I guess it’s better to hate and be hated, than try to make amends because no one would let me change this.
Why the **** would I crawl back to the ones who did this to me?
It’s all such a twisted cycle ran by fear and greed.
So I guess all the seeds of hate that you planted worked.
I hope everyone rots and I want it to hurt.
I used to think all of this was something never deserved.
But the majority of my existence seems like some people deserve the worst.
And I’m not golden either because I turned out this way.
But believe me when I say I will never again pray for another way.
This was the pettiest torment I’ve ever experienced.
I’d rather burn in hell or get tortured in notre dame.
I guess I was right because everyone’s the same.
******* people over until they have it their way.
Just rot in ******* hell or get tortured all the same.

Why the hell do they form all these alliances?
The loop probably created all of these disguises.
But they were the ones who gave life no meaning.
So now hate evil and greed are roaming freely.
I guess I know who started this mess.
But who was it before them? Will they ever give it a rest?
I guess this is why there are terrorist bombings.
But look they’re intertwined with isis. Don’t worry I saw it coming.
People say they’re lending a helping hand.
But what if they stop caring, it was probably part of their plan.
I hope my time comes before the world goes to ****.
Because I never wanted to be a part of any of the *******.

They’re all so thrilled.
I hope they find nothing but hate for them still.
This town is like a cult.
And somehow everything is my fault.
If I could I’d rearrange their organs.
But I’m helpless so all of this gets worse or stays the same so it’s somehow dormant.
I hope they get the karma for doing wrong unto those who didn’t see it coming.
But somehow they’re all so happy and loving.
This makes me ******* sick.
If I could I’d give them a bunch of hits.
But this life is in remiss.
I got ****** into the middle of this.
I want to gauge out their eyes.
Tear out their organs and see what’s under their disguise.
But it’s not in me to win.
So **** them all, life is just a series of their sins.

So give me a ticking time bomb.
Where will it go?
Buried underneath this cesspool of a town?
Who even knows.
I’m the worst of the worst for living in the midst of all of this.
A once good hearted person led into remiss.
And maybe that’s why I wish them so much worse.
I’m a sociopath who gets homicidal, so I guess that’s why it doesn’t really hurt.
So tell me, why the **** did I ever even care?
They were always this bad, I always needed a breath of fresher air.
Who torments children into a waking nightmare.
Saying “that’s just how life works” will never be fair.
So I guess that’s why I’m always shut out of peoples lives.
Have I ever met anyone who wasn’t wearing a disguise?
My instincts tell me this life is filled with only their lies.
Get me out of their sequence because all I wish for is for them to all die.
But **** it I guess cause they’ve all been waiting for my demise.
I don’t give a single **** because my heart is shrinking in size.
So as I wait to never return, I’ll spend my last passing moments hoping that they all burn.

Corrupted minds.
Clouded judgement.
What happened to the true things and feelings?
It’s like smog, polluting everything it comes into contact with.
What happened to purity?
Everything is meaningless.
Counterproductive.
My tainted being is no better.
But my mind wants to find a way out.
But I can’t fathom it.
At the point of being crippled or tied down and locked in a cage.
What’s the point of this labrynth of a maze?
There’s no point to these mindless games, or all of life’s charades.
What are they covering up?
Does it matter?
I’m always the odd one out.
So why the **** am I still here?
It’s clear that no one wants me here.
So as I hope they suffer for the torture they put me through, I’ll hope the ones who never got involved live the lives they deserve.
Because everything they do feels like a curse.

Seeds of hate planted along my life.
I guess I should have saw it coming, why don’t I just succumb to the knife?
The only way out of this catastrophic mess, is to end my life because I barely have any feeling in my chest.
Everything got ripped away, but somehow in a sociopathic state I’m kind of okay.
How did things turn into such a distorted shade?
i can’t even comprehend how contorted I see things.
Everything’s ****** and there’s no peace it brings.
Does anyone even deserve peace? I honestly can’t see it.
Why **** someone over beyond repair and make it so no one could believe it?
I don’t understand why anyone does any of this *******.
**** it I guess I’ll never have any place to sit.

Maybe it was all just beautiful lie.
I thought you were the only one not wearing a disguise.
Now I guess it’s time for me to continue to hide.
Because I have no hope for a love to help me touch the sky.
Maybe one day I’ll be able to rearrange my fate.
And have a happy couple of days.
But until I find a way to escape, I’ll always remember the love you gave.
And how you meant so much more than I ever thought anyone could.
But now I’m left alone and aching.
I guess it’s my world that’s shaking.
Or maybe just changing.
Whatever happens next I hope I can save me.

