Its quite a nuisance when I feel like I tryed   But trying was never good enough I could have have up but my iron will will continue this fight till the end

So when you are called traitor what did I do I gave my reason and my brutally honesty I needed to find out of this feeling I had in me if it was a phase it was not it is imprinted in me Like that horrid image I saw that drove me over the edge I remember it like it was yesterday

My life has been something of a up and down war to find that one  single thing in this world I needed a person in my life that I tend to have a feeling of will I ever be the same again? I will answer that when I return  I will be ready for all arms open and all opposition and I be ready to end it all

you see dont trust me because i dont care  the fact is you dont know what know

I know you have someone else well he can have you because as far as i am concerned i moved on

and i got over it because i am the better  man  and i will prove it because i am moving on   and by the way  

im over the false confidence you gave me you acted like you gave a **** then you throw it to the ground for some piece of  Sh*T    
i am done and i am over it

every time i see that beautiful smile of yours my heart erupts like a volcano

No matter how hard it is for me in my life i am glad you show concern for me

that smile i see it i realize i am looking at the girl of my dreams

i see something i care about you see friends  Lovers  i always be here that smile makes me feel like  that i am someone not some thing to help as a coping mechanism

Your smile is what drives me to get up every day the chance to talk to you makes happy

falling down i fell down a chasm hit the ground felt like a thousand needles impaling my heart

falling down i realized why have i always looked for the next best thing i realized

something the thing i always wanted has always been in my life a friend told me a piece

of my own advice its never out there its always under your nose **** she was right

to see the answer you got to hit rock bottom multiple times again and again again

and again and again and again because i see it now i don't need someone who

discards me when they are to stubborn or just don't care  i know what i need no one

else  can stop this feeling like a wild fire of emotions i feel like i am a lowly peasant

basking at a window with all their dreams right there in front of them  just not being

able to grab it.   falling down took me to realize the truth i love being there i love every second of basking in happiness instead of sadness and regret do i regret not fessing up absolutely but i really honestly love every second of this  i am so done being a lone wolf  my heart needs is a pack of two  and i wait every single day till the one i am loved back

For two weeks i am have not thrown hope away for what a miserable life well guess what

The fact that i walk alone against a entire army to prevent me from   any and every chance i have

well for two weeks i been thinking why quit when you can say you know what take your restrictions , your replacements , your turncoats   and have them feel how i feel right now you see it does not matter  because UP THERE  i am not what is considered IT you see IT is  just a chosen piece of garbage who does not work for anything his life   so guess what  think about this how would you feel if i ruined YOUR Moment how would it feel if you were in MY shoes  huh not good because  i do not care if this ruins everything i worked for  because what i am gonna do is gonna be remembered as a mixed reaction some people will say good for you and some people will say why Jordan why  well right now they can know why because you see being the nice guy for years i been told it gets me no where you i have balanced it and now this side of me will do WHATEVER IT TAKES so  your gonna have to **** me to stop this the headline reads that i get my dreams and the pieces to fix my broken soul leaving  to the end of this  dark gloomy story the enemy gets whats coming to him and the hero gets the girl

if you were here i would be proud
my true feelings you dont know the shock everytime we talk
if you were here i would know true feelings from the heart
hope you take it and accept me  
if you were here a earthquake would be inside my chest

Jordan Stenberg ''TM

The times we had.

"The times i turned your frowns upside down.

Ad Times passed i realized that my efforts was something i was proud of.

I quit when there was no chance if you want anything just forget our past and cometh with your reasoning.

and i forgive my inner wrongs you should to.

"Times pass all humans change for the better or the worse .

Theres two things i want my dream  and a good life but can you have both.

considering my life is rigid like the rocks on a cliff jagged a person above it.

I been through a lot  parental issues seeing loved ones taken over by a demon i can name it all.

you see my strength my drive my will to move on in life could lead me places or be stuck in the bitterness in my heart.

i Climb the ladder and take a  contract to achieve my dream they  may call me a yardtard but you see theres something you see  misery loves  company.

i was happy i thought she loved me but she liked someone else it tears me to pieces knowing it.
but far as i am concerned he does anything to hurt her i will ******* tear his heart out
you know what that wont stop me that motivate me to try harder
i may be in tears and destroyed but i am coming for that *******  and believe me  its a fight
you see i been smashed the last time you see i am coming and there one word there is one phrase run why you still can

You all my heart wants

I think of you like crazy i see the rain its beauty its nothing compared to you

your my Everything i will return one day

i dream of returning to see you to bring light to this dark soul

I realized that your my everything  i need nothing else i wait years forever  for you to see the way i do

Do you know what is like to be haunted? 

