long gone.

Is that too much to ask for?

What kind of society do we live in that makes people feel this way?

I told myself I would never succumb,
I pace back and forth with tears streaming down my face
telling myself again and again
"I'm strong I'm strong"

I look in the mirror
and I beg to see something beautiful.
I beg to find pretty,
but I have yet to see it.
"You're beautiful You're beautiful"
I tell myself again and again
But I never believe it.

I collapse to the ground, sobbing
because I've failed.
six water bottles
and feeling sick
as that hopeless feeling takes over me.

I look in the mirror
and beg for a sign that I'm okay
something to tell me I don't have to do this.

But there I end up,
crippled over the toilet
vomiting my insecurities.

What else can you do.
You starve yourself but nothing changes,
You exercise none stop
but you stay the same.

You've thrown away the food in the house
to keep the bare, healthy minimum.

Nothing changes.
Nothing but shivers
and a voice
that knows you'll do anything for a touch;
Maybe if I'm skinny,
I won't be alone.
Maybe,
Someone will find me pretty enough to ask if I'm okay.
I wouldn't have to sit here sobbing
feeling hopeless.

But nothing changes.
Nothing changes and I can't stop the tears.
Looking into that horrific mirror,
Looking back at that red,
pudgy,
unpleasant face
mocking me.

A broken body

with a  broken mind

what else can I do,

when nothing changes?

There's a girl who laughs the color of the full moon
She crinkles her eyes as a smile spreads over her face
Stretching like leather on an canvas

There's a girl who cries the color of an unripe blackberry
She watches sad movies and chokes back tears
Letting the salt water tell her to breathe

There's a girl who dreams the color of old lace
She flips through an old photo album
And imagines her future through the fading memories of the past

There's a girl who sings the color of your favorite t-shirt
She lets her voice be drowned out by the radio
The wind whipping through her hair on a Sunday afternoon

Then there is a girl who is nothing

And I don't know which one matters more