You don't see what I'm putting up with
How I am lying here with gritted teeth
And a stomach full of acid
Creeping its way up my throat
You said you didn't want someone with a heart on his sleeve
So I tore it off and it stayed where it dropped
For someone so obsessed with looks
It sure was easy to sew these eyes shut

Are we moving in the right direction?
Someone who is strong
        You know I had a dream about us once
         And we were up on the roof
        I was afraid to sit on the edge
           But I did it any way
I've listened close for any sign of moment of betrayel in your camp

But not so much as a scratch from a mouse

All I see is your power

Your strengh

Your unwavering courage

As wind billows through your tall bright banners

Always a thousand reasons why not

With only one reason why


If I never would have read your words I never would have known
How you can spill black couldrons of malice, but show beauty still
You can open up the sky with your words
Build a storm in its belly
But still feel pitty if it rains down on me

I can feel your combat boots

On my front teeth

At my groin

Snapping my ribs

Still even then, you reach down for a kiss

I'm
Amused
Take your clothes off
Boot lace tracer
It's hard to face her
With her sole pressed to my chest
Homemade tattoo
Made you blue
Lemonade shade
Jaundiced and thin
The gods shine on you
And your polished black blue
Pressing on my throat
And your dagger presssed between my rib
Blood begins to drip
So fast
It could have been a shotgun blast
As you tore my mast
Spit on my sails
Wails
A clean ****
Black leather
Whether or not
Your gonna do
What you've been born to do
Betrayed with a kiss
Your miss
Thirty pieces of silver
And bread with no butter
They say shes a cutter
But she just wants the blood
Pulsing with *******
A torrential downpour of pain
As you cross that concrete bridge
To sin

You judge me
Harsh as sun on snow

If I am a wild flower
You came to me
As an early frost

So you picked me clean
Snapping her locket off my neck
And twisting my fathers gold ring
Off of my finger

Tokens of spring and summer and winter

You bit your nails
And paced the hard cobblestone floor


You buried me there

Underneath every brick you dug out with your perfect fingers
Tracing the mortar dust with your finger

You wrote a message on the floor

You stand above me

In your cold dark cellar

Your tokens jingle in your pocket

You lay the cold stones against my skin
And filled in the cracks

You sit at your old wooden desk
By the smoke of your little cigar
As you look with a glass at your new toys
And you roll the gold around in your fingers
You giggle to yourself


You look at the locket there on the wood desk
Smiling at its shimmer under the bulb

You find your fathers old chisel and hammer
Crude blacksmith tools
You smile

You smile so wide and laugh all alone
Whispering things you wanted to shout

You split the lock
With one tiny tap
And the pieces fell down with a snap

You laugh and smile your eyes closed with excitement

You laugh you smile

You whisper your shouts

Until you opened your eyes

A start

Your picture was in the locket
That once lay on my heart

expression
is
not
limited
to
a
flap
of
a
wing
or
a
vibration
of
a
vocal
cord

it's everlasting. instantaneous

so large that it's beyond our senses
and so small that understanding is effortless
if we allow

conceive a concept and project it---

only
the
pretentious
present
themselves
as
paintings
of
the
past

place your posture in the present. take it **** it reap it.

You give up on your car ride home




You stop at each ******* red light




The whole time you wipe tears on your sleeve





You wipe your nose on your sleeve




You kiss the back of your hand




You drove up on construction





There in bright lights






Flashing over the road





One word stands out in your head

When I eat my words
I eat them
with bitterness.

A whole
grape
of wine
couldn't encompass
the
sour seed of my soul.

I make promises
over the phone,
that I love you,
that whatever I did wrong
can be made right.

Just like those withered
scuppernogs
I think,
I can climb the vine
again.

But there is no
remedy
for a broken heart,
except pain,
and letting go.

So over dried tears,
I tear myself apart
over the thought of you.

Even in the burgeoning
night
full of fat storms,
I am malnourished,
and waiting by the phone
while my friends go out,
for your call.

Love isn't right,
or logical
or even compassionate.

Love is hateful,
but love
is
also love,
and the well-spring
of humanity
stems from that deep
acquifer
embedded in rock,
where you are the
drill
and
I am the spring-loaded
limestone
full
of
nourishment.

So bae,
come back someday,
let me climb the steel stairs
of your blue eyes,
because I've been out
and
about,
and other eyes have found mine,
but they have found nothing.

You have found
and mined
everything,
and I don't love them for finding nothing,
I love you
for your scouring
and
discerning heart.

So dismember me,
make me human,
I'd rather die mortal
than immortal
and
inhuman.