Like those summers,
Long since faded from my mind,
Not special in any obvious way,
Simply a part of my life,
Like presence, like air,
Importance unnoticed,
Immemorable

I want to savor you like fine wine.
When I pull you close
it feels like I'm fireside,
and your embraces taste
like soft caramels dissolving on my tongue.

The leaves were falling,
Like fiery snowflakes,
I could only see the sky,
That day,
It was everything,
And everything was bright

Sometimes, I feel like I miss you.





                  Really, I just miss who you used to be.

Shiver.
                    Be silent,

He says:

                   *The sound,
                    Drowns my sight,
                    Keep sight,
                    A moment,
                    Be still,
                    You're only,
                    My shadow

Between the missing heartbeats,
Tangled in the silence,
In the absence of air,
The clarity of my condition arises,
Unbearable warmth under layers,
Of unsettling chills,
The sharp ache from that place,
That unreachable depth,
Of my hollow core,
The throbbing in my temples,
Behind my eyes,
From the soft hazy edges of the world,
I'm jaded and drowning,
Giving over to feelings I hate,
Loving and dying,
Aren't they the same?

Say these tears don't mean a thing,
And I will run back to you,
Say theses tears mean nothing,
So I can fall down with you,
Speak the words like they are real,
And tears will cease to fall,
You say broken hearts have never cried,
But I know the change in your voice,
When you lie

I feel the wind,
Running through my hair,
Burning through my core,
It's cold,
I feel so cold,
Like you've taken your hand,
Soft, warm, safe,
Torn it from mine,
And allowed the warmth,
To escape,
Into the cruel, lonely world,
Replaced by icy air,
Making my blood run cold

I know I'm missing out,
But it doesn't bother me,
Not all the time,
Because mostly,
I don't feel anything,
But the pain

We didn't know your favourite song,
so we chose one from your home town.
A quiet hymn about the joy of God;
I'm sure you would have frowned
behind the outward smile,
as you looked down from above
to bear witness to the solemn mourning.

Nobody wants to be with a girl
who sits up late at night in her room
dissecting disposable razors with her fingernails
just so she can feel.

Everybody wants to fall in love.

I just want to fall in love with you.

In a world full,
Of 'no's and 'never's,
Bursting with 'tomorrow's,
Though out of 'now's,
Drowning in sorrow,
And struggling for joy,
What truly matters?

I broke one of my dad's razors.
I couldn't stand it anymore,
so I picked it apart with
my scissors and pulled away
the deformed plastic frame.
I stole the glimmering blade
and bent it like paper
between my fingers.
I was intoxicated by the
sight of it. I pressed it
tentatively against my skin,
like the feather light touch
of a lover, and caressed my
veins with it's edge.


I can't stop.

You can watch,
The same sun fall,
Day after day,
You can keep your memories,
And pretend,
You can lie all you want,
But I don't want to anymore

How many people have I known;
taking them into me,
speaking that universal, ancient language
of intimate bodies.
All the beds I've slept in,
all the hands that have felt me move
as I dance the age old dance.

In the light,
My troubles fade,
But the darkness calls the shadows,
And pulls the weight of sorrow,
Over my shoulders,
The voice of yesterday,
Stronger by night,
Calls me to the end

I feel so far away,
A cold shadow,
Lost in the distance,
Walking without destination,
Aching for the sun,
To rest its gentle rays around me,
For the rain to fall,
And trace the ridge of my spine,
I watch the black of my eyelids,
And see the oceans,
Surrounding deep, black voids,
Glistening ebony spheres,
In a sea that swallows me whole

I look into other men's eyes
and see your flecked blue irises.
Every few faces has your smile
or the creases from around your lips.
Every strong, freckled shoulder
is your reincarnated skin.

I can't keep your fragments
from haunting me.

It's like stumbling through a fog:
I'm reaching desperately for anything,
but you can't hold on
when all you have is broken dreams
that collapse between your fingers.

If you believe that word called "love",
Even when it's whispered in your ear,
So honest and gentle,
It'll blow your world to pieces,
'Til you bleed over the sunsets,
With that word like broken glass,
Cutting through your open heart,
The only love you've ever know,
Only aiming to let go

Stop for a moment,
You've been under,
For far too long now,
The surface is out of reach,
It's darker than your remember,
Close your eyes,
Once more

I wish I were a paper plane;
that I had a sky
in which to roam.

Tell me,
Do I smell of poison,
You never minded before,
I guess I took it too far,
The taste is too much now,
You always liked that,
I never thought you'd change,
Just notice for once,
I'm still the same

The world's weight,
Rests on our shoulders,
Growing heavier by the second,
Dragging us down,
Into the depths of oblivion,
Empty oblivion,
As the bleeding,
Pulls us further

The heat escapes,
Bleeding from every part of me,
I'm blue,
I'm frozen,
I'm tracing red lines,
With steel and ice,
They're breaking me apart,
Pouring my blood into the snow,
They've taken all of me,
And left me to the darkness