AJ - Hello Poetry

AJ Jan 2014

You were laying in the backyard on your lawn,
And you said we had done too much MDMA so
We might as well make it a cocktail and do some K.
And as we did it off the log pile under the tree
Your nose started to bleed,
Because earlier we had done coke.
We were such dumb kids,
It is even amazing that we were still alive.
And as we ran inside to make ice cream sundaes
I tripped over my own feet,
And then decided to make out with grass,
Because I fell in love with nature.
And we found a tarp,
And some silver and purple and black and yellow paint.
And we decided to get naked and become human paintings.
And it didn't matter that I was engaged because you are gayer than Tim Gun.
And I made a pond on your back,
With fish swimming up the river of your legs.
And we took pictures
And cried because we were the most beautiful models.
You decided you were superman and tried to climb the wood pile.
You fell so gracefully,
It was like you were a moving piece of art.
I gave you stitches and accidentally sewed a heart into your leg,
You did not mind.
You told me it was the only heart you had right now.
So I told you that scared me,
That it made me want to die
And I took the scissors and cut my leg.
But you took it away
And I made out with the grass again.

Simple is as simple does,
I am here now because because.

AJ Jan 2014

Exodus

Don't tell me that I am the one who crossed a line,
When you're hiding out here with your illegitimate baby and your lost mind.
I don't care how many times you pray
With your grandmother's broken rosary.
You ****** a many, you took his money, and you blew his brains out.
Your not even sorry, your apologies don't count.
Asking Jesus to die for you again
Because you have way too many sins.

I crossed a line.

AJ Jan 2014

Tedious Tasks Can Be Quite Challenging

**** me hard and sweet and look me in the eye as I
Come to the see that being who I want isn't a
Race me to the front steps of our
Home is not always an accurate word for a physical
Place the picture of me in my cap and gown between the past and
The future us will realize that you're never too your for
Love thy neighbor as yourself is really much harder than it
Seems can fall apart but nothing ever stops you from stitching new
Ones enough sometimes, but sometimes four shots seem
Better I tell you I love you now, then wait till
Tomorrow nothing is holding me back from
Living day to day never had much appeal, I'd rather live from me to
You don't see that your daughter is suffocating because you can't let
Go with me to the moon, to the stars, and
Back then, I never really cared.
I still don't.

You can count the stars as many times as you want
But you are the earth and I am the moon.
And I will never stop revolving around you.

AJ Jan 2014

You Can't Even Make Grilled Cheese. Kocham Cię.

You know how they say
That every once in a while
You should just get in your car
And drive somewhere?
It is supposed to fulfill you
And give you joy
And relieve all your worries.
Well I've tried that.
I've tried it about a hundred times.
But the farthest I've ever gotten,
Is out for a cup of coffee.

Before I have a chance
To realize where I ended up on my mystery drive,
My car is in your driveway and
We're lying in bed,
Watching movies,
While we eat pasta salad
And you explain how you love me and my eyes
In between my telling you about something funny I read the other day.
And you rub my back,
Or caress my breast
While I lay my head on your chest
And you listen intently.

I get plenty of fulfillment from that.

AJ Jan 2014

The Bid Bad Plot Twist

Are you telling me,
That no one ever shamed little red riding hood?
She was ***** by that wolf.
And as much as you call him
The villain,
The antagonist,
The evil.
You say that she was foolish,
And gullible,
And irresponsible.
Of course.
She was a CHILD.
You all write off the wolf as bad.
Just **** him.
He is evil by nature.
No one cares.
You don't even give him a single thought.
But you tell your children
Don't explore the world on your own,
And don't trust new people,
And DON'T get *****.
Can you even **** shame a child?
She was ASKING for it?

I'm disgusted.
Don't teach little boys not to be vicious WOLVES,
Just teach little girls not to be trusting and care free Little Red Riding Hoods.
And if you think this is just about this story,
I'm even more disgusted in you.

Wake up.
WE are society.

AJ Dec 2013

Yay. 2014.

I'm so angry.
Not at people
But at situations.
If I was angry at the people
That would be quite selfish of me.
I just don't like uncertainty,
Or changes of plans.
I get very sick
And very anxious.
And now I am alone on New Years Eve.
That hasn't happened ever.
And I'm feeling quite pathetic.

AJ Dec 2013

Son XVII

The reason I haven't written a lot about Collin lately,
Is not because I have been having trouble connecting with him.
Or seeing him.
You see, I've been very self centered, and very alienated.
I think I have been trough a few tragedies this year,
And due to my inability to processes events that might hurt me,
And my ability to bury emotionally challenging memories,
I have internally wallowed for about the past 11 months.
The last month, in particular,
Has been quite bad.
Collin is my ghost baby,
And I love him with all my heart,
I still feed him,
And read to him,
And let him play with candles,
And tuck him into bed with me.
I am a **** good mother to that little ghost boy,
Especially considering I'm not a ghost myself.
But it's just been me and him.
No one else.
And we had our Christmas late at night,
And he is still learning to read,
And I still give him lots of love and kisses.
I just haven't felt the need to share any of it. Any of us.

Other stories about Collin can be found in the collection "Son", which you can find if you look in the notes down below.