you know what i want to do with my life

is read my poems on radio

and leave more designs on how i can improve the homeless people’s situation

i want to move on from LEAD, unless they help in giving me work on radio

i want to get my art out there, in art galleries

i want to not do work that is pointless to me

i want to be noticed by ellen degenerous

i know i feel like yelling at my head when paranormal voices are forcing me back to LEAD

why doesn’t 2xx let me read on radio, i really want that more than working on some football oval

i am good at that, but i wouldn’t mind talking to people in hospital, like reading my poems

or stories or showing them my art

i want to do volunteer work, in jobs that make the poor people happy

i want my imagination back so i can give ideas of how to improveness homelessness

i am an artisrt a writer, and i can entertain on youtube

i feel better now i am an household name

more people know about the coopers now

and more people know about my life captured in the psych ward

because they are stories i wrote, i want to put my art in exhibitions

as well as find a way to make it in to Hollywood

i want to get paid to host a christmas concert, as long as i have a piece of paper with the headline acts on it, i can do it

i want to have *** with a supermodel, if i can figure out how to do it

i want more out of youtube, like get noticed by someone BIG

one day i want to get paid for going on youtube

i want to be feature act on poetry slam one day, reading selected poems, that’ll be cool

i don’t want to work for LEAD, much, because i can’t understand why they act like kids

i want people to NOTICE ME, i have great ideas

which are

start a mental health TV station

start a arts TV station for free to air TV

A hotel atmosphere for the homeless, in a small run down hotel

giving money to the struggling on the street

please, i am explaining that i help more getting what i want

this is what i want

motorbike motorbikes on the waves

it’s fun to ride motorbikes on the waves

riding can be fun, and riding is so cool

motorbikes motorbikes on the waves

you see he is like evil kanieval

he is like dale buggins

he is like any cool dude, who has walked on the earth

motorbike motorbike on the waves

what a cool motorbike on the waves

riding motorbikes on the waves can be cool

yeah mate yeah he breaks alkl the rules, and that is cool

you see robbie maddison rides on top of an ocean in tahiti yeah

yeah, and i was there in the end with my nice old beer

motorbike motorbike, on the waves, in tahiti, what a rave

motorbike motorbike, on the waves, it’s time to not have a shave

carn the motorbikes, bring on fun

give conserves a boot up the ***

motorbikes motorbikes, yeah we’ll have fun

yeah, up with surfers, having some fun

motorbikes motorbikes, having a lot of fun, ooh yeah

uncanny xmen said it right when he said he doesn’t want to work

because a lot of the bosses are big fat rich ******

they don’t care what the needs are nor do they care for they want to do

you everyone wants to work, i will do my art

everyone wants to work, i will do my art

art can be a job, oh yes it can

you see you can meet real famous people, if you concentrate on art

you see only rich ****** do what your bosses do

especially when your work isn’t up to scratch

everyone wants to work, i will do my art

you see everyone wants to work, i will do my art

i help the poor because the rich don’t give a ****

i want to give conserves one almighty hit

you see brian man nix said it right, when he said life is too good to work

doing art is much more fun, and if you do it right, it can save the future too

everyone wants to work, i will do my art

vic buckley, is a real australian big fat rich *****

everyone wants to work i will do my art

CAUSE ART IS MY JOB, GOTTA PROBLEM WITH THAT

check my art on art colony under brian allan yeah

you see doing unnecessary jobs is not brian allan’s stuff

i want to help the homeless every chance i get

even if i have to stop and say

everyone wants to work, i will do my art

and that makes me happy, i am an artist

a friend to the homeless a friend to the poor a friend to the young

in a way that suits me

everyone wants to work, i will do my art

i like ellen degenerous cause she is a cool party dude

she dances at the start of her show

and gives prizes especially for the poor

she introduces a lot of young performers

giving them their first big break

her show is entertaining oh yeah it is

ellen is a lesbian, but who cares, she is entertaining

i am not a homophobe, i believe in watching shows

instead of judging opeople on these shows

ellen degenerous is a cool dudette

her sow is packed with entertainment

and she dances like nothing else

she gives away a lot of prizes

yeah she is rad she is rad

she helps the poor

she shelps the young

if anyone is cool, it’s because of her

if i had a show on TV, it’ll be just like hers

ellen degenerous for PM, of coolville

it’s amazing how i could transfer myself into a girl


you see i have this problem of seeing on the floor

so i do the girl thing, and sit down on the toilet to do a wee

it works, because ire’s embarrassing to be a guy

so i sit down on the toilet an d wee, and nothing goes on the floor

i don’t care if i look like a girl, it’s better than seeing my pants

and it’s better than being treated like a little yeah mate yeah kid

because if you have problems with seeing on the floor

you sit down and be a girl, and wee sitting down

i know it seems weird, but i am a girl

i have problems seeing on the floor, so i will be a girl

i don’t want to be an embarrassment to the guys or any other member of the human

i know i am getting help with my housework, by home help

but at least i am trying to better myself, so i will be a girl, to stop me seeing on the floor

because the guy life doesn’t work for me, so i will be a girl

do my art and sit down on the toilet, so nothing goes on the floor

i get fungus on my feet, because i am grotty, but i am no little baby kid

i am dealing with my problems ok, and if that means i have to be a girl, so be it

you see i hear voices of mates saying, shut up baby shut up baby

because i am too babyish to be a bloke, because the little girl life is better for me

i am no koomarri man, i don’t know how to be as perfect as my dad was

so i be a little girl and sit down on the toilet

i am a man who sees like a girl, cause the man life don’t work for me

i am a man who sees like a girl, cause i can’t help it if i stand ***, i wee on the seat and floor

so i sit down and wee like a little girl, better than the yobbos, hey

i am now a little girl, i wee in the toilet better if i sit down

cause i am not a messy little kid, no way hoizei

you see i have problems with cleanliness as well, so i am getting help

so i sit on the toilet to avoid seeing on the floor

i am not shy to be a little girl, aren’t i

hi dudes


i was just watching neighbours and i think paul robinson is going soft

because he is being really nice to his latest daughter and her son

and ya know what i think, i think that my dead dads spirit is helping in the

process of reforming paul robinson, i don’t know how long it’ll last

but it’s good to know that people can change, i am actually enjoying neighbours

lately, because paul robinson is actually trying to be closer to family and not

worrying about money, you see my dad gave me an iPad and a apple MAC

i know dad can be a tad cranky, but he does it over love, and i think it’s cool

to see this, i referred to paul robinson as a real big rich ****, but i think dads spirit

is trying to make paul robinmson a real family man, i hear horrible voices saying

dads not around anymore, but i can say, i believe in the paranormal, and anyone who

hates the paranormal isn’t the right people for me, i think it’s good paul robinson from neighbours

is connecting with his grandson jimmy and he is trying to connect with amy as well, i am sure

this could change, it’s just that i really am enjoying neighbours

you see dad taught me a lot about being safe on social media and i know paul robinson isn’t like dad

no everyone has different qualities, i said dad was like becker, as well, but that was when we were growing up

i don’t have to say i am artist, because i am artist

i don’t have to say i am a writer, cause i am a writer

i don’t have to say i am a youtube entertainer, cause i am a youtube entertainer

i don’t have to say anything, just do my writing and art and not worry about what the cool kids a doing

because i can’t understand why people want me to do what i used to do

all i can say is dads spirit is flying over paul robinson trying to take the rich ***** out of him

i believe in the paranormal, anyone who doesn’t, ain’t the people for me

f you worry about how you used to act do your art
If you worry about how many people you ******* just do your art
If you worry you will be like ****** nanny
If you worry about how many people you ******* don'T dwell just relax and do your art
If you are stitching your problems out of you just do your art
Even if you makes me an old ****
If you worry about you ******* people off don't Dwell and just have fun
Doing your art

am watching wasp sitting up all night
I plan to sleep when I am dead
and I live while I am alive
Watching wasp on TV
Pretty cool heh
I  don't care if dad not around
I still party on a Saturday night
Which is party night
Everyone is getting down as I blast
Heavy metal to the whole street  
And get kidnapped by evil conservative ****
But I can avoid that because I am a party dude

You see the shaytards are way better than dad because dad didn't want his kids to be cool and shAytRds do want kids to be cool
You see dad only used his positive attitude against me to make me feel stupid and ****** oathe I am like those heavy metallistsa and I said I was a hooligan to tease my father and make him feel guilty about not taking us overseas that would have been fun for us but dad is not as cool as the shaytards father because he lacks cool
Dad lacks proper positive attitude
And I have always been cooler than cool
You see my mate Patrick showed me how to have a good time but he ain't my father but he seemed a better father figure than daD and u respect pat as a friend you see if I slobbed my food dad would say eat nicely abs I an geEung dD say that now, why don't you leave me alone you great big old fogie because I like cool people dad is like John Becker always fucken being angry never being cool positive
Hmu believe his words were I don! T want to be cool
Well I don!'t want to show I believe in discipline and that is why I don't have  kids, but I will be a good father
Dad **** of dad out if my life and learn about being cool because cool is the way of the world
See us ya great big old dogie work on  Betty

they are treating goodes like ****, just because he speaks up for himself

you see people tell him off or call him monkey or anything else like that

and he is copping that much flack,

why does anyone do something like that to a great player like him

he is better than any player that has ever strapped on a boot

and it would be a shame to have him leave the game like this

i know they are just using biff, and they think it’s alright

but Goodes is the best player that has ever played for the mighty swans

i love the swans like it’s my life, and i love life

you see i will party with no man who hates Adam Goodes

the fiucken racist ****** they are, i don’t want to get fought over that

because i like people being nice to one another

cheer cheer Adam Goodes is the best

he can put the other teams right to the test

he will lift up his ****** banner high

right to the centre of the sky

what are the odds of Goodes getting treated right

by those stupid Melbourne ites

lift up your banner so high

and shake down the thunder from the sky


sydney sydney sydney

goodesy goodesy goodesy

why are people racist *****

i haven’t any idea, no why get ******

please treat Goodes with respect

because his origin founded this land

and let his loyal hand stand high

onward to victory

We cannot have the new kid getting teased

You see Johnny Hapleton wants to go down the mall
Mainly because he is tired of his little brother teasing him, oh woh
And his family moved into this business mans house
And every day his brother would tease him all day
And make Johnny scared to do as his parents wanted
And yes at night his brother would be quiet
Johnny was sick of it, and said to his brother
Do you value your life, cause if you don't stop teasing me
Just for because I like to e cool, I will come to you
In your sleep, and before you know it, your killed
And the very next day, Johnny went to the mall
And a kid who lived on the popular end of town
Went out the same time as him, and he made a habit if it every time
Johnny went to the mall, he said to Johnny, your like us, man
And Johnny said, I am the new kid, and the kid said your like us, man
Johnny felt like saying, I was a loser in my old town
But instead he said, I am a man, and the kid, ****** oathe your a man
Your like us, man, and Johnny kept on saying I am a man
And the kid said your like us, man we like you, yes we do
We like you the best out of your family
No one in your family is cooler than you
Your like us, man
Then Johnny said, but I am a man
The kid said, yes ****** oathe your a man like us
And since then, Johnny's moral was lifted so high
And when Johnny left the mall, not just at the start
But every time, Johnny would say I am a man, I am a man
And the kid would say, ****** oathe your a man your like us
And we like you more that your family and then the kid
Left saying yes, he's a fool, he fell for it, he ain't like us
And what Johnny heard was be a man, your like us
And really this kid was teasing Johnny, implying that
He is still getting teased, and he is nota cool kid to it
He should just sit there and jitter, but the kid noticed he jittered
Saying your getting tested , oh yeah, yeah yeah
Get ****** mate, and his friend said yeah man oiss off
And it took 33 years for Johnny to realise that
These kids hated him, but maybe they wouldn't have
If he behaved himself, yes that sounds so cool
Oh yeah, get ******, yeah man go
Doing his little kiddie dance to it, making him say
Get ****** mate yeah man moving his feet like he is
Jittering to a tease, so Johnny actually does get teased
But no one really is teasing Johnny
Johnny is in his own little world
But he knows that all now, but doesn't want revenge on them
Cause he's nice


