Conniving people with deceitful eyes altering my fate.
I’m lost and I don’t know who I am, how will I ever escape?
The serpents are machinating an orchestrated plan.
Why the **** do I care so much? And where is it that I stand?
So as I try to figure out this utterly hell bound plan,
I keep trying to move forward, as I try to deal with this hand.

What’s around the corner?
It’s in the shadows.
Is there a way out?
Things are decieving me.
It doesn’t matter if anyone grieves.
I just don’t want this to be the way I leave.

Taken apart piece by piece, why isn’t there room to grow?
I lost my mind, I lost my heart, and what about my soul?
So how do I get out of this mess I call my life?
I feel like a dead corpse, just stumbling around with seldom sights.
It seems that every feeling I ever get to feel, gets ****** right out of me.. **** I just want to feel real.
But with every fibre of my being, slowly being taken away.
There’s little hope to continue, so I guess I’ll just continue trying to be okay.

No meaning in this life.
Maybe there never was.
I guess I’ll just end up forgotten in the dust.
**** love and everything that goes along with it.
I’m surrounded by blinded bigots.
So here’s to the times that I thought life was worth it.
Well congratulations because you showed me that it’s nothing but dirt.
So all you people who never stop your corruption and lies, i guess you did it again by making me wish for a tolerable demise.
I want nothing more than for your bodies to burn.
Flesh blistering until it’s the next ones turn.
But it’s not that easy because I’m “not supposed to know anything”.
**** you all to hell because the only salvation I ever had was before you pried your way into my being.

I guess hiding in my dreams never works.
Because I have no control and that makes me somehow cursed.
So how does everything usually feel like the worst.
And nothing I ever try to do works.
I think people should try to look at things from different points of view.
Maybe then life would be less misconstrued.
But if you’re always biased there will never be another way.
What’s the problem in a better change?
Don’t you remember when everything felt brand new?
Maybe everyone should try to find their original shoes.
And maybe it’s easier said than done.
Because life happens and some people have to run.
I guess I know what they could be running from.
But that doesn’t mean to write it all off and throw people under the bus.
So as I try to bloom into the person I feel I am,
I hope no one else will fall to their last stand.
And **** people getting dealt hard or impossible hands, because peace and love is key for living a life you can stand.

I feel like a stranger in my body, no organs are working in harmony.
So displaced.
I hate this place.
I've become a disgrace.
Can i turn the page?
Or will i tear my skin open in hopes of shedding everything i hate?
I think it's too late for me.
At least i still have my sanity.
But i will never find a key.
And i know the problem is me.
But there are far too many renegades working against all of this.
I can't find a way to climb out of remiss.
I guess i'll stay awake with the moon to watch the sunrise because that's the only type of bliss i won't miss.

I guess this is it.
And all that's left is unresolved feelings and despair.
It's no wonder life turned out this way, and no wonder no one wanted to care.
So as i wish that there were more hope for the ones i love.
I'll hope that when the time comes they can watch over the earth in a better place from above.
But there's no time left for me anymore.
I guess the hoax is over and there's nothing left but the everliving pit of a door.

My life is so misconstrued.
It’s like I’m suffocating and I can’t find my shoes.
I don’t know what it’s going to take to continue.
Why is everything so catastrophic?
All of this seems so psychotic.
So as I try to be the light that I need, I’ll try not to grieve about my life falling apart at the seams.
And I can always hope to live the life of my dreams.

Things seem like they’re starting to look up.
But I don’t think I’ll feel another’s touch.
I don’t think I have it in me to love.
Or make it feel like the stardust from above.
So I guess I’ll just be standing in the rain.
Trying to get up before this mess drives me insane.
At least it seems people are done with the games.
So in the meantime I’ll pick myself up off the ground.
As I try to find a happier sound.
Maybe one day someone will keep me around.
But until that time comes I’ll keep trying to be found.

I still remember the day you left.
And how my heart started wrenching in my chest.
The days passed, and you were still the only one I wanted.
Maybe I was lost for a while, but I smile remembering how it started.
You were my music, in a dreary world.
A daydream come to life, you were that beautiful something that unfurled.
But now I’m left cold and alone.
Trying to melt my heart of stone.
But our memories I hold dear.
Hoping one day I might once again hold you near.

