And here's my elegy, elegantly written,
Barely fitting, in these pages,
I'm sitting on my hopes,
and dwelling on my notes,
My back's against the ropes,
my thoughts are bursting out of me,
half cowardly,
I tremble as I move,
I'm shaking in my boots,
Replaying in my head,
feels like forever losing you,
Stuck in a place like a hamster in a wheel,
Until sick is all I feel,
Avoid thinking just to deal,
I keep on spiraling til I'm getting nowhere quick like that hamster and its steel,
Caged within these thoughts,
My prison is my cross,
The sickness is the cure,
No wonder I feel lost.

This is the longest winter,
time slowed to a crawl,
I guess it is ironic, you passed away in early fall.

We throw words around like rice on wedding days,
Without realizing we don't really mean what we say.
Okay, I mean, tell me, what the hell's a love/hate relation??
You can't love someone AND hate them,
That's a twisted perception,
A misinterpretation, of what these words both mean,
You can't choose to use these at your leisure, to fit in your scheme.
That's not the way it works,
Look at the true definition,
And you'll see that these are opposites,
two different positions.
These both get thrown about, without real caution or thought.
This world could use less hate,
but is in need of more love.

Time heals all, a sad misconception.
Considering I always see your face in reflections.
It's never easy, when I see your face mixed with mine.
It's like the mirror constantly reminds
me of a time,
When I could smile more with ease,
No sign of a struggle,
Nowadays, I do it just to please,
what a bother.
And it's exhausting, so when I really stop and I think.
All I can bring myself to do is bleed out in ink.

Your face is etched in my mind,
And I hold it so dear.
So much so, that no photo of you is more clear.
Because a photo is still,
But in my mind, you're alive
So if I'm ever feeling ill,
I think of you to survive.
But the ugly truth is that you'll forever sleep.
But part of you is with me in the necklace I keep.
Cuz in it are the ashes of a beautiful soul,
So I can't help it when I think of you now and weep.
And if this poem's too deep,
I give no sorry or plea,
Cuz, see, maybe then you'll get a glimpse of life now for me.

I kept two of your caps,
Out of sadness, perhaps,
Whenever I try them on,
a rain falls down on my lap.

One hat you wore last when,
you blew the candles of the cake,
Of your very last birthday, the thought alone makes me break.
But the other is much worse,
I swear I write this while crying,
Because the other hat,
is the same one that you died in.

My hand has never felt this heavy.
I can barely hold the pen up.
Even as I write this, i don't know where it will end up.
But I fear it won't be good enough.
No matter what I write down.
Nothing could rightly express these thoughts, feelings, and my heart sounds,
Sad and broken, daily hurting,
Haunted nightly by these demons.
I've wasted countless hours with hypothetical ******* reasons,
And nothing seems to make sense.
And nothing seems to matter.
Nothing seems to get better,
No 'happy ever afters'.
Life is much more cruel.
The pain's almost too much.
If a heart gets broken, time will heal it,
There's no safe crutch.

No words could truly ever express,
or pay respects
but I swear I'll always try my best
To keep you in my memories.
Which is ironic, since you died in an infiniti.
I'll keep you in my heart and soul and hope this brings tranquility.

I made myself a promise,
When this mortal met this goddess,
I swore that I would always love her and be honest.

And she brings out the best in me,
Loves me ever pleasantly,
Taking in the good, and all the bad and all the rest of me.

And that's when it hit me,
how could I ever leave her?
When this goddess met this mortal,
she said she loved him, he believed her.

Together, it'll be okay,
When life gets us down, I know it sounds cliche, but
What can I say?.. it's true.
All we need for life, is me and you
..well, I guess money wouldn't hurt.

It's been a while, I had to recharge my batteries,
Get up off my battered knees,
And give in to my better needs.
The ones that I could not control,
nor did I really wanna,
To think I'd find someone to finally start my 'once upon a'.

It's cheesy. I know so.
But pleasing, and oh so,
Amazing, can't contain this love that I have for her whole soul.
She's the only thing that matters.
Let us start the chapter,
That will lead us both together to the happy ever after.

You bring life to my words,
And meaning to my life.
When I think of us, I can't help but feel so right.
I have never felt like this,
This feeling's kind of strange,
But I welcome it with open arms,
And hope it doesn't change.
This must be what they call love,
What a weird phenomenon.
Like deja vu, like deja vu,
Like glue I'm stuck, the drug I'm on,
With just benefits, zero side effects or repercussions.
The cause of open-ended, never ending deep discussions.
And all I know is this...
This feeling feels like nothing else.
You reside in the same spot where my beating passion dwells.