Everything was tough so he walked away but he had no peace since it was in the back of his mind. Siblings taken away by social services and father back in prison. A mother that would have to work to get her kids back. While he tried to pursue his education wanted to help his family but couldn't do anything to help. Eventually he'd put everything on hold and come back home. His dreams haunting and taunting him because he was close but yet so far. Everyone would be united fall back into places. Back to the child hood home for his parents and one sibling everyone grew up. Seem to be doing some chose a relationship and others focused on bettering their situation.
He watched them make mistakes but could since it wasn't his life or gave them advice warned them but no one listened to him because they thought they knee better but when they tried to tell him they crossed the line because he already made those mistakes and learned.

He stopped empowering the crazy that fueled the family hatred. Everyone wanted him to be or act a certain way. Focused on his goals and dreams he stopped making excuses anxious to get it done make it happen. He could see himself graduating with his college degree its part of his journey he started but life took him away from it. Working part time but doing fill time jobs.
He met so many people on his journey met the right ones. That would connect him with the right in the right direction. He got support instead of trying to prove himself to be accepted. Learning about mutual love and respect instead of everything being so one sided. Working hard waking up sore with lower back pain. Trying not to stress out over things he has no say or control over.
He always had writing to see it put things into context sometimes things would happen and didn't always know how to act or respond. He learned to walk away instead of carry the burdens of the world on his shoulders.
Someone was always mad or holding a grudge he wasn't responsible for their happiness. They chose to behave and act that way. He did his best to not hurt others or get hurt.

The things that mattered to him treated him like he didn't matter. Taking one for the team but the team never had his back. Being called spicy if he opened his mouth. Not saying anything made him feel provoked. Speaking up would lead to more criticism. Trying to do his work and go home home. He thought about dating but that pool is shallow waters and slim pickings. Told to stack paper he knew money couldn't buy happiness.
After a few failed relationships he was okay with his own company. Learned to be more selective and not rush things. He wanted things to come natural not be forced.

He was inspired to pursue his dreams after placing them on hold. He wanted to help but had nothing to offer. He learned that he would have to help himself first. After being insulted by someone he thought highly of. Always assumed the worse or expected him to fail.
Bouncing back knowing he's not seen as an equal but working harder than those whom judged and labeled him. He was never materialistic and treated people right that said more than possessions. In the trenches making moves while others say back watch him do the work once he made it they wouldn't give him any credit. He had a chip on his shoulder but it never went to his head.
Everyone would point out the flaw and mistakes rather than give him any credit. He'd cross things off his to do list while others would add ideals or standards that kept him out of had nothing to do with but expected him to live up to these standards.

He knew he'd be excluded for not agreeing seen different for having an opinion. Usually a push over and taken lightly this time he stood his ground.
Why should he give up who he is to be liked to be accepted when everyone else made no changes or a difference to help others. He was tired of all the expectation of others.
They didn't care what he thought or how he felt. Like anything they said or did was more important. He cleared his mind showing no feelings or emotions wore a bold face as they bad mouth him to anyone who would listen. They looked down on him because he didn't give up on himself since he didn't do anything wrong.

Not everyone things or feels the way he does. Laying in his bed reflecting his week. Wondering what else is out there beyond the work routine. He thought about friends but doesn't have many he could rely on or trust.
Where to meet people since sober living was important to his way of life.
After being in a few bad and unhealthy relationships he thought it was easier being alone. He didn't mind being solo and isolated became a regular reoccurrence. Alone with his thought ideas why they didn't happen. How come he never tried or pursued those bubbling creations in the back of his mind.

Always thankful and grateful for everything. Over the same routine stressing to get it done over all the extra. Trying to stay sane become immune to the physical pain. Sleep deprived striving though the long days and slow weeks. Music making things move along.
An outcast rebel going strong doing what they said couldn't be done. Taking pride on the work from the bottom to the top. Saw himself there to be denied. Now he's there again wondering how long this will last.

Walking a tight rope to survive
You look down ready to fall considering all the obstacles
Asking is it worth it
Does it mean anything
Does it even matter
Bad people pretending to be good
While the good ones get treated bad

Family always argues or fights. Some follow the rules while others think it doesn't apply to them. Making a standard while others place bad around you to justify the insanity. Stuck between things that have nothing to do with you.
Lots of arguing and blaming some own up while others blame everyone but themselves. Pride and ego keeping family divided. All these made up rules and boundaries but expect so much from others.
Fighting to be yourself be an individual others don't get you or understand so they try to cancel you out.