Everyone thinks there’s an easy way out.
But the masquerade never stops and I’m left with too much doubt.
I want to try to get up and out.
But I’m damaged and caged, and I’m slowly going insane.
Why won’t they just stop the games?
I’m starting to fill up with too much hate.
And left wondering if I’ll ever escape.
But this labrynth of a maze is filling up my days, with too much to undo because the truth is misconstrued.
So I guess it looks like I’m ******, because none of them will ever have enough.
And everything’s so distorted that the truth is so contorted that my life is just so horrid.
And I have nothing more than a predetermined mess of a life.

There is no more good locked inside this vessel.
Just a hateful corpse dragging whatever’s left through life.
I guess it was only a matter of time until I no longer cared.
None of this makes sense, when will I reach my last breath of air?
I want to rip my veins right out of my arms.
I feel nothing and that kind of agony would do less harm.
People play god and don’t care about the consequences.
But what if there’s no way out? It’s their lives they should have ended.
Isn’t that what mass murders are usually about?
**** it I guess I’m past just a mess there’s no reason for anymore doubt.

Can’t escape dying in vain.
I can’t stay the same and it’s driving me insane.
Why is life a ****** up game.
Tormenting who they “don’t like” for their own sick gain.
Nothing is ever supposed to stay the same.
Life is supposed to be a spiral not some twisted charade.
There’s no point to the ******* because they make everything seem true.
What’s the point of distorting reality.
It’s so contorted because people’s hearts or heads are filled with greed.
What happened to respect peace and harmony?
It’s like everyone forms their own alliances and it’s like some ****** up army.
So I guess that could mean it could turn into a more despicably vicious cycle.
I guess I’m not the one whose living in denial.
But I have no will to help what I can fathom.
So **** it I guess I’ll just succumb to the shadows.

Why did I ever care?
No one was ever really there.
My whole existence is planned out.
That’s why no one truly cares.
And all everyone hoped was for me to stay oblivious and never find out.
I guess I’ll always be filled with doubt.
I just wish there was literally any way out.
So I guess that’s why they burdened me with all of these disorders.
It’s clear that this life has no order.
I find it sickening that life is really this ******.
I don’t care whose side they’re on cause I’ve had enough.
It’s so misconstrued when I call their bluffs.
The truth is distorted, will they ever get enough?
Why is everything about evil and greed?
Blinded by hate because no one ever sees.
Why doesn’t anyone care about all of humanity.
They say life isn’t fair but when you’re suffering you can find it hard to see.
Being unbiased has faded away, and for me there’s no hope for a brighter shade.
So **** the masquerade because they feed on the weak.
all they care about is power, evil and greed.
Maybe they don’t see, but I think they’re all corrupt.
**** it all because life has turned into a cesspool of people fiending over corrupted lust.

I feel like a slave.
There’s no peace in whatever this nonsense they play.
If only there were another way.
But I’m a lifetime too late.

Hated.
So jaded.
Can’t evade it.
I wish I could escape.
But my life is a labyrinth of a maze.
It was only a matter of time till I wasn’t okay.
What’s with these games?
Deception.
No direction.
Forced suppression.
Misconstrued perceptions.
I’m lost and I don’t think I’ll ever be found.
I know I’ll never get used to the sound.
Tear off my limbs and pin me to the ground.
I’m trapped in a cage and I can’t get used to the sound.

No life, no love.
Just alone. No real home.
What’s in the cards for me?
I guess for a while I was able to see.
But I’m losing hope to finding a key.
What’s locked inside my heart?
I can barely feel anything, at least I’m not falling apart.
How do I put the shards of my former self back to the version of the me I used to know.
I’m like a stranger in this body, and my life is a hoax.
No soul, no sorrow, just pity, no woe.
How did things get so contorted and distorted?
I need to get out of here because everything’s unclear.
Life might be worth it if I had someone near.

My feelings are fleeting, but that doesn’t stop me from wanting to drown in them.
Happiness is deceiving because everyone’s always leaving, so what’s left of the plot?
I’m like a rollercoaster but I’m mostly distraught.
The thieves made their way into my being so now I’m just a shell of who I was before.
Maybe that’s why everyone always closes the door.
Maybe if I could learn to love myself I’d end up having more.
But this life of mine is a hoax, I feel like nothing but a joke.
If only I had something other than false hope.
Maybe then I wouldn’t want to succumb to the rope.

