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the story of bobby bradysmith

you see bobby bradysmith is a little cool kid, but he was having a few problems

you see he had childhood schitzophrenia and said he was every star on the television

driving his family mad, and bobby screamed to his dad, why doesn’t anyone like me,

is it because i was mental and his dad started to get really worried, and decided to change his ways

but the other kids didn’t want this, you see they had fun with bobby, ya know teasing him

and bullying him, ya know the whole thing, and one kid named rodney spalms went up to

bobby and said, what’s that your like us, and bobby was really hyped up, saying, i am really one of you

and he said, yeah, as long as you don’t get in our way, you will be one of us, and bobby was happy

but unaware, what he meant by get in our way, but bobby decided to not worry about that while he was young

and decided to go home and watch all the television shows and black beauty and even icarly were two shows

he actually liked, and every time he went to the shopping mall, the young dudes said, whats that bobby, your like us

and even the rougher boys, and hooligans said, yeah yeah yeah, your like us, as long as you don’t get in our way

and rodney wanted to stay at home, as he turned off treating bobby like his kind because he was getting bashed up for it

which wasn’t  really bugging bobby, but still he heard rodney say these simple words, what’s that, your like us, about 100 times

and as bobby’s hormones were going wild, you see with the schitzophrenia in his system, his ***** erected looking at kids legs,

and i mean kids younger than him, well, this felt normal for bobby as his father was married to a younger woman, like all the men

in his family, but bobby was really getting a buzz asking the kid to come to him and grabbing his mouth and then looked at his legs

saying, he was the cool kid now and it happened again and again and bobby was a bully, making mothers and fathers mad, as soon

as their kids were grabbed by bobby, they ran to their parents and parents tore strips of bobby, and still he heard rodney’s voice saying

what’s that your like us, which made bobby grab a few kids at school as well as grabbing a few on their way to school, but still rodney said

what’s that your like us, me and you can be two bullies, bobby, how does that feel, and bobby was getting a buzz, going to the shopping mall

attempting to grab a few more kids, scaring them half to death, making men say, LEAVE MY SON ALONE ****, and bobby said neh,

and then he heard rodney saying, what’s that your like us, your not a mans kid bobby, i am going to get the whole mall crowd to tease you

if you keep it up, but your still like us, rodney said to bobby, as rodney rode his bike saying, you sit in there woosey bobby, your not a bully

or kidnapper, and if you keep it up, you will get prisoners saying what’s that your like us, and i will have power over your mind, to confuse you, ****-face

you see rodney will use his religious powers to make each prisoner say, what’s that your like us, but bobby’s father disagreed with this

and tried to get bobby into jobs he hates, to get his mind of kidnapping, but that only made it worst for bobby, because he lost his job and

took off to the fruit market and tied one 11 year old up to the toilet, now, bobby was scared, so he let him go, instead of leaving the kid there

to squirm, and he still heard rodney say, what’s that your like us, but really rodney hated him doing this to all the kids, and befriended him right away

and bobby only spent a weekend in the lock up, and got out of his jail sentence and placed on a psychiatric order, and he had to see a probation officer

and bobby was relieved and was ready to hear rodney say, what’s that your like us, but it faded away, and people said, instead, i am going to get you back,

for what you did to the kids, and this made bobby very scared, because, the reason why he committed these horrible offences, was because he had

schitzophrenia, which developed into adult schitzophrenia, and made bobby get bullied on the street and then go home and take it out on, his poor

old mum and dad, and bobby was thinking this was a game, but his parents wanted bobby locked away, because bobby’s dad spoke up for bobby in court

and still bobby to his dad, wasn’t very grateful, and fighting with them, every blasted day, and bobby wasn’t winning this battle, so he decided to do some

volunteer work at st vincent de paul, where he met francine, who was a really good helper and also has the gift to make anyone a good helper and bobby

started work there emptying the clothing bins and other man like jobs and then bobby asked francine, as christmas was fast approaching and bobby wanted to

apoligize to the city for his schitzophrenic behaviour of the past, by playing santa claus in the st vincent de paul, and showing kids he was a nice santa, well

a few kids told bobby he was a fake santa, and the mall santa was much better, but bobby’s medication made him handle that with care, and after 2 years

because the medication was making bobby nice to kids as santa claus, rodney’s voice was coming back in his head saying, i am very impressed with you bobby

you know playing santa to test you out, what’s that your like us now man, and bobby was handing a sweet to an older kid, and he said, i don’t want a lolly, i am an

older kid, i don’t believe in santa, and rodney’s voice was giving bobby delusions, which didn’t stop him from being santa, actually he went out on the street

and murdered a cat, and when the police caught bobby, his parents said, send him to the psych ward, and as bobby entered the psych ward, bobby immediately

thought, this was the gateway to heaven, and then rodney’s voice entered his head, saying, i am not mucking with the crazy person, and this made bobby scream

to get out of the psych ward, every time his parents left, and when bobby got out, he had delusions that there was a money tree on the internet, and the way

to get more money, is download a money tree fertiliser and also booked himself on a private jet to the USA, and every time he saw a crime or bad weather

he would write I WANT TO GIVE $456 TO SAVE THE WHALES, or something like that, and he started to get better and went back to vinnies to work

and play santa at the end of the year, this was something that bobby looked forward to playing santa every year, but bobby’s medication was forcing him

to look up to space, and being santa and going down to the coast was his only things he liked, and then in 2007, bobby started working at graythorne village

a place for the disadvantaged to live, and still played santa, actually, bobby took holiday leave to play santa at christmas to make the kids happy and then

in 2009, bobby got sick of this looking up, as his job prospects were going places, and asked the psychiatrist, and in about 3 weeks, they changed his medication

and the medication was giving bobby energy to run and at the end of the year, be a fit santa claus, and then a new boss came at st vincent de paul, and after

all the fun of getting kids photos, sitting on his lap, the new boss wanted to change so much, so bobby gave up his santa claus gig, and later on lost his job

in 2013, because he was losing his cool streak, he enjoyed playing santa, he enjoyed helping at graythorne village, and rodney’s voice came back in his head

saying what’s that your a crazy person, what’s that your a crazy person, and bobby yelled at rodney’s voice, on the side of the cars, and then bobby found another way

to keep sane, and that was write, write and more writing to make him feel cool, and now bobby goes to poetry slams and writing groups and theatre acting courses

bobby might not have a job at present, but the writing, stops him from straying from family life,

I AM BOBBY, HE IS BASED ON MY LIFE
it’s hard to express yourself when, the voices say i am snitching or squealing, i am not, i am trying to express myself

you see it’s hard to express myself when the people know they are in the wrong and they know it, so they tease in a very horrible way, i am a person

you see it’s hard to express yourself when, nobody cares what you have to say,

i don’t want to have this horrible teasing voice when i am expressing myself

i am not squealing, i am trying to clean my brain out, mind you it’s hard to express myself when i hear voices of my past being horrible to me

i don’t deserve this, you see it’s hard to express myself when when i express myself, my dad comes in and says your too shy to be like brian

let us men take over, but what i am trying to do is clean my brain, i don’t want give money till i want to give money, i need to look after myself

i didn’t want to buy that kid a pack of smokes, i hate kids who tease like that, just to get me in trouble with the men

it’s hard to express myself when, people think i liked being shy as a kid, when i hated it, it’s hard to express myself when my voices

are keeping me with the crazy people in the psych ward, i will never be as ******* up as them, but they have problems, and i am a nice person

i am too nice to be a psych ward patient

it’s hard to express myself when i feel people are saying your getting kidnapped all the fucken time

it’s hard to express myself when people judge me me of how i used to be, and not how i am now

it’s hard to express myself when people treat me like the person i used to be, a scared to express myself dude, to who i am dude, a loving life dude

it’s hard to express myself when i feel people are trying to get me back to the person i was, because, i ******* a lot of people, I HAVE CHANGED

it’s hard to express myself i hear that voice of the past saying, what’s ya problem, ****, what’s ya problem, ****

it’s hard to express myself when, the voices laugh at me when i have problems at doing something, i don’t want to be shy no more

it’s hard to express myself when, people say when i say i am not shy, people presume i want to fight, I DON’T

it’s hard to express myself when people are saying i am christian, but i am a buddhist, ya know cleaning my brain

it’s hard to express myself when i say i need to clean my brain, someone gets a garden hose and splashes it in my eyes saying, your still a little shy boy, LEAVE ME ALONE

it’s hard to express myself when, people are wanting me to do what i used to do, when i want to move on to the next phase of my life, putting my art and writing out there

it’s hard to express myself when, people saying we’re still not leaving you alone, all the fucken time, LEAVE ME ALONE, ****

it’s hard to express myself when people wanting me to be like their mob, when i hate being treated like a little woosey

i would like to find the person who put the voices in my head, and give him these voices to see how he likes it,

I AM NOT MENTAL, I HAVE SCHITZOPHRENIA, ok
Toilet paper toilet paper
Why do people in this time
Feel the need to stock up on toilet paper
What is the point of stocking up on toilet paper
That just proves there are a lot of ***** done in a day
People are buying 5 packs of 12 toilet paper, they must have diarrhoea or something
I personally think it is stupid
They say I gotta wipe my ***
About 56 times a day
**** me dead
If you want to have enough toilet paper in a week
STOP FUCKEN EATING
Because I don’t see the connection
With the carrona virus and toilet paper
People are just scared or stupid
Well, they are more stupid
Saying toilet paper toilet paper
We gotta have enough toilet paper
Gotta wipe me ***
Gotta make sure we don’t use our hands discusting
They are also trying to stock up on medications
Mainly a junkies thing though
The carrona virus hits me
Gotta have a Panadol
Or nurefen or Sudafed
Why the **** do people convert into being junkies
People sitting in the mall
Enjoying a high calorie lunch
With 17 undescribed medicine and 6 12 pack toilet rolls
The carrona virus can’t get us
What a bunch of crap
No, those people are news-scared junkies and drug junkies
When I say news-scared
I mean they hear we need toilet paper
So we buy six 12 packs of toilet paper
We are free from any virus
That comes our way
Athena doesn’t heal you if you be a ****** so why do they do it
I am in pain they say
I am in pain
No
They are not in pain
They are junkies and news-scared
Personally I had to buy paper towels to replace toilet paper
Hopefully that works
****** junkies
John hawker English also was the official surgeon for the Swedish army.and this was a hard job patching up each and every wounded soldier who suffered there and sometimes it was easy and sometimes it was mighty hard for him
Because being apart of the Swedish army and fixing people up makes John think that the people he couldn't save and
All the people who yelled at him
You see John never had a family apart from a brother and parents because he devoted his
Soldiers at the Swedish army as his family and yes it was emotional when he couldn't save anyone and when he died
He had the Swedish army by his side nobody could save him
Despite John putting his best work for the Swedish army
Mind you death happens
You can't save everyone
NGUS'S ******


YEAH IT'S FUN TO SEE ANGUS'S AC/DC'S ******
HE FELT HE WAS WEIRD, BUT ALSO FELT QUITE COOL
CAUSE AS HE DANCES HIS COOL DANCE STYLE
OFF WENT HIS PANTS TO SEE HIS COOL JOCKS
HE PARTIES UP, YEAH HE PARTIES DOWN
AND HE PARTIES RIGHT WHERE ANY CONSERVOS FROWN
AND IT'S COOL TOO SEE ANGUS'S ACCA DACCA ******, YEAH
YA SEE HE TAKES HIS HAND AND RIPS THE SHIRT FROM HIS BACK
AND THEN SANG OUT THE FLAMING WORDS, WE GOT THE JACK
PLAYING WITH HIS JOCKS, THE ACCA DACCA JOCKS
RUNNIG AROUND SINGING HIS HEAVY METAL SOUND
PRETTY COOL, FOR A ACCA DACCA SINGER LIKE HIM, DUDES
NOW HE IS PLAYING THE GUTAR WITH THE GREATEST OF EASE
AND AS HIS ****** LOOK COOL INDEED
COOL INDEED COOL INDEED COOL INDEED
ANGUS YOUNG IS MIGHTY COOL INDEED
SHOOT TO ****, WE BREAK NO RULES
I DID BUT ONLY THE MORALIC RULE
ANGUS'S ******, OOPS HIS JOCKS
GO HOME AND READ FOX IN ANGUS'S ******

YEAH IT'S FUN TO SEE ANGUS'S AC/DC'S ******
HE FELT HE WAS WEIRD, BUT ALSO FELT QUITE COOL
CAUSE AS HE DANCES HIS COOL DANCE STYLE
OFF WENT HIS PANTS TO SEE HIS COOL JOCKS
HE PARTIES UP, YEAH HE PARTIES DOWN
AND HE PARTIES RIGHT WHERE ANY CONSERVOS FROWN
AND IT'S COOL TOO SEE ANGUS'S ACCA DACCA ******, YEAH
YA SEE HE TAKES HIS HAND AND RIPS THE SHIRT FROM HIS BACK
AND THEN SANG OUT THE FLAMING WORDS, WE GOT THE JACK
PLAYING WITH HIS JOCKS, THE ACCA DACCA JOCKS
RUNNIG AROUND SINGING HIS HEAVY METAL SOUND
PRETTY COOL, FOR A ACCA DACCA SINGER LIKE HIM, DUDES
NOW HE IS PLAYING THE GUTAR WITH THE GREATEST OF EASE
AND AS HIS ****** LOOK COOL INDEED
COOL INDEED COOL INDEED COOL INDEED
ANGUS YOUNG IS MIGHTY COOL INDEED
SHOOT TO ****, WE BREAK NO RULES
I DID BUT ONLY THE MORALIC RULE
ANGUS'S ******, OOPS HIS JOCKS
GO HOME AND READ FOX IN
YEAH I LOVE ICE CREAM
AND I LOVE LIFE GOING ON ADVENTURES
I LOVE CONCERTS, I HEAR CANBERRA
SAYING, LET'S PUT ON POISON CONCERT
FOR BRIAN ALLAN AND AC/DC CONCERT FOR
BRIAN ALLAN AND TWISTED SISTER FOR BRIAN ALLAN
YEAH, I STILL LOVE HEAVY METAL MUSIC, BETTER
THAN THE ARMY, I LIKE LIVE CONCERTS
I THINK IT'S RATHER GRAND
HEARING, THE CROWD YELL ANGUS ANGUS ANGUS
LIKE THE ****** BURGER ANGUS
I ALSO HATE DAD'S VOICE SAYING YOUR LIUKE ME AND MUMMY BRIAN
I LOVE HEAVY METAL AND I AM HEARING THUNDERSTRUCK AT PRESENT
I AM NOT LIVING IN THE PAST
I AM LIVING IN THE PRESENT FOR A PRESENT
I PREFER HEAVY METAL, I ALWAYS LIKED HEAVY METAL
BETTER THAN THE ARMY, I KNOW THEY ****
BUT WHERE'S THE THRILL, HEAVY METAL MUSIC IS SOOOO COOOOOL
LET'S PARTY PARTY PARTY ALL DAY AND ALL NIGHT
I WILL CLEAN MY HOUSE LATER, AC/DC ARE MORE IMPORTANT MATE
BEING COOL IS MORE IMPORTANT AT PRESENT
I LOVE ACCA DACCA, THEY ARE ****** RADICALLY AWESOME DUDE
HEAVY METAL GOES UP, HEAVY METAL GOES DOWN
HEAVY METAL IS PLAYED NICE AND LOUD
AND THEV SCREAM OUT TO THE REAL LIFE CROWD
YEAH ACCA DACCA ARE COOL
WE ARE GETTING RID OF DADS OLD FOGIE
LIKING MY LITTLE CLEANER 24 HOURS A DAY
I KNOW I MIGHT HAVE WANTED THAT, TIMES CHANGE, DUDE
ACCA DACCA ARE RAD
1.6k · Feb 2015
god and the devil who is bob
you see bob delahunty, one da7y developed this website, where he takes people on quests

to find out whether or not really exists, and first stop was jerusealum, where he spoke to a rabbi,

and bob asked the question does GOD exist, and the rabbi said, i can be your saviour where

whenever you need any answers, i can show you, ok,

after that, bob went to the BUDDHIST temple in taibet, and the buddhist nuns said, god is just

a couple of easy answers, we need people to understand that the answer is to mend every blade of grass

and bob left thinking mmmmm interesting, and the muslims said, god, there is no god, but there is mohammad,

and he is the same, as this GOD, and bob went away singing

god is the devil and the devil is bob

god is the devil and the devil is bob

god is the devil and the devil is bob

GOD, THE DEVIL, ANNNND BOB

the next part of bobs quest was going over to the catholic church and after 12 minutes of hearing the boring catholic morals

bob went over to the priest, how many children have you ****** today, and priest got offended in what bob asked, and through

bob outside, with the tune going, god is the devil and the devil is bob

god is the devil and the devil is bob

god is the devil and the devil is bob

GOD, THE DEVIL, AND BOB

bob was kicked out of every religious place in the world, so he decided to gather some religious freaks, to form his own religion

going out on the underground to meet different religious people on the street, first was wendy sweeeeet lips who was a ****** by night

nun and helper of the poor by day, and she was nice to bob, ands bob said, i can get a decent **** out of this pretty lady, time and time again

and when the nun was asked to leave the catholic church despite her keeping the ****** bit to herself, she decided to join BOB,  religion

by a man named bob, bob had this philosophy, no ugly wannabes, just **** legs and pretty faces

bob asked the ******-nun, do you think GOD exists, and they said, we don’t hate any religion, but, we hate catholics, because, their morals

are against our good work here, we don’t have a GOD, policy here, we are the face of the devil, but the devil brings happiness,

you know to angry *** crazed men, aren’t they needed to wipe off the angry look, and bob went away, who cares, and sang his song

god is the devil, and the devil is bob

god is the devil, and the devil is bob

god is the devil and the devil is bob

GOD THE DEVIL, WHO IS BOB

and bob said, who cares if i’m the devil

i don’t look at the symbol of jesus nailed to a cross being a symbol of peace

jesus exixts, but the way he is killed is the REAL DEVIL

BECAUSE, all together now


god is the devil, and the devil is bob

god is the devil, and the devil is bob

god is the devil, and the devil is bob

GOD, THE DEVIL, AND BOB
I am a nice person
I don’t want to fight
I am a nice person
I am not getting bullied
I am too nice to be a bad guy
I am a nice person
Yes I am
I hear about all the fights
They have in football
And I think it is ****** disgraceful
You see there is this poor Down syndrome man getting bashed at the football
It is totally disgraceful mate oh yes it is
I am a nice person
I don’t put up with that
Cause I am too nice to be like these
Rotten people
You see I am not a hooligan
I am not a ****
I am a nice person
And mate do I love life
You see I don’t tease people at the football I find it is a waste of time
I am a nice person
All of the time
I vote for the political party
That wants to help the poor
I watch family vlogs as opposed
To watching real life crime
Anything that upsets me
I don’t watch
Cause I am a nice person
All of the time
The women love me
Because I am so nice
I don’t believe in violence mate
It isn’t very cool
I am a nice person
I break no rules
Sometimes I swear
But not all the time
Cause I am nice to everyone I meet
Nice nice nice nice very very nice
I go to my art groups
And I do my art
Getting all of my problems
Out of my brain
Cause I am a nice person
Yes I am
I certainly don’t want to fight
Cause I am nice
the life of patrick youngspeer


young patrick youngspeer, is a very nice kid, but in one year he lost his dad

and that made him devastated and patrick was so determined to keep his dads

spirit alive, he went on a trip all over outer space, but the problem was his dad

didn’t want this, and held his mouth saying to patrick, don’t do what you used to do, buddy

because i really hate being known as the old digger of the block, i hated being called the

great big old fogie, just to protect my son patrick, but patrick who was so devious and cunning,

like a little kid at as pre school, and patrick’s dad was really worried, he went down to try and find

where his next life will be, but patrick wesn’t sure he wanted his father to move on, oh well, he wanted him

to reincarnate, bur not move on, oh well, maybe move on, but patrick wants to meet his father’s next life

one of these days, but mr youngspeer hated the idea of meeting his first born son patrick more often than the others

but patrick wasn’t getting what he wants, so on the street, patrick youngspeer, yelled to his schizophrenic paranormal voices

