He was always learning open to grow it was tough for others to accept him. He was use to rejection. He was always doing extra going the distance and beyond. He did it right knew it was the right thing to do.
He wanted to speak up but knew his mouth could ruin his chances and opportunities. He was kind and respectful even when things didn't go according to plan he told himself to work harder. Be better take it to the next level.
He looked in the mirror asked himself what happened? Where did it all go wrong? He learned somethings are beyond his say and had no control. He remained loyal to them, while they taunted him with a job title. He deserved, realized he's meant for more. Meant for better he didn't always settle because he knew things usually proving himself to the wrong people.
It was a tough time for him always lost in the translation. He was old school spoke when spoken to. Didn't date because his family would never approval; why put someone you love through that.

He felt lost without his grandpa the family was being taken over by bad leadership. Coping was hard so many imposed their way of life on others. Talking like if they are righteous and know what's best for others. All they was pry in others business when no one asked.
Sad what they've become than have the nerve to judge others. Putting them in the hot seat like they do to everyone else who tried to live an average joe life.
You'd think it would humble them but the greed for control makes them think they are superior.

Took all the pain to stay sane
Bad memories remain immunity
Our situation shattered circumstance
Inspired by frustration overcoming it all
Not enough for the judgemental family
Too much for the toxic world

He remembers when he didn't have a job but he would do chores or run errands since he had his license. He was mistreated by cousins who thought they knew better but stilled with grandma. They tried to guilt him about paying rent and help with bills. He would feel bad till one day he had a conversation with grandma and the truth would come out. It was him dealing with another family that would take from his shine some how make it about them.
He got use to being in the background most of the time it was a fight to be included. Making him feel not good enough, ready to walk away making himself available was a waste of his time. He never thought bad about family but they never thought highly of him. He had done stuff but he didn't want kids or to get married.
Divorces rates were high in the family and he didn't want to be another statistic. Children used as an excuse while failed relationships putting on a public front.

Being told not to complain not taking crap from anyone. Dealing with people who tried to shadow him. He didn't like how they tried to turn everyone on him because they couldn't get their way.
All the betrayal all the disrespect when he stood his ground the hatred great. He went along to keep the peace but part of him would die being among their ways. He didn't care to feel their egos or let take his kindness for granted.
He waa never called just to keep contact only when they needed something or they didn't bother with him. He loved family but tired of seen everyone being used and talked about. They think they are right because they own property how they treat people says more.
He stood alone lost in translation ready to argue and fight but remember he had nothing to gain and they had nothing to offer so he walked away. He regrets making time for them thinking theyd approve maybe accept him.

Going through the motions before the real thing most hate practice but practice is where you develop and grow your skills. Trying to find a new jujitsu gym not into the politics. Just want to train and grow in the sport.
He didn't care for politics, they were never in his favor. Over all the labels others tried placing on him. He was more than the baby sitter since these parents didn't take him serious. He didn't have a job but helped out got involved as he rose they kept him out. He would find his own way back on his own path. He was tried of explaining to people who didn't listen.
Being around people that didn't value him. He was burnt out from it all and lost it all thinking how to get back on track and do it right.

Talking about it is always hard but once you bring it to the light turns out you are not the only one going through it. The best feeling is when others understand. It gets easier to deal with. Stops you from empowering fear.
Feeling on edge over dumb possibilities that play out in the mind all these made up scenarios. Playing out in his head. Remembering a bad time and moment never wanting to end up there once again.

They'll hate you for speaking up he thought about the consequences. Just because you bully everyone doesn't mean you are right. Mind your business stop telling people how to live their life.
No one owe you or has to explain themselves to you. This argument plays out in the mind but the words won't come out. Makes sure you are right before you talk about anyone.
What hurts most is the people you valued and respect; don't see or treat you the same.
He was tired of the lies when he was honest. He seen them as an equal and they want nothing to do with him. They try to make him feel bad but he's been disappointed for year.
They like to get a reaction of people he learned to not give in show any feelings or emotions.
If others seen him overreact they'd assume he was making a scene or had the problem. Being provoked by them was a waste of time he'd walk away. They expected him to change and they made no effort to treat others right.