At the bottom is where they’re keeping me.
I guess it’s my fate to never find a key.
I don’t care too much about my sanity.
I’m in a sociopathic state, I just wish I could do away with their hate.
But it seems like I’ll never find a way to escape.
So I guess that means I’ll never get off this page.
I wish I could regain what got stolen out of the lifeless shell that I’m trapped inside.
But there’s little hope to overcome the tides.
I’m sick of all of their lies.
So I guess if I don’t break free I’ll have to find a new place to hide.

They say life is unfair. It’s like I have some deathwish love affair. Why can’t I breathe some fresher air? I don’t know why but I’m becoming more and less scared. But I have nowhere left to go, I can’t even be myself. So let me drown in this bottle of doubt.

Destined to walk alone down this staggering and winding road. I guess this life has taken its toll. And my bones can’t withstand the cold. There’s nowhere left to go, I hope things get easier as I find a new place to call home.

I guess it's clear that i have no easy fate.
It's something i'm not sure if i can escape.
At least it seems that there's a change of pace.
But things are so misconstrued i don't think i'll ever get off this page.
There's deception around almost every corner.
And it seems this life of mine will never have much order.
So i guess i'll just have to get used to being alone.
Because it's not part of their plans for me to have a hand to hold.
But **** it's getting so lonely and cold.
And it's getting so hard to decipher this mess, it's like i'm wearing a blindfold.
So as i try to get out of this awful sequence, i'll try not to think about my fate because i know when that day comes i won't be missed.
I just wish it was in the cards to get out of this.

I guess I’m destined to be hated.
I’ve never been so jaded.
Will I be able to escape this?
Or will things keep leading back into remiss?
The thorns in my head are tearing me apart.
Don’t get me started with the lack of feeling in my heart.
So as I try to get out of this vicious cycle, I’ll try to stop living in denial.

Lace your fingers between mine and maybe we won’t have to hide.
When we kiss will we get frozen in time?
I just need to find someone who will stay by my side.
And we can walk among the sunrise to feel more alive.
Can we get lost in a brighter hue?
I just want to feel something true.
Because I’m sick of feeling blue and not knowing what to do.
So until he finds my side, I’ll try not to hide and wait for his warm embrace to maybe change my fate.

Find me by the ocean.
Let’s love away the pain.
No need for all these games.
Being so alone is driving me insane.
Will we get lost gazing at the stars?
Or do I not have enough heart?
I ache to love the way I wish to be loved.
And feel the stardust from above.
So will I find my someday?
Or will I succumb to the pain?
I guess time will tell, until then I’ll be stuck in the rain.

Thrown aside like a wilted flower.
I guess it’s safe to say I’ve had enough.
But there’s no one near so I’ll never feel their touch.
Why can’t I be worth more?
Maybe then everyone wouldn’t shut the door.
But I’m running out of time.
So I guess I should just try to let the sun shine.

Maybe one day my fate will change.
But until then I’m stuck waiting for my someday.
Why can’t I regain the love that was once buried beneath these ribs?
It’s not me whose condoning all these sins.
So as I wait for the flowers to bloom I’ll try to be me.
As I hope others stop feeding off of this negativity and find the courage to breathe easily.

What happened to the love locked inside my chest?
I’m aching for another’s touch but I can’t fathom what will happen next.
I feel so trapped and there’s nothing for me here.
I miss the feelings I once had but there are no more tears.
So as I try to pick myself up and brush off the debris from my misconstrued fate.
I’ll try harder to gain what I lack, as I try to escape.

Why do I always get cast out on my own?Everything of value got ****** away, maybe that’s why I can’t find my way home. I just wish I didn’t have to spend so much time alone. But now all I’m left with is an empty heart made of stone.

Sit with me and let’s look at the stars.
I only hope to get back my lost heart.
Let’s watch the sunrise after being alone with the moon.
Now is not the time to let the doom consume.
Take my hand and we’ll wander into the unknown.
Maybe someday I won’t be so alone.

Will I ever find my someday?
Will we feel one another’s warm embrace and gaze at the stars?
Or am I so lost that that kind of fate is too far?
Whatever my fate is I just hope that it comes soon, because I don’t know how much longer I can continue.