****** oathe i am a cool kid, your a yeah mate yeah kid, cool kids do, what i do, yeah, only yeah mate yeah kids do what you do, yeah

and mr youngster said, nobody’s teasing you patrick, so why are you worried, and patrick said, they are trying to take my beliefs away

when i am powerful enough to reincarnate people from death to new life, but mr youngspeer said, no, i need to reform him, because he is

looking at the meat on the kids legs, on the youtube clips, but patrick said, i am not, i am keeping up to date with dead members of my family

i am not taking this further, i know it sounds weird, but just to christians points of view, and patrick, who is a nasty writer, and over half of his

pieces of writing, were rubbishing christians, one online dude on writers cafe, over the internet said, patrick should stop hassling christians

because it is a lovely religion, but despite patrick apologising to this lady, and the fact that patrick not meaning it,she told patrick that he was a

very nice person, and patrick went on to write songs and stories and after his mother went on a holiday to visit her sister josephine, who was a

healthy person, never smoked, never really did drugs, was diagnosed with lung cancer and patrick felt bad for his aunty josephine,he decided

to write a little poem for her

my aunty jo, my aunty jo

i really feel for you aunty jo

you don’t deserve what god brought to you

i really feel for you aunty jo

i might be a tad naughty and led you astray

i might have never given you a chrissy card today

but i care for you, oh my aunty jo

i care for you a lot, my aunty, yeah

i don’t want to see you die, jo, i thought you were too healthy

i know that you could beat this, so i will pray for you, yeah

i will pray for the powers of athena will come down and whisk and whisk and really

really whisk your lung cancer, away

you see i know yiou have grandchildren, who don’t want to see you go, love

you see, though i don’t want her to suffer but i don’t want us too either

please save my aunty jo, from this awful cancer shock

i want you to cure my aunty jo, miss athena, please save her now

she is too nice to die, the world ain’t ready to lose my aunty jo mate, no, athena please cure her now

please save my dear aunty jo

and as patrick was finishing  his poem, his father brought to planets together to make sure aunty jo will be alright, by releasing athena’s magic

and he did this with patrick youngspeers help, you see what a fabulous team we have trying to keep the family alive, but the only way mr youngspeer

will help his son like this, is to be dead but now his dad is dead, patrick is helping with his spiritual healing, and patrick said, drink plenty of coke, (party juice)

to save the workl, yet again, eventually mr youngspeer said, i don’t care if you don’t work, help people with me, because nobody really cared for you, nobody cares

unless you converted to christinailty, patrick said, don’t **** me into your christian ways, you fucken christians, i am your cosmic friend, but this christian said

i want to go up to outer space to help my father, patrick said, we are not ready to see the back of you yet aunty jo, and mr youngspeer said, no patrick, we ain’t

ready to see you go, no way, you see my pal, patrick youngspeer is based on my life
you see i saw the dietitian this morning and i have to avoid foods

that are high in saturated fats, like low fat milk and low fat cheese

and sardines and tangarines and i have to lay low of coca cola

as well as snowdrops marshmallow chocolate, and i need to

really look after myself, in a way to make my cholesterol low

i can’t have hot chips except for oven fries, low in saturated fats

i can have gravox but it has to low in saturated fat not like fatrty gravy

i am having steak and broccoli and cauliflower tonight,

and i am grilling the steak

i bought some nuts for afternoon tea and i forgot to get the yoghurt

but i can have a tangerine for morning tea and a few nuts as well, dudes

next wednesday at the poetry slam, i am going treat myself to a coke or two

and get back into my meal plan after that is over

you see athena is going to work towards me not getting hungry between meals

but it might not work, seeing i am used to eating too much

you see i still have spurs in my foot, but athena is working towards making my feet comfortable

ya see dudes, i am going to try and make this work, i know i like coke as a cosmic drink

and it may improve the source of my life, but if i work to cutting down on coke

i might lower my cholesterol and i might feel better

you see i don’t want to go in the psych ward again, cause that is where the crazy people are

and i am not crazy, last time i was there i was a artist and writer and i performed

concerts to improve the quality of the inmates life

ya see, i like coke but i might need to cut back, so i can lower my cholesterol

and not make the dietitian say, there isn’t much point you coming here

and i think i will feel better, and think about the stories i want to write

but i don’t want to go to the nuthouse, because they are all delusional

so, dudes, i white roll with low fat cheese and sardine and tomato for lunch

i nibbled on nuts in the afternoon and for dinner i had steak and broccoli and cauliflower

and for tonights snack i will have a tangerine,

and i will try to do this every day, no cream buns for now, no coke for now

my mum will help me with some of the ingredients for what i am going to eat

sardines are good, and so is tuna and salmon

i want to save money, so if i cut back, not give up, just cut back on coke junk food etc

i will feel healthy, and if i feel angry i will write it out of me

like yummy srcummy cream buns and fruit and nut chocolates yuuuuuummmmmmmy

but athena is going to work to lower my cholesterol and make me feel better

because i feel like the forces of evil are trying to get me to do what i used to do, in 1989-90

and i still hear voices of people saying i am SHY I AM SHY, i can tell you one thing, I AM NOT SHY

i don’t want to get fought of killed and i want athena to help me from dying of high cholesterol

you see i don’t believe in fasting, and i want athena to heal my body, with each of my medications

you see i know i ran off my fat and then i became fat again, but then when i was running

i obseesed so much with it, i kept yelling at my schizophrenic voices, so running was really working

but in hindsight, i still want to walk, and hopefully i can get back into running again without the voices

so, come on guys, please help athena to bring my cholesterol down, ok
lucky died to bring his previous life back to the young dudes



you see, scott mcdonald, who was my old school mate died way back

in the 1990s and wanted to reincarnate as our family cat, lucky, you see

lucky was a cute, but cranky cat especially when it rained, it was scott trying

to rid his crankiness he was like at school, but dad copped all the flaming flack

and in the end lucky was tired and had to be put downy the vet, and it was from

that moment i started hearing voices at work, which drove me really crazy, you

see one voice was from my scott pushing words into pats voice saying, i am not mucking

with yiou like i used to muck with brian, your not a flaming adult, and the boss of mitchell ACTEW

sue, didn’t know what was wrong with me, as i was yelling at my voices through the building

and when i got the job at lower molonglo, cath was worried about me too, and scott mcdonald was

having a field day, trying to lift me away from the powerful thinking people away from me, you see

scott was a bit sick of me, and it looked like he hated me, but then as he reincarnated into my family

as our cat lucky, because one man called me a great big ugly snout and i called dad a great big ugly

snout pushing me with brendan our next door neighbour who i was trying to keep kidnapped with me,

like the song went kidnap brian and kidnap brendan keep brian and brendan in our cages, and scott’s spirit

wanted to reform me, so he made buddha reincarnate him into 2 cats, a grey cat named muscles, and a

grey and white cat named lucky, and muscles lived in my flat and lucky lived with my folks, and in 2004

i started hearing voices from scott mcdonald, trying to make muscles into a wild dingo or a raccoon

and i had to **** it before it killed azaria chamberlain, but i killed muscles and scott mcdonald created

pluto as the love planet and i went to the psych ward to try and be placed on more medications and mum

thought they let me out too early, and scott blamed dad for allowing to have muscles killed, like he could’ve

taken muscles out of my hands, and lucky was blaming dad for the rain and every time i picked lucky up he will

get cranky, you see lucky was caught up a tree for 3 weeks, where scott said, your not one of the young dudes

anymore, and scott was performing concerts on the love planet, and now when i played concerts, scott has been

planting the word woosey in pats voice in my head, and scott was getting tired of teasing dad, and said goodbye to

lucky and as i said, i got voices since lucky died which led me to the psych ward in november 2013, which made me

talk about my previous lives and made me do art and try and get better, while scott mcdonald is now baby **** on the

youtube family the shaytards, and scott is happy to be a human again, after all this crap, and now i am trying to get better

by writing stories and drawing pictures to get the evil out of me, my voices say from people on the street, is never ever

get anymore cats, ok
I will write 100 poems to make people feel at ease
Like Clancy of the overflow
Mulga bill and buttons and bows
Those 100 poems will be
The best I ever wrote
You see working class man
And blue sky mine and waltzing Matilda and buttons and bows
I want to support my footy team
And cheer very loud
Saying go Sydney go Green Bay
Go Barcelona nothing better than buttons and bows
I want to be rich you see
Make a lot of cash
I will have a party with alcohol
And bob hope singing buttons and bows
Making us happy with buttons and bows
I want to watch a tv show like a great soap opera
Like home and away packed to the radars 800 words and buttons and bows
Days of our lives and neighbours and young and the restless and buttons and bows
Bold and the beautiful and buttons and bows
1.5k · Feb 2015
athena heals my teeth
the update on my teeth worked on by athena


you see, i take paracetamol, and brush my teeth

and i am sure the coke helps it as well, and athena \

sprays a big dose of methane, i do this, to avoid

going to the dentist, and with the paracetamol and fluoride

and the gas in the coca cola, with the dose of methane

it really leaves my mouth very clean, and cavity free

you see i recommend  athena to everyone who is poor

fillings ain’t really good for you, no, what fillings do

is put too much chemicals in your mouth, and

your mouth feels cleaner from what i do anyway

you see the paracetamol really relieves any ache or pain

and the gas from the methane and coke, can get into the mouth

and then the fluoride as you brush, can also clean and clean your teeth

and athena’s way might sound unrealistic, but, dudes, it works

and it’s more relaxing, and i can’t feel pain no more

doctors and dentists on earth will disagree with this

but why is it working, in my body

so, who needs earth dentists when your got athena from above
Aussie Aussie Aussie
I am a fair dinkum a Aussie
And I love life every day
I hate this panic shopping
I think it is ****** stupid
That isn’t loving life
I hate this ****** virus
It is trappers (the devil)’s
Way of stopping us
But I love how people
Are taking to social media
To spread love to this great big world
We need to find a cure or a vaccine
For the caronavirus
To make us all love life
I am an Aussie Aussie Aussie
I am a fair dinkum a Aussie
And every day I love life
The shops are taking desperate measures to keep the stock lasting longer
But it causes frustration amongst
All sorts of shoppers
And it doesn’t make them learn
I love the footy and I still want to cheer them on
In these hard times
So if you want to rid this virus
So Aussie Aussie Aussie
Fair dinkum a Aussie
I love I live my
I love life every day
I live my life in every way
1.5k · Jun 2015
concert from jupiter
briano alliance performing at two moons jupiter



hi dudes, here is our first song, titled i am not a hooligan i am yeah mate yeah kid


you see dudes, i don’t want to fight, i am not a cool kid to that

and i definatley ain’t a cool kid to dad

i know i had problems, but i know what i am

i am a yeah mate yeah kid, cause yeah mate yeah kids, don’t sit around like little cool kids do

like sitting there too shy to go home, i don’t do that, well, i did, but i was trying to be cool

but i am a yeah mate yeah kid, who doesn’t wanna fight, no ****** fear

i am never the type to say oh ****** dear

i get the itchy feeling because i used to be an adult

no mate no hooligan for me, and i am no geek, unless you talk about an internet geek

u am cool, i’m cool, the coolest dude i am cool, to a family person’s point of view

i don’t believe in talking tough to people i don’t **** people off, no dude

u want people to say to me, your still a family person, brian

instead of letting out a really old misery guts frown

you see i liked dad, he protected me, good, but he died, and i have to understand, he can’t protect me anymore

and dad was trying to protect me, even if to my mind he looked like a hooligan

i know dad wasn’t being a hooligan, he was a great big old fogie

and i don’t want to be a young dude, because i hate to fight

i don’t want to be a girl, cause, i hate cat fights and i never want to be treated like a koomarri man just to muck around with, yeah

and i hear my best mate saying, that he is a bigger boy than me

you see he is like little peter brady, but he doesn’t think so, but i cvan tell you one thing, i ain’t little peter brady, i am like sam marshall formerly from home and away

i don’t want to hear voices, when i speak the truth like that

you see, i liked how sam acted, and i don’t agree with that ya got to be tough to be a cool kid, crap

i think if you leave them alone, they will leave you alone

i like watching footy, and i played footy in my front yard

but i don’t like being treated like a hooligan, no that isn’t what i like at all, at ****** all

hi dudes, here is another song called kidnap brian and kidnap brendan, just a song

kidnap brian and kidnap brendad keep brian and brendan in their cages

we need to keep them both *******, keep them both *******

keep brian and brendan ******* gracefully, keep them both in their cages

help let me out of this cage, says brian and brendan in their cages

oh yeah mate yeah, keep them both ******* gracefully

you see, this tune really worried dad, and triggered off a lot of hooligan voices

you see, it gives someone coming into my house, putting a hand on my chest and up to my mouth

saying, your still a cool kid, briany

you see people stick their fingers up at me, saying, i am stupid, i don’t appreciate that, one little bit

i want to be treated like a cool adult, i am not a kid, no i think any adult who tries to be a kid is stupid

i am a cool adult, i am a cool adult, i am a cool adult, who sleeps on the couch, like a *****

everyone goes to bed, while i sleep on the couch

cause i am scared of fighting, it’s only natural ya know

people who go to bed are nerds, and i am no nerd, so leave me alone

you see my circle of life, is walk around, get grabbed and tied to poles, and being forced to be in horrifying situations, I HATE THAT

so kidnap brian and kidnap brendan, keep brian and brendan in their cages

hi dudes, my next song is if your happy and you know it, have a party

if your happy and you know it, have a party

if your happy and you know it have a party

if you are happy and you know it, and you will party every night yeah

if you are happy and you know it have a party

3  6   9  the goose drank wine

sam kinison chewed tobacco up on cloud 9

my dad choked after trying an artichoke

and everyone reincarnates whether they like it or not

you see slim dusty played duncan, ya see

saying my earth life is hayley from brattayley fame

dad said, come on slim do ya stuff

and smoke your cigarette getting it out in 1 big huff, like my son

3 6  9, the goose drank wine

sam kinison chewed tobacco up on cloud 9

my dad choked after trying an artichoke

come on dudes, if your happy and you know it, have a party

whether you are, have a party

if your happy and you know it, and want a way to show it

if your happy and know it, have a party

hi dudes, here is another song called duncan

i would love to have a methane with duncan

we love to have a methane with dunc

we drink in such a way, man

to improve the quality of our life

we drink in all the planets, and the atmosphere is great

i would love to have a methane with duncan

cause he is our mate

i would love to have a methane with patrick

yeah i love to drink methane with him

we drink in moderation, and improve the quality of our life

we drink in the planets oh yeah, where the atmosphere is great

i would love to have a methane with patrick cause he is a great mate

i want people to help me with wireless

yeah the methane is all over me then

yeah, ya see if people helped me, i will understand

why people aren’t listening to mr

i know i ain’t a hooligan, i hate being treated like that, not great

i want people to help me with wireless, dude

so, they can be a great mate

to be a great mate, oh yeah

i would love to have methane with anyone including my dad

you see to rid his old timer, i will tip the methane all ****** over poor old him

you see, the methane burns him right down, to betty, yeah that’s great

i would love to throw methane on my dad, yeah

cause he was a good mate

ok dudes, that is it, of spilling my guts and pouring bad stuff out of my brain, bobye, bob
Don Lane and Graham Kennedy entertain in the after life cafe




Don lane '.    Oh yeah I am putting on my top hat, and I also wear nothing else
Because I am dead now, and I don't have to worry about being appropriately dressed,
And I also have a lady sitting over at the bar, and she has great looking legs and *****,
I want to go over to her, hey lady, how are you going today
Lady'.  I am fine, and I am Marilyn Monroe
Don Lane'.   I would've loved to interview on my show
Marilyn'.  No, I heard the afterlife was a good place for me, I was famous in life, I don't want to be famous here.
Don Lane'.  Ok let's go to this table, I know you as well, refresh my memory
And yes Ricky May poured sixteen ice cubes all over Don and
Don said  well, obviously these people didn't want to be famous, ok, who are you
Man said'.  I am Don Bradman
Don Lane'.  You died before me, have you showed the afterlife how you played cricket
Don Bradman'. Yes, and we beat Saturn by 15 runs, and I finally averaged 100, it is pretty cool
Don Lane'.   Who do you play next
Don Bradman'.  Well this weekend we play the Martians from Mars
Don Lane'.  Well here is Graham Kennedy with his after life song
Well I said I wouldn't make it here
Because of the weird joked I told
And I thought the devil will own my soul
But I was stood up straight and tall
Felthad a weird beer up here, they call it AAAA
And I have always wondered since that say
What does the A mean
Then it hit me, oh silly me
The A meant Afterlife
And we are with Ricky May and Tony Grieg
And Don Bradman and Joh Bjieke peterson
Yes, this afterlife is so much fun with a AAAA in my hand,
Ok Don Lane let's parry in the afterlife
Don Lane'.  Ok thanks Graham, now here is Bon Scott with his after life song
The clouds are shaking
And the moon is rocking with the men who are put in there
To scare bad guys away from doing evil on earth
And yes, AC/DC are still going strong on Earth
And I am doing well up here , because it is so easy, man
To be fit and healthy up here, I said you
Shook the after life, all night long
Oh yeah baby, you
Shook the afterlife, all night long
Don Lane'. See you next time, bye
Bradley Simmons is a cool kid to his dad, and now he is happy with dad