Sent from my iPhone

The aliens are coming to turn young into old



If you are a reasonably young person and you want to have some fun
Make sure the aliens don't capture you and attempt to eat you up
They will start at your feet, after you have a walk
And then he'll put his slimey hand to your mouth, when you start to talk
No matter how many times you relax
You can't get rid of them
Because they seem to want to push down on you, driving you f..n mad
Every time you get off your chair
Your legs are so very tired
And seeing that your under 50, there is something weird going on
You could say you are aging quicker before the rest
But I put it to laziness, you just think that it is aging
And you are ****** fine with that
But now we say, oh yeah for sure
It's the aliens that are doing the trick
They push on your feet, and put pressure on your head
And making your hands move around like crazy
And after a while your brain goes weak and you feel so hazy
You need to tell someone, yes you do, cause you have to beat them, oh yeah
Every time you think about life, you hear voices you remember
And some you want to forget and then the aliens come
And be these friends flying through the air
Leaving you with memories of being teased heavily
Then you tell then to get ******, they say na
Because these aliens are wanting to tease you
And they will do it, and then make you f..n cry
So, the aliens would
Start nibbling on your feet
And then up your leg
Pass the knee
Up toward the thigh
In the waist, and the abs as well
Toward the chest, and now up to the neck
Then after the head he has eaten you up
And then he'll spit out the hair
Because he hates that, oh yeah he does
And now he has you in his trap
You will experience aches and pains when your old
And any thought of thinking young, will leave your brain
So dudes, don't let those aliens win, be careful
You don't get too tired, just relax and beat those aliens
The aliens aren't coming no more, they're leaving
Too bad, boo hoo to you


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Different Strokes reunion at the love planet, formerly Pluto


Gary, Conrad and Dana
You see our world has moved
From earth to flying around in space
For it might sound alright with you
But us dudes, didn't want to die
And now we are dead. There is nothing we can do
We can't be seen on earth you know
Because our lives down there are gone
You see we have different strokes, and you know
Different homes, yes, oh dude, different strokes to rule outer space
You see we're flying around, and we are invisible
We're flying without a care in the world
And those people who want us back on earth, we we belong
We just say, we are dead now, and that is not good at all
You see, we have different strokes you know
And different folks too, different strokes to rule, yes we'll rule
Different strokes to rule outer space
Dana'.  Yes it's great to perform on the love planet, it's so comfortable, don't you think Gary
Gary'.  Yes, it's cool and one other thing, what are you talking about Dana
Conrad'.   Hang on you two, we have reunited with one another, and Todd Bridges is the only one alive on earth, and we need to keep him away from harm, so let's sing another song
Dana, Gary and Conrad'.   You see when Willis Jackson real self was on drugs
I was so upset, oh yeah I was
Because we thought he was killing himself
And we would miss him so much
He can't hear us now, but we can stop him from doing this kind of harm to himself
And that's keeping Todd in the loop, about who loves him
You see he has his family, but we are family too
So whaddaya are ya talking about Todd Bridges
When you go back to drugs, ok see you all next time


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Smoky Dawson sings up in the afterlife having fun
                                   At rings of Saturn


I am sitting up here enjoying the night
Having so much fun
You ser every day I float around
Thinking about how to enjoy the day
You see down on earth, I walked around
Doing my every day things, and
In hindsight, man I really enjoyed that
Yes, I was so cool, I had my very own show
Which everyone like so much
And before I left, I marched on Anzac day
In the city of Sydney
But now nothing can happen
I can't suffer from a heart attack
Or stroke, or get robbed by baddies
You see, any robber that comes up here
We just blast then back,
You don't have to listen to protocol here
No, you don't at all
When you want to play cricket
And can't find the ball
You don't need to look further, cause
You just zap it in your hand
You see this club I am in right now
The club called Rings of Saturn
I come here every time I want and
Everyone claps me, oh yeah
I love my cricket and I bought that to Saturn
And it was very fun, yes, oh yeah
Now there is cricket every Sunday night
And sometimes Tuesday as well
So when the cricket is over, yes we all went
To Rings of Saturn or Jupiter Moon
And we'll celebrate like crazy, man
We will have so much fun
See you later, I am Smoky Dawson
You've been wonderful
Bye



Sent from my iPhone

I party with a bottle of coke
And I party hardy won't starty

Ya see as it hers closer to Christmas ya/ see
You see it's the time to get down and  really party
With corn chips and salsa
And a beautiful wine
And then head off to the pub to
Drink the painters turpentine
Yeah that is poison
Oh yeah ok yeah
Partying is the fun we have
Oh yeah mate oh yeah
I am family person who has a lot
Of fun yeah and I will throw a snowball at you
And you will say ahhh ****** choo
Oh yeah the party is on
It is on for young and old
And I am not old no fear no way
I am a young dude
Cause I like bring young
Young and having a lot if fun
Eating a lot of egg feel young
To make my hormones jump up on edge yeah the party is oh so
Stop treating me like a nerd
I know there is nothing wrong
With my kind of fun
So if you can't except it
Bite ya ***
Cause I party on with my coke
And I get really hyped up and I say
Party party party
You see everyone parties
And that is fine with me
O dance a jig
And I will be a grotty pig
Cause I love partying with my ice cold can of coke
I like partying and being creative
Except me ****
For I am nice


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The story of the year 235
The year of Kris Kringle the
Right wing Santa Claus


You see in the old town of Dublin
Back in the 200s there lived the Kringle family who were the crankiest family of all, with father
Donald and mother trish and
Two boys Lionel and kris
And Kris Kringle was the one who really wanted his father to respect his views and Donald told kris
That he had bogus views that only
Rich people would like, like at the age of 4 Kris Kringle was trying to plant money in the garden hoping
A money tree would grow and Donald trish and Lionel all laughed
At him saying you are a total loser
And you will never get what you want and years and years went by
And at the ripe age of 16, Kris Kringle wanted to leave his left leaning family and decided to squat
On the lawns of the country club
Saying this is where I will end up
Saying that I can get away from those poor bank robbers and
Enjoy country club life, and this country club has big Christmas concerts and chess tournaments
Boxing bouts and Kris Kringle
Was the winner of 56 tournaments
In that country club, they also
Brought bands from all walks if life
Kris Kringle was on cloud 9, thinking
That people who don't want to go to this country club are idiots
And Kris Kringle after several roles
Of playing Santa at Christmas concerts, he had these visions of
Throwing lollies and chocolate bars
Into the audience and the country
Club crowd were very happy and
Kris Kringle had other ways of making fun at Christmas like
Giving a big cake and have pretty women come out of it and kris
Kringle was on cloud 9 but at the age of 26 when Kris Kringle was moving into the villas in the country
Club a gang of train robbers were on their way to rob one of Ireland's famous old time trains and abducted Kris Kringle and made him a hand in
Robbing this train and Kris Kringle was in no right mind to tell these robbers off, so he just kept his big mouth flaming shut and when they arrived at the old 200 century train
Station Kris Kringle was forced to look as he is the ring leader and
Thru robbed the train and then
5 days later Kris Kringle was a arrested and sentenced for 35 years
In Australia which used to be a convict colony and Kris Kringle
Decided to spread Christmas cheer
For everyone on the island and
He parked himself a home in
What we now know as Adelaide
And his house is where Rundle mall
Is currently sitting and Kris Kringle
Got a stage coach every Christmas
And with 3 brumbies puliing on the reign delivering presents to everyone
On the island and it took 7& hours
To deliver these presents and when
Kris Kringle returned he dropped off at the beach we now know as glenelg beach and was there for the official opening of the glenelg surf club and Kris Kringle did this each year for his 35 year sentence and
The people on the terra Australis island didn't want Kris Kringle to go back to Ireland so they killed him
By hiring a truck and running kris
Kringle down saying we are keeping your spirit with us kris and
Every Christmas that Kris Kringle
Was delivering presents ya know
34 years he delivered presents to
People on this island, Kris Kringle's body was buried where Rundle mall
Is today and his spirit really makes
Adelaide come alive in the credit union Christmas pageant
Kris Kringle lives forever
I was Kris Kringle


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Home improvement randy leaves in a black kidnappers van