When you’re evil and conniving corruption is key.
Maybe that’s why they try not to ever let me see.
I’m not in it for myself it’s all of humanity.
I got blinded by hate because they set up my fate.
Now I’m trapped and I don’t even know if I want to escape.
My whole life is a charade, because people treat life like a game.
Maybe it doesn’t seem bad but it drives the good insane.
Why do they feed on those with good intentions?
There’s so much to say that I don’t know how to mention.
They say beauty is in the eye of the beholder but I see nothing good.
Is this the type of life they live?
They just **** away all of the good.
So why can’t they find it in them to just work on themselves?
Instead of ******* people over and putting their souls on the shelves?
So why can’t people just see things from a different point of view?
Is it really only me who thinks life is this misconstrued?
I don’t know what’s next but their plans are filled with hate.
Maybe that’s why I can’t get off of this god forsaken page.
Everyone seems to be liars, thieves and run off of greed.
They say they’re evil, but all I see is hate filled planted seeds.
So what’s the point in living like this?
******* people over to get themselves out of remiss.
And I’m not innocent either because they turned me into someone worse than them.
But the difference here is now I won’t accept a good hand.
They distorted reality in a contorted sense, all to get what they want and steal what they need right out of people’s heads and chests.
So why the **** won’t they just give it a rest?
Theres no need to put people through constant tests.
I tried to make people see but I couldn’t fathom what to do next.
Things don’t have to be perfect, but it is life itself.
Maybe that’s why I’m usually cautious and now I’m starting to dwell.
So what’s the next plan? I don’t know what to do next.
It’s not all up to me but I’m sick of people’s *******.
So as I hope no one else has to suffer like me.
I’ll just hope that those who need can learn how to see.

So trapped it doesn’t matter what I do.
Everything is so misconstrued.
Who am I? I keep losing my shoes.
Death is coming, and probably soon.
I wish I had the strength to make it through.
But everyone’s against me so there’s no hope to find a brighter hue.
So tell me, what is there left to do?
I’m so lost **** I have absolutely no clue.
So as I try to overcome this and maybe escape this impending doom,
I’ll keep searching for myself but even that’s been stolen too.
I guess the only thing left to do is to feel as much as I can in hopes of figuring out what to do.

Tear my chest open, there’s nothing inside.
My life has turned into a string of their lies.
No love to be found, just an empty shell.
I can’t even feel how alone I am and this feels like the worst kind of hell.
Everything gets manipulated or stolen.
And I’m trapped in this house with a family of people who will always be against me.
I just need to get away, I’m sick of this scenery.
So as I try not to focus on the fact that everyone always leaves.
I’ll try to find the pieces of who I once was because whoever I am now is their lifeless projection of me.
So as I try to be someone I can stand seeing and feeling.
Maybe I can find myself in the things they’re concealing.
But I have no will left so maybe I should find my feelings and focus on healing.

Being used never made me feel so tortured.
If only my life had some order.
But I’m locked in this nightmare of a life, and my dreams are no different.
At least in my dreams I can wake up and tell myself that it wasn’t real.
But everything in this life got stolen.
If only I had it in me to be golden.
But I’m a mistake.
This life is a never ending charade.
And I’m always too weak to play.
But I don’t want to treat life like a game.
And somehow it just gets worse by the day.
The voices never really leave.
It’s taking its toll and I don’t want to stay.
But it’s clear to me that every interaction towards me is filled with hate.
So as I try to live a life that doesn’t feel like a layer of hell, I’ll try not to dwell too much and be more than just a shell.

Plagued by the images in my head.
**** them all I’d rather be dead.
Their conniving game turned me into someone with little acceptance.
Now I’m left waiting for my death bed.
I’m losing respect for almost everyone I’ve encountered.
Slowly turning into a monster.
Why did they take it this far?
Just let me tear open my scars.
Because there’s no way in hell they’ll stop tearing me apart.

Left for dead.
What’s there left to do?
So misconstrued I’ve lost my shoes.
My heart is a barren wasteland.
Just let me sink my toes in the wet sand.
Forget about their plans, and this awfully crafted hand.
There’s no where left to go.
Lost my heart and soul.
I miss feeling woe.
But I’m stuck in this broken home.
There’s nothing for me here.
And everyone’s hate for me has become so clear.
So **** it all there’s no need anymore for tears.

