I hide it from you
The only thing
I've ever hidden
From you
I hide the pain
I swallow it
Because I don't want to hurt you
I hold it in
Keep it to myself
I don't want you to see it
But you peek through the cracks
You see within me
Though not enough to know
I don't want to let you know
And scare you away
You ask what's wrong
That's why I'm writing this
But I'm scared to click save
Because I know you will read it
I'm scared you will see how damaged I am
And leave
I'm so close to losing you already
I can't lose you
I just can't
I love you
That's why I hide it
You can hear it in my voice
And you want to know
So I'll tell you
It's the pain
The painful thought of losing you
I haven't cried in years
Now I cry every night
It feels weird
But I'm willing to do anything
Just to keep you
I don't want you to go
I'll shake his hand
Tell him I respect him
Please baby
Please don't leave me
I'm begging
I'll do anything
I hide the pain for you
I protect you from it
But you want to know
So I'll tell you
My insides burn
They rot
I don't want to lose you
The thought of it
Makes me want to die
I love you
And I love destine
Remember that

death
thats what i want
feel the warmth
of my own blood
leaking out of my own body
knowing i went out
the way i wanted
sounds good
but thats just it
it sounds good
i could go with my wrists
id fell my blood
driping down my hands
i could paint a pice of art
let it happen slow
that sounds good
or my neck
i could choke on my own blood
drown in it
fell it fill my lungs
choking me slowly
but thats what life is right
it just chokes you
up untill that day
you give out
well
thats the day im waiting for
thats the day we all wait for
so should i cut my wrists
paint a beutiful picture
in my own blood
feel myself slowly slip away
or cut my neck
and drown in my own blood
so witch will it be?
i just want to die
but really
nobody gives a ****

I know what it is
All the *******
Pilled  up inside
Cramer in to a bottle
And shoved down my throat
But I did it to myself
I put it in the bottle
I shoved it down my throat
I caused it all
The bottles cracking
But I seal the cracks
Because I don't want to hurt anyone
Some of it leaked through the cracks
I say things
Things I would never say
To my brother
To my sister
To my mother
To my friends and family
I seclude myself from them
I stay away
I lock myself in my room
And I sit there
I could **** myself
But I can't put that guilt on her
Her, the love of my life
The one I might lose
The one I want to keep
The one I can't lose
My insides burn
And my heart
What's left of it
Is falling apart
I'll do anything to keep her
I'll do anything for her
But I've said that
A million times before
I'll let her choose
I can promise her anything
But it's her choice

She's the one
She's my need
She's my want
She's my everything
I love her
I still love her
I always will
She stole my heart
My shattered heart
It's still in her hands
She broke it more
Many times
But she's the one
Samantha Lee Saxon
She's my one true love
The one I need
I can't live with out her
She is my love
For my love is her

I love you
I trust you
And I don't trust anybody
I never thought I would
Trust anybody again
But I trust you
More than ever
I love you
More than anything
I miss you
more than anything
Remember this my love

It was just yesterday
I saw you
I held you
I kissed you
But now I'm away
And the pain is back
The knot in my stomach
The burn in my throat
The ach in my back
I miss you
I want you back
In my arms
You are the only one I love
The only one I need
The only one for me
I miss you
I love you
Remember that

Riding to meet my mom
Driving her home
As I got farther and farther away
I thought
I miss you
I miss her kiss
I miss your hug
I miss you in my arms
I want you back
I miss you
The hole in my stomich is back
The one only you can fill
We had fun
But I want you back
I miss you so much
Now I'm in my bed
I want you here
It's empty
I'm alone
And I want you here
I miss you
I love you

Baby I miss you
I miss you so much
It hurts
When your away
My heart drops
I love you
I miss you
You showed me what love is
And now it's all I feel
I miss you my love
God it hurts
Please
Promise me
you will never leave me