You see it was a usual Christmas at the Taylor's and randy who was 15
Was busy at the homeless shelter, each day, but one poor man, who was
Getting ****** around by right wing governments decided to talk to randy
And yes randy, being the helpful soul that he is, spoke and joked around
With him, and this man said, how about we meet down the mall, ya see
I really am doing it tough, buddy, and it would mean a lot for me, if you would
Meet me there, and randy, said well, yeah alright see ya there, and went home
And when he told tim and Jill, well they were worried, but they were looking
Out for him and brad said, dude, it's suspicious, I will come with you and
Randy said, no buddy, I think this means nothing and randy went to bed
Already to meet his new found homeless friend and the next day, his homeless
Friend hot-wired this black van and then randy left his house to meet him
And on the way to the mall, the man jumped out of the van and grabbed randy
And randy found himself bound and gagged in the back, and randy struggled
And yelled our, HELP let me out, let me out, but this man drove randy to a very
Dark looking cave, and inside this dave were Indian drawings and randy who is
Unaware of the dangers he is in, was fascinated by these drawings and then
The man drew a picture explaining the things randy is going to suffer from
In here but despite taking a while to catch on, he finally figured out that this
Man, was bad news, and randy now realises his life is in danger and this
Made him very scared, the man looked at randy and said, buddy, you are dead
In 3 days and this made randy so scared, he struggled to get out, and the man
Rang up tim and Jill saying he has their son, blah blah blah, and there is nothing
They can do, to save him, from this trauma, randy was scared, but he was smart
Enough to understand that this could be the end of his life, and he struggled
And struggled to get through but these ropes were on so tight it gave him rope burns
And tim and Jill said, I will withdraw $20-000-000 out and you can give randy back
And then tim though, I knew that this man was up to no good, but the man won't
Budge, he didn't want the money, well he did, but having randy was more important
That any crazy dollar bill, ever could help, randy was still struggling and it made him
Feel like he was suffocating and randy screamed, HELP, I need to get out of here,
I am captured by this homeless kidnapper, well that is whet he was saying, but
The gag was tightly round his mouth, so all that he was letting out was wool lobby
Weeeeeretrtyes, well carp like this, and the kidnapper was really having a field day
With tim and Jill, saying your son is with me, you will never ever get your son back
Cause he tried to be a hotshot cool kid, and randy is not like us, his elder brother brad
Is like us, and young brother mark is a ******, but little teaser randy, is mine, I have
This kid where I want him, right now, he will never escape, no way hoisei, and
Tim and Jill got really worried, as they tried to alert the police but the police had no leads
But they told tim and Jill that they will do their best and tim and Jill gave them a
Photo of randy, and told them that there was this homeless man, who randy was
Befriending and they are pretty sure it is him who has kidnapped randy, and then after
Tim and Jill explained what happened, well, yeah, but if randy wanted it, it ain't kidnapping
But there are more fierce charges that we can put him on if he has your son and if he has harmed your son in an way, like grevious ****** harm, it's still wrong what he is doing
And tim and Jill left and the police did their best, and then a call came in saying a man
Came back to the carpark to find his tools all broken and over the road, and the police went
Down to check it out, and the police said, well we have to alert the Taylor's cause there could be a connection between this van robbery and randy's kidnapping and as soon
As tim heard, he demanded that the police do a city search, which they did, stopping at
Every gas station and ice cream shop, asking if they saw the car and whether they saw
Randy or this man, now nobody can help, cause this kidnapping is so closed off from
The rest of the world and randy was struggling with the kidnapper singing the song,
We're not going to take it, no we are never going to take it, no we ain't going to take it, anymore, and I am not taking any **** from you dude, and as randy heard that, he was
Really scared, and screamed right into the heavens, **** and the kidnapper put the duct tape back on his mouth saying shut up, *******, you are not like us, no more, you
Are like an old biddy's kid, buddy, and the police were still searching and searching
And just as they were about to give up, they saw a van matching the missing cars description near the old fashioned caves, and went down to take peak and this man
Looking suspicious, who was the kidnapper, was trying to flee the scene, but the police
Were too quick and the other policeman searched the cave and noticed randy hanging
By his neck in the cave, but the police got their in the nick of time and they saved randy
And randy was returned to the Taylor's and randy had to have counselling and the kidnapper
Was sentenced to life imprisonment but if he was good after 40 years, he will be could get free, but the homeless man said thank you, I only did it to get a home and all the rich ******
Have to pay for my rent in their taxes, *******, rich conservative *****, and randy
Was having mojo issues from the ordeal, brad and mark helped him get through this


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The crowning of queen Avril


Just the other say Avril Fuller died who gAve Cronus a new face into helping the next generator learn about Brian Allan. And as soon as Avril got up to Saturn last night there was a party, Indian theme done in her honour. There is plenty of fun for everyone, like Bollywood dancers and great Indian food, and methane rtippex all over it, this was a fun way to welcome Avril fuller to outer space and here is slim dusty, with his song for Avril, you've done us proud miss fuller
You see young dame Avril fuller
You have done us proud
You lightened up the world with
Your beauty when people feel sad
Whether we are naughty or when we are bad. Oh Avril fuller old lady yeah
You have done us really proud
You see mrs fuller you are my dame
I really love you oh yeah pretty woman your family will miss you yeah. Earth will miss you so very much, but when you are reborn we will see more life, that would be great.  You see pretty Avril fuller you done is real proud and now my second song, I would lio have a green tea Roth Avril I would love to have a green tea with Av, you see she likes to keep her body healthy but still it didn't stop her from dying which says one thing to me. Don't say you will live forever. Cause that is not on, I would love to have a coke with her family, yeah the Fullers are do great, they make sure everyone is looked after, and then it's time for themselves you see we drink in the time of war. Mate as well In the time of peace, you see I would love to have a coke with their family cause to me they're good mates
And now we bring out our mistress of ceremonies to be crowned queen of Saturn. And Avril said, thanks everyone this has been great, I really really liked being welcomed up here. And I guarantee there will loads of stuff to do up here for everyone to party, ya know Bollywood style
It will be so much fun and I give Tony and Judith a big kiss, then Avril decided to grab Tony by the hand and did a little Bollywood, that was a great dance session for them and then Judith joined in and boy did they have a wow of a time, it was ****** cool, everyone was really happy and Tony and Judith were happy that Avril had found her home on saturn, ready to enter her next life in 9 months, it just sounds so cool mate


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The kidnapping of Brian Allan and Ryan Clark


You see this masked bandit was roaming around the streets of Sydney trying to catch Ryan Clark cause he had this obsession sign he surfer dude, Sam Marahall, and he pulled up on Bondi beach and grabbed Ryan Clark and tied him up and put him in the back bad then decided to go to Canberra to catch Brian Allan who tried to be like Sam in the sports boy bit, ya see Brian Allan started the phantom league and as he left this masked bandit put his hand around Brian Allan's mouth and pulled him in his can and for Brian it felt like being in the back with his brother but now he is with Ryan Clark and this masked bandit has it in his mind to lock these two boys in his bedroom as he goes our avid gets more little cool kids, so he can get rid of thst nonsense of the streets, and get the days back to the dinosaurs years, you see Ryan Clark was very scared and for the first time in his life, he showed his big muscly legs and they were ****** white and Brian Allan showed his muscle legs too and the bandit wanted to chop both these sportswatchers heads off
And he will do it now, and then Mark Marlor went past him and said, your a ******* mate, and he grabbed Mark and threw him in the bedroom as well, yes Brian and Ryan and Mark were trapped forever and ever,
And you all will never escape


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Whose to blame for the homebodies being trapped by street people, Ted of course, he is



You see I had a great life being a homebody making fun of people on the street, but to those street kids, the homebodies are known as shy boys, and Ted every day when the homebodies got to their houses, heh heh heh heh, you homebodies are trapped, we aren't going to ever set them free, because the street kids wanted to take the homebodies to the underpass, and not necessary **** them, just change the homebodies from being homebodies to shy people, because these homebodies didn't really want to play on the street, and when the street kids came over and teased them, the homebodies ran inside saying, you can't get us fella, Ted had fun at this moment, making sure that these homebodies act too shy to be homebodies, and one went away saying that they will never catch him, and despite Ted trying, even to this day to get him, he had never been caught, while Ted has his friend have a few problems like getting teased in the way he did as a kid, because they wanted to stop him from being a homebody, and it was easy to stop him, because Ted has him right where he wants him, and every time he goes home,  they tease him to try to make him go out and get drunk and make trouble for the families, and he got drunk every day, causing trouble every day, and people on the street said, that he wasn't a cool homebody anymore, and if he tries to do what he likes to do at home, the old street kids said they will try and abduct him and put him in a drain pipe, where if the water became high, he would be washed away.
And he yelled, HELP, about 13 times, hoping that a passer by would notice him, stuck in there, and hopefully they will rescue him, from in there, but when no one came to rescue him, he tried to figure out how to free himself, before things got worst.
His other homebody friend saw him stuck in there, and when he called his name, he sat there playing cool for the street kid, that he thought I was becoming, and then he just left his old mate their to die.
When this homebody, turned street kid got free, he got on the phone to one of his ****** mates, to go into his old homebody's house and blast his head off, and he said yes, to start but when he said he couldn't go through with it, he was mad and started to yell at this ****** untill he eventually got sick of him and said, go back to your homebody mate, your not like us, never, will never am.
Then after 3 months of not talking to him, he ended up being shoved in the back of a 4 wheel drive and driven to the edge of a cliff, where this homebody  escaped from, and never saw his friend again, but he didn't care either, because he was stopping him from moving on with his life, while Ted was laughing saying, he's suffering, and this homebody heard him laugh and slowly found his way back to the top, and told Ted, you won't ever get me, cause your a loser, and Ted got angry, and tried to capture him, but he found solace in creativity which worked very well, but Ted still was there, but he was a homebody again, never to ever be grabbed.


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You see I like being young, but I am pushed to being old



You see when I was 11 years old
I was a happy little kid, who loved
To play around and muck with other kid's
Then I moved to my new house
And there was this man up the road
Who grabbed kid's murdered them
Which made me very scared
But, you see he liked me, yes he liked me so much
He liked me so much in fact,he never wanted to harm me
He wanted me to be his friend
And try to keep him from doing evil
And he played cool for me with all the cool kids
Just because he treated me like an adult
You see he liked how I was too mature when I stood up for myself
And he liked how I believed real men's kids watch footy
And sit like adults, while their bros are getting mugged
But that wasn't his fault, he stayed with me saying
Your not a kid, no way your not, you are getting kidnapped
If you say your a kid, so say your an adult and we will treat you like one
But I told him, listen mate you see
I like being young, but I am pushed to being old, by you
So he got up and told me, that I ain't so tough
He said I will be dead, if I tried to be a kid
I said, listen mate, you can't **** or kidnap me fella
And I love to see you fucken try
You are a weakling and I hate you
I told him, ok I will be an adult
But he just left, saying your time is up
And the next night when I went to see the Choirboys
I spent the remainder of the night bribe kidnapped with shy people in a
Kidnappers house, and he demanded my parents to pay a ransom
For me to return, but I am looking like dying
Because, my kidnapper said, I have you
No kid will be kidnapped, because dude I have you
You see you like being young, heh heh heh heh
Yes, I am making you old, see ya later, shy boy heh heh heh



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I want to work at the baseball


Hi everyone, it's me again, and I am telling you this
You see, mate I want to work in the USA at a MLB game
I don't care what match, oh no, whether it's dodgers, or Marlins
Or even the New York Mets or Yankees
I just want to work at the baseball, man
And if I don't, I will get a little cranky
I want to help out at the front gate and check tickets, yeah that's good
And after the game starts, oh yeah, I want to sell ice creams
Yeah that sounds so divine, and everyone will like me
As I sit here waiting to sell them, oh yeah
I will sell to little Timmy, and Fiona, Nicole and little baby Clare
I walk up and down the grandstands saying these simple little words
Ice creams, ice creams, anyone for ice creams, only $2 for 1
Kids were running all over the place, trying to buy one off me
And suddenly this became very busy, I can hardly breathe
After that rush I told someone, that when I die
I will bring baseball to the afterlife, and any nut can play it
Cause up there, we don't need food, water or worry about being fit
Leave that for our earth, bodies to worry about
We can fly around, from planet to planet
Playing 5 hour games, and we can score very high scores
And strike out a lot as well
You see when Ronald Reagan died, he played baseball for Mercury
And he scored 1 home run and then he was struck out ever since
I also saw a baseball star, and he was ****** good
He got three home runs, and then after that he struck out
Their best batter they had, and after he finished doing that
He went into the tent, and he arrived there
When I started working there as a volunteer barman
Where I will sell the beer and spirits
I did that for the rest of the night
Right to the stroke of midnight, and I felt so good about that, oh yeah
And then our very first president, George Washington said, let me batter up, and while George was on Saturn playing baseball against Jupiter and playing well indeed, his earth body was playing at this baseball match I worked at, and Buddha made us meet, you George scored 4 home runs, and this batter scored 4 home runs, and this was the most exciting moment in my entire life
And I will always say to myself
I want to work at the baseball, where I can feel I can really become involved with a sport as good as this, oh yeah


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Anthony and Mark reading a poem on Saturn