Bradley lived in Cowra with his mum and dad and brother Kenneth, and Kenneth was a real mans kid who plays with his friends in the street and then he goes home to watch Disneyland with his dad, and he mainly liked to watch westerns, while Bradley was certain that there is something going on in the air, and went to church with his mum.
You see this wasn't really tbe best family unit, especially when families go out to fun family events, but Bradley and Kenneth's dad was a director at kids town, which is a Buddhist drop in centre, who looke after the daily needs of under fortunate kids, and Bradley and Kenneth were told to come into these centers, when their dad organised some games to brighten their spirits, one game was spin the Buddha, where you get a spinning buddha statue and the kids get a lolly pop if the Buddha spun towards them, and even though they thought it was lame, well you can see it in their faces, Bradley thought it was cool and then said to his dad how about I plan games for them to play, like soccer out in the paddock, or even cricket, or tennis, and one of the homeless Boyd sadism I am too poor to get into Auskick, so can we play Aussie rules, and if I whip your ***, I know I can play for Richmond, and Kenneth who tried to be the cool kid there said, well if you make Richmond, it won't mean you are good, it means you play for Richmond, and Bradley told Kenneth to be nice to him, he obviously likes Richmond, and Kenneth said to Brad, why don't you shut up you stupid old ******* ****, and Bradley said, I am cool, I can turn these kids away from you.
Then Bradley said ok it's time to play a board game and little Ryan said, well what does board games have to do with helping us get houses, and Bradley said, oh no I ain't that powerful, I am just a kid, I can't give you a home, no,,I am here to make you feel that people actually care for you, because I think it would be tough for you having no home to go to and the kids listened to Bradley like he was one of the adults and being a typical jealous little brother started to get very jealous especially when e tried to make a joke, and they told him to get lost, because your brother is boosting our self esteem.
At the end of the day, Kenneth said to Bradley, you are a stupid ******* old *******, playing board games doesn't make them really feel better, what makes them feel better is taking them for walks around, but you are too stupid for that aren't you Bradley, you are too fucken shy to be like those kids friends, you see they all like me better, they just tolerate you, so go back to your bedroom and go and do some underage *******, no you aren't one of us boys, *******.
Bradley was upset with what Kenneth said and went to his bedroom and cried for hours and since then he didn't have inspiration to go back to his dads work to help the kids there, but his dad said, your brother is just jealous, and you should do this if it makes you feel happy, and his dad said, and if you find that Kenneth is proved right, just ignore them, and you can start off by ignoring Kenneth, because really, I wish every kid could have the inspiration that you bring to kids town, don't let teasing stop you for reaching your full potential, Bradley, Bradley decided his dad was right, and he kept on going to kid's town to make a difference in these children's lives, playing games and talking to one another, this was so cool the kids thought, Bradley thought he was growing up, and Kenneth who decided to come in, because he thought kids need to be kids, yes, his dad was doing a good job, but really Kenneth had what the kids really wanted, like he bought his computer and showed him the virtual world, and Bradley said no kids playing board games are fun, and computer games can wreck your eyesight, but the kids decided that Kenneth needed to be heard too, after all he is the other son of the kid's town leader, so they listened to him for a while and instead of trying to play along, Bradley felt hurt and said, ******* all, and went to his room to cry, and all the tough boys said, 'what a cry baby' and then he said his brother isn't an monster, we still like him, but Kenneth wanted to make Bradley jitter, so he now decided to play around laughing very loudly, like he was like us, man or something and Brad was in his room, crying and their dad decided that Brad needed to share his friends and said that he prefers the way Kenneth did things, Brad got really angry and started to be totally mental, by punching Kenneth like a ******, as well as threatening to **** the father that gave him a perfect life as a kid, of course he didn't **** him, but he was an angry *******, you see he was the board games king, while his brother was a computer **** kid, and Kenneth tried to not hurt Brad's feelings, even though, being a kid, he found it hard to not teaee the ****** and Bradley was put in a special school where he made a few new friends, but they weren't into playing board games or anything else with him, they wanted to teaee him, with teachers joining in, because Bradley needed to learn about how to control is temper, and someone tried to bully him, and Bradley stood up to him, and another guy was determined to tease Bradley also, but as he tried to punch Bradley put his hands on his **** and squeezed his ***** real tight, and since then everyone liked Bradley, but not to his dads liking the little cool kid to his dad was suddenly Kenneth,,and Bradley felt he was trying to tease Kenneth the same way, and see how he likes it, but all his friends like Kenneth better, and Bradley punched Kenneth in the gut and his friends thought Bradley was a **** and left the house and another girl at school was making fun of Brads parents and Brad tried to stand up to her,but she said, they never helped me,**** kids town and ******* early to bed and early to rise baby, and Bradley got really upset and from that moment the only young ones who like him were the rougher ones, who hassled Bradley for money,and Bradey became to shy to say no. Which made him a little young dude with no friends, he had family trying to contact him, but he was determined to make their lives a misery.
Bradley was an idiot, with his drinking and teasing and punching people, yes dude, he needs anger management, and he needs it now, but you must want to go, but Bradley made a pact, that he won't get help till Kenneth found a girl and got married and has kids,,so his thought of being teased all through his adult years, wasn't going to happen, and Kenneth married Bridgett Kingsley and they had Toni and Ros, yes, Bradley's little nieces, and he loved them dearly, and the bonding of Bradley and Kenneth grew fondly, while their parents had the old Brad back, he ain't married but he's happy, and that's what Counts in life.
YOU SEE I ONCE PREFERRED TO BE A HOOLIGAN, TO AVOID GETTING TEASED



YOU SEE YOU SHOULDN’T DO THE CRIME, IF YOU CAN’T DO THE TIME

YOU SEE I SHOULDN’T TREAT ME LIKE A KIDNAPPER OR HOOLIGAN IF YOUR NOT PREPARED TP MUCK FAMILY FOR ME

YOU SEE PLAYING COOL FOR FAMILY PEOPLE WITH A FEAR OF THEM TEASING YA

AND MY ONLY SOLACE OS TO BE A HOOLIGAN, SAYING, YOU ARE A LITTLE FAMILY KID

TEASING THE COOL HOOLIGAN IN ME, YOU DO WOOSEY FAMILY GAMES

WHILE I PLAY WITH THE BIG DUDES BY THROWING BEER BOTTLES ON SCHOOL ROOVES’

YOU SEE I LIKED THE SOLACE OF A HOOLIGAN, BECAUSE I WAS BEING PROTECTED

FROM BEING TREATED LIKE A WOOSEY FAMILY KID, BEING A WOOSEY IN EVERY STRETCH OF THE IMAGINATION

I WANTED REALLY TO BE A BIG FAMILY PERSON, BUT THEY CAN’T UNDERSTAND

THAT I DON’T WANT TO BE A LOSER, MAN, I WANT TO BE A HOOLIGAN, CAUSE, I THREW BEER CANS ON ROOVES, MAN I’M COOL

AND CRACKING BOTTLES OF BEER ON THE ROADS, MAN I’M COOL

I WAS A BIT OF A TEASER IN THE CLUB, MAN I’M COOL

YOU SEE I GO OUT TO BIG NYE RAVES, WHILE MY YOUNG MATE GROWS UP TO QUICKLY, MAN I’M COOL

I PLAY COOL FOR FAMILY KIDS PLAYING WITH THEIR FAMILIES, MAN I’M COOL

I STOLE A HAT FROM GRACE BROTHERS, MAN I’M COOL

I TEASED MY DADDY, ONLY BECAUSE NO MATTER HOW MUCH MY DAD CARED FOR ME

I NEVER UNDERSTOOD HIS PARENTING SKILLS, HE WAS A GOOD DAD, I NEVER UNDERSTOOD IT, SO I SAID TO MYSELF

YOU NEVER TEASE A SON OR DAUGHTER, UNLESS YOUR SON OR DAUGHTER CAN HANDLE IT

YOU SEE DAD WAS TEASING ME, BUT I THOUGHT SAYING I WAS A HOOLIGAN GETS RID OF THIS AWFUL TEASING

I KNOW DAD, WASN’T REALLY TEASING ME, HE THOUGHT I WAS LOVING BAD THINGS

BUT TELLING ME TO EAT NICELY OR CALLING ME A FOOL, DOESN’T DO ANYTHING

OR LAIGHING AT ME DOESN’T WORK EITHER, HE IS SUPPOSED TO BE A DAD,

BUT I LOOKED AT HIM AT BEING A AWFUL TEASER, FINE, I MIGHT NOT LOOK STRONG, BUT THIS CAN HYPE PEOPLE UP

I LIKED HOW DAD, STOPPED THESE STUPID SITUATIONS, I HATED ME AND DADS LITTLE FIGHTS

I WAS TRYING TO DEFEND MYSELF, I DON’T WANT TP LIVE IN CANBERRA IF I HAD ENOUGH MONEY

TO LIVE ANYWHERE ELSE, I DON’T WANT TO GO TO THE DENTIST, I HATE BEING TREATED LIKE A FIST FIGHTER

I AM A LIFE FIGHTER, I AM PREPARED TO RIDE AROUND ON A SCOOTER, RATHER THAN DIE, SHY

NOTHING CAN **** BRIAN ALLAN, I WILL FIGHT FOR LIFE, CAUSE I LOVE LIFE, I LIVE LIFE LIKE IT’S ONE BIG ADVENTURE

I KNOW DAD CARED, BUT, REALLY, WHETHER I CAN FIGHT OR NOT LAUGHING AT SOMEONE WHO IS POOR IS NOT CALLED FOR BAZ BOY

I DON’T LIKE FIGHTING USING FISTS, THAT IS FOR LOSERS OR PEOPLE WHO ARE HAVING PROBLENS

I WANTED TO CHANGE DAD, CAUSE HE WAS MY DAD, I UNDERSTAND MY BROTHER AND MATES

BUT I CAN’T UNDERSTAND DAD, HE WASN’T REALLY SYMPETHEDIC TO MY NEEDS AS A DRUNK

AND I HATED THE VOICE, MY BROTHER WAS LIKE DAD, AND I AM TOO WOOSEY TO BE LIKE DAD

UNLESS YOU TELL WHAT YOUR PROBLEM WAS, WELL I’LL TELL YA

MY PROBLEM WAS, I HATED HOW DAD, WANTED TO TEASE WITH THE ADULTS

YOU SEE, I PUNCHED HIM, SOMETIMES SO VERY HARD, I HATED BEING TREATED LIKE An IDIOT

OR A LITTLE WOOSEY FOR LIFE, DAD TRIED TO HELP ME, BUT BECAUSE MY BROTHER REALLY HELPED DAD GET HIS WAY A BIT

I NEVER WAS GOOD ENOUGH TO DAD, AS LONG AS I WORKED AND NEVER COMPLAINED, DAD IS HAPPY

BUT AS SOON AS I STARTED TO BREAK THE FAMILY CODE, DAD SAID YOUR STILL A LITTLE SHY BOY, BRIAN

YOU SEE I HATED BEING TREATED LIKE A LITTLE SHY BOY OR A LITTLE WOOSEY

DAD SEEMS TO LOVE TEASING PEOPLE WHO HAS PROBLEMS WITH  VOICES

AND I WAS TRYING TO TALK TO DAD AND MUM, AND THEY SPENT THE WHOLE TIME PLAYING WITH THEIR FUCKEN MOBILE PHONES

AND I SAID CAN YOU PLEASE STOP, HOW WOULD DAD FEEL IF I DID THAT TO HIM, I DID DAD HATED IT, LIKE WHEN I ACCEPTED BEING A SLOB

YEAH I AM NOW FEELING HAPPY ABOUT BEING A SLOB, AFTER DAD, DECIDED TO PLAY WITH HIS MOBILE PHONE

LIKE THE RICH ARROGANT DUDE HE WAS, HE NEVER SEEMED TO UNDERSTAND ME. I DIDN’T AS FOR FUCKEN SCHITZOPHRENIA, ****

AND DAD IMPLIED HE ONLY PREFERS THE PEOPLE WHO ARE COOL, IF THE PERSON, HAD MOJO ISSUES, DAD LOOKED DOWN ON THEM

MAKING THEM FEEL LIKE A LOSER, I TOLD DAD, YOUR A LOSER, YOU ONLY LIKE CHRIS, YOU TOLERATE ME CAUSE I AM YOUR SON

I MIGHT HAVE FUCKEN SCHITZOPHRENIA, AND I WILL NEVER BE EVER AS COOL AS YOUR PRECIOUS CHRIS

I KNOW, YOU CARED FOR US, IN THE SMALL PICTURE, BUT WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME MOVING TO ADELAIDE ONE DAY

I WANTED TO GET AWAY FROM MY PARENTS, CAUSE I AM NOT LIKE THE ****, WHO SUPPORT PARENTAL RIGHTS

MAYBE THAT IS WHY I AM NOT A PARENT MYSELF, DAD, NEVER LOOKED AT ME AS BEING A COOL PERSON

I HAD TO FUCKEN BEHAVE, I DON’T DO BEHAVING, I DO PARTYING

MUM AND DAD HATED ME TELLING THEM MY NAME AT THAT NYE CONCERT IN MERIMBULA

BUT I DID THAT, ON THE OFF CHANCE, I CAN BE FAMOUS, THE MESSIAH SAID, ALL PARENTS ARE LIKE THAT

WORRYING AND WORRYING, LIKE A PACK OF MOTHER HEN’S

I CAN’T HELP IT, IF I LIKED HOW THEY ACTED, AROUND THE TIMES WE FIGHTED, THEY WERE COOL THEN

PLEASE *******, I DON’T WANT TO FIGHT MY MUM NOW, SHE DOESN’T WANT TO BE LITTLE COOL

LIKE SITTING ON THE COUCH, THAT IS WHY I NEED TO BE REFORMED

UMMMMMMM REFORM BRIAN ALLAN   UMMMMMMMMMM BRIAN ALLAN IS NOW REFORMED

WELL, NOT YET, BUT, I WANT TO RID STUPID VOICES, OF EVERYONE TREATING ME LIKE A BABY

TO FUCKEN LEAVE MY HEAD, I DON’T WANT TO BE A BABY, I AM A GROWN UP, WHO IS CREATIVE

UMMMMMMMMM    I AM A CREATIVE ADULT  UMMMMMMMM I DON’T WANT TO BE TOUGHENED UP

UMMMMMMMMM I AM A ARTIST AND A WRITER AND A YOUTUBE ****** AND ENTERTAINER

UMMMMMMMMMM I AM A CREATIVE ADULT, TO GROW UP TO BE COOL, MAN

I HATED DAD TREATING ME LIKE A LITTLE YEAH MATE YEAH KID, AND I HATED PAT DOING THAT TOO

BUT UMMMMMMMMM THE ONLY ADULT I AM IS A CREATIVE ADULT, DUDES, I AM A CREATIVE MAN UMMMMMMMMMM

AND 1 2 3 4 DO THE SCHITZOPHRENIC, JUST BECAUSE YOU WORK DOESN’T MEAN YOUR NICE

YOU SEE WITH MEDICATION I CAN BE NICE, OH YEAH MATE YEAH, I AM SCHITZOPHRENIC

1 2 3 4 DO THE SCHITZOPHRENIC, I WANNA PARTY, LET ME HANG OUT

THE MEDICATION I TAKE, CAN REALLY REFORM ME, OH YEAH MATE YEAH I AM SCHITZOPHRENIC AND PROUD OF IT

YOU SEE, I HATE BEING TREATED LIKE A CRAZY COWARD, CAUSE I AM NOT A COWARD, I AM A FAMILY PERSON

WHO LOVES LIFE, AND LIVES LIFE TO THE FULL

I LIVE LIFE LIKE IT’S ONE BIG ADVENTURE, AND I HELP PEOPLE ONE BY ONE, THE BUDDHIST WAY, EVERY BLADE OF GRASS

I AM THE COOLEST DUDE IN CANBERRA, WHO HAS SCHITZOPHRENIA

ONLY RICH ARROGANT WITH NO REGARD FOR POOR MAN WELFARE WOULD TEASE ME

CAUSE I HELP POOR PEOPLE, DUDE, I AM POOR, BUT I AM PLANNING A TRIP TO ADELAIDE FOR NEXT YEARS NEW YEARS

I CAN’T CHANGE PEOPLE BUT I CAN CHANGE THEIR OPINIONS OF ME, I AM COOL, NOT SHY, OK ****

WITH THESE PROBS, YOU UNDERSTAND WHY I WANTED TO BE A HOODLUM, OK
The ballad of a drunken yobho


You see he will go to the club, to watch the match
And he'll start to cheer with te guys
He will make the blokes who support the other team angry
But as long as his team wins, it's ok
And then suddenly from out of the blue
Their team comes back with two great goals, to get it within 3
And he said, we are still in front
And,mate, we have only 2 minutes to go, ya wamker
And suddenly a fight broke out, ***** v *****
And suddenly their wives entered having a girls night down the pub
And I pulled out and they called me a wimp
But I wanted to have good *** and also
Concentrate on keeping a tag on my team
And they still caled me a wimp and suddenly from
Out of the blue, his team won, and I wondered why
And I blamed the referee for a push in the back
But it wasn't, so I pushed my friend in the back
And he went head over turkey into the girls night out
And my girl yelled and I said, sorry, but he was beginning to buy me
He hates our team and he is the reason for them losing
He fixed the game, love he fixes games
That's what he does, he really doesn't but
I wanted calming down *** tonight, so I don't care
And If that makes me a yobho
I am a ***** and I am proud of it
briano alliano performs on venus party trap




oh yeah, bow bow come on and party on, oh yeah

get down and party and listen to everyone saying hey dudes lets party on

move on toward the next day, partying is so much fun

we get out the methane smoothies and spray it all over the dead up here

you see if you are sitting in the bedroom feeling like a hooligan

just go to bed and join me in the venus party trap and sing

we wish you a merry christmas we wish you a merry christmas

we wish you a merry christmas from everyone here

you see the videos on youtube a crackling up, but it sometimes shows a good effect

like it keeps pausing and you see the picture looking fantastic, oh yeah bow bow

you see people drinking alcohol very slowly, oh yeah, dude

you see i am a family person who loves to party, party party won’t stardy

move me, oh yeah won’t you move me

i watch all sorts of shows on youtube like entertaining christmas tree lighting ceremonies

and i try and watch stop start halloween parades on youtube, it’s got a good effect

and that is the methane dripping down on brian allan’s computer

you see i feel like someone is trying to keep with the young dudes

despite me liking what i had when i was a kid

i liked when young dudes would show me a picture, and slow it up and blow it up

and that is the reason why computers break up, but it looks cool

and then a voice comes up and says your just as messed up as the rest of us brian allan


and now here is another song titled let it shine, a copy of the christmas song let it snow

the weather outside is wonderful and the sun is so cool, yeah

and i don’t know which way oh yeah, let it shine let it shine let it shine

the bbq is slowly dying and the firemen says we have a fire ban

yeah we could blame the sun, instead we go let it shine let it shine let it shine

santa swimming in the beach enjoying his life yeah, oh yeah he hates leaving the sea yeah

the kids are enjoying santa swimming in the surf but they want santa to deliver his presents everywhere

and the men lift their beers and say, let it shine let it shine let it shine

we finally entered the pub, you see santa was there saying it’s too hot to go out in the sun

and then some drinkers came up to him and said, you must go out cause the kids are waiting for you

so santa finally left the pub and went out to every computer in the land delivering presents to everyone

and one family in kalgoorlie decided to leave santa a nice cream bun

and as santa did his run, he said let it shine let it shine let it shine

you see he flew all over Australia dude saying ** ** ** to you and as the sun was going

the sun was gone and despite us wanting it to shine, dudes, it wouldn’t and afterwards he delivered his presents

saying GOODBYE AUSTRALIA, i enjoyed swimming in your pools, oh yeah

ok, dudes and now here is another song titled i was a hooligan but not anymore

you see i went out and destroyed the earth and touched up people yeah i was bad

i want to get reformed, but i hear voices from people saying they don’t want me to get reformed

i know my old mates say my beard doesn’t suit me, but it does suit me

it makes me look like a writer and artist and it makes me enjoy my life oh yeseree

you see i love the idea of drinking and i love the idea of destroying lives of old conservos, kick ‘em up the ***

i want these voices to go, but instead i get ***** trying to get rid of the parties next door

i said, you idiot, i want my voices that only i can hear out of my head, yeah i am schizophrenia

i want to hear parties next door, to drown out the voices in my head

but there is another way, i need to relax and take my medication

and sing away in a manger no crib for a bed the little lord buddha lays down his sweet head

the stars in the bright sky look down where he lays, the little lord buddha asleep on the hay

and that means buddha is a reincarnation of jesus

and then we sing silent night holy night all is calm and all is bright

round yon ****** mother and child, holy infant tender and mild

sleep in nirvanly peace man, sleep in nirvanly peace

and after my medication gets rid of all angry thoughts and angry feelings

yeah maybe showing me the little girl that the boys were protecting me from

mainly because i am not a little girl, i am a man, but i don’t want to be an angry man

a ray of hope glitters into the light and a glimse of buddha shining into the night

and that is when  a child is born

jingle bells jingle bells jingle all the way

oh what fun it is to ride in a one horse open sleigh

jingle bells bat man smells robin laid an egg

the bat mobile lost it’s wheel, the joker got away

you see people think i hated my life in the 80s, i HATED THE TEASING I HATE HOW PEOPLE THINK I PREFER TO DO NOTHING