No one knows what to do, the masquerades lies keep everything “true”.
I’m at a loss of what to do.
But everything keeps getting more misconstrued.
Apparently boredom is why they “play”,
My life is nothing but their ****** up charade.

Maybe one day I’ll feel the ocean water on my toes, and I’ll end up feeling like I’m finding my way home.
Maybe I’ll finally start to touch the stars, But my soul is lost and I lost most of my heart.
But somehow I still have some hope, I know I don’t want to succumb to the rope.
So how do I find myself and be truly me?
It’s a smouldering mess and I’m in the middle of the crossfire it seems.
But I want to try to make this life count, and life the rest of my life with a little less doubt.
So as I wrap myself in my favourite sweater, I’ll keep trying to win my life back to withstand the weather.
And put myself back together, I just need to find the pieces and hope everything comes back together.

Every now and then my eyes and heart fill with hate.
I wish i could figure out how to escape.
It's something i would never have expected.
And my one sided life is not open ended.
I'm on my way to that deathbed.
The one i've been trying to escape.
But things are so contorted that i can't get off of this forsaken page.
There is little hope for a better day.
So why am i now finding that i'm more okay in a sociopathic state?
If there were another way i would take it.
But it seems people are so conniving that they just fake it.
Why am i surrounded by this masquerade of liars, fakes and thieves.
It's subliminal slavery.
And being able to see things clearly can't even help me overcome this petty tragedy.
I just wish i could get out of this labyrinth hoax of a life.
Try to break free, and rid myself of the strife.

As the days go by, i can't figure out why i can't feel alive.
Is it because no one ever stays by my side?
I guess i spend too much time trying to hide.
Will i ever reach the sky?
Or is my being so fragmented that i'll never be able to feel?
I guess the problem isn't trying to heal.
But rather trying to get my soul back and break through the barriers of my mind.
Will i ever feel the heart beating in my chest?
Or has this melancholy gone on for too long that i can't be my best?
I guess time will tell what's in store.
I just hope i can reach the stars before everyone else closes the door.

Disasters pushing me down a winding staircase.
I guess my life is always a test but it feels like a distorted race.
I can’t find the right place.
What’s left of my mind space?
I just want to leave in hopes of a new pace.
But I’m stuck on figuring where I could find a home.
Maybe this would be easier if I could find my soul.
I’m lost and I don’t know which direction to go.
My feelings have mostly left again, is it better than feeling woe?

This web of lies holds nothing of value.
When all of this started I had no clue that anything could ever get this misconstrued.
Now if I want to live I have to continue on the serpents path.
Dodging my untimely death, hoping this breath won’t be my last.
So as I hope this hoax doesn’t get more contorted, I should focus on leaving but they’ll never stop the distortion.
All my existence they’ve had me cornered.
Go to ******* hell just because you try to keep it civil doesn’t mean any of this has any order.

Life is too vain and it's full of deceit.
You people do too many despicable things and it leaves others trapped underneath.
This life is like a cesspool, and you're all filled with greed.
I'd erase you all, to try to be free.
I've lost my sanity, it's all just a hoax.
You people make life feel like a horrendously ridiculous joke.
So as I try not to choke, I'll keep in mind that there was never any hope.
I've suffered too many of you peoples petty blows, to feel sorrow.
It's just a contorted mess and I'm only left with anger and woe.

My feelings are fleeting, but that doesn’t stop me from wanting to drown in them.
Happiness is deceiving because everyone’s always leaving, so what’s left of the plot?
I’m like a rollercoaster but I’m mostly distraught.
The thieves made their way into my being so now I’m just a shell of who I was before.
Maybe that’s why everyone always closes the door.
Maybe if I could learn to love myself I’d end up having more.
But this life of mine is a hoax, I feel like nothing but a joke.
If only I had something other than false hope.
Maybe then I wouldn’t want to succumb to the rope.

I don’t know where I am but I feel like I’m living in hell.
I don’t know what to do because nothing ever really works out.
If only I didn’t have so many doubts in myself.
Maybe then I wouldn’t always dwell.
I can’t tell if I’m more than just a shell.
But the things I see makes my life feel like I’m cursed.
I wish I could find truth so things could work.
Instead I’m left dragging my body through the dirt.
Trying to run away from the fear and the hurt.
I just wish I had my feelings and pain, feeling like who I am keeps me from going insane.
Am I stuck here? Or is there a way out?
I don’t know what I’m doing but there’s so much doubt.

