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butterflies scream,
wilted flowers weep
my loneliness holds me
in my sleep

toss and turn
that faithful friend
is here to stay
until my end

clinging to shadows
my blood it infects
until the noose tightens
around my neck

the puncture marks
in my arm
of the needle
keeps me warm

induced chemicals
in the red stream it goes
that loneliness inside
high and low

the end I see
no tunnel of light
finally I know, and I
cling to life...
                       With
                                  all
                                        my
                             might
 Jan 2014 Jai Rho
tom krutilla
he walks, he wiggles, on the ground
slowly but surely, without a sound
his feet are a hundred, timely in beat
rhythm and rhyme, one, two, three

the caterpillar is unique in his own way
nothing bothers him, he likes that way
he comes and goes up and down his tree
slowly, but surely, one, two, three
Most of the other children aren't
As lucky as I am. They lay
In their own beds, in their own rooms.
But I have my best friend of all.
They get their own moms and dads,
While 30 of us are sleeping in one big
Hall, crowded together in bunk beds,
But I get to share my bed with Teddy Bear.
We hug each other at night, waiting to stand
In line tomorrow, to find new parents, but
Teddy Bear is my family. He watches dark closets
For me in the night, and fights the boogeyman in the
Dark. He comforts me, telling me one day I can have
My own parents, and in real life, he's scary, but to me.
He loves me, the only o e, and hnis my family.
 Jan 2014 Jai Rho
spysgrandson
I am    
color blind, my kind
number in the millions  
yet nobody has made a secret
language to sign to us, to ensure
we don’t miss the rich laughter
of the living
no filter, no prism
has been divined to bend light  
to our pleasing,
no lens to hug
the eye, to make the gray rose red,  
the black sea blue, or imbue a sunset
with more than mocking,
shocking streaks of white
before the hapless night
I do not  know what
I am missing, for blood,
when spilled, is but store bought paint,
and how would I get the blues
if hues are emissaries
of another world  
one where hearts bleed red  
with songs for the dead  
I am color blind, my kind
number in the millions  
who will never see
Still working my way back from writer's block
say something, I'm giving up on you

we argue about the slightest things
we always voice our opinions
but you say you would rather argue with me
than be with someone else

I'm learning to love

your eyes shine like I have never seen
and your touch is different than those before you
but I feel like my love will destroy you
inside and out

and I will swallow my pride

my corrupt soul is what is going to send you running
and my unexpected nights of crying
and wanting to end my streak of being clean
but you still hold on and refuse to let that scare you

and anywhere, I would follow you*

you seem to know best for everyone
but do you know what's best for me?
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