I LIKE DOING STUFF, i hate how people thought i never liked being creative, i love it

ok dudes, now it’s time to go, goooooodbye
1.5k · Mar 2019
HEY CARDINAL PEL
Hey cardinal pel
You know what you did is dispickable
You think you should get off
Hey cardinal pel
You spoil the good name of the church
If they have a good name to begin with
Hey cardinal pel
You might be old but you are where you belong
But you should have got longer
Hey cardinal pel
There is no way known to man
That you should be allowed to
Walk the streets
You know I watched your sentence
And you show no remorse
Well I am just happy you are rotting in a jail cell
Hey cardinal pel
****** acts toward children is wrong
Very wrong indeed
Hey cardinal pel
You could be risking being killed in jail
Knowing what they do to child *** offenders
Hey cardinal pel
Walking the streets is too good for you and there is no way I will change
The judges decision except for giving you more time
Hey cardinal pel
You might have not reoffended but
You still should be where you are
God will hunt you down
And send you to hell
And Buddha will make you a slow elephant or a suffering dog for
What you put those children through
Hey cardinal pel hey cardinal pel
Hey cardinal pel
You are where you belong
Don’t deny it
1.5k · Aug 2018
brian allan is a punk
Brian Allan is a punk
A punk a punk
Brian Allan is a punk
Who is so cool
You see I watch concerts
Cause I love them I love them
Brian Allan is a punk
And is the coolest dude around
You see watches Sydney swans in the footy and supports the raiders despite them only winning when they have no hope
Brian Allan is a punk a punk a punk
Yes Brian Allan is a punk
And he is so cool
You see he likes watching boxing to see who will win the title and if a geeky kid was being bullied he would come up to hassle the bully
Only to get locked in the locker next to the geek
You see Brian Allan is a punk
A very fine punk is he
He never gets into very much
Strife and dude can he be cool
You see Brian Allan gets wasted at parties turning the people away but deep down Brian Allan is a cool punk who really loves life in the way of being positive
Not worrying about the bad
Just stay positive in your life
the coopers family, the case of torette syndrome




michelle met young rudy rometon, who was really hard to look after, every time micheele turned her

back rudy will hold a plastic knife toward another patient of the psych ward, because she is really

psychotic, and michelle couldn’t handle her on her own, so she asked sally to help her, and sally

said, yeah, because if we have to help this girl get help we can’t push her away, but the only

problem with rudy is, she feeds the staff with these ridiculous jellyfish lies, that she was kidnapped

by the mafia, and her father was the head honcho and michelle then said, i read about the mafia

and your dad isn’t one, but rudy would get really aggressive on the psych ward medical staff, and

sally took rudy into the room to let her have a yelling match and she yelled out

YOU FUCKEN STUPID ****, MY MOTHER PROMISED ME A TRIP TO WARNER BROS MOVIE WORLD

AND THEN SHE FUCKEN WENT BACK ON HER FUCKEN WORD, SHE ALSO SAID I COULD BE

A BEAUTIFUL MODEL,AND THEN SHE FUCKEN WENT BEHIND MY BACK, AND SAID RUDY, ISN’T

FULLY EQUIPPED, and sally stopped her by saying, with being famous and rudy said, LET ME FUCKEN SPEAK

sally was distraught and felt threatened as she tried to listen, YEAH, SHUT UP, THAT STUPID TWO FACED MOLE

DECIDED TO LOCK ME UP EVERY TIME I WAS TRYING TO ACHIEVE MY DREAMS, I WANT HER TO STOP

BUT SHE WON’T LEAVE ME ALONE, YOU SEE SALLY COOPER, I HAVE BEEN HAVING PROBLEMS, TRYING TO DEAL

WITH MY FUCKEN PROBLEMS IN MY BRAIN, from that moment, sally took rudy in for a brainscan, to see if there

is any sign of mental illness, and rudy didn’t want the brain scan, only because she was too defensives when someone says

she is a mental head and then as david was entering to check on rudy, rudy got her plastic knife, and threatened david, if

she wasn’t allowed to go, david, wasn’t in the losing mood and tripped rudy up and locked her in the solitary cell, saying

i bet you prefer to be here, rather than the streets, cause your mum wants time, cause she can’t except you at the moment

rudy yelled blue ******, saying WHY DON’T YOU FIND A FUCKEN WAY TO GET ME OUT OF THIS DUMP, and david said

if you want tp be free, you must behave yourself, because at present you are menace, menace i tell ya, and meanwhile

at the coopers family clinic john prendth was dealing with a patient who has bulimia, and she was skinny, and this made john

want to get a referral for her to go to a food abnormalities centre, where they only monitor you what you eat, well john was having

problems with her conversation patterns, from positive and negative positive and negative, which made john think there is a little

bit of mental illness, but her brain scan showed nothing, but to be on the safe side, john took a picture of the brain, just to make sure

that there isn’t anything small, and instead of being with sue and frank at dinner, he spent 4 hours looking for abnormalities from the

scan, which shows nothing, and then john noticed a tumor growing, at present it is alright, but it looks like those kind of tumors that

could do more harm if not removed early, so the next day, as david brought the morning medications for rudy and also the breakfasts

for the impatients of the psych ward, john phoned her bellmic patient to come and discuss her results and she vomited in her toilet every

hour on the hour, she was cranky, and finding out she has a tumor, made her more furious, and she said, i want that tumor out of fucken me

right now, while sally was given new words but same guidelines, that her mum is a two faced marta ****, and sally said, here take these ******

because you need to calm down, because, what you are doing is not right, these inpatients are sick, they don’t want some bratty teenager like you

putting plastic knives to their arms and then martin came out and said, why you young ****, get off ya ****, and into work, mind you, sally spent all day

with rudy, because at 3 in the afternoon she was diagnosed with torette syndrome and rudy yelled every swear word under the sun

and the staff said, yeah, you are swearing and you get ticks, david said that you have terretz, ok, rudy yelled and went into her room while the

nurses got the medication, and decided on clonidine, 2 tablets at night and one dexedine in the morning, but david still wanted to monitor rudy

here in his psych ward, cause she has a violent temper, and at the end of that day david, ron and john and sue went to sing leonard cohen’s

halleuiah, in a very awful voice, plus david and jean and jack were telling jokes of their past, while rudy and john’s bulimic patient with a tumor

were understanding, but rudy hit michele and sally a few times, but all in a days work

the end
PARTY PARTY PARTY

THE MUSIC IS SWEET, AND VERY VERY COOL
YA SEE IT'S VEG OUT MUSIC TRUE AND TRUE
STARSHIPS ARE MEANT TO FLY
SO HIGH TO TOUCH THE SKY
**** ALL YA WANT **** ALL YA LIKE
AND WE PARTY WITH THIS MUSIC CAUSE IT'S REALLY REALLY COOL
OH YEAH, SHAKE YOUR THANG BUDDY
SHAKE IT ****** RIGHT
SHAKE IT IN THE MORNING, AND INTO THE NIGHT
PARTY, UP AND PARTY DOWN
YEAH SHOW EACH SQUAREHEAD WHO LETS OUT A FROWN
THEN TAKE THIS MUSIC TO THE DANCEFLOOR
AND GET A BOURBON AND COKE, AND ***** AND SCOTCH
YEAH THIS SOUNDS REALLY RAD
PARTY PARTY PARTY
INTO COSMIC DREAMING, YEAH MATE YEAH
COME ON MEN TRY AND STEAL MY BEER
I THINK YOU CAN OPEN THE LID BY USING YA EAR
COME ON PARTY PEOPLE TRY A NICE COLD BEER
THEN HEAD DOWN TO THE FAMOUS NIGHT CLUB
HEAR THE BIG BAND SINGING THE XM,AS CAROL
RUPPA PUM PUM
COME THEY TOLD ME, YOU ARE THE OLD ME, STUPID VOICE OF OLD MATE
THE OLD ME, PLAYING COOL FOR MY FATHER, LIKE A DRINKING BOOZING
YOUNG DUDE DOES
I BIT THE TOP OF THE COKE CAN, MAN
AS I HEARD STARSHIPS FLYING IN THE SKY
I YELLED BRIAN, MAKES STARSHIPS REALLY FLY, OH YEAH
SO MUCH, IN FACT THEY'LL HIT THE SKY
BRIAN HAS THE POWER TO LIFT UP A STARSHIP NOW
THEN I SANG THE WORDS OH YEAH, BOW BOW
PARTY PARTY PARTY
I DRINK A COCA COLA SO STRAIGHT
CAUSE ALCOHOL DIDN'T WORK FOR ME
I KNOW I COULD'VE SAID NO, BUT IF I SAID NO
I WOULDN'T KNOWN IF THEY WERE BAD FOR ME, NOW WOULD I
I PARTY PARTY PARTY THROUGH THE STREETS OF CANBERRA TOWN
OH CANBERRA TOWN IN SUMMER IS VERY HUMID
OH YEAH CANBERRA TOWN, CAN CHANGE THE WEATHER
WHEN ONE MINUTE IT'S HUMID THE NEXT IT'S ICE COLD RAIN
AND THIS RAIN ONLY LASTS 5 MINUTES AND IT'S ****** HUMID AGAIN
OH YEAH CANBERRA TOWN, WILL STAY HOT IN JANUARY AND FEBRUARY
OH YEAH WE ALL FEEL LIKE A COLD DRINK IT'S SO FUN
TO PARTY IN THE HEAT OF CANBERRA TOWN
AND WE'LL PARTY PARTY PARTY ALL YEAR LONG
HAVE A NICE COLD BEER TO MY GREAT MATE BRIAN
Traveling around Queensland



You see in October in 2002, Brian Allan went on a trip to Queensland with pipeline, where
The bus came right to Brian's door and there was heaps of picnic food, and there was this lady
Named Janet, who was a bit of a larrikin, and Kelly, who was a very nice lady, and then there was Richard, who tried to steal my book, but, in theory, I never kept it due to my mental breakdown, but that was a fun trip, you see we travelled up to Hervey Bay where we went to a museum aquarium, yeah that was cool, and I took some great pictures of the group I went with
And I really participated in the objects of that museum, and then we went whale watching, and that was really really cool, I also remember, doing a bit of Dolphin watching, and also, I took a photo of myself in the captain's seat, and we had a banquet meal aboard that boat, boy it's like the boat at bateman's bay,, but more exotic, and, I moved all around the boat trying to get pictures of the whales and other things, and yes, this was cool, and, one of the older people on the tour I went on had a crush on me, and I thought, she is way to old for me, but, I wanted to be nice, ok, and then as the boat went over each whale, it went rumpita rumpita rumpita
And all the people on the boat, including myself were walking from deck to deck taking photos, as this was the only time we would see whales on this Queensland coast, and then, yes, the boat trip was finished, and we all went off and went home and then Richard was tired and wanted me to get the milk for breakfast, and I didn't and he stole my writing book, because I was ******* him off, but I wrote a Poem called I don't want to be a stalker, and despite me and Richard wanting the same thing, why can't he ask, why me, and then we all had tea, and went to bed, and the next day, we went to feed the seal, and matey oh this was great and I enjoyed as you hold the piece of fish out and the seal jumps up and grabs the fish, oh this was ever so much fun, and I had 3 Goes, I think, but it could've been more, maybe less, but it was fun, and
I can tell you, the seal was having a great time as well, and I took a few photos of the seal as well as we made a movie about it, but through years and years of my mental breakdown I might have wrecked that, but it was a video anyway, and I haven't got a VCR anymore, anyway, but
I don't think I threw out the photographs on the trip, which is great, and after we left Hervey Bay, we went to the Gold Coast, and all the dreams I had about the Gold Coast, first of all we went to Warner brothers movie world, and mate, I felt like I was in the USA and as I watched the police academy cars,yeah cool, and there were a lot of rides we went on, yeah, I just walked around the theme park, buying things in the movie playground, and buying souvenirs, and talking to some of the tourists, and I spoke to a lot of the people from our trip, as I walked around with Kelly and Steve ambrose, and then at the end of this day at the theme park, a bad
Thing happened in Bali, which was the Bali bombings and Tom and Steve who were my room mates were watching the whole boring news event the whole day, as this was a relax and chill day, me and Steve went for a walk, while Steve wanted to live down here, and said, hey, mate
Have ya got any jobs, going, in a real Australian way, and then the trip leader Joel took us on a walk down to surfers paradise, and I ****** in the water, because fish do it, why can't we, well
This was a real relaxing day, and then they bought our meals in, and if I can remember, it was
Fish and chips, with prawns and so on , well this was ever so tasty, I loved it, and then we went to bed, for the next day was interesting, you see, the next day, we will go to currimbin animal
Sanctuary, where we held snakes, and we looked as bold as the big bold eagle, and there were a lot of wildlife, there and I took a lot of photos there, it was radically awesome, and Queensland is the cleanest state in Australia, the seas are cleaner and green, while no, really disgusting seaweed ever existed and, mate, yeah really clean, after that we headed back to our motel, and we watched the football, Australia won, and Tom was showing is patriotism by standing up with his hand on his chest, to the national anthem, and me and Steve and Kelly
Went for a dip in the pool, and Richard who because I spoke up to him, he really liked the way I was ever so cool, and then we went back to our rooms and waited for our next meal, which was
Home made spaghetti  bolognaise and this was made ya know ever so tasty, and Jason  and Joel cooked it, one *** of it to every room, about 3 in total, and I don't know about other rooms, but my room really loved it, yeah, the best spag boll in the country cooked by Jason and Joel, and
Then after about 2 hours, we went to bed, and the next day, we went home and we stopped over at Coffs Harbour and at night, we bought pizzas, for each of us, and James and Kelly joel and myself were driven home by Joel, and we fell asleep after watching our last nights TV
And we went for a Sydney bypass which meant, in about 6 hours we were all home and that was the end of a great trip, and I went to my play rehearsal for urban dreaming that night, and
Despite my parents saying I will be too tired for that, it was just a watching the other theatre performance that was on, which was cool, man, and I really loved the holiday, for it brought me some happy memories, the end


Sent from my iPad
1.5k · Mar 2015
my funtimes as a kid, dudes
You see after all i my mates laughed at me for being a little ****** kid

there was one friend called lyle who wanted to be my friend at school

and i at that time, thought this friend was cool, seeing i knew nobody else

but we had fun together, like a dream made me understand,that we used

to play basketball at the local courts which i thought was cool, and it would’ve

been nice, if my other school mates would join in, but we did play games

with other kids who dropped in, i just had a dream, where my mate the messiah

came in and taught me how to become respected enough to make it to hollywood

and before you say it, i know he isn’t my daddy, but i was a daddy figure to him

letting him stay at my house, you see we went to the movies and top floriade

and also to the national multi cultural festival, and the messiah said, instead of

shop food, how about you have multi cultural food, yeah, it’s tasty, hey, we also

went to each others houses, i had him sleep over, but i never slept over there,

mainly because, i have caused a lot of problems expecting to sleep over in my childhood

you see lyle came in my dream last night to show me the ***** cool kid, in the form of the messiah

he made the messiah, buy all these tickets to expensive events, like maybe a soccer game

between barcelona and ajax, yeah i used to joke with him, and we saw a stand up comedy event, and we find

that kind of thing very funny, but i heard the witch doctor who killed my previous life patrick dunbar

saying, hang on, are you the guy from the charnwood inn, and he told men to shut up, and i said

leave me alone, i am a family person, i don’t need the crazy demented witch doctor kidnapping my cool kid

the witch doctor, is trying to steal my mate patricks voice saying, i am not a cool kid, to make me too scared

and i really wanted a mate, and lyle was the only young bloke who gave a ****, like take me to bet on the footy

once we turned 18, but in school, we went to the footy and going over to each other’s houses, to play cricket or footy, and mate

lyle was a really big wild boy, he was, ya know a fast bowler and a tough footballer, and i tried to keep fit, so i can

outclass him, and i think i succeeded, but ya know, if you ******* a mate like lyle, he will get cranky, cause he has a

problem worth anger, we also slept in the backyard tent, where lyle said, i ain’t scared of the old boogie woman

but, i was wanting cool friends, as he liked the idea of going to bed early, and my family and lyles family all got together

and talked to each other, and i enjoyed my conversations with lyles mum, mind you, there were moments, where i was

scared to go over, because, i feel if i **** people off, i will have no friends, i remember me and lyle used to be big eaters

but, i don’t want to eat like that no more, because, i don’t want any blood clot, mind you i still eat a lot, but i write and do art

because i need to do things with my art, so my eating doesn’t get the better of me, there is more to brian allan than eating

too much, me and lyle were like two cool people playing bingo, and that was cool, you see,in my dream, my mum packed

a whole case of cakes, for me to share with all the young dudes at the festival, but the messiah felt uneasy and said i don’t want

to be a kid, he said he wants to fucken grow up, but i can’t understand why, he is telling me to grow up, and i hate the idea

of being treated like i am trying to be like other people, like my brother, i am like brian, just me, brian allan, i had fun with lyle

despite him being a loud mouth wild person who liked the idea of picking fights with everyone, but i have to understand

i ******* a lot of people, but this dream shows, all the fun times, i did a horrible crime, but i still think that it was my belief

of being greame thorne and pastrick diunbar in my previous life, being taken too young, was the reason of all my crazy person crimes

and dad couldn’t except i had a mental illness, and either can my old school mates, you see i ignored patrick at the st george bank

in the mall, and i heard him say get ****** brainy, like he was worried, why isn’t brian talking to me, and i said to pat, hi pat and

patrick went sarcastically hi brian, your brother isn’t around anymore, brian, we don’t have to be nice to you, i had fun with patrick

and lyle as well, in the new years eve concert to end the 1980s, me patrick and lyle went to the belconnen soccer club for the

end of the 80s nye party, and me and patrick and lyle had a few XXXX’s, and i got drunk and crashed over patricks house

and i crashed over patricks house, too much, patrick got sick of the fucken sight of me, i can understand in hindsight, that

i ****** him off, so i annoyed the mall crowd, and i was invited to a party, but because of the party i had at my house, where

my dad played taxi driver to all my drunken mates, and i wasn’t really a good host, because, i prefer the laid back lifestyle

partying out in the firehouse nightclub and the private bin in front of youtube, and i would love a televised youtube nye bash

on youtube, but they don’t, so i made my own nye bash, and it was pretty radically successful as well, i have still got my cool

jeans on, from those days, but i am a talented entertainer and actor now, and as much fun as i had with patrick and lyle,

those days are in the past, i am moving on now,

my granny took me to bingo too, my nanny watched the end of the 70s nye concert with me

i remember when jimmy barnes through beer cans at a concert at alberton oval, adelaide

yeah, totally radical dudes
i am a partying in the street ya know

i have got my chips and coca cola that is radical

i want to be happy don’t you ******* know

steve and bill and doff and jill went up the hill

to try to catch a party spirit and really party on

i liked thew mates i had when i was young

they are pretty cool, but i am moving on

and so should they

yeah that is the way of the world

i hate tony abbott that is my opinion, please don’t lock me away

he is just a loser can’t ya see

everyone is partying in the clubs ya see

so mr conservo, get out iof this place

for i am the man to boot you out on your *** mr abbott

everyone says party party party and forget about the little smarty

who come in your life, ***** with your wife

yeah partying is more fun than that yeah,

i wanna rock and roll all night, and drink every day, a bottle of coke

and don’t you doff it down for you to choke

party party party get down and ****** party dudes

let’s get on with the show, even if it shows

partying is fun for people of all ages, yeah mate yeah
YOU GOTTA HAVE A BEER ON AUSTRALIA DAY, MATEY