When you can’t take the sting of the blade, and the orchestrated mess gets worse and doesn’t change, how do you turn the page?
If I could breathe my last breath of air, without a care of what else is in this world, would there be hope to let the good in life unfurl?
I can’t see anything good, right or just.
Just want to end this mess of my life because with them it’s all a fuss.
When will it end?
I know I’ll never mend.
But until I breathe a breath of fresher air, I’ll just keep hiding because life isn’t just unfair.
It’s me against the mass and it’s all an untimely dare.

Faces once friendly are making me question my hope.
Where am I going? Maybe I should let go.
But what am I letting go, if it’s mostly my life?
I can’t give up on myself but so many people bring strife.
I feel like I’m hanging on by a fibre of thread.
What’s happening in this chaos? What’s left of the mess?
Seldom people to trust and I guess I have to hide.
Maybe not everyone is wearing a disguise.
But I’m stuck in this trap and I might be starting to drown.
I guess I’ll just have to try to turn this disaster around.

I guess I confuse hate for love.
There’s not much to say when push comes to shove.
I guess that’s why I grieved in that time.
And still fearing my untimely demise.
But I’m so ******* sick of all of the lies.
Won’t won’t they all just take off their disguise?

Sometimes my eyes flood, and i can't escape the tides.
Sometimes the storm lingers, and i'm stuck in their disguise.
Sometimes the sun shines down on me, and i forget the fear.
Sometimes i feel alone, because no one is ever near.
Will i ever find my way out of this sequence?
A part of me doesn't believe it.
I'm sinking deeper into the pit.
Did it ever matter where i chose to sit?
I still can't fathom how it came to this.
So as i try to get out of remiss, i'll hope that my someday comes.
And i'll finally feel effervescent in bliss.

Go ahead and play your sadistic petty ******* cause you all want my head.
Well it goes both ways cause life would be better if you people were dead.
If only I could drive a ******* stake through your heads.
But wait I’m just one person so I guess it doesn’t matter what’s said.
Driving a stake through your heads would never suffice, for all your petty torment always leading to you feeding my demise.
You’ve always had petty hate locked behind your eyes.
Do you really have to drive people insane to feel good at times?
Yeah I guess you have a hold on whatever’s left of this being.
But you all deserve to get slain then rot for an eternity because this is something no sane person could fathom seeing.

This is more than a petty mess.
I want to leave and be done with all the rest.
No one to trust, this life is so cold.
I’m blinded by hate but this is getting so ******* old.
I feel like I’m crippled on this lonely path.
Not focusing on what breath will be my last.
I guess I’ll just end up a thing of the past.
But my life is so meaningless no matter the track.

So many paths and all of them are planned.
What do I do about every short hand?
I guess I know a little about their master plan.
But with all of their hidden agendas where the **** do I stand?
No one understands what is is to be me.
Everyone says they know me but it’s just versions that I’ve been.
So how do I find myself and regain what I lack?
I lost every part of who I was and I just want to get it back.
What was the point of planning out someone else’s life?
They should have just let me succumb to the knife.
Never truly happy cause I always lose it all.
They knew it was only a matter of time till I fall.
But I keep falling and getting trapped in this sequence.
Who the **** even lives like this?
I’m finding that there are more enemies that I never even met.
Why the **** are so many people out to get me i’m filled with regret.
Their plans were just to use me for their own sick gain.
Why use someone for power? I’m going insane.
I’m so sick of the torment and all of the lies.
I feel like so many people are wearing a disguise.
I can’t tell who I am anymore.
I have nothing to say because I’m consumed in this petty *******, I’m more or less a bore.
So how do I get away and live the rest of my life?
Something tells me I won’t get very far because I’m always left thinking about the knife.

My misconstrued fate left me with nothing.
Believe me when I say that when it came to the truth I was never bluffing.
They used to have so much power over me, and they’re always ******* me over.
Maybe that’s why I never had a chance.
And in the past anything that came to mind was spoken.
I’d rather be me and the way I was when I was broken.
I’m still damaged beyond repair but in a different sense.
Things are so distorted now, trust me it’s immense.
So many people weaseled their way in.
And now I’m left with my own sins.
Maybe it’s not much but I regret it all completely.
Is it fear I’m holding? Or did they really make me worse than them because I’m still breathing?
I can’t accept myself or any of this mindless nonsense.
Why do the get a thrill out of the torment?
I don’t get how people end up like this unless it’s provoked.
I just hope things start to get better because I don’t know what’s left of my hope.