Cold and alone.
I can’t withstand these brittle bones.
I have no place to go.
No friendly faces, just foes.
Why do people pretend to care?
I’m gasping for air.
Drowning in this mess.
Lost more feeling in my chest.
Is it gone for good?
I feel far less than anyone should.
I just want to escape.
As I hope for a better day.

How do you start to rebuild after sinking deeper and deeper into the hellhole of your life?
Why am i always filled to the brim with these negative emotions.
I miss feeling as deep as the ocean.
But now i'm cold and alone with no way home.
My brittle bones can't withstand the weather.
I just wish i could figure this out and try to make all of this better.
But my being is worn and tethered.
And i'm left with these typed out letters.
So as i try to regain as much of my lost heart that i can fathom,
I'll try to stop living in the shadows.
And hope to breathe some life into my lost soul, i just really wish i had somewhere to go or someone to hold.

Maybe sometimes life fills you with hope.
But i always feel like i'm going to choke.
It's like i'm walking on a tightrope.
And no place really feels like home unless i'm alone.
So how do i find some meaning to last?
I'm not ready to make this breath my last.
Maybe one day the stars will align and i won't feel like i'm running out of time.
But thoughts of my demise come creeping back in, and i feel like there's no way in hell i can ever win.
So what is it like to breathe easy and have something worthwhile?
I've been lost for so long that i can't tell if i'm in denial.
So as i try to find something that makes me feel alive.
I'll try to feel something so maybe one day i'll have it in me to thrive.

With my being so fragmented how will i ever get any part of me back.
I guess i'm starting to feel for now but i want to let the sadness win.
I don't care anymore about being around anyone because i hold no one dear.
Isolated forever, why is this life of mine so unclear.
I guess in the past i didn't understand.
And all of this petty slavery has kept me with a shorthand.
It was nice for a while when i was heard to feel like someone actually cared.
But i've more or less been alone so it felt like a breath of fresher air.
Little did i know they were mostly against me.
My feelings were robbed and i would have rather taken the agony.
Being a sociopath turned me into someone worse than them.
So why the **** am i sitting here writing again?
I don't know where i'm going but i never want to return.
Because all of this torture turned me into the absolute worst.
I guess it's something everyone knew i could never withstand.
So why can't i find any of the beauty in life because i can't take their plans.
I guess i should just wander until my last breath.
Because people are so despicable and never give it a rest.

Why give anyone the satisfaction?
It's like my whole existence is rationed.
What was really mine to begin with?
I honestly don't care anymore because i'll never be missed.
What was the point in figuring out a new way to coexist?
Why the **** did i ever care i'm always left for dead and my whole existence is in remiss.
So **** it i guess i just want to shoot myself dead.
Because a lifetime of suffering isn't worth all of these thorns in my head.

I guess i should just embrace the hate emanating from me and towards me.
I guess the problem wasn't that i couldn't see.
It was probably the fact that everyone liked me losing my sanity.
When will my time be up?
I've had it with this ******* and i'm sure everyone else has also had enough.
I'm so ******* sick of calling everyone's bluffs.
Because it's so clear to me that nothing to anyone will ever be enough.

Every now and then my eyes and heart fill with hate.
I wish i could figure out how to escape.
It's something i would never have expected.
And my one sided life is not open ended.
I'm on my way to that deathbed.
The one i've been trying to escape.
But things are so contorted that i can't get off of this forsaken page.
There is little hope for a better day.
So why am i now finding that i'm more okay in a sociopathic state?
If there were another way i would take it.
But it seems people are so conniving that they just fake it.
Why am i surrounded by this masquerade of liars, fakes and thieves.
It's subliminal slavery.
And being able to see things clearly can't even help me overcome this petty tragedy.
I just wish i could get out of this labyrinth hoax of a life.
Try to break free, and rid myself of the strife.

As the days go by, i can't figure out why i can't feel alive.
Is it because no one ever stays by my side?
I guess i spend too much time trying to hide.
Will i ever reach the sky?
Or is my being so fragmented that i'll never be able to feel?
I guess the problem isn't trying to heal.
But rather trying to get my soul back and break through the barriers of my mind.
Will i ever feel the heart beating in my chest?
Or has this melancholy gone on for too long that i can't be my best?
I guess time will tell what's in store.
I just hope i can reach the stars before everyone else closes the door.