HI DUDES, IT’S JANUARY 26TH, AND WE MUST CELEBRATE

THE DAY WE WERE INVADED BY CONVICTS, YA SEE MATE

WE ALL LIVE IN THE CONVICT COLONY, THE CONVICT COLONY THE CONVICT COLONY

AND BECAUSE OF THAT IT’S IN OUR CULTURE TO DRINK

JUST LIKE I DID, I HEAR MATES SAYING, YOU GOTTA HAVE A BEER FOR AUSTRALIA DAY, WHY

WHAT IS WRONG WITH COKE, COKE IS FROM AUSTRALIA

AND THE MEN SAID, WE MUST DRINK BEER, WE MUST DRINK BEER

WE ARE DESCENDANT FROM CONVICTS, AND IT’S IN OUR CULTURE TO DRINK

WE LIVE IN THE CONVICT COLONY

OH YEAH, BOW BOW, WE DRINK EVERY BEER UNDER THE TABLE, AND GET BLIND

YEAHH GET WASTED, MAN, WASTED, MAN

AND THEN COOK A BEAUTIFUL LAMB CHOP ON THE BBQ, DUDES

YEAH IT SOUNDS RADICAL, SO RADICAL, LIVING IN AUSTRALIA, WITH A CAN OF BEER AND A NICE LAMB

EXCUSE ME EXCUSE ME, THERE ARE 2 LAMBS HERE

YEAH, IF THEY ARE BOTHERING YA, WE’LL HAVE ‘EM REMOVED

WE ALL LIVE IN THE CONVICT COLONY, THE CONVICT COLONY

THE ONLY REASON I LIKE AUSTRALIA DAY IF, IS THE NICE AUSTRALIA DAY BBQ BREAKFAST AT COMMONWEALTH PARK, IT SOUNDS SO RAD

AUSTRALIANS DRINK THEIR BEER, AND PROUD TO DRINK THEIR BEER

GET BLIND AND END UP IN THE DITCH, I LIKE HOW AUSTRALIANS PARTY ON AUSTRALIA DAY, IT’S COOL

BUT THEN THEY STILL THINK IT’S COOL TO DRIVE HOME DRUNK, NO IT’S NOT COOL TO DRIVE HOME DRUNK

BUDDHA DOESN’T APPROVE OF DRINKING LOUTS, EITHER DOES CRONUS, WHO IS ME

NO, I BELIEVE IN A GOOD CLEAN PARTY, A PARTY, WHERE EVERYONE, I MEAN EVERYONE RICH OR POOR ARE SAFE

I AM THE COOL PEOPLE’S LITTLE SKATEGOAT, AND I AM A BIT OF A SILLY GOAT

CAUSE, I KNOW MY STORIES ARE HELPING A LOT OF PEOPLE

WE DO LIVE HERE IN AUSTRALIA, MATE, WHERE WE LIVE IN A CULTURE OF REAL COOL PARTY GOERS

AND THE PROBLEM IS, THEY TAKE THE PARTY ON TO BEING KILLED OR KILLING SOME INNOCENT FAMILY

AND CRONUS, WHO IS ME DOESN’T ALOOW THIS, I AM NO OLD FOGIE I JUST CARE FOR THE WELLBEING OF MY FELLOW, MAN

I LIKE THE IDEA, OF PEOPLE LEAVINGT EACH OTHER ALONE, IF I DON’T WANT TO DRINK WITH YOU, I SHOULDN’T HAVE TO

CARE FOR YA FELLOW MAN, THAT HAS ALWAYS BEEN MY PHILOSOPHY

I RESPECT YOU AS LONG AS YOU FOLLOW THE PARTY CODE, LIKE ME

WE ALL LIVE IN THE CONVICT COLONY, THE CONVICT COLONY THE CONVICT COLONY

IT’S IN AUSTRALIA’S CULTURE TO HAVE A FEW BEERS, YEAH MATE YEAH YEAH I’M RAD

AND THEN MR FRED HAMILTON, WHO IS A FIRM BELIEVER IN POOR RIGHTS

SAW SOME DRUNKS PICKING ON A HOMELESS MAN, SAYING, YOU ARE NOT A REGULAR AUSTRALIAN, YOU HAVEN’T GOT A BEER

AND FRED CAME UP AND SAID, YOU LEAVE HIM ALONE YOU BUNCH OF CRAZY DRUNKS

HE IS HOMELESS, HE CAN’T AFFORD BEER, HE CAN’T AFRORD WINE, LEAVE HIM ALONE AND FRED GAVE THE HOMELESS MAN $50 TO SPEND HOW HE SEES FIT

FRED SANG WE ALL LIVE IN THE CONVICT COLONY, THE CONVICT COLONY THE CONVICT COLONY

IT’S IN OUR CULTURE IN AUSTRALIA TO DRINK AND TREAT THE HOMELESS PEOPLE LIKE DIRT, THE HOMELESS ARE JUST TRYING TO FIT IN

AND THEY BECAUSE OF TONY ABBOTT, THEY ARE FORCED TO EAT THEIR ******* FROM A BIN

THEY ARE TRYING TO FIT IN, TO SOCIETY, WHEN NOBODY GIVES A WINK

WE ALL LIVE IN THE CONVICT COLONY, THE CONVICT COLONY THE CONVICT COLONY

IT’S IN AUSTRALIA’S CULTURE TO DRINK ON AUSTRALIA DAY, HAVE A BEER, AND GET INTO A FIGHT, MAKES YOU A REAL AUSTRALIAN, I DON’T BELIEVE IN VIOLENCE IN THAT WAY

ENJOY DRINKING AND GETTING ******, BUT I SAY, NO VIOLENCE, I SAY NO VIOLENCE

WHY DO YOU WANT VIOLENCE ANY WAY, PEOPLE JUST END UP GETTING HURT, IN MORE WAYS THAN ONE

IF YA WANNA FIGHT, TAKE UP BOXING, WHERE THE OTHER PERSON WANTS TO FIGHT ALSO

TOO MANY PEOPLE GET KILLED FROM ILLEGAL FIGHTING, TOO MANY PEOPLE GET KILLED FROM ILLEGAL FIGHTING TOO MANY PEOPLE GET KILLED FROM ILLEGAL FIGHTING

THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH CELEBRATING AUSTRALIA DAY, MATE, BUT KEEP THE VIOLENCE OFF THE STREET, UMMMMMMM ME WHO IS CRONUS HAS SPOKEN AND SPOKEN I SHALL

WE ALL LIVE IN THE CONVICT COLONY THE CONVICT COLONY THE CONVICT COLONY

IT’S AUSTRALIA DAY MATE, BY ALL MEANS PARTY, HAVE A BBQ, ENJOY THE FESTIVITIIES, JUST LIKE ME

BUT BE GOOD PEOPLE, YOU ****** WELL SEE

AND THEN I WALKED IN THE ROOM, CRACKED OPEN A COKE CAN AND SAY HAPPY AUSTRALIA DAY EVERYONE, AND BE GOOD
THE PARTY AT PRINCE REGENT HOTEL FOR NEW YEARS


YA SEE WE PARTIED AT PRINCE REGENT HOTEL

ON NEW YEARS EVE, OH YEAH THAT SOUND SWEET

YA SEE THE CHEF HAD A BIG FRY UP WITH LEFT OVER SNAGS AND STEAKS

UEAH THAT SOUNDS SO COOL

AND ALL THE MEN SAT IN THE CORNER, DUDE

SAYING TOO EACH OTHER, WHAT A FINE COLLECTION OF *****

AND ONE FATHER GAVE HISW 8 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER SCOTCH AND COKE

AND DESPITE THE HOTEL STAFF HATING IN, THEIR HANDS WERE TIED

GREG LIKED THAT INTEGRITY, OH YEAH, DUDES, THOUGHT IT WAS RAD

CAUSE GREG WASN’T GOING TO BE LABLED A PARTY POOPER

IN EVERY STRETCH OF THE IMAGINATION

GREG DECIDED TO LAY LOW FOR A WHILE, SO HE GOT DRESSED UP AS THE NEW YEAR TIGER, DUDE

AND PUT ON A LITTLE SHOW FOR THE KIDS TO ENJOY THEIR NEW YEARS

GREG WAS A BIT WEIRD CAUSE HE WAS FORCING KIDS TO LISTEN TO HIM LISTEN TO HIM LISTEN TO HIM

THE KIDS WERE TIRED BUT GREG STILL FORCED THE KIDS TO LISTEN TO HIS NEW YEAR TIGER SHOW

YA SEE THIS DAY WAS START OF MY PARANORMAL VOICES YA SEE

YOU SEE ROSLYN MARRIED ME, CAUSE I WAS FORCING KIDS TO WATCH MY SHOWS

WHETHER THEY WERE TIRED OR NOT

YA SEE, WHEN I WAS YOUNG IN THIS LIFE, I HEARD VOICES OF PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT ME, BEHIND MY BACK

I DIDN’T KNOW WHAT TO MAKE OF IT AT FIRST, AND PEOPLE ARE RIBBING ME, BY SAYING SHUT UP WOOSEY

TO ME, AND NOW AS I REMEMBER, AS THE DINNER WAS OVER, JOSEPH PEANUCKLE

DECIDED TO GO TO HIS SUITE TO GET HIS FLUTE TO ENTERTAIN THE CROWD

AND THE LADIES AND MEN DANCED WITH EACH OTHER AND GREG AND THE

HOTEL STAFF WERE TALKING TO EACH OTHER, ISN’T THIS WONDERFUL

AND EACH OF US HAS 6 MILLION POUNDS EACH, AND IF EACH OF THE STAFF

PUTS IN 1 MILLION POUNDS, PRINCE REGENT HOTEL CAN GET THE COUNTRY CLUB UPGRADE

THAT IT THOROUGHLY DESERVES, AND AS THEY PARTY INTO THE NIGHT, AT 11.55 PM

GREG DRESSED UP AS THE NEW YEAR TIGER AND SANG

I AM A TIGER IN A TOP HAT

A TIGER IN A WHITE TIE

AND WE’LL PARTY ON DOWN

YA SEE, I AM A TIGER IN A TOP HAT

A TIGER IN A WHITE TIE

AND COUNT ‘EM OWN

HE REPEATED THAT TILL THE BIG COUNTDOWN

AND LED THE COUNTDOWN

10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 AND YELLED OUT HAPPY NEW YEAR

AND JOSEPH PLAYED AULD LENG ZINE ON THE FLUTE

AND PLAYED OTHER SONGS ON THE FLUTE TILL 1-29 AM IN THE MORNING

ALL THE HOTEL GUESTS, ALL WENT TO BED, WHILE GREG AND THE HOUSE KEEPERS

WERE CLEANING UP AFTERWARDS, AND THIS HAPPENED EVERY YEAR OF THE

1817 TO 1819, THE 1820S THE 1830S THE 1840S

AND GREG WAS GREAT, EACH YEAR BRINGING THE NEW YEAR IN WITH A GRIN

HAPPY NEW YEAR, FROM THE OLD FASHIONED PRINCE REGENT HOTEL

AND ALL UPGRADES WERE SUCCESSFUL, MELBOURNE WERE THE TALK OF THE COUNTRY BACK THEN

HAPPY NEW YEAR
hi dudes




i am enjoying watching neighbours at the moment because it teaches that people don’t trust

anyone who ever messes with kids, yeah, i dealt with it, i didn’t know it at the time but i dealt with it

at the time i thought they were rich ****** but i have to be careful as i can’t seem to get past this

i am just in the same boat as steph, you see she was worried about losing her son, and me, i wanted

to be with the cool kids down the mall, now, dudes, i haven’t caused many problems lately and i am ready

for and nonsense teasingt, i think that neighbours is being thorough in showing how people who hassles

children get treated, once a man looked at me weird just for sitting next to his daughter and he said mate

kids are innocent and then said i know all about ya, it taught i will never be a father or family man and people

tell me to stop looking at their babies, with the words, get ya fucken eyes off my baby, when i ain’t looking at their

fucken baby, young teenagers tell me to stop staring, but they just don’t want me staring, i don’t think they knew me

but steph is being tortured in her mind by situations that make her crazy, especially when you can’t change the past

and steph, as well as me, should be left alone to get better, you see what these people who tease you don’t realise

is, steph as well as me are dealing with, finding it hard to get past their past, especially when i was being teased like

being given wee, nobody wanted to party in nightclubs with me, or a goofy friend with anger management issues,

you see i am never going to have kids

nobody wants me because i am ugly and they can’t trust me

it’s worst for steph cause her issues with kids were close to her

you see i got grabbed outside the charnwood inn and i ran through civic saying FUCKEN STOP HASSLING ME

steph is feeling the same way, but she hears green sleeves, over and over and dudes, she is getting teased by a ****

yeah you heard me right, A BIG RICH ****, she got a phone call saying it was charlie, but it appears not, and then

another woman who is also is a BIG RICH ****, had a son Charlie, and she said she wanted the extra and then

she came back and said she never asked for it, and there was no Charlie, and yes, she was a BIG RICH ****, don’t ever

think that kind of teasing is cool, because it ain’t, remember what hannah montana said, everybody makes mistakes

everybody has those days, and NOBODY’S PERFECT,   you see i would like to see steph do a bit of buddhist positive suffering

to show the world, how many problems the mentally ill deal with each today, if she loses her job, who cares, it teaches the crowd that

mentally ill people are just getting treated like hobos, you see, ya know, no matter what i did, people do many worst  things than me

like armed robberies, and some people **** kids, me or steph never killed them, you see if we saw steph suffer a bit on the show

it teaches the world how awful people who have a mental problem and a past have to deal with it, you see my writing is good

still mentally ill, my art is talented, still mentally ill, i get reviews i don’t like i a man said i was ******* but i think my shows are cool

and i have a very chronic mental illness, perhaps i have to wait till my next life to get jobs or have fun with kids, oh well,

but i am grateful to channel 10 are using steph to show how mentally ill people suffer

i know what i did, but i am doing art and theatre go to poetry slams do shows on youtube

go to the christmas carols watching parades on youtube, and i helped mentally ill people have a meal when the BIG RICH *****

have forgotten about or teasing, you see the country we live in don’t give a flying **** about the mentally ill, the teasers start the problems

of the person by doing a harmless little tease, only to BIG FAT RICH *****, steph from neighbours is the mentally ill’s skate goat

my advice to you, don’t go to people’s homes  all it might send your voices going haywire, i am happy that channel 10 is using steph

to show the world what mentally ill people are going through, and instead of seeing steph go back to the psych ward, how about

the world gives her a case manager and loads of activites like bowling and golf, they do it on the family sitcoms, i just am so tired of

channell 10 are so blind when it comes to mental illness, the mentally ill need community care on the show neighbours, ok
THE GREAT POOL TOURNAMENT



we are here at the Green bay packers football club, for the annual pool competition

and we have a great line up of pool champions from simon o’heary and brendan itato,

they are the players who fought it out in last years final, and this year promises to be a bumper

of a tournament.    


the first match is between samuel patrice and johnny carter, and samuel gets the break which is a beauty

knocking the number 14 in first and then knocked the number 12 in next and his third go, he attempted to

knock the number 9 in but missed by a whisker

and then johnny had his go, and he is on smalls, yep he missed the pocket with the first shot by the skin of his teeth

so samuel lined up with his next shot and knocked the 15v and the number 9 in, and only had 16, 10 and 11 to go

before the black ball, samuel was on a roll, and then samuel knocked the number 10 in, and there was no way he was

going to lose this game, no way, but then he knocked the 16 in and then straight away knocked the 11 in and then he was

on the 8 ball, and if he knocks this one in, the game is won, and the black was right near the hole, which was easy for samuel to sink

and he sank it, and samuel won, and johnny carter was out yet again, and samuel moved onto the next round, where he played the

winner of the other table, who was phillip cutherhead, and this was promising to be a promising match, so the referee tossed the coin

and phillip won and decided to break, and when he did he sent the ***** to 7th heaven, you see phillip beat 17 year old colin hayes,

who was hoping to ****** up the tournament, and when we interviewed colin, man, he was very disappointed but he knew that this year

wasn’t his year, samuel had the second shot, and by geez, he couldn’t have whacked a more perfect shot knocking the number 6 in the left

middle pocket, radical, samuel continued to show style by knocking 4 in right bottom and 3 in left middle and 5 in left middle and 2 in middle right

and 1 in middle left and 7 in middle right and then knocked the 8th in to win this easily.

the next game started with samuel and his opponent harry burns knocking each ball in 1 by 1 and samuel ended up winning this close match by a flukey

knock of the number 13 and the next shot on the 8th meant if you miss this you are going to harry’s  turn so he knocked it in and samuel went to the bar

to rest up till his next game.and watch the match to see his next opponent, and the match was between brendan schultz and simon weather by and brendan

broke and it was a ****** powerful shot and simon was left wondering what hit him, brendan was the third best last year and he was determined to become

2 times better and simon wanted to set a trap for brendan, so to speak, he had some tricks lined up, and brendan wasn’t shy to display these shots in the match

brendan did a trickshot knocking number 14 in middle right and 9 in bottom left and 12 in middle left all at once, which left simon completely speechless,

brendan ended up winning and was waiting for simon to finish his losers interview, so he can talk about that win, simon told the press a pack of wild bulls

couldn’t beat brendan in this match and then he congratulated brendan, brendan was happy to be in the final against samuel to see who comes 1st or 2nd


1.  they played the national; anthem of the USA

2.  Samuel and brendan stood back to back and the referee was standing behind them

3.  10 year old benjamin whaler tossed the coin to see who will break in the tournament final, brendan won and chooses to break