Maybe these feelings are more like despair.
But I guess it’s true that no one truly cares.
I want to feel the blade on my skin.
Let it run red and let the sadness win.
What do I have left in this hell ride I call life?
All I ever feel is mostly only strife.
So I guess I’ll spend my time alone with the moon.
It’s only a matter of time until the doom consumes.
I feel haunted or like a burden in every single room.
The noose would be better than this life of tormented doom.

There is no good anywhere I look.
Just people hiding behind whatever false reality I believe in.
Well life is lacking and no one cares about any consequences of any of their actions.
So how do I get away?
Why am I stuck in the this charade?
Why is life just fuckery and their lies and constant games?
I want to go to the edge of the earth to see if there’s any hope out there.
But I doubt there’s any hope for a breath of fresher air.
I don’t get the corruption.
Or why the lives they lead make them love it.
It’s like a cycle of lying and conniving greed.
Fueled by their sick minds to get more “evil” and they don’t care to see.
Yet the problem is still me.
So ******* all and your petty games, I just want to be able to breathe.

The days go by and I can't rid you people from my life.
My wrists so desperately need the sting of the knife.
Before you people think about engulfing someone's being, why don't you think about the life they may be leading.
The only person for whom I'll ever be grieving is my precious daughter ava who you people won't keep breathing.
It's one burden after another.
It leaves me so ******* smothered.
You people never give it a rest.
So I guess this was the final test.
It should be off with all of your heads.
But this time just let me carry out my death.

Maybe I shouldn’t have tried so hard but I honestly used to care.
Maybe the masquerade took it too far, it was a senseless petty dare.
Maybe I should have offed myself when I was begging to die in my sleep.
But maybe I should have never cared cause everyone was always against me.
Maybe it didn’t matter because I’m always trapped with this fake family.
And maybe I didn’t know that most people run off of greed.
So in these passing moments that I guess I’ll start to rot.
I’ll regret every minute I tried to help because no one ever leaves me anything but a shell filled with negative energy, so distraught.

So I guess every part of me is covered up.
Why is this still going on? Isn’t it clear I’ve had too much?
Oh right you don’t want “all of the work to be for nothing”.
But trust me I was never bluffing.
Everyone so blindly follows their lies.
Manipulating everything, always kept in some sort of disguise.
And I’m trapped in this mess cause whoever I am is lost.
**** the misconstrued distortion, I see that it’s flawed.
How does the masquerade have an army?
I’m trapped with no way out.
And everyone is devolving.
If you were truly yourselves you wouldn’t succumb to tormenting others.
**** it I guess I can’t find a true friend, nevermind a lover.

It’s clear that all hold for the mass is hate.
Stop dictating my life and let me escape.
I hope to hell that you reach the final stake.
Because i can’t get off this god forsaken page.
So as I try not to let my being fill up with rage, ill hope you people stop treating life as your petty ******* stage.

Living as a puppet.
Why do they love it?
Why can’t I make them burn?
This is nothing but absurd.
I’d chain you to a board and burn your skin, rip apart your flesh till you’re bleeding from within.
Petty ******* sins, fueled by lies.
Corruption led in your stolen disguise.
You people are demented and at the very best ill.
I will never be happy until your body is in pieces and I make sure you’re all killed.

How petty can life get until everyone’s a ******* disgrace?
All you people care about is power while lying with **** eating grins on your face.
Yes I know I’m at fault, but ruining the quality of life isn’t the same as taking it with a grain of salt.
I’m so bitter that I regret ever trying to right my wrongs.
So **** it all no one will ever belong unless they succumb to the masses of only doing wrong.

Wandering in the dark.
I need to regain my lost heart.
Will i always be alone?
Or will i find a key that feels like home?
Whatever my fate, i know i need to escape.
Find me wandering under the stars.
Let's get lost travelling with the sunrise.
As i try not to think about my demise.

I guess I’m destined to be hated.
I’ve never been so jaded.
Will I be able to escape this?
Or will things keep leading back into remiss?
The thorns in my head are tearing me apart.
Don’t get me started with the lack of feeling in my heart.
So as I try to get out of this vicious cycle, I’ll try to stop living in denial.