You see fellas we are both out of the problem planet earth
And I can tell you, that I am glad and so is my mate Mark
As soon as Mark died he went straight to Saturn
And said hi Anthony, how's it going
I said the medications got you to
Well, mate now you are safe away from people who can harm you
They will never get you again
I will make sure your safe, and you will feel safe
If not now, but in the future, I love you Mark
And I watched those people on earth
Refusing to Cuddle you, with the problems you had
Anyway, I live in this place in Saturn
And my neighbour is great cricketer Don Bradman
Every night, I sing to him
Our Don Bradman, we're just like you,,safe away from pressures that Earth has
Our Don Bradman, as an earthiling you were very good
But Don Bradman, you can succeed more because you are so great
You can average 100 here, and no one will stop you if your any good
Then I told Mark, I know you like cricket, and you love music
And I have the great Micheal Hutchence play for me once a week
Yes, Mark, you don't want to come back to earth
You can stay with me, up here on Saturn
Where we can have a great time, enjoying every day life
And Mark I also have a St kilda player giving me Aussie rules pointers
And I can tell you, that Trevor Barker opened my eyes
I can play Aussie rules, so Mark , I will sing to you
Our Trev Barksr, you showed how to play Aussie rules
Our Trev Barker, as a footy star, you know how the match is played
Our Trev Barker, yes, we'll win it so ****** easily
Mark went up to Trev Barker saying Marks my name
And me and Mark are travelling all over the solar system
Having a lot of fun, cause really the only way you can get here
Is if you really study the bible back to front
So let's have fun, Mark, and really show Saturn how to party
Mark said, yes, the voices have stopped, I am saved
And so is Anthony, both are happy


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Everett street, Wooveburra


One day in the Mython town of Wooveburra, there was a working class street in the suburb of Kensworth, called Everett Street, where their lived former Mython prime minister, Jack Norridge, who was the most right wing politian around, and he only is living in the street because his rich wife took her and his money to make a better life for herself and her children in Sydney Australia and Jack was left penniless and had to apply for the age pension, and mind you he had nothing in common with any of the folk anywhere on this street, you see in one house is a family who can barely feed themselves nevertheless the luxuries they give to their kids, like paying for school camps, and Jack told them, on his day he had his second job at her and her husbands age, and yes, they tore strips of him, but them, they were doing better, which suited them fine, and there were no way they will help him through what he's going through, and in another house is Fred Gordon who was the librarian, and when he came face to face with Jack, and bare in mind when Jack was prime minister, he needed to fund his new freeway, so he nearly had the library shut, and now he's got nothing, he was in no way showing any sympathy for the man,,telling him endlessly, things like welcome to my world ****, and your not so big now, Jacky, you will be killed within 3 months, mate.
There was a young couple, what about 16 and 17 who have 2 kids and when he walked passed,,the young couple always wanted to chat to him, and they chatted about why the **** did they cut their grandmas pension, she had to stop giving us gifts, and then they called Jack a two faced slimey old cow, and Jack said, sometimes we have to cut back, then he said have a look at me, and then the couple said to him, your problems are ******* self-inflicted, our problems are just us finding a mojo that you ***** won't let us have, and then Jack was getting very nervous, and went into the pub and when he got in, it looked good, and people Said hello and when Jack asked for gin and tonic,everyone looked at him, and also one ,man said to Jack, hey are you former prime minister Jack Nortodge, and when he said yes, he laughed and he laughed at him and then punched him square on the gut,
And Jack said, I will get my lawyer onto you all partiers, in my day we all did an honest days work, none of this few drinker happy hours like you guys get, and then one drinker said, well in your day when everyone did a honest days work, does that make you different to the world, cause you haven't done an honest days work ever, so ******* right wing fascioust, and Jack left to go home seeing people throwing thier fists at him, as well as sticking their fingers at him, and then Jack said, I am going nowhere, so get used to me Everett Street, I am here to stay, and every resident yelled out, but our towns heritage won't be, you'll turn this street into Las Vegas, if we give you half the ****** chance, and then Jack went inside and all the residents went to the pub and tell of all things that Jack has done wrong for the country of Myth, and everyone hated him with a passion,,and that's what happened on Everett street this week, I hope you enjoyed it.


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My old friends want my mind to be filthy


My old friends want my mind to be filthy, you know ******* girls and making them cry and then having make up ***,
Then you go back to talk with them, they say don't be shy or a freak mate, just go up to a girl and make a move, I told then what about the aids virus, and I got no money for a ****** and instead of giving me a ******, he just said, mate, sometimes you have to live dangerously, it doesn't matter if you die, ya know, don't be scared, oh no, you can guarantee you'll be in a better place, than this ****** hell-hole, I told him I want to be liked and I want to be healthy as well, Maybe I will go to a better place, pal, but I ain't ready to leave, no mate I ain't going nowhere, and you can't make my mind filthy, I want to be more to a girl than a *** toy, so ******* mate, and let me be the way I want
So if your friends want your mind to be filthy
Just befriend them and find a new friend in
Creativity
No filthy mind for me, pal


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Trev is a young dude and he needs to be liked by all




Trev is having a hard time getting teased by his little bro Markie, who was a real little cool kid, and when I say cool kid, I mean he does all the popular things, and all the rough cool kids loved my his brother Markie a lot, and Trev, is just a regular joe who likes to just go down the shop and have drinks, sitting down talking about fathers who were fairly strict, mind you Trev had all respect for his father, but that doesn't stop him from ratting him off to friends over a nice cold can of coke.
You see Trev had a main best mate named Heath, who was a real friend, well at least Trev thought that as Heath always seemed to listen to him, but Heath wanted really to be a cool kid, while Trev just wanted to talk about the things he watched on the TV, and he said a lot about that new music show named Later with Jools and Trev said that Jools Holland was a real hero for music fans to see their favourite music, and I know that sounds like what cool kids talk about, Trev, who, yes I haven't told you, as autism, and he gets obsessed with music, and every conversation was about music and being cool calm and collected.
Heath, didn't want to upset Trev but really he didn't want to listen to every conversation about music, you see it drove him nuts, and Heath didn't have it in his heart to tell Trev, because it could hurt his feelings, but really Trev could throw a tantrum, and Heath cared too much for that.
So Heath became Trevs only friend and came over to his house every weekend to play with him, but when Trev bought out the toys and started to talk about baby talk, you know he was only 8, but Heath didn't speak like that, and even Trevs younger brother Markie who still was using his mothers pet name as his name at 6, he was more grown up, and Heath often tried to tease Trev with his brother, and yes they teased Trev, and Trev was getting very angry, but he kept on trying to talk to his friend, he said ' who do you want to win today in the first round of the AFL, and Markie said how about we choose the team you aren't going for, and then Trev told Heath to come to the shop to buy a drink, and talk about problems with our families, cause Trev was thinking that just because your family has enough money to support you, it still can be a nightmare trying to grow up in a family like that, and Heath, who was getting sick of Trev winging and whining, just said to him that he liked him, and despite of what he says to his brother, it is just a joke, but of course Heath is a kid, and he was a poor kid, so instead of saying what I just said he said, that is what he meant, he actually said, you know , yo, man, wots, happning, ya fams orye qui comply, which you know Trev thought was complete jibberish, and started to think that Heath didn't care about him and sort of gave him the cold shoulder treatment, and Heath sort of noticed the chemistry trying to actually understand, and said his jibberish, which was yo man wots up,
Yo dude, ya nid ta liten up, and Trev was tired of this language and started to wonder why a friend of his was talking like this, this talking isn't proper talking, it'total jibberish, sure he is nice to me, but he speaks this real spastic jibberish, it drives Trev nuts, but really, he has no friends, at school, but he was honest, in that he couldn't figure out what language he spoke, and his brother Markie who heard him wonder what these words were in his mind on his bed, Markie started to teaee his brother saying, you are so ****** *******, you don't know anything that cool kids know, you stupid old ****, he is being cool, you see, ******, he say, yo, ya doin nuttin rye, ya stipid and yo a fu-en ritarded, spaz and Trev really was hurt, mainly because of the way he said it, because really those words meanr nothing, you see they are just words to suggest that kids can tease people who are disabled, so they can't figure out their goings on.
This kind of teasing was going on for days and days, and Markie was a real cool kid, everyone liked him, yes, like all kids want, Markie was popular and then Trev and Markies father noticed that Trev was starting to feel low, and really he tried it make Trev feel better, and yes Trev was normal enough, but his autism kept him from expressing how he feels about Markie and his friends teasing him, and his father and mother sort of were starting to figure things out and when Markie got home, their parents told Markie to behave himself and stop teasing his brother, and then Markie jumped up and said yo da, u
No tes ma bro, u spikin I tun, and then their dad said, maybe, but he ain't like the other kids, he has autism, and you know he needs to feel like people care about him, and Markie  moved around saying I ain hippin he, and then their dad said, if you don't I will ground you for weeks, and Markie promised to make an effort to be nicer to Trev, and Trev really was excited, so excited, be started treating his brother Markie like Heath, and then he thought he was a cool kid, and yes, Trev wanted to treat Markie like a ******, but unknown to Trev, their dad told Markie to go easy on him, but Trev got hypo over the fact that he was a cool kid, kids even said he was like us, man, but still Trev was still too disabled to know young words, but it didn't worry him, because the time his new cool friends noticed it, they were getting too old to tease people that way, even Markie moved on in the adult way, yes maybe This is the time for Trev to be an adult and not worry about being told he's stupid, because only losers tease like Markie used to, because that is just childish, and everybody lived happy through their lives, even Trev, the end


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The people of Canberra, yes they love it, oh yeah