Every time I see a another pretty face it does not Change I just see the one that got away from me 

This image. Is a haunting image. That makes you realize that you can't fight your emotion 

This reoccurrence has a pattern  once you seen it turns me into a world I missed. 

You know you missed something when reminded of it 

I am not afraid it has shown  who really is that dream you feel every single night 

A reoccurence of a image is  imprinted into my heart and will always be patient for that chance that one can dream about

so i get the one taken from like that now i have no choice

So  what fine **** that i just walk alone   **** it

You see its bad enough that  my life ***** as it is  but why force somebody change everything for their own personal gain

I wont leave you  **** it you wanna take me put me in a casket and dead thats the only way i will leave

i fought for that one moment then soon as you lose it you fall down a step

The reason may be good or really ******  but guess what life *****

i fight i put myself on the line hell i dont understand i was angry i did the wrong thing

well we all make mistakes  i live through it  like i always do well your loss

Two years ago he was brought  into this world filled with the everlasting battle of light and darkness.
the smiles over the years he gave me  brought me up from the rock and the hard place.
the darkness fell for a moment he shows his love for me as he says my jojo.
today he turns two i want to make it a great day to my best little brother  i ever had

as i think of her my chest pounds  at me like punch to the face.
there's one thing that i hear these things about her one more time that are false.
i will crack some heads to make sure they dont break her down.
i am willing to have scale ladders jump off  rooftops  heck even  have to climb a mountain the size of everest for her.   she is everything i want i may never be the one who be in the heart but i will be there as support

i hear a  a urge to strike when my time is needed it seems its about to be my time maybe i hope i fail

I struck out so many times where you got to take what you want not patiently wait like a solider guarding the lines of Korea

Strike first  my friends say i must find a way to have her some way some how it must happen

I do not care if i like you or not please sometimes you should not talk   because you got it easy

you see my life is rough i really fallen for someone and i rather not hear about  how someone else is taking her

you see a dance is a dance so what you see i will not ruin someone else because my life is ******

love you see i am glad that you care for my sanity but at the same time the one thing that is keeping me borderline  loose cannon crazy   is my LOVE and i will not quit i will not back down from anyone
because just stay out of it this does not concern you see i be here and i always be here so people please Get the F out

all i  have that is between you and i at this point is one dance  

One dance that i  never forget One Dance i  have to prove how much you  mean  to  me

That One dance  is all i GOT  to look for  now because   my  life is changing  my family might be moving

And i be left here to stay in the home that the past years i been in

This one dance may either break my soul to a even worse state or it will mend it hopefully

months years i known you even though we rarely talk in a life time i know you always be there and i be there if needed  no matter what
I remember back in the days we were all growing up on who we were you remained kind unlike others   you never changed  never have  its crazy its been three years since i last seen you   maybe  i see you in the future months years friends for life

my thoughts return attempted to drive me crazy
you may not talk to me as much you see i am here for you no matter what you do
you see   no one can change my feelings for you are real and heck you can pick the wrong guy thats cool
because after a while  you may regret  it because i refused to be stopped by him or anyone else   because until i find a way into your heart consider it to this man a war that he cant win because  if he knew that i am the most patient and most relentless man when i want someone to be safe from a big fat mistake like HIM  i know who it is and trust me when i tell you  i may be ignored i may be not what you consider the type of guy but let me tell you something i am nice until you break my heart      into pieces and talk to me like i can detect something  its not funny this wont happen again  and tell him  i got a a phrase run while you can because i do whatever it takes to prove that i should be THAT GUY

as i walk with a friend who  i am glad to know and will miss we talk about all things and he gives my advice on my situation  i think  of Us and why shes been so strange i know i would love to be there its  noticeable that she is bothered and needs left alone   i understand i been there  but as i talk and watch the moon light glimmer it tells me she needs you she needs you swoop out of no where and fix her  because she changed   and i  need to fix it and myself

oh dear  my heart is like freaking  rubics cube always moving and changing and being difficult

Loneliness is one horrific thing i deal with but a feeling that i wish would go away is another

Trying not to be near anything involving that one horrid emotion the more i hide the harder it fights

I get it  trying is everything  yeah dreams do wonder really  does  my dark soul have some light in me in still?

I walk in the street staring at the sky and look for the answer who is the one for me?

Where is my answer I don"t need a god to find it i  may have found it

I try to wait for my shot i been waiting for a long  6 years  i found something good but i will not make

that mistake.... again