4.  brendan and simon had a arm wrestle in the lead up and on with the GAME in this bumper grand final


brendan broke and by geez he broke a beauty and knocked the 11 ball in and is on bigs, the next shot, brendan scattered all the ***** on

every corner of the table, and samuel had his next shot, and can’t believe he missed everything forcing brendan to have 2 shots, must be nerves

from the other two wins, brendan’s first shot knocked 16 and 5 in, which ruined the 2 shots that samuel gave him, samuel was very excited, he went

straight over to knock the 3 ball in and then knocked the 7 ball in and then nearly knocks the 4 ball in, but didn’t, and after that brendan sank the white ball

which gave samuel 2 shots, let’s hope he doesn’t do what brendan did, samuel concentrated very hard hitting the 3 ball in and then 1 ball in and then

the 6th ball in and then knocked the 2 ball, and without knowing it samuel was looking like winning the tournament, as he was 1 ball away from winning

the tournament, and samuel had his next shot but there was a lot of pressure, he sank the white and gave brendan 2 shots, which made brendan have

to concentrate, because he couldn’t make a mistake because samuel was on the 8 ball, brendan did a trick shot sinking 9 ball into middle left side and 10 ball

into middle right and 15 into right bottom, and then did another trick shot knocking 11 ball in the left middle pocket and 12 ball in the right middle pocket and

13 ball in the right corner pocket and 14 ball in the middle left, and both samuel and brendan were both on the 8th, the next whot brendan missed the right bottom pocket

and samuel had his shot and sank the black right into the top right pocket, which gave sam the tournament and brendan went out of the building refusing to talk to any member

of the press, the next step was



1.  brendan congratulated sam on his great win

2.   sam gets the trophy and says thanks to the crowd for making this all possible

the speech

i didn’t think i would win that last match

brendan was putting on some very good shots

and if it wasn’t for him missing that last shot

i wouldn’t’ have the chance, THANKS EVERYONE

and then sam held the cup over his head, and did a lap of honour around the pool hall, , and then the announcer said samuel, you are the best

and we will see you next year

GOODBYE
1.4k · Jun 2015
my voices in the psych ward
psych ward dramas




ok, i believe i am here today

to let people have fun

i get leave every day to keep

an eye on the world

so i can help, in the way that i do

i know people can get sick of me

saying i am cronus and ****

but i do that, so i can save people on earth

so we don’t bring the old days back

cause a lot of those criminals

you can see in the glossy magazines

they look like they ae copying me

and that sort of made me feel

that i have created a world

that is full of death and yobbism

jake does a guitar solo which makes

the crowd really cheer out his name

jake jake jake oi oi oi

now, if i can get out of here

i really want to go to adelaide

so i can be in the christmas city of the world

and i want to support the adelaide crows

and go to the AFL grand final

i also wanna do my art

and profit from my writing

you see i really want to

make this psych ward a happy place to get well in

cause, really, i am still a kid

cause, to myself, i never had a good education, and i am prepared

to do that again, cause

i want that whole sill nonsense, ya know

like i am not mucking with you mate neh

, and i hate people saying your like us now man

and your not an old dogie, mate

and every kid, i thought

were trying to be cool

to make us all tease my daddy

now i was having fun

but i am 46, and i need a perfect change

and, still, ya know, i am cool

jake really stole the show with a great guitar solo

now, i want my parents to visit me

that’ll be kinda fun

but i don’t want to be a client, all my life

and i want to stop phedaphelia, cause it’s bad

i don’t care about what used to happen, i know

buddha wouldn’t like that

ya need to respect kids ya know

it’s just that it’s fucken hard to stop a kidnapper

and that is why buddha tries to make peace with this whole situation

and yesterday, i explained

that about 63 australians jumping from a plane

and i portrayed it as every victim of school shootings  coming back to earth

nobody dies ya know, we are all here there and everywhere

the cartoonist said, this is a cartooning class, not a psychology class or a vision class

i would like to teach people about space travel via sleep, like i do

cause, man, this is ****** fun and i do do a show on channel 44

and if people complain about me

i will say, get with the times ya ***

jake did a big guitar solo which gave a freezing blizzard to mercury
1.4k · Jul 2015
READING POEMS ON SATURN
Anthony and Mark reading a poem on Saturn



You see fellas we are both out of the problem planet earth
And I can tell you, that I am glad and so is my mate Mark
As soon as Mark died he went straight to Saturn
And said hi Anthony, how's it going
I said the medications got you to
Well, mate now you are safe away from people who can harm you
They will never get you again
I will make sure your safe, and you will feel safe
If not now, but in the future, I love you Mark
And I watched those people on earth
Refusing to Cuddle you, with the problems you had
Anyway, I live in this place in Saturn
And my neighbour is great cricketer Don Bradman
Every night, I sing to him
Our Don Bradman, we're just like you,,safe away from pressures that Earth has
Our Don Bradman, as an earthiling you were very good
But Don Bradman, you can succeed more because you are so great
You can average 100 here, and no one will stop you if your any good
Then I told Mark, I know you like cricket, and you love music
And I have the great Micheal Hutchence play for me once a week
Yes, Mark, you don't want to come back to earth
You can stay with me, up here on Saturn
Where we can have a great time, enjoying every day life
And Mark I also have a St kilda player giving me Aussie rules pointers
And I can tell you, that Trevor Barker opened my eyes
I can play Aussie rules, so Mark , I will sing to you
Our Trev Barksr, you showed how to play Aussie rules
Our Trev Barker, as a footy star, you know how the match is played
Our Trev Barker, yes, we'll win it so ****** easily
Mark went up to Trev Barker saying Marks my name
And me and Mark are travelling all over the solar system
Having a lot of fun, cause really the only way you can get here
Is if you really study the bible back to front
So let's have fun, Mark, and really show Saturn how to party
Mark said, yes, the voices have stopped, I am saved
And so is Anthony, both are happy


Sent from my iPhone
the storm is in sydney, where my fathers next life were in a safe place

watching the storm, what we don’t know is the storm in sydney was

caused by evil spirits from the universe asthey drop the

lightning down over sydney forcing people to be scared and everyone is sydney

are looking up with amazement saying what a big storm caused by the spirits

of buddhas enermies are causing problems with the air of sydney

ummmmmmm the thinderr is erupting in sydney

ummmmmmm  evil spirits are in the air

ummmmmmm storms in sydney and bombs in jakarta

please buddha stop these evil ghosts from destroying our mother earth

ummmmmm whoever or whatever the ghosts are called, please make them surrender

before too many people are killed

ummmmmmmm please save jakarta from these terror attacks

no matter what, keep everyone safe, please keep everyone safe

ummmmmmmm please protect the innocent children who can’t get home

ummmmmmm make everyone not stray away from families and friends

ummmmmmm please make sure the sydney storms don’t spread all over

as the damage is too severe

we need rain in sydney but not the lightning strikes that they are getting

ummmmmmm stop the jakarta terrorist attacks

ummmmmmm come on buddha free the lightning strikes in sydney

ummmmmmm it’s terrible ummmmmm to see the buildings getting blown up

ummmmmmmm if people have relatives in jakarta, i hope they are ok

we want peace bring us peace, peace is what we need
i just heard some awesome news

that makes me feel very cool

you see this years credit union christmas parade

will be LIVE all over Australia on GEM

i am looking forward to it, as i have only been to two

i want to watch it, it’ll be rad, thank you Adelaide for listening to my emails

i know i can be annoying, but you listened to me, oh yeah

watching the parade LIVE in canberra,

while we don’t have any here

we only have parades for babies, and a parade for the whole family on GEM will be radically awesome

because this parade is the best parade in Australia, better than canberra anyway

all we have in Canberra is people hanging around the mall teasing like children

but on november 14 my mate, i will be in my house watching the credit union christmas parade live on channel GEM

i love life, i love being alive because Adelaide are listening to me

adelaide adelaide adelaide rah rah rah

adelaide adelaide adelaide the best christmas parade by far

adelaide adelaide adelaide LIVE on channell GEM

it’s better oh so better than missing out this year because you have no money

adelaide adelaide adelaide we are the best

the christmas pageant on from 11 to 1 on 14 november on channel GEM

we wish you a merry christmas we wish you a merry christmas we wish you a merry christmas

and a joyous new year and a very joyous new year oh yeah
1.4k · Mar 2015
playing with knives
brian has a knife to his neck



today is a horrible day for brian, well, not that horrible, well he went to

the baseball, with cath and michelle from his work, and they all went for

the local team which was the canberra cavalry, and every time the cavalry

scored a home run, brian, cath and michelle would cheer very loudly,

cavalry clap clap clap, cavalry clap clap clap, cavalry clap clap clap

and the cavalry didn’t disappoint their supporters in this match, and

then the hit a beautiful home run and cath caught it, what a absolute whopper

and she said, that she will give it to her 12 year old son, and then daniel sat near

brian and said you are too woosey to be a man like this, how about we leave now

so i can hold a knife to your neck, i don’t want to harm you, i just want to have

a piece of you with each of us, brian said, no, i am watching the baseball, can’t

you understand this, and daniel said, no, i can’t understand why you can’t come

with me, you are too woosey to be a family person anyway, buddy, and brian just sat there

and then young micheal sat next to brian, and he had a little pocket knife, with him

and mate, he was very inexperienced with knives, like he often put a knife at people’s

necks, as if it was a special game or something, and after the game was over, brian

said goodbye to cath and michelle and ran off towards the bus, and daniel followed him

with his pocket knife, if brian stopped, the knife would go straight through his neck, and

as usual, brian was scared that daniel was going to **** him, and ran home saying

leave me alone leave me alone, i am a cool kid, i went out with people from my work

and i don’t deserve what you are doing to me, and brian got home and locked his door

and daniel yelled through his door, saying open up little woosey, you aren’t like the adults,

open up little woosey, you aren’t like adults, and brian went to bed, and the next morning

brian got up and went to work and micheal was in the front, playing with his pocket knife

while daniel was in the back, playing with his pocket knife, and brian hates the idea

of dying, but every time daniel picked up his pocket knife, he would hold it to brian’s neck and

say, come on little woosey, allow me to stab you, man, allow me to stab you, and brian’s mate

from 1989  was screaming through houses,,saying shut up, every time brian tried to be a family

person, despite not really meaning to do that, he just did that to make the other young dudes to like him

and brian massaged nicheals neck, and micheal said, stop it, or i will get this knife, and put it right to

your neck and then daniel jumped into the back seat and said, come on little woosey, except me

as i am holding this knife to ya, i want to scare you off from being a family person, cause youy

are too woosey to be a family person anyway, brian, and daniel picked up the pocket knife and

said, i will stab you woosey, brian said, i am a famous family person, and daniel said, yeah, a

family person to a ****, yeah and famous only to your mothers eyes, only, if you try and be like us, brian

i will get this knife and stab you in the neck, cause you are a little trouble making woosey, and

brian said, leave me alone, i am reformed, i haven’t done a crime for years, and this person

said, no you are not reformed buddy, be like us buddy, your not reformed brian, brian said

i am reformed, it’s daniel and micheal that need to be reformed, and you need to be reformed

too, and then daniel held a knife to brian’s neck and said you ain’t a man, your too woosey

to be a man, your not reformed brian, and brian said, i am so reformed, i don’t need this

awful treatment i am getting from you, you see micheal was playing with his pocket knife

he looked like bart simpson, and daniel kept on holding the knife to brian’s head saying

no your not, you ain’t reformed, buddy, you are a little woosey, and brian screamed out

I AM NOT A LITTLE WOOSEY, I AM FAMILY PERSON, WOULD YOU STOP TREATING ME

LIKE A HOOLIGAN, I HATE HAVING A POCKET KNIFE TO MY HEAD, IT’S NOT A FUCKEN PRISON

brian was horrified that daniel was going to **** him, and micheal wasn’t that gentle with his pocket knife either

and brian said, it’s not a prison, and then said, please don’t treat me like a little woosey, for i am a family person

and then brian jumped out of the window, saying, I AM REFORMED, please leave me the **** alone, and

then brian took off through the paddock, back to his house, and never saw daniel and micheal again,

good riddens to bad ******* thought brian, as brian sat in his house watching foxtel thinking about how stupid micheal and

daniel are, the end
Captured in the psych ward
The crazy father figure


Today was a weird day for Ron
As he entered the coffee shop ******* about the short sleep
Night he had after the police brought in a crazy father figure in mate at the bendigo police station and at 11 pm
At night Ron was awoken to get in his car to drive out to bendigo and pick him up and take him to the HDU
And put him into the solitary cell untill morning and Ron then said
We have to spend all day trying
To find out his story and then after
Ron finished his cake and coffee
He went back to the HDU and started to hear his story, so he can be put on the right medication
And be healed and he started off saying he was Robert jones and
He had this pact to daddy one if his school friends who was a bit unstable, but mainly because he wanted to bully him and then Ron asked why did you do that bad Robert said well, I hated what other people were doing to him, so I wanted to get him out of this weird situation and keep him with us heavy metal young dudes and Ron said
Are you sure he likes heavy metal,
Not everyone likes heavy metal ya know, and Robert said, he likes heavy metal, and another thing too
He never felt hostile when we listened to it, but then Ron said, ok
Did he show you he liked sports
And Robert said yes, but he drifted away from that and I hated how he was treated at school, I wanted him to have a cool life and Ron said ok
Why did your mate make this so called (quotey fingers ) complaint
And Robert said yeah but he is dellisional cause as my name suggests I am like a daddy to him
You see he lost his father when he was 12 and I felt sorry for him and
Another thing too I became a good mate, like taking him to footy and taking him to concerts and getting in trouble with the security at night clubs and also joining in on his family  picnics , you see Ron there is nothing wrong with me and then Ron said why did the police choose your friends word over yours, there must be an actual reason and Robert said
He is a fucken back stabber, that us what he is, a fucken back stabber
And then as Ron was trying to figure out that Robert should go on largactil and haliperidol and see what it does and then day after say Robert told of all the bad stuff that this mate did to him like tying up a young girl
And punching his brother Tom in the gut and breaking his entire guns and roses collection and then Robert said he is the fucken one who should be in this HDU, not me and Ron gave him the medication and went home watched TV and ordered a pizza and fell asleep in front of the TV as usual and the next day he went back to the HDU to talk to Robert some more and made him more angrier when Ron said that they have to keep him there for a while but Robert was no snitch and
Said I am no experiment you see
So just medicate me and then let me go but Ron said ok and at the end of the day, Ron went to the coffee shop and spoke to the owner for hours about not really listening to his problems because his hands are tied and Ron was puzzled saying I gave him the medication and I am letting him explain his problems and now
I say my hands are tied and then Ron went home and got on the Internet to find out what illness he has, but he fell asleep looking and then watched a man with similar problems on YouTube and yes, I think this might be the answer to his problem and then he fell asleep on the couch and went to work the next day determined to beat Roberts problems and he will


Sent from my iPhone
you are so dumb indeed

you want the chance to be free

everyone in the cosmos cheers for me and mummy

to beat this world indefemtly

god is just a cause to worry

mainly brought out by the fear of your parents

you see i can say shut up dummy

and you will listen unless you are square, yeah

dummy dummy you are a little dummy

you have no brains unless it is in your tiny toe

i am a man who loves life, i am not a dummy, mate

i want to liver life to the full

but instead you put me in front of that bull

and say sit there dummy, let the bull attack

i say no, don’t let him leave the rack

i am a technology ****

and i just vomited **** in the toilet, discussing, hey

hey hey hey is in the paddock where the horses are

but it might be in your mouth when you are trying to be a conservative ****

i hear dad say, shut up dummy, but i prefer to be a cool cat

yeah, dudes, lets party on

in every club in this god forsaken town

you say shut up dummy as much as you like

you know way back in the olden days when i wanted my mates to call me spike

i will get on the poetry slam stage and grab the mike

and read the poem with shut up dummy in my head

i don’t want it, i don’t want it, leave me alone

neh, he will say, as he wants to sit there saying yeah mate continuously teasing all night

i know you are saying shut up dummy oh yeah

but you must remember i am a person oh yeah

i don’t want you to go yeah mate continuously mate, and i don’t want to get callas dummy

but i still hear the words shut up dummy and yeah mate

i have no idea why it’s in my head, i just think it’s because i am a techno ****

shut up dummy stop teasing me, man

causa i am the coolest dude in the land
1.4k · Jul 2015
randy's problem
Home improvement randy leaves in a black kidnappers van



You see it was a usual Christmas at the Taylor's and randy who was 15
Was busy at the homeless shelter, each day, but one poor man, who was
Getting ****** around by right wing governments decided to talk to randy
And yes randy, being the helpful soul that he is, spoke and joked around
With him, and this man said, how about we meet down the mall, ya see
I really am doing it tough, buddy, and it would mean a lot for me, if you would
Meet me there, and randy, said well, yeah alright see ya there, and went home
And when he told tim and Jill, well they were worried, but they were looking
Out for him and brad said, dude, it's suspicious, I will come with you and
Randy said, no buddy, I think this means nothing and randy went to bed
Already to meet his new found homeless friend and the next day, his homeless
Friend hot-wired this black van and then randy left his house to meet him
And on the way to the mall, the man jumped out of the van and grabbed randy
And randy found himself bound and gagged in the back, and randy struggled
And yelled our, HELP let me out, let me out, but this man drove randy to a very
Dark looking cave, and inside this dave were Indian drawings and randy who is
Unaware of the dangers he is in, was fascinated by these drawings and then
The man drew a picture explaining the things randy is going to suffer from
In here but despite taking a while to catch on, he finally figured out that this
Man, was bad news, and randy now realises his life is in danger and this
Made him very scared, the man looked at randy and said, buddy, you are dead
In 3 days and this made randy so scared, he struggled to get out, and the man
Rang up tim and Jill saying he has their son, blah blah blah, and there is nothing
They can do, to save him, from this trauma, randy was scared, but he was smart
Enough to understand that this could be the end of his life, and he struggled
And struggled to get through but these ropes were on so tight it gave him rope burns
And tim and Jill said, I will withdraw $20-000-000 out and you can give randy back
And then tim though, I knew that this man was up to no good, but the man won't
Budge, he didn't want the money, well he did, but having randy was more important
That any crazy dollar bill, ever could help, randy was still struggling and it made him
Feel like he was suffocating and randy screamed, HELP, I need to get out of here,
I am captured by this homeless kidnapper, well that is whet he was saying, but
The gag was tightly round his mouth, so all that he was letting out was wool lobby
Weeeeeretrtyes, well carp like this, and the kidnapper was really having a field day
With tim and Jill, saying your son is with me, you will never ever get your son back
Cause he tried to be a hotshot cool kid, and randy is not like us, his elder brother brad
Is like us, and young brother mark is a ******, but little teaser randy, is mine, I have
This kid where I want him, right now, he will never escape, no way hoisei, and
Tim and Jill got really worried, as they tried to alert the police but the police had no leads
But they told tim and Jill that they will do their best and tim and Jill gave them a
Photo of randy, and told them that there was this homeless man, who randy was
Befriending and they are pretty sure it is him who has kidnapped randy, and then after
Tim and Jill explained what happened, well, yeah, but if randy wanted it, it ain't kidnapping
But there are more fierce charges that we can put him on if he has your son and if he has harmed your son in an way, like grevious ****** harm, it's still wrong what he is doing
And tim and Jill left and the police did their best, and then a call came in saying a man
Came back to the carpark to find his tools all broken and over the road, and the police went
Down to check it out, and the police said, well we have to alert the Taylor's cause there could be a connection between this van robbery and randy's kidnapping and as soon
As tim heard, he demanded that the police do a city search, which they did, stopping at
Every gas station and ice cream shop, asking if they saw the car and whether they saw
Randy or this man, now nobody can help, cause this kidnapping is so closed off from
The rest of the world and randy was struggling with the kidnapper singing the song,
We're not going to take it, no we are never going to take it, no we ain't going to take it, anymore, and I am not taking any **** from you dude, and as randy heard that, he was
Really scared, and screamed right into the heavens, **** and the kidnapper put the duct tape back on his mouth saying shut up, *******, you are not like us, no more, you
Are like an old biddy's kid, buddy, and the police were still searching and searching
And just as they were about to give up, they saw a van matching the missing cars description near the old fashioned caves, and went down to take peak and this man
Looking suspicious, who was the kidnapper, was trying to flee the scene, but the police
Were too quick and the other policeman searched the cave and noticed randy hanging
By his neck in the cave, but the police got their in the nick of time and they saved randy
And randy was returned to the Taylor's and randy had to have counselling and the kidnapper
Was sentenced to life imprisonment but if he was good after 40 years, he will be could get free, but the homeless man said thank you, I only did it to get a home and all the rich ******
Have to pay for my rent in their taxes, *******, rich conservative *****, and randy
Was having mojo issues from the ordeal, brad and mark helped him get through this