He didn't want people laughing or talking about him. He was private yet the people talking did worse. He wanted to find love so he waited. While others had meaningless relationships and kids that got stuck in the middle.
Not a parent but those kids come first their needs. Its about them now so some need to get over themselves. He would observe see the double standard as they try to justify their wrong doing.
He made a mistake they would prey on him like if was plotting. They tried to hold his flaws over his head especially when they've done way worse.
He wanted to be around family but they act like they have it bad and mad about something. Taking it out on family instead of confronting those who wronged them.
He was thankful to have a room and somewhere to stay. He didn't make a fuss or say anything. Some trying to pull rank talking like they pay bills when all they did save up.

He observed tried to understand but didn't get why others acted, or did the things they do. Some people can look you in the eyes and lie to you. Others have bright ideas trying to dump their work on you. Take all the credit dumping on the workers; who made them look good.
He dealt with self centered entitled ******; no matter, what happen it always became about them. If you didn't make it about them they don't care or give a **** about you. He protected them and loved them but didn't agree with their behavior and attitude.
He stood his ground after years of having their back. They didn't like him for having an opinion or speaking his mind. They'd throw him under to hide the fact they are doing worse.
He took a step back and walked away. He didn't care to be judged but that's their way of trying to be controlling.

Back on this writing project, trying to believe in it. Get lost in the story creating character some are too much finding the chemistry. Building up in the mind hyping things up. Slow down figuring it out over time.
Tired of them dulling his shine
Someone was always mad or offended
Tired of walking egg shells
All they did was talk about everyone
They were no better or worse off
He minded his business that's on them
Held them responsible for those actions
If a made a mistake being extra cautious. Never hear the end of it

In his mind that moment he seen it
But knew what needed to be done
He loved the sport wanted to add
His influence be part of it of it
The training to make it to the next level
Taking time making them steps
Going through the motions
Slowing it down being smart
Taking calm trying not to over react
Laying on his back trying to see it
Imagine himself doing it with finesse
Doing it right staying focused on the game

Watched highlights and missed it
Went to see his nephew play
The mindset came back he missed coaching
On the field thinking about things
Resting his body ready to explode
On the mats was his escape
Cautious because of his strength
Trying not to hurt others
Forgetting his troubles unwinding
Focused on technique coordination
Rumors spread he was hurt
The gym owner asked he was insulted
Annoyed how work conflicted with training
Had to work he was born poor
Taking on struggle trying to grow
Everything he had was earned not given

Always putting up with their nonsense
Called them on the bs they got defensive
Chameleon kid the one who spoke up
In the background seeing all the drama
Silent mouth came at him with a tone
Minding his own they try to impose their will
He's working hard knows what's going on
Two faced people fake to one another
He told the truth said it to their face
Now they mad for being exposed
Told to never let himself to anyone
When they are doing worse
Expecting you to turn a blind eye
Mad because they got caught up
Doing what's right help others
Do a good deed trying to be a better person
Others provoking starting fights

Turned the other cheek and kept his mouth closed. When he spoke up and everyone acts like he doesn't have feelings or emotions. He was silent keeping the peace. They tried to ruin his inner peace take away from him.
He was his own person and didn't belong to anyone.
They told him he was crazy for challenging himself. Pushing his limits he slowed down, but was conserving energy. Stop wasting it on people, who drained him. He didn't care to feed needy insecure egos. He refuse to use people to get ahead or take advantage.

Finding ways to past time not fond of down time always said you can't get in trouble if you're making money. Get lost in yard work and washing cars to get out of this insanity. Listening to music while writing. Finished a book now starting another feeling the mind drift away from all the nonsense that robs the heart of peace.
Being kind to everyone even when they vilify you for being different. Not a follower or a sheep been making another path. always working on something not sure what to do with it but invested in it all.

It was never about that. So many joke but cant take it then all of a sudden get personal. He would mind his mouth he'd burn up because he wouldn't respond but once he mad a remark everyone acted like he was out of line.
While they run their mouth being passive the truth burned them mostly because they couldn't get their way.

He started to read more escape his loopy wild thoughts that seemed overwhelming not the solution. Feeling his mindset change, he missed being an athlete. It was part of him but aged out feeling like it caught up with him.
He had a place in his heart they didn't always have a spot saved for him. He loved to practice that was where he went all out and gave his all. Even if he didn't get to be his best he knew he brought the best out in others.

