I lay down to sleep and I found myself on a cloud, I was looking down and I was proud. I saw men and women joining hand in hand. I saw the different races from across the lands. Each one was lending a hand and offering help where they could. The line of people stretched from horizon to horizon and made a rainbow. I suddenly awoke from my dream and realized the thing I had seen, if I take another person hand and we join together to help out and make a stand, then what I dreamed will be a reality. I saw a rainbow of hope that starts with me.

I saw love today when the sun first rose. I watched my dog lick my two year old's nose. I saw love today as an old couple  walked down the street. I saw the way they held each other so frail and gentle as they went. I saw love today in the hands of  strangers, as they ran to a car accident to pull someone out of danger. I saw love today in a kind and gentle act, as I stopped to help someone with their grocery sack. In some many places I saw love, yet I wonder why so many people do not. I wonder why they ignore the simplest of things, extraordinary love in so many common places. If only others could see what is evident to me, how much richer our lives could be, if only you could see love today.

Today as the clouds formed overhead, I went outside to watch the sky. I waited patiently for the rain to fall so I could finally cry. As the drops began to fall, I let all of my tears go. I released all of my sadness so that no one would ever know. As the water ran down my cheeks I felt the air becoming cold. I was soaked through all of my clothes and I shivered for a moment. Then my sadness turned to anger and I began to burn with rage. I finally ended up with emptiness as the clouds above began to fade. With each final drop of water that fell, I let go of all of my pain. I left all of my tears running into the earth as I finally saw the rain.

Last night I went to sleep and I began to dream. My spirit left my body and crossed beyond the veil of time. I watched the old world pass and saw a light that was brighter than the sun. I stepped onto a street and everything was clean. The air was clear and I could see all of the stars. I looked into a window and saw a video screen. What was being talked about I could not believe. There were no reports of ******, nor was there any war, only images from people living on Mars. I saw children playing and having a parade. It seemed unreal to me. Then I looked around and saw the city lights, I jumped up and took my spirit took flight. I looked over the earth and saw how it was lush and green. I didn't see any factories spewing out pollution. I looked for a hospital, but one could not be found. I only found a small building where people are healed for free. I watched and listened and found what amazing thing had been done. Science had accomplished the impossible, all sickness was all but gone .In a moment I felt myself being pulled back to where I was asleep. I woke up and felt so empty. I wanted to go back to what I had seen. I then realized that the world I saw was yet possible and tomorrow would begin with me.

I saw you die today, I watched as your body turned ash white and you gave up on life. I came running to find you but it was too late. I saw the blood on the floor, black as oil and I hear it still squishing beneath my shoes. I looked at your lifeless body and wondered why you gave up. Freedom was almost yours, if only you had waited a little longer. I know you reached out for help, but in the end you just gave in. I don't know why you did what you did. I ask myself this question as I pick up your lifeless body and carry you away. I saw you die today.

I saw you in the darkness one cold and snowy night. I did not know I would find you. I only knew what was right. Though I didn't know you, I lent a help hand. I offered you safety and a way to get back home. In one moment you were there then in another you were gone. I do not know who you are or where you came from. I only know what you needed and what had to be done. I gave you back your life and sent you on your way. It is my hope that you one day would do the same. When you find some lost soul, in a dark and terrible place. Please be their light and send them on their way. If you will do for them, what I did for you. Then the light of kindness I show you in the darkness, will never be put out. This will make the world a better place, of this I have doubt.

As I look at the face of another person, I see my own reflection. I realize that we are both human and that the basic truth is that we are not different at all. So to be honest with myself is to admit that I should treat any other human just as I treat myself.

To the person that is thirsty I shall give water to drink. To those who are hungry I will give them that they may eat. To those who are lonely I will be a comfort and a friend. To those that have no hope, I will show them the way forward. As often as I may, to those that are in need. I will do that which I can, I shall be a blessing indeed.

I shall become a rock, quarried out of the earth. I shall be hard and weather worn. I shall be a solid foundation upon which you can build. I shall be steady in the storm. Though the wind blows upon me and the cold and heat test me, I shall be the corner stone. On my sacrifices and trials others can build. Upon my accomplishments they can rise above and beyond. I shall be the pavement stone upon which another can walk. I will be the rock on which they can climb higher. To all who seek to surpass what I have done and create a better world, I shall be a foundation stone.