you see I come here after getting ribbed by *******
And teased by so called friends
When all I wanted was to be treated like a Normy
And, yes I did normal things, like watch footy and exercise
And I also ran around town trying to enjoy being a kid
Yes, I was made to be such an *******, I hated it
Me and my brother played cricket in the park
And these two dudes tried to scare us off
I am too fit for them, but I found one city
Was nothing like that, yes the Canberra crowd were nice to me
The first word a kid I hardly knew said to me, was your like us, man
Because he thought I was cool, to his point of view
And I made more school friends, and I found this so fun
Then, I made a friend who ended up going to the Raiders matches
When they started in 1982, and we had a lot of fun going to those matches
Cheering them on till their first grand final in 1987
And we continued it in 1989 and '91 and '92 and then their last premiership back in 1994, and that was the year that I went down to Mawson, where the Raiders leagues club was, and saw the team come home, and I asked my friend we support the Raiders, how about we support the Cannons, you see we play basketball, how about we watch it, the cannons are playing well, so we supported the Canberra Cannons, who were our local basketball team, yes, we saw players like Herb McEachin and Phil Smyth, and Jamie Kennedy and Andy Campbell, and my friend saw him at a course he did, and Willie Simmons, played for them, as well as the Alabama Slammer, who did a add for Captain snooze, it went, ' the Alabama slammer, through on his pygamas, lying on his bunk dreaming of the slam dunk, yes, Canberra was on the map, but like the Raiders they stopped playing really well, like finals well, and unlike the cannons are no more, but then after the Canberra Kookaburras were popular in Rugby Union in the 80s, I think the tune went like this, kookaburras play in the ACT, merry, merry, kings of the Union field was he, play kookaburras play, and we'll win the Sydney comp, well I think that is how it went, but who cares, because later on we got a stronger team , the ACT Brumbies, they were so cool, they won two cups, but this rugby comp was harder to win, and at the same time, the best Canberra team, who won the most cups, were the Canberra Capitals, who are the women's basketball team, yes, 10 out of 12 premierships, yes they are so cool, well the capitals run I think is over, and the Raiders have been doing well in the under 20s, but last year they did well and were thrashed in the grand final, Canberra looked doomed, untill something happened to Canberra in February 2013, and that was a moment that changed Canberra forever, you see I have been following tbe Major league from the USA, and I drove my friend nuts, you see the whole city of Canberra got behind the Raiders, and the cannons and the capitals and the Brumbies, the kookaburras, and we support our local Aussie rules comp, we have the best local comp in Australia, it went national, yes, that is cool, we made mistakes with the implosion of our old hospital, which killed Katie ******, and we at least haven't got a right wing government, back in the 80s, we had no government, but back to where we're at, in February 2013, Canberra changed, yes this was the time of the Canberra winning the Australian baseball Claxton shield baseball comp, from the wooden spoon, yes Canberra us great, and we are putting some great apartments up, to bring people here to live up to it's aboriginal name, meeting place, you see I met some really nice people at sporting events in Canberra, and I don't want that to change, you see Newcastle dudes don't have a good sports following like the Canberra crowd has, yes maybe they have the Jets, in soccer, and the Newcastle knights, but we have the GWS, yes they play 3 normal season matches in our city, so we are the boys in our wonderful city of Canberra, we support the AFL, and the AFL is the greatest game of all. Newcastle local sports is just Newcastle, ours include a miniature national comp, we have the Kanga cup soccer tournament, which is better than the Newcastle jets, yes we are the mighty Canberra crowd, we are making our city so proud, we have better stuff, like sports to suit all walks of life, as well as having the best flower show in the world, called Floriade, how many flower shows have people performing songs at them the way we do, and February has the Multi cultural festival, so let's celebrate the 100 years of Canberra, we ain't shy, the rest of Australia, just thinks their the best.
The end


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A dis abled man doesn't do a good job because they are teasing



You see disabled man just bludgers, and if any pretty young
Lady starts working to help them, they play with their hair
And quite often really annoys them, and it is not just because
They are playing with their hair, no they don't know squat
About how to get out there and actually work
Well, they will work, but in small lots and also
They will take days off to go to see parades
And then look at all the workers, saying
You stupid little ******, little fool
You are trying too ****** hard to teach us how to work
And you are making us laugh so hard
Of course whether he would say that, no one knows
Cause he is disabled, he doesn't really know any better
He thinks he is being cool with us
The best thing to do is have a lot of fun
And not get in the bosses way, at any time
Especially if the boss yells at them, or gets sick of them
Instead of keeping around them like them like a bad smell
Like the disabled man usually does, and let me tell you
He can display signs of anger and it often interferes with
Their work, and after that the disabled man
Will crack himself laughing if anybody was getting yelled at by the boss
Like he is in primary school, you know the way kids act when
You get in trouble with the teacher
The disabled man does work, but you know
Often they show limitations and also they are too disabled
To know why things happen, and I start to think, that
The reason why liberals hate disabled people
Is they can be angry little *****
When they ****** think they're right
The dis abled man will work but they still will act
Like a kid, when they are either told to clean up
Or go over the job again, because they are trying to tease
Yes,  dis abled men have no work ethics, still like school atmosphere, and
A disabled man doesn't do a good job because they are teasing


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Come on mate, get out of bed, I wanna muck with you, your cool now





You see Simon Catchwell went to bed, and tried to get some sleep
And his friend was trying to keep him up, because he tried to keep him up
Because his friend didn't want Simon to hang with him
And also his friend didn't want Simon to go to bed with the family
Because he said, that real men, stay up all night and relax
And enjoy himself and get kicked out of his apartment
But Simon said, no I want to sleep and get plenty of rest
For doing my stuff tomorrow, but his friend said to him
Be an old fogie, and I want to never see you again
Cause dudes, I am cool, yes, I think it's so grand
Simon told his father, ******* and go to bed with your wife
And then Simon called him a great big ugly snout
And said he ain't like one of the cool kids anymore
And I want some kind sir to rob Simon and
Then after that, keep him ******* in the basement
And never oh never will he escape, and, yes, he will be dead forever
His friends said come on mate, get out of bed, I wanna muck with you, your cool now
I don't want to tease you while your sleeping, you aren't like us, dudes
Because you guys aren't like us anymore



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You see I am a drunken *****


You see I am a drunken *****
I get drunk every day
And all my friends treated my house
Like a night club anyway
You see we'll drink one and then another and drink more and more oh yeah, you see when I get drunk
I have a lot of fun, teasing my folks to make them understand I wanna be cool
You see I am a drunken *****, I get drunk every day, and I really really party, yeah,man I had such fun
And now I go to the local mall and offload all my problems, they actually say to me, tell someone who fucken cares, then after I leave there, I head straight for the CBD, and wait for the pub to open, so I can start off getting drunk, you see mate, I was having fun teasing my dad, and I never killed him no, cause I just having fun, and he tried to take it out of me, you see I am a drunken *****, I get drunk every day, and I have so many beers, yeah I enjoy it so very much, yeah, boy am I so cool
Then the next weekend I went to the Raiders match and I saw the Raiders win and that made me happy, yeah
And after the game, I went to the pub and partied with all the guys and we sang old drinking songs, man we were having so much fun, and I drank beer after beer and another beer to follow, yeah I feel so cool, and all my friends think I am a loser, but that doesn't bother me, because I am a drunken *****, and I get drunk every day, I sink one down my gullet and after that, I through another down, I feel so cool, I am a drunken *****
And beer is the medicine oh yeah


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I love getting drunk at the pub on a Saturday night





You see I want to go out and have a good time
But I am too ****** creative, and I want
To enjoy myself at the local sports hall
Playing basketball, soccer, and aussie rules
And then we head off to the local sports bar
And I will drink a local *****, with a few extra beers
Then after that we go on a fishing trip
Where I catch the biggest trout I have ever seen
You see I catch the trout and I eat it too
Then I head off to the garden party
And as we go to the garden party
We'll celebrate with a nice rich bottle of scotch
And we'll sit up drinking and drinking and really having a ball
And then when we go to the local park
We say to each other, I am partying so ****** hard
And after thar, I say,come on dudes
This is what I want to do, this is whet I do
Everyone who enjoys being in the rich brigade
Says,,being rich is not the right answer for the right question
Let's get down and let our hair down
With a few more bottles of scotch
Come on mate, let's go out and get a few drinks down ya
You see I am not a yeah mate yeah kid
I want to be creative and be a real cool person
And after that, I say come on dude
And then after that, I see I have a few great chocolate bars
To ease my fucken pain, you see every time
I see the whole chicken legs looking so cool
And everyone says to me, why are you looking so hot, lady
Then I go to the garden party and have a few top beers
And then get topsy and turvy, fitting me with plenty of shame
Come on dudes, I love you so,,I think you are from
The land of the living and the land of the strong
So dudes please come on and watch me swim
My future is looking so very very dim
Yes, I am cool, I am very very cool, I take a few tablets
And I enjoy it and enjoy it, it's so ****** radical, dude
I ride my bikes around the streets, saying to everyone
Come on, let's party, let's party, party all the time
Come on, I want to see how many dudes you say that go like this
How many dudes you know you go like this
Not many, Aunt Psnny, not many Aunt Penny
How many dudes, you know you go like this
And then walked off to the trees and started to have a word
You see people say that everyone is watching me
And making me feel so uptight, and constantly saying to me
What, are you trying to be a young dudes are ya
Trying to be a young dude, are you
Trying to be young dude, are ya
Cause, mate ya still an adult, ya still an adult
You have no fucken guts, to be in this world
Really,really,all of you, I do what I want
Ya great big lug, and mate, you are a stupid stupid baby
And as I leave the old fogies on their own
The women are waiting for me at the local pub
Ready to dance with me, as well as have a few drinks with me
And we'll all have a lot of *****
And toast to the evenings and mornings of the night
Get down, dudes, I am really going to party,, party I say
Yes, I get drunk and I get drunk really bad
Then some man treats me like cool person
And says, be a cool person I talk no fucken crap
He tells me to be an adult, and I say, neh
And he tells me to be a family person, I say neh
I am a cool person who loves to have a party with a few bottles of wine
And I think, that I am the messiah of madness, let's get drunk
And we'll show you off to the crowd


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The day we got a discusting cat



You see when my grandmother lost her two cats
Named mitsy and Trudy, she was so devastated as can be
So my cousins Mark and David found a cat on the side of the road
And decided to give it to my grandmother
And mind you, it seemed a good idea
Yeah at first the cat looked very cute
But after a while it was horrible little thing
You see my brother picked it up
And it **** all over him and I was thinking serves you right for picking him up, mate
And then my brother put it down and went to the bathroom
And washed the smell out of his hands
And the cat tried to jump on me, but I said to the cat *******
You are a timid little beast, you deserve to be taken to the bush
And sent to greener pastures,
And yes, we'll sing born free to him
Or ding **** the cat is dead, you see
I **** on people and he scratched and bite
Yeah he was a horrible nasty, very discusting cat
And the moment we got rid of the cat, the family were saved
Thanks for small mercy's


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Ivy and Jean's visit at two moons on Jupiter



You see ivy and Jean went out in the after life trying to find somewhere to
Party, and Graham Thorne whose earth life is me, all drunk beer together,
You see graham Thorne. Was in the bar drinking and chatting up Chrissie Amphlett and
While Jean Allan is building a new mini mall, which is located at top of the Jupiter, you
See, with her creative touch, she designed each stair well, as well as the special food court,,and she helped build the Great new Jupiter department store.You see Jean Allan is working very hard, trying to keep Brian looking cool and functioning well, so Jean brought Brian's previous life Graham Thorne over to the mall construction site, to dig the first blade of grass, you see, Jean had waited for this moment since she left the earth in 1997, her current earth body, who works for the Belconnen Magpies now as a runner, but he hasn't got much of role, because Jean was busy working to build the mini mall,,and  this made her earth life very sure of himself, and Ivy, who was the head of the Jupiter town hall, said to Jean that she needs to put some marble into the cracks, making a beautiful formation. And then Graham Thorne poured the lacquer all over it, making it firm to touch,



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The end of another instalment of this little battle of teasing dad


I am trying to tell everyone I am cool and dad says you see still getting teased, even if you if you say that
You can handle people ditching me, but the natural fact I ditched him in a way, you see I wanted to make new friends and the friend I came in with just nicked off home leaving me to party all night at the firehouse, cause I thought doing that was cool, I realise that when you drink alcohol you sometimes feel a little shy as you listen to the music that sounds a bit sad but you bounce back up when they play a fast song like La Bamba gets played you start getting down and party down really hard and even if you down real hard, and I also think they treat me like a real cool dude and some men said I was a great ugly snout and I decided to say it too dad, but that was just the start of the little instalment of teasing dad, because he sort of concentrates on trying to keep his family safe, which is cool, and I love him for it, but I want him to realise that I did it to be closer with people my own age so I could avoid being treated like real old fogie when they pass away, cause I want my brother to have a good life and I want him to sort of not be shy to be a man., even if or goes against everything he believes in because we aren't invincible and I don't want him to be treated like me really, or try and do what he wanted to mainly because you can't change the past but I want his daughters to love him for the person he is, and I know that they are saying I am not a young dude for the way I used to act but I don't want the family to say to Chris that they finally got rid of hue yeah mate yeah kid, cause sometimes in life you have to do things you don't wanna do to gain respect, I got teased but I still enjoyed myself
But this another instalment of teasing dad, I want Chris to leave the old fogies on their own big, but I am doing that anyway, but that is another chapter in the saga, I don't want to be like dad to a tease but I ain't shy because I was really cool when I was young