Sent from my iPhone
THE ALLAN FAMILY FUN DAY AT THE SPORTS


YA SEE, WE HAD FUN GOING  TO RAIDERS BACK WHEN THEIR HOME GAMES WAS

AT SEIFFERT OVAL IN QUEANBEYAN, WITH MY MATE LYLE, FRANK AND PAT

AND WE CUT OUR LUNCHES AND PACKED OUR BAGS, GOT OUR FLAGS READY

WITH JUMPERS JUST IN CASE WE GOT COLD, AND OFF TO THE FOOTY WE GO

AND WE YELLED OUT RAIDERS CLAP CLAP CLAP RAIDERS CLAP CLAP CLAP

EVEN IF THEY **** OR NOT, WE STILL BARRACKED FOR THE RAIDERS

WE YELLED OUT

RAIDERS CLAP CLAP CLAP RAIDERS CLAP CLAP CLAP RAIDERS CLAP CLAP CLAP

AND LYLE YELLED BLUE ****** AT THE REFEREE

AND THE LADY BEHIND SAID, CAN YA QUIETEN YA LANGUAGE, THERE IS A LITTLE GIRL HERE

LYLE GOT CRANKY, DUDE AND THEN WE CHEERED OUT

RAIDERS CLAP CLAP CLAP  RAIDERS CLAP CLAP CLAP RAIDERS CLAP CLAP CLAP

AS THE RAIDERS RUN ON ME AND LYLE, YELLED, GO, GO, GO, GO GO GO

AND AS THE RAIDERS SCORED, ME AND LYLE JUMPED UP AND CHEERED, YIPPEE I AY

WE CHEERED GET PFF HIM YA ****** OPPOSITION PLAYER

OR I WILL TAKE YOU TO THE ****** ESTABLISHORY COURT

ME AND PAT, SAID, WHAT THE **** IS AN ESTABLISERY COURT, ANYWAY

WE BROUGHT OUR RADIOS, SO WE CAN HEAR THE STUPID COOMENTATORS

HARTLEY AND PETERS, MAKE FUN OF EACH OTHER

WE WATCHED ALL 3 GRADES, BUDDY

TEASING ONE ANOTHER AS WE GO ABOUT OUR DUTIES OF CHEERING

RAIDERS CLAP CLAP CLAP RAIDERS CLAP CLAP CLAP  RAIDERS CLAP CLAP CLAP

AND WE HAD FUN TEASING ONE ANOTHER

I WAS THE IMAGINATION KING, AND ME AND LYLE ALSO WENT TO

THE CHEER FOR THE BELCONNEN MAGPIES WITH OUR BLACK AND WHITE STREAMERS

AND I CHEERED LOUDLY AND A LADY SAID, WOULD YOU PLEASE SHUT UP

I SAID NEH,  WHY SHOULD I LAD, IT’S A PRBLIC PLACE THIS FOOTY GROUND

AND AT THE CANBERRA COSTAIN CAT MATCH, I YELLED OUT COME ON *****’S

MEANING I WANT THE **** CCHHERGIRLS TO COME OUT

BUT THIS MAN THOUGHT I MEANT ***** CATS, AND SAID SHUT UP IDIOT

LYLE SAID, DON’T WORRY, IF YA WANT TO CHEER THE CHEERLEADERS ON WITH SOME ***

GO FOR IT, TIGER, AND YOU SHOULD CHEER FOR YOUR TEAM AS MUCH AS YA WANT

ME AND LYLE ALSO TOOK CARLA AND HER BROTHER CHRIS TO THE CANNONS

AND WE YELL OUT, CANNONS CLAP CLAP CLAP CANNONS CLAP CLAP CLAP CANNONS CLAP CLAP CLAP

AND EVERY BASKET, LYLE YELLED OUT, A BIG, HOOOORAHHHH

AND ANOTHER CHEER WENT LIKE THIS

HERE WE GO CANNONS, HERE WE GO, CLAP CLAP

HERE WE GO CANNONS HERE WE GO CLAP CLAP

HERE WE GO CANNONS HERE WE GO CLAP CLAP

AND WE RAN OUT AFTER THE CANNONS WON OR LOST ON TO THE COURT, TO HAVE A FEW SHOTS AT THE BASKET

I REMEMBER, I BECAME VERY POPULAR GOING TO SPORTS EVENTS, LIKE THIS

OUR RAID BASKETBALL WENT ONTO THE FIELD ONE DAY

AND THERE WAS A FINAL ON, AND ME, LYLE AND CARLA WAS IN THE SAME ROW

BECAUSE, THE SEATS, WERE SOLD, LYLE’S MUM SAID

BRIAN IS BEING FUNNY, HE IS PLAYING A JOKE ON YOU

BUT IF LYLE WANTS TO TEASE LIKE THAT WITH HIS FAMILY, I DON’T WANT HIS MATESHIP INTO ADULT HOOD

AND ME AND LYLE HAD A FALLING OUT, LYLE SHIPPED OFF TO SALE,

CANNONS ARE NO MORE

RAIDERS GRAND FINAL IS NO MORE

LYLE’S FRIENDSHIP IS NO MORE

OH YEAH IT SEEMS TO GO, YA DON’T KNOW WHAT YA HAD TILL IT’S GONE

YA SEE WITH PARADISE, WE ENDED THESE STUPID MATES

ALL BECAUSE OF A MISTAKE IN 1990, ON GRAND FINAL DAY

I ALWAYS REMEMBERED PLAYING BASKETBALL AND WODEN AND HAVING A DRINK IN THE CLUB AFTERWARDS

IT WAS RADICALLY AWESOME DUDES

I WAS UNDERAGED, BUT I STUCK WITH JUICE

I REMEMBER PAT ORGANISED THIS BIG BBQ IN HIS FLAT

WITH EVERYONE FROM BASKETBALL

AND WE ALL HAD SO MUCH FUN

THANK YOU PATRICK AND LYLE

FOR LETTING ME HAVE MY WONDERFUL LIFE

THANKS DUDES
1.4k · Sep 2015
aliens are why you grow old
The aliens are coming to put weight on your feet





You see I haven't got any social skills, and I haven't got a decent job
But still people like preaching to me, and they will relax so annoyingly
As if they are really sick of you, or something similar like that
It's alright to be normal adults, and do normal Things
But it's when you preach, and you seem to have even my folks
As cooler people than me, they aren't cool, they don't want to do anything good
The only reason they went on a cruise is because I thought of it
I am cool, and i have fun everywhere, and I party and relax
And take lots of great pictures, yes, that's so cool
I seem to have an adult relationship with other people
But to my family, I am just a little kid, but I ain't a kid
And I feel the aliens are around trying to make my feet feel very tired
I see the aliens are biting my feet, and taking the tips of my feet
For a little spin, yes I am sitting in my living room
Being chewed alive by flesh eating aliens, yes they have abducted me
When I go anywhere with my parents, all the cool people talk to my parents
As if they are cool, and you can say, they're not, I am cool
I don't want people to bash me, or something
They think I ain't normal, and I say that's true, I ain't normal
I am abnormal, especially when normal is drinking beer
And eating more junk food, than you can poke a stick at
And also I think normal also to everyone is  being stupid
And I think that sounds cool as long as it is clean stupid
And not going out robbing banks and stealing cars
The types of things that aliens force you to be
The aliens were getting caught in my body making
Me say that I was 323 years old, and I was born on Christmas day
And the aliens made me say that 23 times in one day
To shop assistants and people down the pub as well as over the web
I even said it to close friends, and they got sick of me, yeah
Then I said the reason I said it, is if you add my ages together
I will be 323 years old, which I didn't say straight away
And it confused him a ****** lot, he kept saying
Stop saying you're 323 years old


Sent from my iPhone
Abbott is a ******

Abbott is a ****

we need to get the country together

to boot him out on his ***

you see Abbott is a stupid clot

who doesn’t care for the poor

he needs money so he grabs money

to the poor peoples expense

Abbott really doesn’t get it does he

the poor are in trouble what does he care

enough to give them a home in a clothing bin

while he has a mansion to live in

I hate Mr Tony Abbott, he is a rich arrogant *****

I prefer Bill shorten at least he cares

but the country is liberalated

Abbott is a dodger of questions about the united nations

when they see him enter the country

there is definatlely no celebration

there is these words that are said but Abbott ignores them like the **** that he is

Abbott is coward, Abbott is a ****

is Canberra ever going to get better, not with Abbott they won’t

i know the labor run Canberra, but they have to run it past Abbott the fed

i call abbott the fed up brigade, everyone is fed up with him

Come on Australia vote for Shorten in the next election

look what rudd and gillard did, gave the poor money

I know the liberals say they put us in debt, but i don’t agree

i think labor care

so Abbott is a ******

Abbott is a ****

come on Australia note him out

right off his ***
i want to be jolly, oh ****** jolly

the happiest man in the whole world

you see i hate yelling on the street

because i see people i know turn off me

you see i am a jolly happy soul, i believe in having fun

i likeb to boot conservos, out on their bums

i want to work in a toy factory, making toys for boys and girls

you see i am a family morals man, chuck your morals in the dunny

i want to help the kids of today, be happy little kids indeed

i am jolly, like santa claus, ** ** **, merry christmas

i am a family person, who loves to do art

i wrote a christmas carol titled silent ****

i wrote summer weather and summer wonderland too

as well stop dreaming of a white christmas

you see people want to fight me, i don’t know why

for i am a nice person, from the earth to the sky

i am not a little kid, i am a cool man, oh yeah

i drink heaps and heaps of soft drink as a replacement for a nice can of beer

i don’t preach to other people, man

so i expect nobody to preach to me

i am a buddhist artist, who is struggling, and i love to party hardy won’t ****** sturdy

i want to work, but i ain’t ready for LEAD yet

because i am a bit upset that 2xx hasn’t called me, for me to read my stories

i am not shy, but i believe i ain’t a hooligan

you see i was a hooligan this afternoon thinking i was teasing the little young dudes

but i don’t want to be a rich arrogant ****

i rang up lifeline today, because i felt my voices were becoming too much

one mate i really liked, was pat because he showed me how to cut loose and party

and i know he ain’t my daddy, but he was a very good friend

so i rang up lifeline, to calm down these voices

i don’t want to get teased by my brother and patrick, you see they will say

what’s that your still getting teased, what’s that your still getting teased

it drives me crazy, AAAAAAAAAH!

cause i am a jolly old should and a jolly old soul am i

i don’t want these schizophrenic voices

because i am smart enough to realise they ain’t true

i am a family person who loves art, and that is whist i do
Sinitta  the girl robot of Saturn



Back in 2004, me , Brian Allan found out in my little way that I and
Only I can make the Planet Saturn have life, as it is on Earth and all the
Planet needs is my little girl robot, which I  invented in metal work class,
And I tried and tried to figure out how I can make this happen,
So I started by bringing the robot into my room and started to search
The internet for clues, and I found out all sorts of ways to make robots talk
But there was nothing on how to make her talking bring life to Saturn, but I
Never gave up and sure enough, I found a site which showed me how to do exactly
What I wanted, so I bookmarked it and had a look to see if it met te criteria as the first
Girl robot, and after 3 hours of searching I found everything I was looking for and
Also noticed, a button that turned on only when it felt emotion and I thought straight
Away that, this was going to be a success, so I took my robot to NASA and explained
How this robot can bring life to Saturn, you see we sent this robot up to Saturn and
If it lasts for 5 hours, then we program it to build schools, shops, restaurants and housing
And then we'll send some NASA members up here to see if they can last up there for 3 weeks, and if they do, we'll start up a regular shuttle space ship about 4 times a day to
Saturn, so we can see how many people will be happy to live there.
NASA was impressed and went to make it work straight away, to make sure this works and then in the NASA newsletter, the boss asked whether anyone will want to see if they can last for 5 hours up there, and because of the excitement of t all, every astronaught
And their dogs put their hands up, which the boss was pleased about, but unfortunaletly
Only 3 can go, because your risking your life if you go there and they had to learn how to
Work the girl robot.
The 3 people chosen were George Kipper, Ricky Kennore and Micheal Wright and they were honored to push for life up in Saturn, it was always a dream to make another planet
Life-like, so at 4.45pm that afternoon the 3 astronaghts went up to Saturn while their
Wives were worried whether or not they will lose their husbands or not.
They tried to keep in contact every night, earth time, just to make sure that their wives
Have no need to worry.
I went up there too and with me, I bought the girl robot, and everyone was mucking around
I was trying to figure out how to make the robot talk and do as we tell it to do, and it was
So much fun doing that.
I was making good progress and the astronaghts said to me, your doing a great job, mate,
And I kept on reading the handbook to teach it emotions as well as happiness, because
We want Saturn, if this expedition works to be a happy place to live for everyone living here,
We had a bumpy ride and we seemed to heading into the black hole, and by the reading we were getting on our computer, we weren't going to make our way through it, so we had to
Figure out how to get through, and everyone said we can't do it and the astronaughts wanted to end it but, me who was determined to make this work,  said to all of them, no
We can get through the black hole, all we need to do is, ask Sinitta, cause I trained her
Through the technology of the black hole, because the black hole is all the modern technology signals all over earth going haywire, so all we need to do is tell Sinitta to save us
And after 345 of saying please Sinitta get us through, Sinitta got us through the black hole and .  We were off to the next leg and it was plain sailing ahead for at least 4 hours earth time.
But after that was finished the space ship started rocking, and forcing the crew to
Move up and down the ship and Sinitta nearly fell into outer space, the wrong way,if it wasn't for the brave efforts of the crew to try and save her we will not have saved her from tumbling out if the ship,     and eventually we got through that and suddenly we crashed *** over head into Jupiter because at that moment a cyclone was forming from there and it was heading to earth, but if it wasn't for us, the cyclone woukd've hit earth but w stopped the cyclone successfully leaving Jupiter for now
But if the cyclone erupted then we would've died.
But we made it through that and we were 3 earth hours outside the planet of Saturn and it was smooth sailing to Saturn and when we arrived we got out and did our experiment talking about our interests, while I set Siniita the robot up to build the buildings there, she did that with no problems And after the expedition was over, it was successful and in 3 months the planet Saturn finally had life and Sinitta the girl robot had a job in the cafe up there and one member of the drew moved up to Saturn with his wife and kids, and they never went back to earth,
Yes this was great.
The end
you see one person goes, no, no, no, let me tease you

you are a hooligan, and we wanna tease you

no no no, we want your money, we want your money

give me your money, give me your money

you see you are still a young dude, your not like your father

no no no, don’t do what you used to do

no no no, you are so easy to tease

i tod them, i am not easy to tease, i am a nice family person

i don’t believe in being horrible, so leave me alone, i am a person

no no no, your not like me, you are still getting teased, buddy

no no no, you are still getting teased

you see your mate is like us brian, your not like us, cause your easy to tease

no no no, your not like us, don’t do tapestries, because your still a young dude

young dudes don’t do tapestries, and you are still a young dude, buddy

i said, i like doing art and if that doesn’t make me a young dude, well i am not a young dude

be4cause i want to be an artist, i am an artist

i don’t want to be treated like a hooligan, or my brother

i am a family person

no no no, your not a family person, no no no your not a family person

then he grabbed some tucker from his fridge and ate it, saying brian is still a family person

and then said no, don’t be like us, no don’t, be like us, buddy

because you are still a young dude, buddy, and you are not like us, buddy

i said, leave me al;one, i am a family person, and i don’t want to constantly be treated like a young dude to a tease

no no no, don;t do what you used to do, no don’t, do what you used to do brian

actually, brian that is what you are meant to do, ya know woosey

no don’t do what you used to do, no don’t

i said i don’t want to be treated like a little young dude to a tease anymore

please leave me alone, and then he said, no no no, no don’t do what you used to do, no don’t

and every time i moved around, he would say that i was a fucken ******, and then said no don’t do what you used to do

cause your easy to tease, briany, your so easy to tease, no don’t do what you used to do, no don’t, buddy

your easy easy, easier to teazse, i said i am not easy to tease, leave me alone

and then he said, don’t say leave me alone, no don’t

i am a family person, not a target to tease, so leave me alone, ****

no no no, don’t speak up for yourself, be like us, no don’t do what ya used to do either, no don’t

i am not a hooligan and they say, yes you are your still a hooligan brian, be like us

i said, no, i want to be a family person, and he said, no don’t do what you used to do

