Drained of all emotion,
I'm left cold, and alone,
deprived of sunlight, and all contact with the world,
I'm my own prisoner,
a prisoner of my own mind,

I have about a cent to my name,
and only a shred of my sanity remains,
is this meant to be the devils sick little game?
because I never said I wanted to play,

now I've been tied to a marionette,
and they're trying to make me dance,
but how am I supposed to prance about,
when I'm drowning in the guilt of my subconscious,
and bleeding drops of red on the stage,
for my wounds have opened,
and became wider over time,
for the stitching of this marionette was a lot less than percise,
and now it has putrified,
leaving me to bleed out,
and dance the devils dance,
for the rest of my ******* life.

Does anyone realize, this is the only life we'll live,
I mean, its common fact, we all die someday,

But until that deathly day, we have to make a difference in someway,
write a book, sing a song, teach people that they can get along,
who cares what you do, just make a change,

Oh mother dear, where do I begin?

I do love you, mommy,
I love you like a venomus snake,
in which I run from,
hoping to find shelter in my own mind,
I run and I run and I run,
only to find myself back again,
because as much as I want to distance myself,
from the mistakes you've made,
I find myself drawn to the idea of change,
but who am I kidding?

In the back of my mind,
I know you'll never change,
I know you'll only get stuck deeper in your current ways,
the way you need the ***** and the ****,
just to cope with the mistakes you've made,
because you've never forgiven yourself, for everything you failed to change,
and you'll never realize,
that drinking yourself into a coma, won't change a ******* thing,
but mommy, I love you, as you love me,
in the only way we will ever know,

We live in a small town,
you live upstairs, and I live below,
where I listen to you stomp about your little home,
you were never light on your feet,
and I can hear almost every move you make,
which is kind of comforting,
for if I can hear you, I know,
you have not yet went on your daily trip,
to that little store you head to every morning, around the same gravely time,
9 oclock the liquor store opens, and down the block you go, for your first dose of poison,
its not very comforting to know,
your slowing killing yourself with deadly liquids,

You my dear, are the reason I hate alcohol,
the reason I swore I'd never become you,
it all leads back to you,
the reason I can't sleep sometimes,
just thinking about the one I call mom,
and the way she started life mistakes early,
thinking about the way you started drinking at just barely fourteen,
maybe it wasnt your fault,
maybe you were lead to the bottle,
by some events around you,
can we possibly blame your mother,
was she cruel, did she not love you?
I will never ask you these things,
but may I say, curiouser and curiouser, I do get as time goes on,
who made you like this? or was it all on your own?

I can't help but believe you'll never get better,
you'll always be a mom by day and a drinker by night,
and sometimes, a drinker full time,
stomping about with your ever so heavy steps,
if i'd never met you, I'd swear you were a hundred pounds heavier,
just from the way you walked,
and sometimes fell, tumbling to the ground,
breaking skin into cuts i'm curious about the day after,
and you just say you fell,
you don't tell the truth,
I'd really rather you just say, okay, fine, it happened when I was *******,
and still drinking,
because as the saying goes,
one is one too many,
one more, is never enough,
which is why you drink until you can keep your eyes open, no more,
and then is the time you finally hit the floor,
to wake up confused the next morning,
only to start all over again,
this be the cycle of the one I call mommy,
mother dearest, I love you,
in the best of ways,
I love you so, that I can only be honest when I say,
you have a problem and you need to change,
but just the same,
I love you, as you love me,
in the only way, we will ever know

Collect your thoughts in the dark,
for it is said the imagery is clearer with the lights off,
Write out your thoughts at midnight,
for it is said that you are blind in the daylight,

Sometimes it is best not to speak,
for the silence tells all,
sometimes its best not to listen,
because you already know whats right,
sit in silence for a moment,
hear the ****** screams of truth in the night,

Self discipline is key,
for you must know how to act on your own,
to do without being told,

Sometimes sleep is the last thing you need,
because you'd rather stay up and think till sunrise,
think about all the reasons you have not to cry,
as you blink back tears,
remember all you have to be strong for,

Just remember, it is never cowardly to want to back down,
because only you know how much you can take,
for not everyone can bend before they break,

Whenever you want to give up,
because you simply feel you cannot go on,
let the stars be your guide,
they'll lead you onto the path you must follow,
and always remember as long as you focus on the moonlight,
There will always be a better tomorrow

Here you are down on your knees again,
and just when you learned how to breathe again,
but now here you sit, slowly suffocating in your misery,

What can one do to help you,
please tell me what you'd like me to do,
I'd love to make the pain disappear,
show you that theres nothing left to fear,

You've made a habit of hiding from your shadow,
instead of casting light on the real problem,
which is your inability to see, that help is availible, if you'd only accept the help your given,
maybe you should turn to your loved ones, instead of turning to religion,

For what is religion,
but one more thing to disagree about,
for everyone has something to believe,
but almost no one believes the same thing,
hence the problem with religion,
I just may give it up all together,
for theres no point,
in complicating my life,
with unnecissary beliefs,
in which almost no one would agree with,

Am I rambling, or actually speaking clearly?
and even if I am speaking clearly,
I doubt you hear me,
because you don't listen to anyone who could prove you wrong,
and that my dear, is exactly what I've done,
made it clear to see, that in reality,
the real problem is standing right in front of me,
and its the same person, I know as you,

Pain is avoidable,
when you don't make it harder on yourself,
for no ******* reason,

Oh,
or is it just that you want ******* attention?