He wrote about what bigger him and how ir made him feel. He worked hard and came up short. He had to come up with a better plan back to the drawing board.
He wasn't afraid to try most of all he hated feeling like it was a waste of time. He gave them his all in the end it wasn't good enough. He would ask what he did wrong or how could he improve always open to learn and grow.
He changed for himself so many wanted him to be someone he's not or be the old him. He had grown there was no going back. He hated feeling stuck just trying to level up get to the next level.

He loved her she didn't feel the same way back. When he seen her with another guy is destroyed him he felt unworthy. The betrayal was on a whole other level. He didn't fight because she never belong to him when he moved on she'd come back. It really messed with his mind. She told him he was a good friend then got into a relationship. She claimed to love him now that she's married he wanted to be friends now he gets why he can't be connected to couples. The frustration and complication.

He was use to being hated because they'd rather knock/exclude since he wasn't a follower, or in check like everyone else. They'd never accept him because he had an option. He was tired of taking their crap in silence when he speaks up they make him out to be a villain for not being part of their scheme.
All terms and conditions got annoying if you asked them they would act like you're ruining their life or plotting against them. While they cant win alone so they gain numbers trying to turn everyone against you for not caring.
After showing interest and still kept out there was no reason to stay it wasn't worth it anymore. He moved on the more he stayed away the worse they got. If he made a mistake it would be held against him. If they made a error they'd expect you to turn a blind eye over all the double standards.

They'll never own up or take responsibility for their actions. He knew how they made him felt so he cut the cord. They'd try to tell him to grow up than understand or try to make sense of the chaos they caused.
He respected people not material possessions.
It didn't mean you had say or control over people for owning a home. Everyone is a hard working adult trying to get by they don't need you twisting their arms for money. Half the time everyone is on the **** list. Because they don't listen to your made up standards you're not even living up to.

He never said anything to them because all they did was talk about everyone. He never talked about anyone, if he has something to say he would said it to their face. They want everyone to chang, but never want to change themselves. He knew he wasn't perfect, so he never said anything about anyone.
He loved them but kept a distance since they wanted him to alter himself. He was over the fact they would pick and choose when to accept him. He went through change they dk his history or back story. He just wanted to be accepted for him out respect for his elders he kept his mouth shut.

He had down time so he would get lost in books and writing those things made him laugh and smile. He wasn't afraid to be alone but he was feeling betrayed used up then they were done and wanted nothing to do with him. He was willing to go the extra mile make it easy for himself. Doing a job no one wanted because of the rough area. He took pride in his work everything changed and was different a whole new world and vibe.

Niko went to the bar and chatted it up with the bartender Penelope. They talked about dating and she wanted to help him come up with a solution. He would find out she had a be.
He would sit at the bar and talk without having a drink his sobriety was key. He made mistakes and hurt people not being intoxicated kept him from being a wild one.
Penelope was a beautiful girl a caring person. Niko was not use to pretty girls showing concern she was nice on the eyes and easy to talk with. She appreciated his honesty he said some funny stuff that was true.
He told her that he wanted to take her out once he got full time at his current job. It never happened and that opportunity to ask her out was gone. Things didn't line up or turn out the way Niko planned it.

Tired of all the hazing the only one who toughed it out went through it all. Made more effort to be kept out feeling like, he didn't matter, or belong. Asking himself, "why did he stay," they obviously didn't like him, and he didn't always agree with how things were handled. Another made up standard to live up to when they didn't have it together.
He had another life before they crossed paths they can't take credit for him and all his efforts. They can't tell him, how to feel, or think.
They dk what's going on in his head. He may not argue, say much but refused to let them take advantage of his kindness. Once he spoke up that's when everyone kept him out. Before they'd taunt him, let him think, he could be one of them. He was okay and moved on. No reason to stay felt it wasn't worth it anymore.

He was annoyed he'd let them know to see if they were interested. No one seemed to care or show any interest. Then when he would do it they would try to lay a guilt trip.
He got upset with their antics because if it was a role switch he would've said yes or no. None of this making them feel like he was causing conflicts in their schedule. It wasn't his fault or fair with him they demanded answers after a while he got tired of explaining himself. Now they are trying to make him out to be the troublemaker before he embraced it now he walks away from it all.