From the cup of redemption I shall partake. Through the true vine I shall be pressed in the vat. The wine of mercy shall flow from the grapes of the cluster that comes from the vine of salvation. Grafted into the vineyard as a wild cutting, I was made part of the true vine. By the hand of the husbandman who keeps the vineyard, shall the new wine be pressed. From the cup of this I shall partake in remembrance of he that died and was resurrected. I shall drink of the vine at his table, when he returns to bring salvation to me.

The floral arrangements will be lovely when they lay me to rest. The mourners will be very somber and waiting to pay their respect. The casket will be lain open for all the world to see. Alas, life has finally gotten the better of me. There will be plenty of tissues for those who choose to weep and for those who snicker at my demise, there will be free drinks at my wake, but before anyone gets a sip or sheds a single tear. I will bid my own farewell as I eulogize myself. Attendance will be mandatory if you want to be in my will. I will not take a lot of time, just a few choice words will I have to say, but by the end of my own sermon, where I speak my mind. Some of those in attendance will be surprise and others will say that's just about right. So all I ask if a few moments of your time, then some of you will inherit my stuff and others can get drunk on my dime. For after I eulogize, myself, I want all to have a good time.

When the night is long and day seems far away, I shall praise him. In times of sorrow when my heart is breaking, I shall praise him. When the heavens are silent in response to my prayers, I shall praise him. In all things, I shall ever praise God.

When the tides of live overflow, I shall rise above the fray. When the storms of life shall churn the deep, I will hold steadfast to my course. When the rivers shall run deep and over flow their banks, I will be calm among the rising tide. I shall wait upon the lord and shall be lifted up over the ebb and flow of troubled waters and I shall walk by his side on the waters and through the turmoil of life's seas.

When the wind turns against me and the water begins to rage. When the night comes on quickly and the light of the heavens is canceled out. I will stand firm on my foundation, I will not fear or wavier. I shall hold fast to the rock that holds me up. I will look to the day star and hold on until morning breaks. In the lord I will trust as I weather the storm.

When you are hurting, I will shed my tears. When you find joy, I will cry in happiness. When you are unsure, I will anguish with you. When you lose your way, I will cry out in tears to heaven. When you come home, I will welcome you with tears of joy. No matter how I find you, I will weep for you.

Act out your violent intentions and take the life of another. Letting another live and let live, why cannot this be a mantra? Profiting off of the misery of others to get rich because this is the picture that you have been painted by the profiteers who sell souls for a few gold coins. Perhaps environment is the cause, or perhaps there is something deeper? Could the need to control and dominate be inherent to our nature, and if this is the case, what can we really do to separate ourselves from what we must be?

A tired beggar clings to life in ragged clothes. Beaten down by life and suffering from lack of care. We look on in disgust at the sight of a person who has seen better days. We want to walk on, but something quietly tells us to stop. We hold an internal conflict, this person is hopeless, I don't really have the time. In this moment of decision, let us remember one who gave up all, so that we might live an eternal life. So when you next come upon some who you think has no hope, remember that Jesus said you were worth his time.

Is life worth living, can anyone say. Is it worth the pain and hardship that we must face. Is it worth the emptiness of seeking materialistic things. Is life worth living I ask the question again. Sometimes it seems pointless, to continue to fight. It seems that it would just be easier to step aside. To let life go and fall into sweet release, oh please can someone tell me is life worth living.

Though we have never met and we might not agree. I am on the line in harms way. I prepare for the task of war, but readily pray for peace. I am the tip of the spear but I want to lend a helping hand. When there are those who would impose their will on another, I will stand ready to answer the call. I am willing to lay down my life for the cause in which I believe. I will do this and much more. When there in injustice and hopelessness, I will be the sword and shield. I will show that the cost of violence is too high to pay. It is my hope that others will choose discourse over war, but if I must fight then I will. I will stand for freedom with my life's blood so that others do not have to.