I'm a redneck
Anyone can see that
I don't have street smarts
I have dirt road smarts
Shotguns and beer
Jacked up trucks and mud
Cain pole and and a pond
My baby and me
That's my idea of heaven
I don't want easy
Easy is to boring
Give me duck tape and nails
I can fix anything
I've done stupid things
I've smoked ****
Drank to much
Broke hearts
****** random girls
I regret it
I fought anybody
For no reason
I've stolen cars
But I'm done
I can't change it
Even if I could
The only thing I would do
Is tell them all I'm sorry
But it made me who I am
Even though
I don't like who I am
I'm proud of it

I'm in my bed
All alone
Because your not here
I wish I could hold you
You could fall asleep in my arms
Dream the night away
Or we could stay awake
Pass the time
It's your call
I'm up for both
Or we could do both
Stay up late
Passing the time
Then fall asleep in my arms
I would feel the warmth of your body
Pressing on mine
As we sleep
Dreaming wonderful dreams
And in our slumber
We would know
When we wake up
We will be together
I'd open my eyes to see you there
I'd wake you up
Kiss you
Tell you
good morning beautiful
That would be a perfect night
But only if you were here

"Hey jonah call me"
That's the first text
You ever sent me
I called you
Thinking
Something's wrong
"Is everything ok?"
"Yeah I just wanted to talk"
I think
She called me
Just to talk?
"About?"
"I'm bored"
"Oh sorry I'm at work"
"Aww ok bye"
"Bye"
I got in trouble
With my boss
But I didn't say anything
I worked all day thinking
She called me
Just to talk?
I ended up
Not worrying about it
I still remember the first call
I was asleep
I heard my phone ring
I wake up
It's 11:30
I have to get up at 5:00
I answer it
"Hello?"
"Hey jonah"
"Samantha?"
"Yeah"
I was prepared
To tell who ever it was
I have to get up
At 5:00 bye
But no
I said
"Hey what's up?"
"Nothin can't sleep"
"Oh. Dam that *****"
"Yeah. What you doin"
"Talking to you"
"Besides that"
"Sittin in my bed"
"Oh well I'm tired now"
"Ok good night"
"Night"
I loved you then
I love you now
I was hunting
Sittin in my deer stand
I look at my phone
Your calling me
Anyone else
Id text
In the deer stand
Can't talk
But no
I answer it
"Hey jonah"
I hear you crying
"Hey are you ok?"
"Robert left me"
And I sat there
Listened
Got you to stop crying
Then called him
And talked three way
I was glad you called.
I still remember all of that
I love you
We were best friends before
I always wanted more
That was two years ago
Now it's more
I'm the happiest person ever
That's three months ago
Now I'm about to lose you
I can't lose you
I'll go insane
I love you
I'll do anything
I swear
I'm in so much pain
Pain I don't care about
Because I want you to stay
I throw it aside for you
I still remember
That first text
And that first call
And I always will

It hurts so bad
Those painful thoughts
That you might leave me
They hurt
But I try to withstand it
Hoping you won't
Hoping you realize
You love me more
That I'm better for you
I'm better for your daughter
Or that it's all a sick joke
And everyone is in on it
I lay awake every night
Crying
Praying
I haven't eaten in three days
Slept four hours in three days
Because I'm so scared
I'll lose you
I love you
I always will
No matter your choice

i gave you my heart
i trusted you with it
to not break it
i trusted you
to not smash it
i handed you my life
i asked you for one thing
not to break me
all i wanted in return
was your love
do you know what you did
you took my heart
and my life
you kept them warm
and you still cradel them
in your arms they sleep
i trusted you
and i still do
my love

I haven't seen your face
Heard you voice
Felt your touch
In days
Or was it weeks
It doesn't matter
It feels like forever
I want you with me
I need you with me
I've been with my brother
For the last week
Drinking the sorrow away
Praying I'll get a text
Praying I'll get a call
From you
I feel as it's my fault
That I'm not doing enough
That I'm not doing as I should
I feel it's my fault your not here
It's my fault you haven't talked to me
It's my fault I feel this way
It's my fault I fell in love with you
And it feels so good
But when I don't hear from you
The pain grows and grows
Until I want to scream
Put holes in these walls
Lock myself in and never come out
But I don't do that
For you
Because I love you
More than you will ever know