How many days will go by, before i lose myself completely?
Everything's out of rhythm, i can't even feel my heart beating.
I just wish i could find a path to get myself back.
But it feels impossible to regain what i lack.
My being feels like it's constantly under attack.
And i can no longer stomach what i keep in my flask.
So is there any hope to find any sort of meaning that lasts?
Something tells me i'm nearing my death bed.
And these problems are taking it's toll on whatever part of me that i have left.
Am i really even me?
It's so distorted that i can barely see.
I'm slowly losing my sanity, and now i can see that the problem was never only me.

I guess it's true that you can take things for granted because you didn't know what you had.
I'm so consumed with all the bad, and i couldn't enjoy any of the good i had.
If you change and don't realize, are you losing or are you growing?
It used to always be my feelings showing.
But now i feel mostly nothing, so numb to the touch.
To the chaos.
I'm becoming bitter.
And i can't figure out any of this.
Why does it always lead to remiss?
Things are so scattered and it's always my life that's shattered.
Can i grow into a person i can accept?
All of this is just such a mess.
I just need my lost feelings that were once in my chest.
And try to enjoy the constellations and whatever could happen next.

I feel like a stranger in my body, no organs are working in harmony.
So displaced.
I hate this place.
I've become a disgrace.
Can i turn the page?
Or will i tear my skin open in hopes of shedding everything i hate?
I think it's too late for me.
At least i still have my sanity.
But i will never find a key.
And i know the problem is me.
But there are far too many renegades working against all of this.
I can't find a way to climb out of remiss.
I guess i'll stay awake with the moon to watch the sunrise because that's the only type of bliss i won't miss.

I can't take this life anymore.
There's no way to settle the score.
I wasn't asking for much, and they **** me over so much more.
Now i'm nothing but a worthless bore.
I'm in a sociopathic state, i can't even fathom hate.
There doesn't seem like a way i could escape.
I feel like i'm tied down and locked in a cage.
I don't have any hope for a better day.
**** them all, i'm going insane.
Why can't i just move past the torment?
I guess it's cause they won't let anything lie dormant.
I want to tear my organs right out of my being.
Be done with this ******* but i'm having trouble seeing.
Why did i have to sink so low?
I'm worse than them and in this life there's nowhere else i can really go.

Hate is emanating from my distrust.
I guess it's safe to say i've had enough.
I can't overcome all of their bluffs.
So why do they keep lying?
All of this is so one sided.
How many people will suffer before they're satisfied?
I hope it's not just me who notices that they're ruining the quality of life.
But i guess if i'm the odd one out, that's why i'm filled with so much doubt.
I guess time will tell if it'll just be my demise or some way out.
I just wish i could leave and not have any of this petty fuckery to worry about.

Maybe i'm too consumed in this seemingly catastrophic mess.
What seems like life or death to me is more or less a game to them but i swear i'll never pretend.
So i guess what's left is to try to be stronger and mend.
But this kind of life is ridiculous to me and i hope this never happens to anyone again.
Maybe i'm too weak, but i say that they're blind.
By power, evil and greed all being consumed by their mind.
So is there any hope to turn my luck around?
This has been going on for too long, i just need another sound.
But with all of these hues slowly melting together, a once vibrant rhythm has turned into a darkened and tethered leather.
So as i try to find a way to bring the pieces back together,
I'll try to hold on a little longer and hope for some better weather.

I'm the worst.
It's almost like a curse.
Can i lift off the debris?
At least it's kind of getting easier to see.
How did they make every problem me?
This hellhole is getting deeper and i just want to break free.
How do people feel superior degrading those that they see fit?
I don't understand, and there's nowhere i can sit.
My time is coming and i know i won't be missed.
But if i could trade this petty tragedy in, i'd be me without the sins.

Prying into my life and destroying anything that ever held any meaning to me, like a parasite who can't stop feeding.
I can't decide whether i should try to be strong or focus on leaving.
But this is such a petty game, worse than the masquerade.
I feel a strong sense of shame.
And all of this just keeps getting worse by the day.
How can i figure out how to rearrange the fabric of my being, to one i can handle feeling and seeing?
i know i won't end up grieving, because as people come and go, they always end up leaving.
It's just a cluster of fuckery that keeps getting blown at me, like a machine gun that won't stop reloading.
Where the **** am i even going?
If i could find a way out i would take it.
**** the masquerade and this parasitic worm just fakes it.
How can you live your life feeding on the weak?
I guess i need to dust myself off and just try to breathe.
But i'm losing here and the alliance is too hateful.
I don't know if i care anymore i just wish i could turn the tables.