Life seems ominous.
Too many problems.
Why are you people so counter productive?
I don't understand how everyone loves it.
So what's the point of making this life?
It only leads the weak or problem ridden to the knife.

Life is horrendously despicable because of all these petty bigoted games.
Why drive decent people insane, because you’re stuck in your petty sadistic belligerent ways?
I tried to get of the page, but everyone’s pretty much the ******* same.
******* all to hell.
I’m tired of all of these ******* rules and the way you plan my days.

Eyes like the ocean, I’ll always have devotion.
A smile that will always light up the room, how could I ever lose the strength to continue?
A laugh that would melt your heart, I never want to depart.
A soul that angels would envy, I guess this is how life is supposed to be.

These days all I can think about is my lack of time.
I try not to think about it but the thoughts keep coming back about my demise.
Why is everyone so petty and misconstrued?
I’m so lost and I have no idea what to do.
Can’t even tell true faces from foes.
I’m so far gone that I’m even starting to miss feeling woe.
How do I get out of this pit?
It’s getting deeper and I have no idea where to sit.
So where can I go to change the plot?
I try to be okay but I’m always distraught.
It seems my life keeps getting tied into knots.
I don’t know how to untie them cause I keep getting thrown under the bus.
I wish I had more people to trust.
It seems all I can ever do is cause a fuss.
But these problems never seem to go away, friends come and go but no one ever stays.
I guess I’m more or less okay, I just wish there were a better way.

Where do you go when you can’t take the blade?
I don’t understand why this life holds so much pain.
Would I be better off wandering in the rain?
I have no idea where to turn because I’m going insane not being able to turn the page.
So as I block out the bad, and hope they let me it of their grasp, I’ll hope that one day this is something I can get past.
But there’s nothing for me here and nothing is clear.
I just think things would be better if someone was near.

Where do I go where my shadow won’t follow me?
I can’t find myself and I’m scared of what’s next it seems.
I just wish I could find a better direction.
In hopes it could help with my scattered reflection.
But what’s going on in the world around me?
I notice things and hope I’m not the only one who sees.
So why do things have to get so out of hand?
I just wish I could make people see that there are other ways to stand.

When parasites never stop spreading their disease, you find out nothing will change if you leave.
Life is hard to conceive, because these bigoted narcissists run off of their power tripping greed.

Maybe I’m broken but I’m destined to be alone. A once soft heart forced to be stone.  I wish I could leave this place but I have nowhere left to go. But I would take the pain and the sorrow over something with false hope.

Drowning in stress,
Will I succumb to death?
Why won’t they give it a rest?
Because no one deserves any of this.
How do I overcome my impending fall?
I feel like smashing my head against the wall.
But that wouldn’t solve anything at all.
I wish I could get away but I have no one to call.

Why live your life to be powerful?
******* over anyone you see fit.
And you try to keep people in fear for your own benefit.
What is the point of these games? There is nothing if nothing ever has meaning.
So keep feeding this mess that you drag people into.
One day you’ll all fall through the cracks of your misleading plot.
It’s a chaotic web and the more people you string along, the more will go wrong when you’re all the same.
Why the **** don’t you people see any other way?
This is all a petty hoax and there’s no point in trying to play.
So go ahead and put peoples lives in the palms of your hands.
But if the people in power are doing this you’re no better than what the government plans.

Why did I ever try?
It’s just all of these fakes in every disguise.
There’s nowhere I can go and I’m not trying to hide, this all just makes me want to tear out their insides.
But it’s no use when it’s you against the world.
What the **** is next? What fuckery could possibly unfurl?
These people are senseless and I’m the one on meds.
******* all I’d literally slit your throats and mutilate you from your feet to your chest.

The lies never end, you people deserve to descend.
I know I’ll never mend because my life is just pretend.
So how long will you keep up this hoax?
I think it’s time to take some notes.
You should never bring someone into this misery.
And no one cares if they can truly see.
So go ahead and wish to not turn out like me, I’ve already lost my sanity.
And you’ve all lost it with your alliance and greed.

So much hate, will I ever escape?
Why can’t I move past this and be happy for a change?
Have I ever been happy?
I forget what it’s like.
I don’t even feel like sleeping at night.
Trying to get the feeling back with whatever I can stomach.
But I’m a mistake in this existence, and somehow the masquerade loves it.
So what do I do to break off these chains?
I don’t know where I’m going but I know I need to change.