Before I met you
I never saw myself
Loving another mans child
Like she was my own
Before I met you
I never saw myself
With just one woman
For the rest of my life
But now
I dont see my self
Going one day
With out you
Because I wouldn't trade
One day with you
For a million years
Any other way
I want to spend
My life with you
Give you and her
All u have to offer
To see you smile
To see you be happy
Because I love you
And I mean it

I love
It's to put in words
How much I do
But
Maybe this can
Explain a little
I'd do anything for you
I'd ****
For you
I'd die
For you
I'd sell my soul
To Satan
Just to hear feel your touch
I want to spend
My life with you
I'd walk out if heaven
And in to hell
For you
I'd crawl through
The fire of hell
To get you out
I'd burn the world
To heat you
**** anything
To feed you
Anything you want
I'll get it
I'll walk through the gates of hell
Shake hands with satan
Just to see you smile
I love you
I hope you know how much

I've watched it happen
Morning glories blossoming
In the still dead of the night
It's not possible
I've watched us blossom
Into lovers transcending friends
Our love became divine
Worshiped by the bed sheets
It's not possible
Marvin Gaye wrote his songs
With our kind of love in mind
It's not possible
Theirs nothing I'd rather do
Than hold your hand as we talk
Silent glares screaming the passion
We want to erupt
In the cold sands
Of yesterday's arguing and "I'm sorry"
This is how we make up
This is how we tell the world
We're in love
Even death couldn't break that bond
It's not possible
To admit it
But you're the one who could end this
I could never
Not even fathom the possibility
That the day will come when we part ways
No longer the divine lovers
Heaven and Hell wishes to understand
It's not possible
For anybody to grasp this amount of passion
It's not possible
To ever stop loving you

Who you chose
It's up to you
I love you
If you chose me
I can promise
A life of happiness
A life of pride
You will be able
To say my man is there
Anytime I need him
I will give you what you want
I will take care of your daughter
I'll be there when she needs me
I swear it
I have your ring
I plan on marrying you
Spending my life with you
It's your choice
I just hope
You make the right choice

her
thats my life
all i think about
they took her
they went to far
i hope they die
i hope the rot
i hope they burn in hell
but sometimes
i wonder
what if they really do
could i keep going
of course i could
i would have her back
but is that all i need
hell yeah its all i need
but wait
think about it first
nothing to think about
i need her back
and they will pay
her
i love her
with everything i am

I see it now
I was wrong
I'm not going
To give you some fake
"I'm sorry"  
When I say it
What I really mean is
Please
Please
Please
Forgive me
I ****** up
I'll never do it again
I'll do anything
I'll do anything you say
Just please
I'm begging
And I've never begged before

I will always love you
Remember that.
You can push me away,
But I'll always come back.
You can deny your desire and say it can't be,
But I won't let the wall come between you and me.
You're afraid of you dark side,
The harm you can cause.
I have never feared your hands
Or their sharp, pointy claws.
I love them,
I love you,
I love all that you are.
Protest all you like,
But you will not get far.
You can never change my mind.
My heart will stay true.
I'll do everything I can to get closer to you.
I will wait for you forever, so get used to that fact.
I will always love you,
"Remember That".

just **** me
im ready
for it all to end
i want to die
please
shoot me
stab me
choke me
hang me
cut me
i dont care
just end my life
please
im beging
please
just ******* **** me

They call me crazy
Because I hate life
Maybe they are the crazy ones
Maybe life is a torture
Maybe death is the freedom
The reward for going through
The pain
The heart break
They fear hell
I can't wait to see it
Let's burn
**** it
I want death
Come get me
I dare you
I want to meet satan
Call him a ***** to his face
Laugh when he punishes me
So life or death?
Heaven or hell?

