Cloud

Morning was so simple, fat early

Two
We sat over shadow

Them
To leave without loving

Yellow
A sun drama in blue
Bird songs flying

Final
Evening and songs
Spinning and weaving
Death themes and jewels

Crowning
Sly sleep with ease

Then
Slide, smile dream
Slide, smile dream

I dreamt that a filthy mouse
Somehow climbed into my mouth
As I tried to pry it out by its tail
And somehow in this dream
I ended up chewing this filthy thing
That got stuck on my teeth like toffee
How disgusting
How disgusting

So I sat down to write by a window
That looked over this beautiful sunset
And every time I wrote a word
A crack in the glass would appear
I grew so frustrated that I thought
**** it I'll write anyway
My mistake
The window broke
And I got ****** into this deep dark hole
Of nothingness
of nothing
With the taste of the rotting mouse in my mouth
With the words flowing out all around
The things I couldn't say
The things I couldn't write

Lying on top of you breathlessly panting
(2am, nonexistent sleep schedule)
I almost said “I love you” which turned into
“I love...how you make me feel” you knew it
and I knew it. I almost ******* up.

When we wake up
(11:27, barely made it to morning)
you get in the shower and I stay in bed.
The morning feeling never lasts long, soon
you’re on the phone making plans you can’t tell me about;

illegal. Many thousands of dollars.
“Don’t tell anyone baby. Shouldn’ta asked questions”
But who would I tell?
You’re my favorite person here.

Long day, back in bed. I made you a fake pie
(12am, pudding and peanut butter in the fridge)
after you took me to see the puppies
(I didn't even have to ask twice to go).
Curled up around you I kiss your tattoos,
the picture you drew, inked into your skin,
of the woman you’ll marry
(you’ll have her colored when you meet the girl)
and you whisper you might get a few more curls added
a little more brown in her hair
but her eyes and her nose,
already match mine.

You started snoring
I turned on my side and had a panic attack.