I stumble from the bed and stub my toe on the door. I shed my night clothes and leave them laying about the floor. I turn on the shower and the water is deathly cold. I shiver as I try to wash a way the haze. I limp out a naked mess, trying to open my eyes, still dripping from my icy baptism. I find a semi-clean towel and dry off as best as I can. I look for my house slippers and stumble into the kitchen. I sit down and compose myself, because I hate rising before dawn. I look over at the coffee *** and pray that it is on. Much to my dismay, it hasn't started yet. I see through blurry eyes what the time truly is. I am in disgust with myself for not checking my alarm. The coffee *** says 4 am and that does me great harm. For you see I am now frustrated and barley alive, because my coffee *** is set for when I have to get up and that is just a quarter past 5.

If today is all that there was and no promise of tomorrow were made, how would you feel about the way you would live today? Would you give up and simply end it all or would you hope beyond this life to something better, in another place where all people can start anew?

We swim in oceans of oil, and natural gas is in abundance. Minerals are being pulled from the earth without thought. Food is made on a massive scale, so much so that we can use it for fuel. With all of these things in abundance, why isn't there enough? People flee war and are trapped starving and cold. Disease runs rampant yet wealth abounds. People feel sad but turn a blind eye. So one must ask the question with all that is evident, is there enough?

Nations produce grain in abundance and turn their food in to gas . People in African countries starve and dies in the dust for want and lack. Ideological zealots rise up and use violence to force you to believe their way. In their wake they leave destruction and death, just so you will see things their way. Some people pollute their cities to obtain more material things. while others live with clear skies, but die in the heat and the rain. Many question the madness of ideals, where some have too much and others not enough. Perhaps if those who have great amounts, would share more with those who have nothing, the we could answer the question is there enough.

Long ago in foreign lands, I stood quietly with a gun in my hands. In the midnight hour I walked the line. I watched the horizon for trouble from the sea. I was far away from my loved ones, as far as one could be. In places where I did not belong, I went to answer duties call. I was part of a greater good, one among many. I did not complain, for I had raised my hand. I was willing to pay freedoms debt, no matter what the cost. Where others now walk I once stood. I stood the watch and answered freedoms call.

I bow down and give up my burdens. I turn from the fight. I lay down before the cross of Calvary and seek to know your will. I sit in silence and wait on heavenly guidance. I accept the will of the one who made all things and seek to be taught his ways. In all things I surrender to the supernal power of the most divine. In humility I seek only to serve as a vessel for his will. I wait empty for his holy spirit to fill me. I shall be steadfast in the masters hands, until I  become what he wants me to be.

The battle has been long and hard fought. I have lived fearful that I would be seen as weak. I have struggled with my own pride and wrestled with an aching heart, but at last I have come to wonder why I even fought. Looking into eyes soft and welcoming, I realize that I could only fight in vain. Your passion is as over whelming as the fragrance of a field of Lilly's. Your depth of caring rivals the deepest ocean. In utter exhaustion from the emotional struggle, but at last in complete peace, I surrender to love and to a part of myself that I never knew that I was missing.

Battle though I have, the war is all but lost. I have guarded my heart for way too long. I have suffered many wounds but my defenses have held as long as they can bear it. Now you have found a way through the cracks in my armor At long last I am weary and long to rest in your arms. Take me gently and hold me close to you. I raise the white flag and succumb to your enticements, at last I surrender to love.

I can't believe I did it. They say not do it, but I did it anyway. I hope it will not hurt me, but how can you really tell. This morning my head is pounding and I have gut wrenching pain. I can barley walk to the bathroom. I will never do this again. The last time I did this, I said the same thing. Oh it hurts to breathe, I wonder if it is in my gut or my head. I can't imagine it can really hurt me, I mean it was supposed to be dead. How can something live in Tequila that is 100 proof. I hope it was dead and that is the honest truth. They told me you shouldn't do it, but I guess I will have to learn, that you should never drink so much Tequila that I swallowed the worm

When the sun is falling low and the earth is very still, I like to take a stroll and listen to the blessed silence. As flowers turn their petals to catch the last rays of daylight, I can see the true beauty of things as shadows gently fall. It is in this time of coming rest that spirits are gentle and the soul lets itself be seen. Along well worn paths I take a walk in the garden just to regain my peace.