Before now
I never loved anybody
I never trusted anybody
Before now
I couldn't see my self
with one girl my whole life
But now I can't see myself
going one day without you
I'm not proud of my past
But if I could go back
I wouldn't change a thing
Because it made me who I am
And who I'm going to be
It seams like every **** up I made
Everything I did right
Everything I did wrong
Lead me to you
I wouldn't change anything
Because I see myself now
I'm not as good as I'm going to get
I still have a lot to do
But I'm changeing everyday
For you
I make myself a better man
Because I don't to cause any pain
And like I said before
Before now
I couldn't see my self
with one girl my whole life
But now I can't see myself
going one day without you
Because I love you

No one knows what love is
No one feels love
No one cares about love
Love is special
Love is once in a life time
I know what love is
I feel love
Love is how I feel when I see you
Love is what I have for you
Love is love
And I love you

I've drug a blade
Across my wrist
Many times
Felt the blood
Seep out of my body
Felt the flesh tear
And the veins rip apart
As the blade dulled
Felt my body grow cold
As my life leaked away
But when I meet you
I lost the blade
The cuts healed
My body grew warm
Then when we kissed
For the first time
Heat coursed through my veins
My head grew light
Then that special night
When we showed our love
For each other
I knew
Never again
Will I swallow pills
Put a gun in my mouth
Drag a blade on my body
My life will be yours
What's mine will be yours

Love never fails
That's the saying
But I think
They need to change it
To love always fails
I quit
I'll never make the mistake
Of falling in love again
Because when she left
Well let's just say
I can't wait
Till I get the key
To my gun case back
Because when I do
Everyone will see
How much I hurt
Never fall in love again
I won't
It hurts to much

I cheer you up
He does not
I am faithful
He is not
I do not lie
But he does
I am right for you
He is not
I am there for you
He is not
I am better for you
He is not
I love you
But he does not

Nobody knows what I'm afraid of
They think they do
I'm not afraid of snakes
Or rats
Or spiders
Or fire
Not even death scares me
There's only one thing
And that one thing could end me
Could **** me
My biggest
And only fear
Is loseing you
If I lose you
I'd go insane
Crazy
Lock myself away
Put a gun in my mouth
And pull the trigger
I love you
You have no idea
It's impossible to say how much
But I'd do anything for you
Anything at all
I swear
Nothing will make me leave
I'm sorry for what I did
Baby please I'm sorry
I love you

My heart is breaking
My heart is aching
My heart is what I offer you
It is not much
But it's all I have
I offer you my heart
in hopes you take it
In hopes you care for it
My heart breaks more and more everyday
My heart yearns for you to take it
I yearn for you to take it
My heart needs you
I need you
My heart loves you
I love you

hello my love
you know
what you mean to me
but not fully
you are my light
in this dark stormy world
you are the happiness
in my anger
you are the joy
in my depression
you are everything
to me
you are my world
you are my heaven
you are my treasure
I love you
more than life its self

They're still here
They won't go away
Every night they come
Every night they hurt
The ******* nightmares
I know what they mean
I know what I must do
But I just can't
It would make me happy
But hurt too many people
Ill just suffer
To make them happy
I don't sleep
I don't eat
I put on a fake smile
To hide so much pain
Show a fake joy
To hide so much misery
Nobody would understand
So I keep it to myself
Hide it deep
But I claws its way out
It tears me apart
From the inside out
But I just push it deeper
But that just makes it angryer
But I can't hurt anybody
I can't tell them about it
It's to much
But I'll survive


Hopefully

You are my world
You are my life
You are my heart
You are my everything
No one can replace you
No one can take your place
I'll never love any one
As much as I love you
You are one of a kind
There will never be another
For you,my love,are everything
In my world
And nobody can replace that

I used to sleep
But no more
I need you
By my side
Feel your body on mine
Feel your warmth
Hear your voice say olive you
This bed is empty
Lonely
Cold
With out you
It's been so long
Since we have layed together
Since you have feel asleep in my arms
I can't wait untill next time

I trust no one
I have and it ended badly
So I'm done
I'll never trust anybody
I always get lied to
I always get ****** over
All I have to say is
I'm done trusting people
Never again

One day
I'll hold you tight
In my arms everyday
Go to sleep with you
Every night
Wake up with you
Every morning
Tell you I love you
Everyday
Hug you
Kiss you
Every day of the week
One day
It will all be worth it
All the separation
The endless nights
Missing you
Not seeing you
For weeks
It will all happen one day
I swear
I'll make it happen
We will be together
In each others embrace
Nothing holding us back
No one pulling us apart
I swear
One day, my love
One day it will all happen
It will all be worth it