It was the first blossoms of  May
I think
A time of perfumes and fragrances
That dripped promises like honey.
No matter my love,
that some would fade
like the cherry blossoms

My heart was filled back then with a
room full of tomorrows.
Our children were asleep in their beds
the youngest as new as the lilacs.
And we sat closely together

Sharing the spring morn with a coffee ***.
I still remember,
The morning sunlight caught the burnished
shine of your beautiful hair.
I thought how good it would feel
Cascading onto my bare chest.

I looked at you at that tender moment.
Not as my wife
or the mother of my children.
But as the woman I could not
get enough of when we first met.

I know we were always working
back then
always tired from disturbed sleep.
Never enough money
to go around.

But even now after
a long lifetime together.
If you were to ask me
were you happy
back then my love,
I would answer
yes my love
so happy
so very happy.

In the darkest hours of the night
I sit at my piano.
sleep is now for another time.
Inside of me
I am lonely in a way
that no closeness can mend.

I play chopin's nocturne.
Just like I used to play it for you.
before I lost you.
Touching the keys as softly
as you once touched my skin.

Through the open window
My nocturne joins the echoes
of the woodlands.
The milk toast pools of moonlight
gather silvered  in our pathway.

The melody is gentle and  sweet now
And pouring melancholy
Into my veins.

All I can feel is you.
I know that in that illuminated
World that knows no pain or sadness
You have your hand pressed against
A distant window,
And my music is playing in your heart

I need to write you a love poem.
No Maytime and flowers.
No June and moon.
But smoldering with passion
And heated desires
so much so
It will slow down time itself
to a motionless crawl
dragging out
the seconds into hours
Until you return to my bed.

Filling your thoughts with
Desire and lust.
As dangerous
as the surging rapids
of the mountain rivers
after the winter snow melts.

So intense
it burns away propriety
And we will feast
on its wild ancient flavors.

So encapsulating
upon reading its words.
You will unfasten your hair
as you drop everything else
and run to me.

And when we meet
No words
No words
No words
Let's not waste
our breath on words.

I know exactly
when I fell  in love with him
It was at my sisters engagement party
I was weeping
I suppose I was jealous of my sister.
She had all that I did not.
No one was in sight
no one cares for me
well not beyond ******* me,
not for me, really

The fiancees best friend was a ****
he put the moves on me.
Another anonymous ****,
I thought.
I like your smell
are you wearing, my sin.
How ******* cheesy.

No, I hate perfume, I said,
I know you You Have a reputation
you would **** anything in a skirt.
I still like your smell he said.

And I wanted  to believe it
I guess I was lonely
I slept with him.
******* him,
it was sweet.

A couple of months later
I was pregnant, in the club
Up the spout,
Blasted into matterity
by a guided muscle.

But he just said, Oh ****
and asked  to marry me.
I said are you crazy
He  said
yes i'm crazy about you.

At the wedding he sang
A love song to me in Spanish
He learned ******* Spanish,
He had a horrible voice.
But it was the most beautiful thing
I have ever heard
so ******* beautiful.

When our daughter was born
he was the doting father.
He worshipped her
but he made me
feel like never before.
I loved him..
That womanizing *******
That treated me like gold.
He had stolen my heart.

Six years later
we have three kids now
I think he is probably
the best father
that ever was

But to me
He is the light,
that causes
my life to shine.

Tenderness flows from him to me
So much softness no one can see
His kiss is like eternity
As content as anyone can be

The silence quietly awaits for me
In a turgid wild unwelcome sea
But now his tenderness flows for me
Inside my soul where none can see

The storms they break the evensong hours
In a deluge of unwelcome showers
His tenderness flows from him to me
So much softness no one can see

If you go away, as I know you will.
Leave on a summer day, when the world  is still
And the sun is warm, and the flowers shine
And the world is sweet, like summer wine.

If you go away as I know you will.
Leave when the nightbird's song
is loud and shrill
And there's no chance of rain
in an azure sky.
And the summer breeze
Whispers goodbye.

If you go away as I know you will.
And my. futures filled, with only time to ****
It will be kinder losing you, on such an afternoon
When the earth is sweet,
and the flowers bloom.

If you go away.........
If you go away.............
If you go away................

Your eyes are as green
as the emerald forest.
Smiling dreams of red firelight
in a burning autumn sky.
the trees resonate
the ancient mantras of time past
Cooling winds fed by
the milky moonlight
foretell the seasons change.

Golden leaves floating
in the thin air drifting like ghost .
The reflecting golden wavelets
on the pond
See a rising mist
of summers last  breath over them.

And the rush of this autumn beauty
stirs my heart
like a mother's touch