take a sip
take a breath
make a deal
& prepare to face
your depth

we've been dancing on
the fault line for
weeks
the earth crackles
beneath my
toes
& all you've left to
give me
is nowhere else
to go


hell is the earth on
which we've chosen to
live
& all my worldly desires
you can't want
or care to
give

the feeling of muted
rain
while standing beneath a
forest canopy
is the closest I've felt to
being alive
in many, many years

air thick enough to taste
& the sound of
your breath
playing in time with
the chorus of
all the life that sang
around us

& how I've given trust
to time
did not for a moment
reflect in the
longing for what could
never quite be
mine

but you still gave me
the courage
to shine
& I bared my
soul
without asking
a dime


now lend me your
wild
while I sing you
silver lines

I helped your mom
clean out your
apartment today
I thought I'd be
reliving
a nightmare
but baby, your blood
is all over this
city
& I can barely
breathe
in it

days, they melt
& mold and
settle
into weeks from
the night
we sat outside on
your front step
& you told me how
strong I was
but you were so
scared
that I was too
forgiving

you said you wanted to
take me and Davy
& get the hell away from
here

I laughed and said you
wouldn't last a day
with me
& my "crazy"
but you didn't believe
me, baby

guess I didn't realize
other peoples'
demons
are stronger than our
own

guess I didn't realize
I'd be doing this
alone

guess I didn't realize
some days are
better
& some days are
skin and bone

the wind breathes
a balance
of lunacy and jubilance
& almost carries
my black hat
along
with it's grace


today I've learned
& earned more
love
& less desire to
save face





& you ought to see
this beautiful
place

I've waited too long
to write to
please
now I've transformed;
meet
amitryptyline me

should I talk about
my life?
because I don't really
want to
I'm just trying to
fill pages;
to fall into a better
groove

what fresher breath of air
than one that's born
anew
I've had this book for
three years
now
& it's time I changed
the tune

sleep and drink have
welcomed me into
their
toxic arms
if I appease them any more
would you please set
my alarm?

sometimes the highest hopes
can pull you from the
darkest depths
& I fear
we're at the bottom

I'd like to climb my
tree
& live in it for a
while

& maybe someday
I'll come
down
& maybe so
will you

the grass won't be
so brown
& my eyes won't
be so full of
moon

her breath
was lost in the
beauty
of woodwork
that housed
the contents of
her previous
heart

every beat was
a gasp for
the air she so solemnly
beckoned

a taste of its
pressure before all
that broke
her

well, the ****** thing
was locked shut
in a former haze of
lunacy

& she'd taken full
advantage
of lush-ridden amnesia
to summon the
combination

cirrhosis sounded like
a fantasy ride
compared
to a resurrection of
the past year

& she can't open
the safe
she cannot open
what was
safe

but she's grown enough
to cling onto
courage
like it's her last
cigarette


& she doesn't even
smoke