i want to crawl into your bed
while it's still blue outside
and the sun has cold feet
because morning hasn't broken
and your body could curl around mine
like a scarf in the winter

Darling, I am not here to write about your eyes and the stars in them. I tried to count too many times and I got too lost in the dreams imbedded in your corneas. I'm not here to talk about how the sun only rises because you give it a reason to, because it still sets every evening so it doesn't have to hear your steady breathing while you sleep. I'm here to tell you about how you have words that cut me like a saw cuts bone and how my ribs are held together with cheap twine and my spine is duct taped together. Here to say that you make my heart race at a pace that my body cannot keep up with. I didn't come to tell you that the tides are kissing the shore every time you laugh, because that's not what your laugh is like. No, if the rusting of iron made a sound, it would be your laugh. There are no flowers woven in your hair - instead, there are hornets and their nests lay settled in your throat and your intention is to sting me every time you open your mouth to say something that isn't my name. This isn't about poetry I've read about the moon and the sun and the cosmic loneliness of every star despite the presence trillions of them in the same sky. This is about how some stars find your presence so alluring that they begin to tumble from the sky and this is what we wish upon. This is about bruised lips mumbling words carved into coffee tables and ****** fingers tracing the rim of your favorite coffee cup. This isn't about love. This is about you.

her mouth was
(it did)
i heard it
--and a whole ocean
went pouring

of the knit of life let's say there is something.

something so wonderfully to touch.

so beautifully easy.


Let's say of it fingers,
between its hair,
laughing.


Let's say of it,
with minute teasing brutality,
a slendering of being. instantly

which shudders
steeply into breathtaking darkness. let's

say wide our mouths to eat it.

(each morsel turgidly serene)

let's say dying(and let's).

die easily into it our bodies
as wan incredibly infinite destroying.

.














































                          "I'm sorry. I love you."








































.

To those who may ask, how are you? My answer is none to simple. Like an ocean I may say. For I too am filled with currents. Waves flow freely upon my surface. Underneath I have icy depths and the warm inviting shallows. I too am ruled by tides. The pull me back and forth between extremes. Dragging me to the whim of the earth and fate. Flashing between sadness and depression. Loneliness. Anger, to the other end, gods euphoria. Joy, happiness and optimism. And as any ocean does, it too carves out parts of me. Chiseling away at my edges. Wearing me down. Only to bring new sands to my shore and once again rebuild. That is how I am.