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The fun I had at my new school




You see as I entered my new school, I was given the red carpet
By a friend who grabbed me by the neck and gave me tickle torture
And some of the older girls were saying keep away from me Brian Allan
And just muck with the boys, and then after that I listened to the 70s and 80s
Music on the boom box and I really wanted to hear it, he played songs from
AC/DC, and also from the red hot chilli peppers, and even the best from Billy
Ray Cyrus, and then some of the other boys spoke to me about going bowling
And others spoke to me about getting playboys, and also after that the girls
Were teasing me because I went to bed early, but I wanted to function
Well, so I can feel good and also some of the other families picked on me
Just because I was playing outside with my brother, especially when I was having fun
Playing football, you see back in my previous life, I played in the SANFL and
I don't have to worry about not playing footy in this life and I hear everybody treating
Me like an old fucken fogie, just because I want to go to bed abd get ready for work,
You see my friends are saying to me, through houses, things like, imagine what I would say
If I,,,, and he was so determined to treat me like a koomarri man,,even if I am still cool
And I know if he is still trying to tease me like that, he is living in 1987, where he is looking like a total ****** fucken ******, even if he ain't really saying it, but if he is, it just goes to show, that he is still living back in 1987, where he was actually very hip, but as a natural
Fact, dudes, I don't ever see him out, so I don't want to worry about lasers like him anymore, because, really, yes we had fun times, but, I mean, I have to move on, and if I don't see him again, well, dudes, so be it, he was fun, but I ain't jittering for him, no fucken way, I see visions of him trying to contact my brother through houses, and saying the kinds of things he said to me, he said, mate, don't be like Brian lately, I don't want to teaee Brian really, it just that he is unaware of the kind of old fogie, we treated him like, and also, I ain't a yeah mate yeah kid either, cause if he doesn't answer the phone, which I won't, it's his choice, you see, sometimes when he was young, he was too shy, and I wouldn't mind him hanging with me, but, he seemed to enjoy the family life better, but I never realised he didn't like Lyle, but, no, I don't think he is like Lyle, I want him to go to bed, because, if he works, he needs to sleep, to get rid of any sign of tiredness to face the day at work, you see, sometimes I hear my father and mother teasing me, because I am obsessed with evercise, and also I am obsessed with arty things, and I know dad isn't into art, but also Pat wasn't into art either, but I only want to muck with adults with an interest in art and not the rich ones, I am very interested in having art exhibitions showing off al, my art, and also I know what all my art is about, and a lot if it, is the fun times I had with my friends at school, I love art and I love to put on an art exhibition, and I want people to understand me for the artist I am now, and not the ****** I was in the past. I am aware that people are teasing me, but you can teaee me all you like, but who gives a flying ****, oh yeah, dudes, get ******, mate, get ****** mate yeah man, as you go down the dunny can, and that girl says, we're not mucking with you Brian Allan, no Brian Allan, we're not mucking with you, and the Canberra crowd says, your still like the kids, man,,don't try and be like us, I don't wanna do that again, neh, your still like us, ya ****** buddy, Bri,  urn, so sit there Bri,    Urn and do your stories, you see mate, your still not like us, mate, you are still an old fogie, cause you keep leaving me on my lonesome , and I will say, come on, you poor little baby, I am leaving you on your own, what's wrong little Patty, are you worried that I am not mucking with you, I went to pubs and danced with the chicks, I am still a ******, dude but I don't care, come on Patty, call me a loser, come on mate, call me a loser, come on mate, call me a loser, and then Pat says, I might kidnap him in a minute, but It was only Pats voice, in fact, it was Steven Bradley, who
Noticed my last life, Graham Thorne, jittering for his sister like a boy, and Steven Bradley has kept me in, so I wouldn't be a young dude, you see he went, trying to be a young dude, trying to be a young dude,,trying to be a young dude, cause you are still a ****** man,
So sit there, Bri.   Urn and don't move a muscle, you ain't a young dude anymore, so u don't want to tease you Bri. Urn, I just want you to lighten up a bit, because, get ****** buddy, yeah yer mate, your like us, but I might yell out get ****** Brian every time he jitters from now on, especially at work, but he is allowed to have music on, but, you know, mate, we ain't really teasing him, and  don't want to tease him, by ringing him up, cause I have a hunch that he gathers it might have been me, who rang him up, but, mate he wasn't like Lyle then,,but I was treating him like a mummys boy, because he is too shy to leave him home, but I heard that he might've moved out when I rang him up,,  I the hell would I know, we don't see much of each other much, you see, jt's nice to live on our own, but you should still go to bed when your tired, and you should make new friends,, and yes, you should talk about cooler things than just about people, but really, we just don't really want you to tell us your life story, but if you a creative keep it up, we're adults now, your cool


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The fun I hear in my head



You see I hear my friends enjoying themselves with a lot of beer and also I hear them getting ****** every day and it can appear they are mucking with me through houses, you know Patrick was a real mans kid who was nice to sveryone, and even to me, even if I was to shy to express myself back then, but still he was cool with me, I still hear him being cool, ya know I am a bit of a **** at the moment, and I hear him saying to me that I am still getting teased, but really he is probably just mucking with his brothers and cousins and probably listening to man heavy metal and head banging their heads together, like they are very very cool.  You see I know it might be hard for me at first because my way at present to be cool, is different to his, and I know he might not want to do tapestries, cause to him he might feel like a little girl, you see I know Patrick prefers to be a man, no he is not dumb, I tease him at work because I like him, but I don't wanna tell him that, because I don't wanna preach to him, no Patrick should just enjoy himself, and not worry about me, you see I am 44 and I want to exercise so I can live longer, I know how I used to act, and anyone can plainly see, that the only way to  get through it all, is through creativity and I am so ****** cool


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The kidnapping of Brian and Mark. Yeah they're both with the great gullet dude




You see one day at the Belconnen bowl, Brian Allan and Mark Marlor, were talking to each other, you see Brian Allan was 32 and Mark Marlor was 11, mark really liked Brian because he didn't want to hassle the kids, he wsnted to be their friend.
So after both Brian and Mark finished bowling, they went into the cafe and there was this strange man who was looking at Mark Marlor's shiny 11 year old kid legs and he noticed Brian Allan hardly any hairs on his legs, and Brian was a man, but because looked like a kid, the man wanted to grab him as well, so when Brian and Mark left the bowling alley, the man got out two bags, and into one bag he put Brian Allan, and the other was for Mark, the kidnapper said, I finally have, Brian Allan, yeah I have wanted that for months, and yeah, I really want Mark Marlor, yeah, Mark you ain't a fucken kid, then the kidnapper said to Steve, who was Mark's father, yeah, I will never give this kid to you, ever and ever again,
And he went to the Allan family and said, Brian, is now with and like us, you see he is now like Mark Marlor, no he isn't like Chris, so suffer, Brian Allan, man, you are not like usses
Anymore, Mark, you are with him, cause you put tape on your mouth, yeah, you are now with me, forever, and you ain't a family person anymore.
Mark and Brian, in the back of the truck, were yelling out, help, let us out, we are too cool little kids, but the kidnapper said, no, everyone else are kids, and Brian Allan and Mark Marlor. Are kidnap victims, and you 2 will never be free, and I will make both Brian and Mark, little young dudes to a kidnap, and I will fucken make sure, that they will never be family people ever again.
Mark was yelling through the duct tape. Stuck on his face, you can keep Brian Allan, because he is a hooligan, but let me go back to bowling, I want to say, that Brian's over, but the kidnapper said back to Mark, yeah heh heh heh heh, his funs over, but so is yours, yeah Mark Marlor, you are not a family cool kid anymore, you are a little cool kid to a kidnap, just like Brian Allan, yeah I have you both.
So the kidnapper was driving on the road with both Brian Allan and Mark Marlor ******* tightly in the trunk, and despite them wriggling and wriggling, oh yeah they were, the kidnapper didn't care, oh no.
And as the kidnapper drove on Cohen Street, in Belconnen about 3 in the afternoon, he noticed young 17 year old Brendan riding his roller blades down the Cohen Street hill, and then as he passed the kidnapper's car, Brendan fell off his roller blades, and the kidnapper got out to pretend he was a good Samaritan, but instead of that, he got an empty bag, and put Brendan into it and them he threw Brendan into the bag, and then the kidnapper went, yes, I have kidnapped Brian Allan, Brendan Schultz, and Mark Marlor, these kids will never escape, yeah I have them, oh ****** yeah.
Then the kidnapper went to his house in Mcgregor, and then he put Brian, Brendan and Mark into his room,and locked the door and said, heh heh heh heh, you dudes will never escape, you see, you three are happy kids, well, now you will fucken ****** die.
Noe Brian, Brendan and Mark, were yelling out, help let us go, please we are fucken being held for ransom, and we are three poor kids, but the kidnapper is threatening to **** these 3 kids, and them hold us all for ransom oh yeah, but then the parents of the3 victims, came to save them, you see they saved Brian and Brendan, and they were allowed to go, and told to never come into their area, but he killed Mark Marlor, right in front of Steve and said your kid is evil, so suffer Steve, and Steve said. Mate. I am glad you killed my son Mark, cause he is a little family kid, who is annoyingly happy, yeah, thanks mister kidnapper you did the Marlor family a favor, so from that day, Brian and Brendan tied themselves up to avoid that again and from that day they were trapped in there, and never to be adults again, the kidnapper was put on the firing squad.
The end


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Y, and a b for *******, the two little idiots



Y stands for YMCA
The ****** Christian *****
And every day they go around
And support each other,,oh yeah
Yes, it's so cool to see these people show off
You see the big boss from the YMCA
And the b for ******* which hang around at the club
And they drink their VB, as well as the Carlton draught
And also a tooheys blue ad well
And also have a nice cold XXXX
Watching the skateboards of the tele
Then after that, they head to the pub
And go crazy on all that beer

