It's not because I don't love you,
Or that you don't make me happy,
It's not that I don't want to change,
That I'm tired of it all,
I've just forgotten how to breathe,
I've forgotten how to see,
My vision's clouded over,
All I need is to be reminded,
To be taught how to feel,
Something that doesn't break me,
Or make me tumble to the floor,
I need you to look past,
The thoughts, the blood, the feelings,
And find what used to be,
Light

The edges burn to black,
The light is fading,
I bleed the colours,
From my eyes,
And swallow my dreams,
Banishing them,
To the darkest hollows,
Of my mind,
As I prepare,
For tomorrow's disappointment

In a world full,
Of 'no's and 'never's,
Bursting with 'tomorrow's,
Though out of 'now's,
Drowning in sorrow,
And struggling for joy,
What truly matters?

Downcast your eyes,
To watch the broken path,
The footsteps finally stolen,
From beneath you,
Another blood-smear,
On the once white pavement

You were so close,
I could feel your weight,
Your hand on my shoulder,
Your words were foreign,
But the message clear,
Aged, yet so full of life,
I would have died,
To give you one more moment,
A goodbye,
It wasn't your time

Her eyes are closed,
But the ground's still shaking,
The frost has settled,
But the water's still racing,
The air is still,
Nobody's breathing

Find me in the snow,
You'll be seconds,
Too late,
The winter's calling,
Could you hear the darkness,
You never felt the darkness,
Pulling me away

The coldness settles,
Surrounding me,
I shrink into the fog,
Letting the frost,
Eat out my eyes,
And turn my world,
To grey,
As the winter grows,
Inside me

I'm falling back,
Into old habits,
Drawing my lines,
Through the loneliness,
Giving in,
To the emptiness,
Open my eyes,
Remind me where we are

The heat escapes,
Bleeding from every part of me,
I'm blue,
I'm frozen,
I'm tracing red lines,
With steel and ice,
They're breaking me apart,
Pouring my blood into the snow,
They've taken all of me,
And left me to the darkness

I'm slipping away,
Watch the sky burn,
As I fade to dust,
Let the earth,
Rise up in flames,
I'm losing my shadow,
In the fire

He takes my hand,
Runs his fingers,
Through the broken veins,
Whispering the same words,
The lies that caught me,
Every time,
He fills my mind,
With sleepless nights,
Listening for Death's sirens,
As our blood stains the floor,
Red bleach filled with poison,
He finds my eyes,
Keep them closed,
I keep them closed,
To hide his tears,
To keep from drowning,
I turn away from yesterday

In the light,
My troubles fade,
But the darkness calls the shadows,
And pulls the weight of sorrow,
Over my shoulders,
The voice of yesterday,
Stronger by night,
Calls me to the end

The world is darkening,
With every step,
The air grows colder,
He's closer,
Too close for comfort

I'm the girl with the scars,
With the blade in her fingers,
Blood and brittle bones,
The girl with the bruises,
With the troubled mind,
Darkness in excess,
I'm the girl without light,
The broken one,
The dying one,
I'm a girl,
I'm a mess

It used to be simple,
No pain, no accusations,
Like breathing,
But it never lasted long

I was so naive,
To think we'd see it all,
That he'd stay for tomorrow,
Though the end was so close,
We were young,
Believing in forever,
Could we have known?

The winter winds,
The grey skies,
Exactly as I remember,
It seems I never left

Into the starless night,
The dim moon fades,
Clouds consume the sky,
Flooding the horizon,
With the impatience of day

Being away from you,
Is all I really fear,
When you're gone,
The darkness, the emptiness,
Emerges once again,
Stronger than before,
As I stand in your wake,
With nothing,
But the torment of feeling,
Knowing how easily,
You could forget me

Between the missing heartbeats,
Tangled in the silence,
In the absence of air,
The clarity of my condition arises,
Unbearable warmth under layers,
Of unsettling chills,
The sharp ache from that place,
That unreachable depth,
Of my hollow core,
The throbbing in my temples,
Behind my eyes,
From the soft hazy edges of the world,
I'm jaded and drowning,
Giving over to feelings I hate,
Loving and dying,
Aren't they the same?

I feel so far away,
A cold shadow,
Lost in the distance,
Walking without destination,
Aching for the sun,
To rest its gentle rays around me,
For the rain to fall,
And trace the ridge of my spine,
I watch the black of my eyelids,
And see the oceans,
Surrounding deep, black voids,
Glistening ebony spheres,
In a sea that swallows me whole

The words were never new,
It's all been said before,
The rain, the days,
The emotions never ours,
And yet I love you all the same,
With all my ingenuity,
I'll find you in the stars

Like a house of cards,
All that I was,
Came tumbling down,
Fallen to the floor,
Scattered around me,
I sought solace in my vices,
In pain and lies,
I lost myself in arms,
Arms that didn't hold me,
Quite the same,
That slipped away,
Too fast to close the wounds,
I left my emotions on the sand,
Drenched in poison,
My reasons in summers past,
Until you opened my eyes

Utter defeat,
Bleeds like poison,
from these futile tears,
Carelessness,
Is all he has to offer,
Closer to the door,
With every second,
My words,
Can no longer hold him back,
I know I mean nothing,
From the moment he leaves,
I carry the weight,
Of worthlessness

It was too much,
Yet all in the same,
It wasn't enough,
He tore at my insides,
We fell in sync,
But I wouldn't die,
For his vanity

Clouds befall the canvas,
Of the black, starry night,
Your voice,
A gentle harmony,
Playing on the wind,
The horizon falls from focus,
Matched with the flutter,
Of restless eyes,
The silence of the night,
Finds me back beside you

Sign me up for hell,
I'm no better than you,
God bore me no soul,
I'll take my death wish,
My satanic mercy,
I rather forfeit to temptation,
Than force bitter life upon myself,
In the name of God,
Escaping sin for second chances,
Call me faithless,
I'll be ******

Soar o'er the sky,
Paint feathers on the clouds,
Breathe life,
Into the hollows,
Of the waxen, silver moon,
Fall like tears,
Brightness rippling on the ocean,
Gold in the summer sand,
Be not forgotten,
To the violet sky,
A mirror shattered,
By the lightning in your eyes,
Your eyes filled with shards,
Glass and broken stars,
Grace the birds with sun

It used to be a game,
A bet with chance,
A cross with time,
With years gone by,
The reasons changed,
I bleed to survive,
I'm anchored by pain