Under the shade of Spanish moss and deep inside the bayou, something crawled out and shook off the dirt and grime. It sat upon a rock and looked at the sun. It was long green and scaly, but no one knew quite what it was. It just yawned and lay flat. For hours it sat idly then a local politician passed by, the thing jumped quickly and gobbled him up. With a full belly it slithered back into the murky bayou, never to be seen again.

Ding I heard the chime. I went to my computer and saw the first line. Subject, we are done. How cruel is that, no it is a lot of fun. The break up was fast and clean, cleaner than an elective surgery. It simply said I can't do this anymore, it is not you it is me. A sad face beside the message, so I hacked into her computer to see what was really going on. I found all of her messages and all she said about me. I found some rather nasty videos that she would never let me see, but she was talking to some guy from Fresno and he got them in her video chat. I decided why the hell not and so that was that. I put all of her business online for all the world to see. On face book, twitter and Instagram were just a few places you see. Then I moved on to YouTube and got a million views. What do you know she is a **** star and doesn't even know it yet. So anonymous post to anonymous upload, I cover my trail and to think that all her trouble began when it came to me in an email.

Open the cylinder and put a bullet in. Whirl it around and close it up again. Put it to the side of my head and give the trigger a pull. Catch my breathe and take a drink and do it once again. Take some more chances, I think I will just jump in.

Life is a wisp of smoke and a vapor that we must endure. Life passes too quickly and then we come to the end. As the leaf that falls from the tree, so we live and then pass. Our sorrows are only for a moment and our pain is only for a time, then it is gone. In anticipation of a better reward we live this life and look forward to the hope of tomorrow. That which is for both sorrow and joy passes as our mortal vessel dwindles and fades from the stage of life. We come and then we go, as the changing of the Summer to the Fall and then to Winter, this life and it's suffering it is only for a season.

I sit here shaking, I cannot believe what I am seeing. How did these photos of me end up everywhere. The emails are cruel and the chat post are awful. My stomach is turning just thinking about them. I thought he loved me and now I am a running joke. Someone posted a photo album on a **** shaming site. I did not say it was all right but I remember very little about what happened. I got drowsy and the rest is kind of a blur. I remember his hands going where I did not want them to go. I remember him kissing me and saying that we wanted this. What happened after that is kind of a hazy mess, but I do remember that over and over again, I told him NO!

My eyelids flutter as the fire rushes through my veins. The reaction is taking hold. The needle just hangs there as I take a trip, flying high into the sky. I can see the stars coming close and I can hear my heart thundering with each beat. All of the pain has slipped away and I am letting go. Slipping away from my prison, I look for the light. I see so many colors and hear sounds but cannot make them out. I am fading into the nothingness, my pain will soon be gone. I lose conciseness as everything goes black. For a moment I am free, it is over. Then without warning I feel a thousand stabbing daggers tearing through my chest. No it can't be, I was almost free. They have no right to bring me back to my pain, it was almost over!

First you love me then you don't! You want me to come back but then I won't come to you. You cry Crocodile tears and my heart opens up, then you push a dagger through it. Love is not supposed to be easy, but I don't think it is supposed to be like this. I am not sure what I am supposed to do with you. Are relationship is at best complicated.

Caring should not take a resolution. Giving of yourself should not be a guilty pledge, it should be the way we live. We should not wait one hour to help out our fellow human, we should do it now. It should not take a new year for each of us to see how we can help someone out.

Crime runs rampant in the streets and our schools are failing, but who is to blame. Corruption festers in the halls of power and we tune it out, but what can we do? The news is distorted and the truth is shaped to fit the narrative of who is telling it, but what is really happening. The whole is crumbling but they say we are rebuilding. Streets are filled with cracks and sidewalks have homeless people sleeping on them, who do we call to fix this. Perhaps if everyone looked in a mirror for longer than the time it takes to comb our hair and put on makeup, then we would see who is really to blame.