Captured in the psych ward
The crazy father figure


Today was a weird day for Ron
As he entered the coffee shop ******* about the short sleep
Night he had after the police brought in a crazy father figure in mate at the bendigo police station and at 11 pm
At night Ron was awoken to get in his car to drive out to bendigo and pick him up and take him to the HDU
And put him into the solitary cell untill morning and Ron then said
We have to spend all day trying
To find out his story and then after
Ron finished his cake and coffee
He went back to the HDU and started to hear his story, so he can be put on the right medication
And be healed and he started off saying he was Robert jones and
He had this pact to daddy one if his school friends who was a bit unstable, but mainly because he wanted to bully him and then Ron asked why did you do that bad Robert said well, I hated what other people were doing to him, so I wanted to get him out of this weird situation and keep him with us heavy metal young dudes and Ron said
Are you sure he likes heavy metal,
Not everyone likes heavy metal ya know, and Robert said, he likes heavy metal, and another thing too
He never felt hostile when we listened to it, but then Ron said, ok
Did he show you he liked sports
And Robert said yes, but he drifted away from that and I hated how he was treated at school, I wanted him to have a cool life and Ron said ok
Why did your mate make this so called (quotey fingers ) complaint
And Robert said yeah but he is dellisional cause as my name suggests I am like a daddy to him
You see he lost his father when he was 12 and I felt sorry for him and
Another thing too I became a good mate, like taking him to footy and taking him to concerts and getting in trouble with the security at night clubs and also joining in on his family  picnics , you see Ron there is nothing wrong with me and then Ron said why did the police choose your friends word over yours, there must be an actual reason and Robert said
He is a fucken back stabber, that us what he is, a fucken back stabber
And then as Ron was trying to figure out that Robert should go on largactil and haliperidol and see what it does and then day after say Robert told of all the bad stuff that this mate did to him like tying up a young girl
And punching his brother Tom in the gut and breaking his entire guns and roses collection and then Robert said he is the fucken one who should be in this HDU, not me and Ron gave him the medication and went home watched TV and ordered a pizza and fell asleep in front of the TV as usual and the next day he went back to the HDU to talk to Robert some more and made him more angrier when Ron said that they have to keep him there for a while but Robert was no snitch and
Said I am no experiment you see
So just medicate me and then let me go but Ron said ok and at the end of the day, Ron went to the coffee shop and spoke to the owner for hours about not really listening to his problems because his hands are tied and Ron was puzzled saying I gave him the medication and I am letting him explain his problems and now
I say my hands are tied and then Ron went home and got on the Internet to find out what illness he has, but he fell asleep looking and then watched a man with similar problems on YouTube and yes, I think this might be the answer to his problem and then he fell asleep on the couch and went to work the next day determined to beat Roberts problems and he will


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Captured in the psych ward
The crazy father figure


Today was a weird day for Ron
As he entered the coffee shop ******* about the short sleep
Night he had after the police brought in a crazy father figure in mate at the bendigo police station and at 11 pm
At night Ron was awoken to get in his car to drive out to bendigo and pick him up and take him to the HDU
And put him into the solitary cell untill morning and Ron then said
We have to spend all day trying
To find out his story and then after
Ron finished his cake and coffee
He went back to the HDU and started to hear his story, so he can be put on the right medication
And be healed and he started off saying he was Robert jones and
He had this pact to daddy one if his school friends who was a bit unstable, but mainly because he wanted to bully him and then Ron asked why did you do that bad Robert said well, I hated what other people were doing to him, so I wanted to get him out of this weird situation and keep him with us heavy metal young dudes and Ron said
Are you sure he likes heavy metal,
Not everyone likes heavy metal ya know, and Robert said, he likes heavy metal, and another thing too
He never felt hostile when we listened to it, but then Ron said, ok
Did he show you he liked sports
And Robert said yes, but he drifted away from that and I hated how he was treated at school, I wanted him to have a cool life and Ron said ok
Why did your mate make this so called (quotey fingers ) complaint
And Robert said yeah but he is dellisional cause as my name suggests I am like a daddy to him
You see he lost his father when he was 12 and I felt sorry for him and
Another thing too I became a good mate, like taking him to footy and taking him to concerts and getting in trouble with the security at night clubs and also joining in on his family  picnics , you see Ron there is nothing wrong with me and then Ron said why did the police choose your friends word over yours, there must be an actual reason and Robert said
He is a fucken back stabber, that us what he is, a fucken back stabber
And then as Ron was trying to figure out that Robert should go on largactil and haliperidol and see what it does and then day after say Robert told of all the bad stuff that this mate did to him like tying up a young girl
And punching his brother Tom in the gut and breaking his entire guns and roses collection and then Robert said he is the fucken one who should be in this HDU, not me and Ron gave him the medication and went home watched TV and ordered a pizza and fell asleep in front of the TV as usual and the next day he went back to the HDU to talk to Robert some more and made him more angrier when Ron said that they have to keep him there for a while but Robert was no snitch and
Said I am no experiment you see
So just medicate me and then let me go but Ron said ok and at the end of the day, Ron went to the coffee shop and spoke to the owner for hours about not really listening to his problems because his hands are tied and Ron was puzzled saying I gave him the medication and I am letting him explain his problems and now
I say my hands are tied and then Ron went home and got on the Internet to find out what illness he has, but he fell asleep looking and then watched a man with similar problems on YouTube and yes, I think this might be the answer to his problem and then he fell asleep on the couch and went to work the next day determined to beat Roberts problems and he will


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I am a cool punks kid


I am a cool punks kid
Who loves to party all day and night
You see I listen to heavy metal music
As well as stand up to what I believe in
You see having *** is really not my thing
Either is mucking around with the men
No I am a real punks kid yeah I will blast the music so loud
I am a cool punks kid who hates the dead people teasing him
He would prefer to live life to the absolute full
I like going to communty events and show them how to party oh yeah
I am a cool punks kid
I party all day I party all night
I party and I don't wanna fight
I want people to not mess with me
Cause I am a cool punks kid can't ya see
I am a cool little punks kid
Yeah mate yeah I am rad
I like listening to loud music and
Watching the footy and then I party properly
Like you get a can of beer and slam it down my gullet with people saying
Skull skull skull skull
I am a cool punks kid
I have loads of parties
And I get drunk oh yeah
Party party party like a punks kid does oh yeah


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The chocolate party
You see all the dear children are gathering around at the chocolate party, you see young bobby Brady
And his brother Peter were ******* in the closet and gagged
You see old mike couldn't understand my dear why this man
Would do such a bad crime
But little bobby Brady who was 27 years old and a really wild party dude and Peter Brady and his mate
Oliver clothes off and Peter yelled
Please free us young party loving boys who were born in a large Corny family but as long as they like partying that is fine
Partying with alcohol and sugar
Yeah let's party to the sound of the flute and party with the sound of poems read by some of the city's finest poets that you've ever seen
And bobby and Peter struggled their way through the rope and gag
Yeah this is so dangerous as
As mr Thomas carbuncle who was
The Brady's hair dresser since Peter Brady was a young attractive sensitive new age guy
Yeah sensitive sensitive sensitive
New age guy for my love oh yeah
And Greg untied Peter and bobby
As they let out a really big smile
And that smile was just stopped by a filthy man's grotty hand and Peter said I am ******* near a pretty girl
Ya know hand cuffed so to speak
And every hour of the five Peter was *******, it made his body feel really weak really really weak as, dudes
And when Peter was let go dudes
They all went to the ******* to really party hardy won't ****** stardy dudes


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If you party right
Into the night
You could get into a very big fight
That is not called for
We must stop it now
So young dudes stop fighting or
I will get my whip
Because violence doesn't solve anything no ****** fear
You see we are individuals
Who control your life
Whether you get in fights with siblings or maybe your wife
Ya see it is the tight time to make your own mind up
Ya see we like to party
All through the day
With bourbon and scotch and a
Bottle of port yeah that sounds so right and Little Peter Brady
Ya know he is a puny little kid
You see he always makes great comments to get kidnappers kidnapping him
And this sounds like great fun
To kidnap Peter
And exerminate his mind and
People say I am like my brother
Because I am big enough for them
You see it is better than being a Little sewing off a hem and I know they are treating me like my brother
Because I am a cool kid man


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Easter party on Saturn


Hi dudes, Briano Alliano at the Saturn club rings and today we have
A few Easter numbers for the cosmic
Sleepers and dead from earth
The first song is Easter is a festival for all

You see we have clowns and bunnies and chickens and
A big Easter egg to crack
You see as we crack it
The chocolate goes everywhere
And the smarties come right out
Saying party over Easter
Party over Easter it's ever do fun
To party over Easter
The Easter bunny, is coming a running over to the Easter party now
So you dudes up here can share Easter till the kind folk find a way
To contact you, so we can party all night
And now here is our next Easter song
Ok it's Easter and you know it celebrate
It's Easter and you know it celebrate
You see Easter is a time to celebrate
With hot cross buns and eggs with colour
It's Easter and you know it
Celebrate
You see it's Easter and you know it
We'll party on
It's Easter and you know it
We'll party on
You see the fabulous Easter bunny , man
Brings the Easter eggs to celebrate
With his clan
It's Easter and you know it
We 'll party on
And now, dudes here is our next song called here comes Peter cottontail
Here comes Peter cottontail
Running down the bunny trail
Picking up the eggs from everywhere
You see he has a powder puff tail
And he enjoys eating snails
From the garden of the queen of hearts every single day
Here comes Peter cotton tail
Up and down the bunny trail
Yeah this is the best Easter that we ever had
Hopping down the Easter trail dropping eggs in each basket oh yeah
Peter Peter little baby Peter
Mighty Peter cottontail skips
Down the trail saying happy Easter
Happy Easter.to us all

And now here is our next Easter song Easter is living living is loving
And a loving family sharing a meal

Celebration a time to party With coloured eggs and chocolate bunnies and a hot cross bin to share
Over a cup of coffee or a dessert for a lovely meal down the club with people you know and love
And then we celebrate a day
For the families who had a rabbit in their house last night or the day
Jesus rose from the dead
Out of his bed, it felt like more of a sleep than death but the bible stayed it as death but Jesus reincarnated on Easter into a few of the farms animals and some people at the dinner table agree with that and some don't agree and it starts an
Easter religion feud ending with
A big happy Easter happy Easter
Happy Easter. And a happy Easter
To all and to all a great night
Then grandmother tells out to the kiddies I think I saw the Easter bunny leave out house this morning
And then asked did he leave you kids anything and then suddenly the
Dinner table had Easter eggs all over it but noone cared for it was Easter dudes happy happy happy hsppy Easter a time to celebrate
And it is a happy Easter from me as well
Happy Easter
And my encore is Easter eggs are tasty
You see we go to the shopping centre and we celebrate oh yeah
The Easter party is for young and old
Yeah this sounds so rad
The eggs are coloured in yellow and blue oh yeah oh yeah
The Easter eggs are tasty


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The jellybean kid

When jelly beans was the things
All those years ago
I was Patrick Dunbar
Who was no chest oh no
You see he was the jelly bean kid
And he ate a lot of them
Yeah taste yeah taste
Yeah jelly beans are so sweet
The jelly bean kid the jelly bean kid
Patrick Dunbar is the jelly bean kid
His colours are red and white and blue yeah he is the jelly bean kid
You see he would attend the 4th of July parade and mate he was really
Popular there and Halloween, he played a disgruntled hansel year
He wishes he could get away
And at thanksgiving he brought his outfit to the front oh yeah and then
At Christmas he led Santa's sleigh
Out to go ** ** **
All dressed up as
The jelly bean kid the jelly bean kid  
Patrick Dunbar is the jelly bean kid
He will party like there is no tomorrow
Yeah he's the jelly bean kid
You see Patrick was walking down
Waving to the crowd saying howdy folks
And when he past the drinking crowd he will tip his hat oh yeah
Then will do a little dance and say
How cool he is
You see Patrick Dunbar is the jelly bean kid and said I am way cooler than him, who is the giant frog that is
And he sang
The jelly bean kid oh the jelly bean kid
Patrick Dunbar is the jelly bean kid
Walking on the street in the parade
Saying hello to the drinking folk
And doing a dance for the entertained mob yeah he is oh he is
He is the jelly bean kid oh yeah


