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 May 2018 aslan
Abi Cash
My heart beats,
My soul speaks,
You might be the one,
I'll give my love to keep,
Emotions showing,
My smile glowing,
You might the one,
It's my mind you're blowing,
When we're having fun,
My confusion comes undone,
No questions unknown,
Because you might be the one.
Honestly I hope you are the one
 May 2018 aslan
Abi Cash
The angel lost her grace
As mascara ran down her face
She forgot love, remembered hate
She no longer had her faith

With tear stained cheeks
Through bloodshot eyes
She saw only pain and suffering
Love, she couldn't conquer

As the blue sky faded to black
Darkness filled her heart
Her wings vanished from her back
And her kindness fell apart

Even with all her might
Her dress still went black from white
She was sent to save
To help those who weren't brave

But as she looked around
At the marks she left...
Tear stained cheeks
And bloodshot eyes
I wanna give up
 May 2018 aslan
Abi Cash
Drug World
 May 2018 aslan
Abi Cash
Paxil to make you happy
**** to make you high
Nyquil to make you sleep
Energy shots to make you active

I'm told to feel a certain way
Suddenly heartbreak doesn't feel sad
And tears don't feel salty anymore
Love doesn't feel good at all
And pain is something I can't feel
A drug filled world is where I live

Prozac to make you glad
Mary Jane to make you rad
Atarax to make you tired
Dayquil to make you work

I'm fumbling in ecstasy
Living life sounds make believe
My reflection looks old and weary
An old soul has more zing than me
I can't get pleasure even from me
A drug filled world I where I live

Zoloft to make you smile
Mushrooms to make you fly
Tylenol to make you weak
Aleve to make you strong

I'm losing my mind
There is no strength even in my finger tips
My legs search for a firm grip
My heart seems to have stopped
And my mind can't control me anymore
A drug filled world is where I live
 May 2018 aslan
Abi Cash
Proud
 May 2018 aslan
Abi Cash
I come with no wrapping or pretty pink bows
I am who I am from my head to my toes
I tend to get loud when speaking my mind
Even a little crazy some of the time
I'm not a size 5 and don't care to be
You can be you and I can be me
I try to stay strong when pain knocks me down
And the times that I cry are when no one's around
To error is human or so that's what they say
Well tell me, who's perfect anyway
I sure as hell am not perfect
 May 2018 aslan
Abi Cash
I Love You
 May 2018 aslan
Abi Cash
I never really knew you
you were just another friend
But when I got to know you
I let my heart unbend

I couldn't help past memories
That would only make me cry
I had to forget my first love
And give another try

So I've fallen in love with you
And I'll never let you go
I love you more than anyone
I just had to let you know

My feelings for you will never change
Just know my feelings are true
Just remember this one thing
I will always love you
I only have two days left with you and it ***** so much
 May 2018 aslan
Abi Cash
Carry On
 May 2018 aslan
Abi Cash
I don't hate you
Because I still love you
I can't look at you
Because it hurts to
We don't talk
Because there is nothing left to say
You apologized
But I just walked away
I'm leaving you and the thought of you behind
Because I just need to clear my mind
I'm angered because you wasted my time
Hurt because I believed you were mine
But I just didn't see the signs
I guess that's why they say love is blind
Because you got my heart caught in binds
Look me in my eyes
And listen as my heart cries
Cries out in pain
This feeling makes me feel like I'm covered in flames
Until ashes are all that remain
Thought you were different
But you're all the same
Thought this was real
But it was all a game
I gave you my love
And you gave it away
That's why my heart is blue
And my skies are gray
Will I ever see the light of day?
Will this dark cloud ever go away?
Or will it follow me for my remaining days?
Grasp all my joy and strip it away?
No I am too bold.
Way too bold to be stuck in the cold
I am way too strong not to carry on
I can live without you
 May 2018 aslan
Abi Cash
Habit
 May 2018 aslan
Abi Cash
It controls her
She can't stop it
It's a constant battle
She can't drop it

It has become a habit
She can't quit
It's taking over her body
Bit by bit

The scars fade
But the memories don't
She wants them to leave
But they refuse.. They won't

It's an on going battle.
It's a fight she never wins
It's a constant struggle
It's a war that never ends

It's her sweet escape
It gets her lost in her own place
She gets to control the pain
As her adrenaline starts to race

She grabs it off the dresser
As a tear falls from her cheek
She presses even harder
Reminding herself not to shriek

No one understands
No one ever will
This habit now controls her
As the world around her stands still

But now the room is spinning
Her head is getting light
She falls back in her bed
Refusing to put up a fight

She takes one last breath as she turns out the lights
Then she closes her eyes as she calls it a night
No one ever understands my scars
 May 2018 aslan
Abi Cash
Running, running
far away
Escaping dreams
of yesterday.
Faster, faster
there I go
Forgetting things
you'll never know.
Dying, dying
deep inside
Find a place
for me to hide.
Catching, catching
up with me
No more running
from reality.
Stopping, stopping
let me cry
Finding a way
to say goodbye.
yep
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