Born of love
one likes to think
They never told you
Actions speak louder than words
Their actions told of no love unspoken
But instead
of resentment and anger
that you came into the world
Like a broken record
You didn't understand
You thought it all a mistake
They didn't belong to you
You came from someone else
But that was just denial
You didn't want to believe
that those who brought you forth
could be so cruel
"Sticks and stones will break my bones
but words will never hurt me."
Childhood mantra
Lies
Words strike the deepest wound
Cut through the layers
no wall impenetrable
Imprinted
in permanent ink
Or so you thought
Time moves on
death
age
illness
change the matrix
In your darkest hour
you think
"Can I forgive?
Can I forget?"
And then the demons came
travelling on the wings of death
A seemingly endless
drug-induced battle against illness
surgery on surgery
medevacs
"Come on," you say
"I can beat you all."
Bravado
but actually the truth
Demons equal rubbers
Triumph over them...
patterns, imprints erased
Enter step mother - stage right
Rug pulled
world upside down again
But you allowed it
Time stops for no man
Or woman
Age
More surgery
Mirrors
Thankful for all past events
They molded you
to the person you are
Give thanks with open heart
to he and she
For all their deeds
Their words didn't hurt you
They fertilised you
You blossomed
Build the bridge
He is old
He is your father
No denying it
Tell him you love him
With unfettered heart
And forgiveness in your voice
Be
© Jacqueline Le Sueur 2010 All Rights Reserved
https://www.jacquelinelesueur.com/post/on-the-matter-of-choice
(written in 2005)