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Captured in the psych ward, Jesse Jameson' entry



Today Ron went into his usual cafe to buy a coffee and cake and

While he was in there he met Jesse Jameson who was in the store

Hiding from the police after robbing the local bank, and Jesse proved

That he was a nice gut, ya know too nice for prison and as soon as

Ron heard about the bank robber being Jesse Jameson, he tried to

Convince the magistrate that Jesse needs to be put in the psych ward

Instead of prison, and when Ron did the medication rounds, he gave Charlie

His, and Charlie said, I heard on the news that we might be getting a bank robber

In this psych ward, and Ron said, well, yeah, we could be, it is up yo the magistrate,

And you do know that you have to behave yourself if he does, because he could turn

Nasty, and as Jesse was in the holding cell, he was feeling the hooligan in his feet

In the form of an itch and Ron came in to say hello, and talk about,what the lawyers

Have planned for you, you see, what you need is, you need to be on your best behaviour

You don't commit any crimes between now and next Monday and, there will no problem

Of you going to the psych ward, you see I am bending over backwards and Jesse sat there

Scratching his toes, and Ron asked have you got tinnea or dermatitus in your feet, and

Jesse said no, it is the fact I am in here, instead of the psych ward, you see I didn't mean

To rob that bank and I can tell you why I did it, and Ron said, well, why did you, and Jesse

Said, well, I was hearing voices that I couldn't control, and before you say it, I am not

mentally ill, you see I am just a man who needed a few dollars to feed my family and Ron

Said, well, yeah, we have to get a psychiatric examination anyhow, because you broke the

Law, Jesse, you had a gun, you could have killed someone, you are risking jail time, and if

You pass the psych test, you could go to the psych ward, for as long as it takes for the

Medication to work and Jesse said, ok, so, if I pass the psych ward I get off in a psych ward

Instead of jail, what about my reputation with my mates, we used to laugh at the mentally ill

And Ron said, yeah, so I will come 2 hours before the court case, to give you a psych

Evaluation and then we'll see whether you pass to come here, but Jesse, I am sorry, you

Ain't fit for society, the psych ward is the safest place, for you, so psych test is your best bet

Buddy, and then Ron went home and ordered a pizza and fell asleep in front of the box

And woke up, and had to miss his cup of coffee, to go to the police holding cell to give

Jesse his psych test and after he did that, he gave the test results to the lawyer and went to

Cafe to have his cup of coffee and vanilla slice and said, ya know, that guy who was here

Yesterday, the big day has arrived, and hopefully we will get our wish of having him in the

Psych ward, but, I glanced at his psych test, it looked normal, and I said, this guy was

Hearing voices, and as soon as he had his food he went to the court to find out whether

Jesse will be sentenced into his care and Ron arrived at the holding cell, to pick him up

And drive him to court, hoping that he will get the chance for Jesse to join his HDU and

After 3 hours of being in the court, hearing god knows what, and when the magistrate

Came back, he closed the case, and said, I sentence Jesse Jameson to the care of Ron

Coopers HDU, suffering from schitzophrenia and Jesse thanked Ron, and for the first 2

Weeks Jesse, was isolated from the others till they have his medication right, but Jesse had

A TV in the room and he lied on his bed and watched TV and then Ron brought around the

Night time medications and that was including Jesse's and then Ron clocked off and

Went home to make spaghetti bolognaise and watched TV and then fell asleep on the couch

And Jesse was making noise all night, so much in fact the nurses need to give him ******

To settle him down and the next morning Ron got a phone call saying that Jesse needed to

Settle down, so we gave him a ****** and Ron went straight to the HDU and gave Jesse his

Morning medication, and said, you need to relax at night, and Ron left after Jesse said

I will try, try ******* you


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I hate being a hooligan
So ****** much
Don't treat me like a hooligan
Because really u find that hard
I don.'t want hooligans mucking
With me because they are losers
Ya see so won't ya leave me alone
Ya fucken hooligan
I am not a hooligan I am a writer
And artist and YouTube entertained
And in that I have a heap of fun
Please leave me alone ya fucken hooligan
I prefer to be around happy family chatter rather than being around
People who punch the seat if people
**** him off
You see I am not a hooligan cause I don't **** people off, I am reformed
From all that nonsense of the past
Please don't treat me like a hooligan
I am a family person
Always have been always will be
A family person everyone likes
Dad would say to Patrick
Look he's eating junk food treating me like a normal person


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Good things



You see Christmas is good, yeah the kids love it oh yeah

Getting presents of all shapes and sizes

And Easter is the time where you get hot cross buns and Easter eggs

Yeah, they are very nice

You see as you go to the footy, you get loads of good things as souvenirs

Like blow up balloons and little cards on who sponsors this event

And when you go to the shopping centre there are loads of good shops yeah

Like the taco bar and the aldi store and the fish and chip shop as well

There is a great donut shop, where there are loads of good things to eat

Like long johns with jam and cream and flavoured and cinnamon donuts, take your pick

Loads of good things to eat

You see the coffee shop has a range of nice treats

Yeah the treats are as tasty, oh yeah

You see they have vanilla slices and passion fruit slices

Yeah there are more, too much to mention

You see, the only problem is, which one to choose

Yeah, which one could attract our attention

There are loads of good things around you see

Good for you and good for me

Like the fine young cannibals sang the good thing back in the '80s ya know

And you here Santa going ** ** **

And mother says to the kids no no no

Because, they are only good things for 2 days,a problem to the parents pay


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I hate when

I hate when the people of Canberra
Treat me like a hooligan when I am a family person
I have some great ideas to make this city great like Easter parades with
Really cool floats and XMAS parades
With really cool floats and prolly understanding that taking photos isn't harmful to the kids
You see we don't have anything cool
In Canberra apart what conservative
People would enjoy
Like boring fun day in the park for Easter
When they should ****** well allow photographs
I am not using the photos for ****
I am using it to document the occasion so Canberra's future can be great and I am very skilled
In so many ways
I can so something like have a Easter bunny parade and have cool
Photos to take
But Canberra wouldn't do that
They are so square
Off to bed get up the next morning
I hate bring treated like a little shy boy, just because I didn't show much enthuasiasm as a kid
I wish dad  would get out of my life
I wasn't a hooligan in Woodberry
Dad was, I am sick of Canberra
Trying to push me down into being a hooligan, cause I am not a hooligan
I am a real life family person
People treat me like I am a real
Public nuisance or something
And I saw my old mate pat frowning
At me through the stupid powers of dad's ghost and I can't understand
Why can't Canberra get exciting
Stuff at Easter except for boring fucken ****** rug of war and sack races, so lame, why can't you bring the Easter bunny in for a bumper Easter parade through the streets of Canberra city, anyway I am a writer
Not a phedaphile I am a photographer not a phedaphile
I haven't got what I want in life because people have to make the  big boys with big bank accounts happy
Watch aaa YouTube TV
I can entertain I am no loser buddy
Why don't you try me on Television
I am no phedaphile I am not like the bad guys I am one of the good guys
I wish dad would stop living in any part of my past, I am sick of being treated like a bad guy when I am a good guy
The people running the Easter at eddisom Re total *****
Ya know rich ******
They should be lined up against a wall and shot
Because they are like the YMCA's liz
She was a big rich arrogant *******
They should fucken trust me
And hold big events at Easter and XMAS so I don't go into little events
Rich arrogant *******


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briano alliano performing on the moon



hi dudes and welcome to this show on the moon, and people ask me, how do i perform for you up here

and i said, i am trying to rid the hooligan from my body, my first song is titled, it’s my hooligan

you see it’s my hooligan, and it looks like i have to live with it

you see i had a puff on a ciggy and a spell with alcohol

you see i was an alcoholic dude, but i was looking at it as partying

because that is what a cool young dude does, yeah

you see i bought a bunch of cigars, but they were very strong, oh yeah mate yeah

you can’t enjoy a party with cigars in your mouth

you could get mouth cancer, if you don’t breathe it in man

you see people treat me like an adult oh yeah

they want me to do what they say, i said why should i

i have beliefs of floating up to the moon

while you losers are on earth, probably up here, but not knowing it

i am performing in every club tipping methane on everyone

i want to get respect from everyone on earth my dear

you see my body is so itchy, but that is the hooligan

of my past about 300 years, i remember blackbeard, i wrote my own story

i believe i am him , ****** oath

despite people saying i am not, i know i was greame thorne and patrick dunbar

but they say that, to stop me from living in the past

i believe i am greame thorne, and patrick dunbar, because i used to tie myself up something fierce

i was a football hero, from south australia, named the great albert waldron, **** he’s cool

and i was a great footballer back then, despite in this life, i never strapped on a boot

because of that i was treated like a hooligan, as opposed to an old fogie

and i said to myself, i am a young dude sure mate, but that didn’t take much convincing oh no mate no

ok dudes here is a great song

ya know it’s 3 6 9, the goose drank wine

i chewed tobacco up here on the moon

my dad said, you will die if you smoke

and we all are up in nirvana sipping methane

you see graham kennedy said to me

you are the pride of the afterlife can’t ya see

you come up here and perform like you do

and then you get a hanky and go ahh! choo

and we go 3 6 9 the goose drank wine

lyle called me a goose and that is fine

because back when i was young, i was a hooligan

you looked at his white shiny legs

and when a person came up to me

and made fun of me saying i have shiny legs

i told him that my legs show that

i am flat footed, and lazy to boot

3 6 9 the goose drank wine

i am a hooligan, who teases the olds

people are trying to treat me like

a shyperson or an old fogies kid, I HATE THAT

and now dudes, here is duncan

i would love to have a beer with duncan

i would love to have a beer with dunc

we drink in moderation

and never ever ever get rolling drunk

we drink in every planet, in outer space, oh yeah

i would love to have a beer with duncan cause he is no square

i would love to have a beer with patrick

i would love to have a beer with pat

we drink every drink under the table

and i tipped methane all over his hair, he said, THAT IS THAT

you see we drink in the town and country

to soak up the atmosphere, so great

i would love to have a beer with patrick, cause he’s a great mate

i would love to have a beer with baz-boy

i would love to have a beer with baz

you see we drink each drink under the table

and he will say this, BE LIKE ME AND MUMMY, DON’T CAUSE PROBLEMS FOR ME, NO

we drink in the moon and saturn and jupiter and more

i would love to have a beer with baz boy

cause he is learning how not to be square

ok dudes, i am telling you now, that, people want to treat me like an adult who is scared of life

i hate being treated like an adult who hates life

i want to be treated like an adult everyone likes

because, i love life, i live it to the full

i know i used to touch people inappropriate

i shouldn’t have done that

i say i put stuff on youtube, and a girl says, i have no right to do that

she is very very old, she will grow old gracefully

i have every right to put things on youtube

but not according to this girl, but she isn’t the queen

you see i don’t want to be a shy person, i am an adult oh yeah

i want to watch business meetings on TV when it suits

you see i hate being treated like a hooligan and a shy person, oh yeah

ok dudes, that is it that’s all and now i tip methane all over dad

so betty can be a normal kid, ok dude