this is going on forever in my mind, please let me get peace
ANYTHING FOR A HOME




THE GOVERNMENTS DON’T CARE FOR THE MENTALLY ILL

THEY DON’T GIVE A ****

YA SEE THIS HOMELESS MENTALLY ILL MAN WAS CAMPING ILLEGALLY

CAUSE HE HAS NO HOME TO GO TO

I THINK IT’S WRONG, WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TOO

SEEING ONE OF THE POOOR AND SUFFERING

GET INTO TROUBLE FOR ILLEGAL CAMPING


UMMMMMMMMMM MAKE THIS POLICE MAN LEARN UMMMMMMMMM

THAT DISCIPLINE LIKE THIS IS WRONG UMMMMMMM PLEASE

INSTEAD OF ARRESTING THEM, GIVE THIS GUY A HOME WITH ROUND THE CLOCK CARE


UMMMMMMMM SO NO PERSON CAN NICK HIS STUFF


UMMMMMMMMM HE SUFFERS MORE THAN THE COPS


UMMMMMMMMM  HE NEEDED TO BE LOOKED AFTER MORE

UMMMMMMMMM  HE DIDN’T DESERVE TO DIE



UMMMMMMMMM   THESE POLICE MEN WERE JUST DOING THEIR JOB, WELL YEAH MATE UMMMMMMMMMM

UMMMMMMMMMM HE HAD NOWHERE LEFT TO GO, UMMMMMMMMM I LIKE MENTAL PEOPLE UMMMMMM


THEY MIGHT LOOK DIFFERENT, UMMMMMMMM THEY ARE ALRIGHT AND FUNNY


UMMMMMMMMMM HE NEEDED TO BE CRIVEN TO A HOME FOR THE HOMELESS

UMMMMMMMMMMM RATHER THAN SHOT, NO THERE IS NO EXCUSE, FOR POLICE DOING THIS

UMMMMMMMMMMM THEY ARE HASSLING THE MENTALLY ILL, IT’S SO WRONG UMMMMMMMM

UMMMMMMMMMMM, I DON’T WANT TO SAY THINGS OUT OF TURN, BUT UMMMMMMM THESE POLICEMEN WERE IN THE WRONG

UMMMMMMMMMMM  THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR KILLING IN EVERY STRETCH OF THE IMAGINATION

UMMMMMMMMMMM IF HE REALLY CARES, THEY WOULDN’T HAVE SHOT HIM DEAD

UMMMMMMMMMMMM SORRY IF I AM TOO HARSH, BUT BUDDHA SAYS KILLING IS WRONG, UMMMMMMMMMM

UMMMMMMMMMMMM NO, BUDDHA, ATHENA, AND CRONUS, WHO IS ME, DOESN’T EXCEPT THIS

UMMMMMMMMMMMM GIVE THIS HOMELESS MAN A MICROPHONE, ON SATURN SO HE CAN RAT OFF THE POLICE THAT KILLED HIM

UMMMMMMMMMMMMM  SOMETIMES IT’S GOOD TO BE HARSH, UMMMMMMMMM IF YOU SEE THE KILLING OF THE HOMELESS


UMMMMMMMMMMMM IT’S JUST NOT ON, BUDDY, IT’S JUST NOT ON UMMMMMMMM UMMMMMMM UMMMMMMM UMMMMMM

I HOPE THE POLICE AREN’T PROUD OF WHAT THEY DID, IT’S WRONG TO ****, THE MENTALLY ILL

UMMMMMMMMMMM  DISPITE WHAT YOUR REASONS MAYBE UMMMMMMMMM I AM TOO NICE, FOR BEING A FIGHTER

UMMMMMMMMMMMM BUT THIS ******, CHILLS ME TO THE SPINE UMMMMMMMM UMMMMMMMM UMMMMMMMMM

UMMMMMMMMMMM PLEASE, GIVE THIS MENTALLY ILL HOMELESS MAN A PERFECT FAMILY IN HIS NEXT LIFE

UMMMMMMMMMMM IF THERE IS ANY SUCH THING AS A PERFECT FAMILY

UMMMMMMMMMMM LET THIS DEATH, MAKE THESE POLICEMEN SQUIRM LIKE I DID, BUT I NEVER KILLED NOBODY

UMMMMMMMMMMM  HOMELESS, HOMELESS HOMELESS, I SAID IT 3 TIMES, TO STATE THE REASON WHY HE WAS CAMPING

UMMMMMMMMMMM IT’S BECAUSE HE WAS SUFFERING, HE WAS HOMELESS, HE WAS HOMELESS HE WAS HOMELESS UMMMMMMM


UMMMMMMMMMMM UMMMMMMMMMMM UMMMMMMMMMMM KILLING SHOULD BE WRONG UMMMMMMMM PEOPLE SHOULD BE GIVEN PROPER GUN TRAINING

UMMMMMMMM IT’S WRONG TO ****, IT’SC WRONG TO **** UMMMMMMMMM UMMMMMMMMM UMMMMMMMM UMMMMMMMMM
Katie the previous lives lady the world war 2 reincarnation



Katie was busy researching the world war 2 deaths, to find a Gordon Micheals, to
Answer some questions about Danny Reuben who constantly talking about world war 2 as if the fighters were total losers, who are just there to fight and not fight for peace, and Danny kept yelling at Katie to get her to find out why he has these thoughts, and Katie said I have been searching the web and I had this soldier from world war 2, who was Gordon Micheals, who actually did fight to protect his country, but then some Americans came up to him and blastered his head off, he died instantly and  then Katie asked for his date of birth, to make sure that he is Gordon, Danny said it was 22 April 1951 and then Danny asked why do you ask that, and Katie said I hope that you know, yes I am a trained psychiatrist, and if you don't feel comfortable marking your moods on previous lives I can be a regular psychiatrist, but I am a psychiatrist that believes that paychiatric disorders are problems with aura of previous lives, and I have fixed many people with these beliefs, they might not have believed in what I believe in ,but o did cure him, I can do normal psychiatrist business too, you know I listen and tell you what med to take, and I will see you next week, that works, cause I ain't a preacher, but previous lives is my belief, and really it does explain, your hatred of world war 2,
Danny said to Katie, if telling me my previous life helps get this illness out of me, I will talk, but I ain't sure what I believe in, though.
Katie explained to Danny that when he says he will hire a nuclear bomb and drop it on the English speaking countries, and kaboom, there all gone, and Katie said Gordon loved nuclear weapons, you see he wanted to start a nuclear power plant in Texas, but they said that nuclear is evil, and Gordon started to panic a bit, but then he joined the army, now I ain't going to preach, but if you find you have to meet his family, I can organise thatm mainly because it might make you feel better knowing his family is alright.
Danny said, yes I should do that, after I drop a nuclear bomb on Turkey, I hate that country, and Katie said no you don't, there is no need to start talking like that, but Danny kept on talking like that, driving Katie mad,but she had to be professional and say that Gordon actually has a nuclear plant named after him, are you interested in going, and Danny said, well, only if I could drop a bomb on New York, maybe anytime in the next 4 years, and Katie told Dannu that he doesn't mean that, while Danny said, yeah I did, cause New York needs a good bombing all over the state and Katie said we are getting nowhere, Danny, you sharent mean that, because why else would you come here.
Danny told his mum that he'll get help, because his behavior his horrible, but then he said he likes Katie and wants to break the rules with her, and they can both plan to drop bombs on the USA, and other English speaking world countries, and Katie told Danny that unless he plans to think about being Gordon, there isn't really much to say to each other, Danny went off in a huff, but returned to say a few words with Katie determined to beat his head being messed, but the sessions went just for 15 minutes, he still said he wants to blow up the English speaking world countries, but put that as Gordon Micheals revenge on the English speaking world, and Katie said that makes sense and continued to council him till he didn't need his help anymore, and it took 6 months, now Danny works as a Boss of a large Hotel chain,and Katie was happy to help with finding Danny's previous life issue, she can't wait for the next patient.
Brian Allans cry for help



Hi my name is Brian Allan and I have been kidnapped by a masked bandit,
I have no idea what he looks like because he grabbed me from behind, and
Before I could see him, I was kidnapped in the back of his car.
At first, I thought they were just targeting me,,but I noticed he had my friends
Brendan and Patrick, and they have been kidnapped for longer than me, and they
Are starting to look weaker as well.
I will look weak too, but it ain't my character to be weak, but this kidnapper
Calls himself the clean cut kidnapper, and suddenly as I am writing this, I am noticing
Brendam being beaten, and please someone save me, cause you can't beat up Brian
Allan, cause, mate, Brian Allan is too strong, it is one thing to kidnap me intially, but you
Are not keeping me. Cause someone will save me, or Brian Allan, me, will escape, so
You better make sure you are ready for my escape, you see, I am Brian Allan, who the hell are you, you see dudes, my hands are tied and they are hurting, but Brian Allan is tough, he won't die from this, I also have my legs tied, and I am suffering, and there is gag on my mouth so I can't speak.
The actual kidnapper of me, is Richard Swain, and mate he killed Paul Berenyi, as well AA Scott McDonald, and now he wants me dead as well as Brendan and Patrick, we are scared, and we want to be set free, because we are boys, and when me, pat, and brendan get free, we'll gang up on Richard Swain, and bash his little head right in, I can, cause my running makes me strong, and i will protect little Brendan, and I will also protect Pat as well, yes, I need to be set free.
Richard came back into the room, and laughed a weird heh heh heh, as he was looking at us ******* in his rumpus room, struggling to get free, and move on to the next phase of our lives.
Patrick was saying through his gag, I will bash that Richard Swain, when I get my hands and body free from this rope, Richard Swain is a dead man, and brendan said through his gag, I am normal, why have you kidnapped me with two intellectual disabled men, I am a kid, and when I get free, you'll regret the day you kidnapped Brendan Schultz, and Brian Allan and Patrick Enright, I just wish each of us can untie ourselves and do karate on these spastic kidnappers.
Brian then said through his gag, that Richard Swain isn't keeping them with him, and Brian Allan also said you aren't getting away with this, Brendan is normal, and this comes to a shock to you, me and Pat are normal too, and Richard Swain said, I know your normal, but I am a mentally disturbed man, who wants to kidnap normal young dudes so you dudes are doomed in this rumpus room, and none of you will be ever set free, heh heh heh heh
Pat and Brisn struggled to get free, because they are bigger and when they got free, Brian and Pat untied Brendan and very slowly got away, being careful the spastic Richard Swain won't catch them, they got away and after 1 hour they returned to their individual houses, and Richard Swain noticed we were gone, and suddenly the police arrested him. And after 3 months was sentenced to 23 years behind bars, while Brian said, you can't kidnap me fella, while Brendan and pat said the same thing, yes these boys were safe at home at last.
1.4k · Jul 2015
the jelly bean kid
The jellybean kid

When jelly beans was the things
All those years ago
I was Patrick Dunbar
Who was no chest oh no
You see he was the jelly bean kid
And he ate a lot of them
Yeah taste yeah taste
Yeah jelly beans are so sweet
The jelly bean kid the jelly bean kid
Patrick Dunbar is the jelly bean kid
His colours are red and white and blue yeah he is the jelly bean kid
You see he would attend the 4th of July parade and mate he was really
Popular there and Halloween, he played a disgruntled hansel year
He wishes he could get away
And at thanksgiving he brought his outfit to the front oh yeah and then
At Christmas he led Santa's sleigh
Out to go ** ** **
All dressed up as
The jelly bean kid the jelly bean kid  
Patrick Dunbar is the jelly bean kid
He will party like there is no tomorrow
Yeah he's the jelly bean kid
You see Patrick was walking down
Waving to the crowd saying howdy folks
And when he past the drinking crowd he will tip his hat oh yeah
Then will do a little dance and say
How cool he is
You see Patrick Dunbar is the jelly bean kid and said I am way cooler than him, who is the giant frog that is
And he sang
The jelly bean kid oh the jelly bean kid
Patrick Dunbar is the jelly bean kid
Walking on the street in the parade
Saying hello to the drinking folk
And doing a dance for the entertained mob yeah he is oh he is
He is the jelly bean kid oh yeah


Sent from my iPhone
The maroons scored the first try hooray hooray
It was converted oh yeah hooray
You see it went upstairs and it was decided the try is theirs
So the might of Queensland
Are the first scorers
But then after 5 minutes or so
The mighty blues scored their first and it was fun so fun
Will the blues win
Well that will only happen if
They can keep it up oh yeah
The score is 6-6
Then there was some silly moves but it was cool when the blues broke loose then the maroons broke loose
Until the blues broke loose to score an unconverted try
To make the score 10-6
Making Queensland lick their wounds
And just as the blues scored that try they took the ball and ran it down to score another try
To make it 16-6 poor buggery
Maroons what is happening
At present the blues are too good
And that was the lead at half time oh yeah and the maroons had a very close chance
But the blues are in front
Dude it is great
Can they keep it up oh yeah
Buckaluck
After a few of misses and mistakes the mighty Maroons
Are hoping to have started a small heart attack by racing in
With a converted a try to make the score 16-12 the crowd roar and cheer so loud
And let's hope this game doesn't disappoint the crowd
The blues make this slip up which could be bad for their chances of the second match
The score is still the blues up by 4
But more misses like that
Could be their destiny
It is touch and go for the blues cause the maroons are looking like overtaking the lead but the blues stopped them
As well as an injury to the maroons and this will
Make them conquer all
The hopeless blues knocks the ball on and the maroons get the ball back yeah
What is happening to those hopeless blues
The maroons scored a try to tie it up
And Thurston is the player to
Bring the maroons leading again
Yeah mate yeah he got the goal
18-16 to the maroons
What will the last 2 minutes hold yeah buddy boy the maroons are too strong and bold
As we draw the final curtain
The maroons came back to beat the blues 18-16
They were down by about 10
Mate but the pressure from the maroons was too strong
Cheer cheer the Queensland team the blues played like ****
But as that final
Curtain drew
Yeah we sink down our vb
captured in the psych ward ——  a strange word——— something to do with bludger



today ron has his hands full when a person came after tying an 11 year old boy to the toilet

and he started to get these weird voices in his head, and he couldn’t quite put his finger on it,

you see his youth wasn’t bad, there was a bit of teasing but his parents think the teasing could’ve

been the reason why he did the crime, you see his brother said, be a oh ledger, which made no

fucken sense, and it could be a strange name because he didn’t want his sibling to be labelled a

pheadphile, and ron was talking to him asking him, why did you attack that child and he said

because i wanted him to suffer for what my school mates were doing to me, you see my school mates

are calling me a ole ledger, which makes no sense, and ron said, maybe they are calling you that, because

they feel guilty calling you a phedaphile, or they prefer to not call a mate a phedaphile, and then ron said

or maybe they are saying young bludger or a dole bludger because you look lazy to me, and then the man got

up and said, i am a bit of a bludger, but i am not a dole bludger, i want to work, but most of the jobs i like to do

are jobs that this crime would stop me from doing, and charlie chaplin came up to the man and said, charlie’s my name

what is yours and he said, kidnapper bill, you see i kidnapped a kid named bill, and now i am in here, being called

a oh ludger, and charlie said, they are calling you what, and he said a oh ludger, you see i was getting teased all my life

and i took out revenge on them by destroying the life of a litte kid, and ron said, do you think you should tell very many people

because charlie will tell and it could make your time in here uncomfortable and he said, i can handle it, and he said, like when

i grabbed that kid, i felt good, i was just about to make the past leave my mind, because those teasers were horrible to me

and then ron said ok they called you a oh ludger, which makes no sense, why the devil was that word in your head because

it is not a word in the english language, and then the child molestor said, my name is gordon mcllumsy, and i am 23 years old

and i have been getting teased all my life, and my brother peter mclumsy is calling me a oh ludger, because he wanted to

keep it from our father that he thought i was a pheadphile, i don’t believe in having *** with a kid, i just tied him up and threaten him

if he tells the cops, well obviously he did, and he’ll pay for it, and pete, my brother said, your a oh ludger, and since that day my mind

was so messed up, i thought he was treating me like a family person, or a dole bludger or a young bludger, but now you guys have

arrested me, the voice has stopped but pete came the other day, and i heard the words oh ludger come out of his mouth

and i hear those words 25 times in one day, i am trying to relax in here but the voice of my brother says you are a oh ludger, oh ludger

and i told him, yeah a dole bludger or a young bludger or maybe even a sports watcher, because gordon was watching the sport when

that voice became clearer, and he had hallucinations of his mates at school saying, your getting teased gordon, we tried to push you over

the edge and now you are getting teased and ron said ok, and when these kids teased you, what did they say, and gordon said, they went yeah mate

to me every time i did family stuff, like play footy or cricket, or even when we played boardgames, and gordon hated that, screaming out

LEAVE ME THE **** ALONE, I AM A FAMILY PERSON, and this happened every day for gordon, and most of the time it wasn’t just yeah mate

sometimes, bullies would pick on him, by jabbing pocket knives into his neck or gut, or jabbing ball point pens onto his ***** and gordon said

LEAVE ME THE **** ALONE, I AM A FAMILY PERSON, and the head bully of the school locked gordon in the school store room, saying

you will be here overnight, **** and gordon wanted to get out, and eventually a teacher let him go, and then gordon told rob, i wanted revenge

on these bullies, and this kid got in my way, and since that day, i heard the voices, oh ludger coming out of my brother and mates, and i thought

this meant nothing, and gordon still thought they meant dole kludgier, sports watcher or young bludger, but gordon thought pete was a real little

smart alek and needed to be taught a very big lesson, because gordon isn’t really a pheadaphile, he was just bullied around at school by stupid

jealous school kids and ron thought straight away that gordon needs medication to calm his mind, so he chose 300 mils largactil at night and

200 mills serenace in the morning, and ron thought with talk therapy, this should work, so he gave him his first dose of serenade, and he was still

hearing the words oh ludger, which could’ve meant sports watcher or dole bludger or young bludger or even a special name so pete and gordon’s parents

don’t find out that pete was treating gordon like a family person, and gordon was walking around yelling with words saying, i am not a pheadaphile, please

stop treating me like a phedaphile and gordon yelled at anyone who looked at him when they watched the news which made ron come out and try

and settle him down, gordon said, stop treating me like a little kid, I AM A RUN OF THE MILL, HEAVY DUTY MAN, dudes, and then gordon goes to his room

and then hears the words oh ludger, don’t be a yeah mate yeah kid, gordon, be a oh ludger, which means nothing to gordon and gordon yelled out

LEAVE ME ALONE YA ****, I AM NOT A OH LUDGER, i could be a dole bludger or a sports watcher, or a young bludger, but i am not a phedaphile

that kid had it f..n coming and i don’t deserve being captured in ron’s psych ward, being shoved on any medications, i want the best, f..n rupert and

then the order forms came out for lunch and dinner and gordon ordered his meals and went to his room yelling at his voices calling him a oh ludger

and gordon said, LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE, then ron, who was terribly worried about gordon gave him 2 values and said just relax because you

are causing people to complain about you, and the ****** sent gordon off to sleep till his family, including pete came to visit him and gordon told his parents

to stay, but pete had to go, because, he can hear oh ludger coming from his teasing voice which forced me to being a kidnapper, dudes and ron thought

that maybe his parents need to understand what medication gordon is on and that he hears voices of pete calling him a oh ludger which could be a dole bludger

or a sportswatcher or a young bludger or a fancy way that pete says he is a pheadaphile, to make make you feel great, and we put gordon on largactil and

serenace to control his urges to abduct children, apparently he was taking revenge on kids at his school and then gordon spent 2 hours with his parents

and his parents left, and it was almost dinner time and gordon went out to the dinner table and at dinner time, gordon got what he ordered, fish and chips

and vegetables with a orange juice and a chocolate mousse and after dinner ron gave gordon his largactil and gordon went to his room, missed supper

because he was having a big sleep, where he awoke at 5 am, and he went out to the dining room to wait for 2 hours for breakfast and medications, but

he told the nurses he had a dream about being burnt at a stake, because he remembered being treated like an old witch when he was 13 and when ron

came after his lovely time at home with pizza and sleeping on the couch, turned up at the hdu to give the patients the morning medications and ron

asked gordon, are you still hearing old ludger and gordon said, yeah, i f..n am and i started by thinking they were treating me like a sports watcher as

i was watching the tennis last night, but i fell asleep, and gordon still doesn’t understand what old ludger actually meant and then lunch came with

gordon yelling at his voices so loudly and then afternoon tea, with gordon having 3 pieces of the cake and then dinner came, and gordon started hearing

voices in ron and the nurses, and that started driving him completely nuts, and gordon told ron, and ron decided to give him more serenace and start

by trialling eppelim on him to be taken at lunch time to reduce the voices he hears and then dinner came and gordon ate his dinner and then ron brought

around the nightly medications and then ron clocked off and bought lunch at his favourite cafe and went home and watched greys anatomy and fell asleep

on the couch, while gordon was still bothered by the word old ludger, but it was calming slowly but surely.
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