After three days of sorrow, the clouds rolled away. The new day had come and the air was quiet and still. Then the earth was shattered by  a violent quake as all of creation stood in witness. The door to hell was opened and death was cast away. It was a new morning for salvation when Christ rose from the grave.

I swear the light was Green not Tomato Red. I promise I wasn't speeding at least that's what my speedometer said. I don't know where that hydrant came from it wasn't there before. I don't know how that ding came to be in the car door. Thus are the endless excuses we give when we eventually get caught. Trying to shirk our responsibility, because I promise it wasn't my fault

I wanted to speak what was on my mind, I turned my prose inside out and inverted my verbs. I reversed my pronouns and skewed my adjectives in an attempt to express myself. I turned my a sentence backwards, then upside down until nothing made any sense. It was only when I looked at it all in a mirror, that I was able to express my thoughts.

I am filled with faults and I was born in sin. I make mistakes, but I still try again. I give to help others that they may come to know, that there is a better way. I live with my mortal failings each and everyday. It is not that I am perfect you see, but it is because of one who died for me. So I walk in imperfections until I see his face, because despite my imperfections, I am redeemed by his saving grace.

I walk in lace of purest white, I come to the day I have dreamed of all of my life. With Roses and babies breath adoring my hair. I have become a treasure most precious, an object of pure desire. In a breathless moment I take my place in a grand precession on this special day. As all eyes turn to me and through a lacy white veil, I look forward as I take my first steps into a moment of a dream. Though I am in quiet reverence of this moment, I am bursting with joy inside, for I walk in lace at last to become my soul mates loving bride.

I cannot eat one bite of food. My stomach is tied in knots and sleep has not been my friend. I wrestle with my emotions and the emptiness that I feel inside. I am tossed about like a ship on the ocean as I suffer through each day in misery. I long for rest and understanding, but no one seems to be able to relate to how I feel. So I will drift along the shore of emotional despair, looking for a safe harbor where I can find emotional stability and shelter from the storm of confusion that now consumes my life.

I want to leave the pain behind. I want to find a new place. I feel so closed in by life. I just want out.

Oh to dance on Green meadows and bask in the sun while my silver mane blows in the wind. My mighty horn proclaiming my dominion over all that I survey, in a kingdom full of fairies and elves. The trees full of sprites playing tricks on unsuspecting travelers while I run as fast as my hooves will carry me. In a place where the water is clear and taste like Strawberries one day and honey the next. Oh how I would love to be a Unicorn living in such a mystic land.

I want my life to flow like a wellspring , I want to put forth rejuvenating waters of hope. I want to be a fountain of knowledge. I want to be a stream of encouragement. I want to be a river of strength. I want to become an ocean of caring. I want to be a endless help to others. I want to water those around me and watch them grow.

Putting on eye shadow then taking it off again. Changing the shades of my lips or the color on my cheeks. Too much base or not enough, to hide my blemishes. Longer eyelashes or shorter ones I cannot decide. Do I match the picture in the magazine, is that really me. I don't even look like myself. I can't eat that or I will get fat. Should I wear heels or flats? Does polish go with my dress or do I need a French manicure. I can't decide, its driving me mad. I want to be liked, I want to fit in. I stress so I want to eat, but then I have to throw up and I am hungry again. Is all of this worth it, can't I be the real me. All I want to be is beautiful.

I want to live my life like the devil may care! I want to wear my clothes in a way that makes people stop and state. I want to get you excited just by casting an evil grin! Oh how I would love to be Harley Quinn!

I try to think through the haze of the things I have taken in. My mind seems to be a lot more clouded than usual. I can only see in tunnel vision. The things that are around me are a blur, I am not sure why that is. I try to focus on a simple thought, but I get distracted. I try to make sense of it all and retrace my steps to see where I started to lose my mind. I am not sure if this is self induced or something more sinister? I try to clear my head by long walks and not eating for a few days. I only end up lost and sick from not eating. I simply stumble back to my bed and try to quiet my mind. I think I need another fix to make the day go by. I am not sure what it will take for all of this drama to come to an end. I am not happy here anymore, I want to be me again.