Each punch thrown
Every kicked landed
All the chaos fades away
The white noise bring peace
Pushing through the insanity
Pushing yourself to be better
Bring out your best everytime
Bring out the best in others
All the personal growth a gain
The experience with rich lessons
Brings out confidence

Still working for it, doesn't mean, it's not going to happen. Would rather earn it than let it be given or handed out. Working for that promotion fixing the struggle within. Not arguing with people, who use judge and put forth no effort.
They try to cast a shadow but they can't full the light. They may have it all but no one owes them. Applauding their efforts don't knock everyone for trying to achieve their goals. Trying to make their dream a reality. No one needs your opinion to go through to make it to the next level.
Usually running on anger, but coped dealing with all this over being self destructive. Finding faith that's the only way even though it's tough a hard walk life style to live by. Praying trusting in God cant do this alone anymore physically and emotionally drained.

The worse part about positing is someone will think. I'm talking about them looking for ways to hold a grudge. Sorry they have a guilty conscience. The family is the worse trying to pick a fight they'll try to turn everyone against you.
For showing feelings having emotions getting older can't keep holding all that anger and frustration in. It all comes out eventually. Sad to deal with that but it helps you grow and gain to be a stronger person.

Learned to do what makes you happy so many double standards. Most expect results if you don't prove yourself; they don't care about what you feel or think. It's sad how they are quick to judge than understand. Your situation or what you've been through just to come out even by barely getting by.
After a while you stay away.

Fighting for change everything remains the same. So much struggle hard to gain. Always coming up short, don't care for the politics. Been focused on the work lost inside the project. Writing to stay sane so much injustice double standards seen and treated differently.

Fight to stay alive to be heard
Everyday a life or death situation
Hard to live pursue the dream
Dead inside become immune to toxic
Trying to escape hate give into faith
Others trying to dictate your fate
Pouring it into the universe
See what comeback this way
Energy levels draining slow
Good vibes positivity on the rise

A sore body stiff joints
Pushing through an older body
Mentally blocking out the bad
Physically going through the motions
He missed them but they are gone
He's not going back to them
They are never returning to him
He let go fear free accepted
Alone is the way to be pain free
Found closure with his thoughts
His heart cages to heal
Soon to be set free be himself
That's all he truly wanted out life
Be happy with out consequence
Not answer to others for his efforts

All these fears because of others
Worried about their judgement
Always talking bad on others
Expecting others to change
While remaining the same
Over come this pain suffering within
More hurt from annoying people
Writing the narrative adds a tone
Doesn't change the reality
A beat up ego toughening up
Pride swallowed a dry mouth
Choking making it hard to breathe

Quick to close of this heart
The cruel world falling apart
Starting over once again
Another wicked chapter ends
From hurt to glory the healing begun
Another wild journey to pursue
Everything has changed turn the page
Things fades with time wise with age
The unsung hero story needs to be told
A loving heart never gets old
Open to new growing with experience
Each encounter building character

Wanted to write stories talking about the struggle. Internal conflict trying to resolve it all. Always taking on the world other peoples frustration hiding behind it so hard to open up. Always seeing good in others over trusting. Always protecting them but they are quick to blame others than own up. He made jokes at the wrong time tried to see good with the bad.
His opinion was ignored or shut down now they expect him to go along with their madness. He preferred to be alone they called him rebel because he wasn't one of them and didn't care to be one of them. He got along with everyone; he didn't respect people who talked behind his back. If they said it to his face, it might've ****** him off but he appreciated the person for it.
As he listened to music looking for inspiration but learned to live life and share stories. Even with the condition everyone has been through everyone has a problem or going through something.

Always been into hard work saying it will pay so many road blocks and detours but chasing a dream. Its the worse when you try and it never turns out in my head of accordingly. Building off the experience learning from the encounter. Thought this would work didn't want a boss but a team to make film and get my scripts/sketches made.
Always open to creative ideas trying to make them a reality. Never seen as an equal but working twice as hard.

Big on being yourself some try to box you in change you because they arent happy with themselves. Those people are fake pretending to be someone they are not. They can't beat you one one so they talk about you get Every one to hate you because they are useless alone.
I question their logic because they always get their way even if it means hurting or ******* people. I've learned to not empower these kind of people. So many times it's about them with hidden agendas.

He was tired another fight wasn't the same over all the physical and mental pain. Taking a time out changing it up. Making the most of the moment and situation.
So much change doing it all over not the same. Feels like a lost cause made it have value now it's worthless. Always looking in from the outside. once on the inside he wanted out. Never going to change he was stripped down not himself with anyone. So many made him out to be someone he's not.

He wasn't one to judge anyone, he was trying to better his situation. Fix himself since He seen and been through stuff. He didn't use or take advantage of anyone to get there. He was always working for his learning to say what he wanted. He got tired of going with the flow because it never ended well. In the end felt robbed and cheated by everything. Provoked by people he valued that made him feel worthless.
Came up short on those effort. Tried and did more since no one else cared or put forth any effort.
Once he spoke up or called them on their action they would try to blame or give an attitude because they got caught. He might've looked busy but did observe the situation.

Everything came to a halt now he's helping family. Not use to being home always working doing something. Writing helped maintain insanity put things in to perspective dhe to a series of unfortunate events.
Never about money and treated people. Always doing favors never expecting anything in return the moment you aren't able to, they treat you different. Act like you've never been there the whole time. Its the worse feeling after helping them and never took a cent.
Made time to be there to help them now they put you on the outside looking in. Waited on deck to claim the wrong make it right. Moved on now they try to tell you when they wanted nothing to do with you.
Thinking they care but only when its at their own selfish benefit. Then send you packing.

He couldn't grasp it and it didn't make sense he was working hard getting by while others are given everything and ungrateful. It was eating at him all the hatred and disrespect that came his way. He minded his mouth most of all his business.

He love training who knew the kid he trained didn't want to do it. He felt heart broken and felt he lost it all. Everything taken away hitting rock bottom. Thinking of a plan how to bounce back. Open to learn grow so many detours and setback.
He put others first don't always know what to do with himself. Writing was all he had it numbed him took his pain and anxiety away.
He stepped up when no one else would. Always trying to do and be better while coming up short.

He wasn't scared he didn't care what they did. All they did was ignore him try to make him do and be someone he was not. When he spoke up stood his ground they hated him.
When he went along part of him died inside and he hated himself because he wasn't like then, all the lowering to be like and accepted it all gor old. They never changed most of all never be happy for him. Family hit hard hurt him the most with silly standards they weren't even living up to. He wasn't two faced to pick and choose when to care.

He always put others first once he talked about making moves and moving on they'd turn on him. He did what they wanted but needed to do it his way. It always led to conflict and fall outs because of conflict of interest. He was use to being the bad guy because everyone has to be right never admitting their wrongs.
He was done always for them they shook him down. If he ever asked for help or a favor they'd treat him like a nobody after. Made him feel useless and invisible. While they sponged and leeched doing all the things they told him not to do.

Down time is weird he felt like he needed to be doing something getting things done. Use to a routine when all he wanted was to be free feeling lost and isolated from things.
His sleep patterns were jacked up over the changes. He didn't like being responsible for others but it all fell on his lap.
All the anger and frustration took its toll on his confidence. He wanted to be there to help they left him hanging. Now that he made other arrangements they decided to need him ruining his plans

He would argue and say the truth everyone got mad. It was a struggle for him to be heard. Everyone acts like their social circle matters or contributes. They did nothing for him once he made his own moves they had the nerve to be mad.
They are not responsible for him and will never be happy for him. They never gave him his props and tried to shadow his success because they owned a home. Like if their opinion mattered more or meant anything to him.
He didn't kiss *** but worked hard busting his *** for what he has. He refused to lower himself to be liked and accepted. He was too old to play games be labeled and boxed in. In the end they didn't care they used him and got what they wanted.
They never called unless they wanted something. If they expected anything from him he did favors but never expected anything in return. They mad him mad and sad he minded his mouth and business but their BS kept coming in his direction.

He was over the lies and manipulation. He cut the cord. He didn't care that they had kids or got married. He was annoyed that they made out anything he did to be a bad thing. He never talked about anyone but they always had stuff to say behind his back. He respected them enough to say it to their face. Most of the time; he ignored everyone, and minded his business; most of all his mouth.
He was pushed out for being singles; he hated to be around couples. All they did was argue make things awkward. Then because of their bad communication blamed him. He was frazzled, how is so called friends; called him family then cut him off; what a way to treat family.
He warned his friend about her past, but love conquers all, so it didn't matter; what he said, or what he thought. His chapter ended he faded out and went away a lone rebel on his way.

Sad to see everyone go away
Everyone getting older part of life
Tired of being rushed to matter
Never been materialistic
Be a good person hope the right people appreciate you and your efforts