They don't respect you but Dk your story. What you've seen and been through. Talking to you like you're waiting for them to tell you how to live your life when they aren't even living the life they set out to live.
Not one to compete or compare with others that aren't doing what one is pursuing on the journey.
Forgiving others even if they are still angry its better to walk away. Being around them as they destroy everything in their path soon it might be you. Hard to trust anyone marking others soon you might become a target.
Being brushed off ignored by everyone gave you room and space to do your own thing working harder and grinding to the fullest

Being called crazy for having a dream only you can see it makes sense in your mind. Having an opinion being different seen as delusional. They aren't helping anyone but themselves why are they talking.
You forgive them and move on because those burdens weigh down your heart. Give yourself peace and closure over holding a grudge. Reading the bible helps fill the empty within. Loving them even if they don't love you back. Staying strong moving through the bad everything will be okay get better. Praying for them because they are set in their ways. Trying to do things with God's way trust the plan. The internal struggle and faith find balance

Its okay to be different what's not okay is for others to impose their view talk about everyone because they didn't get their way. Not being able to get w reaction so they try to turn others against you.
While you remain loyal and the same not giving into those wicked ways. Staying on your standards not lowering yourself to be accepted. Doing what needs to be done not making excuses.
Staying clear of those toxic talkers that never have anything good to say more problems than solutions. They'll blame you because they don't talk to you. Make it seem like you started everything. All because you had an opinion and spoke your mind. It wasn't what they wanted to hear now they made everything personal. All you can do is cut the ties smile be happy on a new journey without those doubters.
Make it about you after years of putting others first while being used and taken for granted. Only you can do it for you. No one else is going to do it for you. Make the most of things and work with what you got.

From the bottom to the top not use to this push. Use to fight to be heard struggle to have a say. All these barriers are gone faded away. Thought one way told to be another. Staying grounded and leveled while others were keeping you down unless you became part of their scam otherwise they wanted nothing to do with you.
Provoked and pushed to hard once you struck back the tone changed. Getting older been doing this getting better trying to overcome being the whipping boy doing others work for years don't need a voice telling you what to do. Especially when you're the one doing all the labor taking on the duties of the unwilling to cooperate.

Everyday being told what to do how to act be free without others trying to cancel one out for having their own goals and dreams doing it your way. Being told NO working for that moment treated it, like it was real, like it was life. Now the moment is here not afraid no backing down.
From crowd being kept out now its open feeling free from all the made up standards hype done pretending limited faded memories.

Writing without cussing is hard not talking about a girl but flirting with the situation playing with hypothetical scenarios all these possibilities that never happen. Asking how could this be avoided or what could've been done differently. Multiple factors but one true outcome that works itself out.
Trying to find inspiration use what's given making the most of everything. Not holding on to everything but letting go a clear mind to ease a pacing mind thinks too much. The heart on an emotional rollercoaster no sure how to feel or react to Everyone everything that's a change from the everyday routine

Older tired trying to make it not get fired. Stay sharp while being yanked in multiple directions. A new boss that appreciates your hard work and efforts. No lead but a new one is being brought over in the process.
Focused on work while others think less of your efforts. Always proving yourself just trying to match energy and be enough for once. Over the obstacles trying to get there even if they are meant to build character shape you.
Asking how much more what else does one have to encounter to find peace and closure wanting more to get lost in it. Not feel like it's over again, how do one get it back dreading starting over. Function without saying now what?

He didn't want to argue or fight with anyone anymore. It doesn't have to be this way not holding a grudge or mad just trying to live and enjoy life.
All the physical and mental pain was enough trying to heal be better. No more childhood pain just moving forward away from the hurt. Not in that place or that person anymore. Cutting away the toxic letting go of those stuck on the past.
Releasing the dead weight since its not helping but holding you down stuck in the same old place. Slow progress is better than staying still.
Recycled thoughts reworded hoping to encourage inspire others. Another way other chances opportunities instead of the same false hope expecting change while working for new onto fresh new perspectives experiences gains from new encounters.

Times are changing from close to disconnected by betrayal not able to trust or rely on anyone. Straight up to your face cold to you behind your back.
Out of respect said it to the persons face its an insult when words circle back around. Can't pretend things are fine when the person violated your trust all the disrespect is unforgivable. Walked away not saying anything the lies playing victim once caught up.

Getting older working with the youth use to being in the back behind the scenes now being brought to the front of the things. He didn't care to battle egos or be caught up in power trips.
The older employees are retiring, it's hard to watch them go. As they grow gray leaving you to move up on with life. Being their replacement feeling the pressure to maintain the high standards.
From a rookie moving to the next level the glass ceiling broke before it was as good or as far as you could go. Always on deck ready to go. There's an open way not sure which way to go.

He loved his family they never talked all they did was talk about one another. Instead of building each other up all the hatred knocking on another.
Everyone goes through stuff but you can't tell people what to do or how to live their life. All you could do is warn them they won't listen choosing the hard way sometimes is the eye opener.
Being the oldest watching your siblings grow set in their ways not telling them anything then quick to judge you for not giving them their way. Trying to destroy you because they didn't get things their way

Tired from work but wide awake so much burden filling the void making the most of everything. The heat is picking up. Hard to relax so much on the mind.
Trying to have a life not just be stuck in a crazy routine. The days blur together. Getting older dealing with the youth learn to be more into detail over fast actions slowing down quality over quantity. Feeling the flow going slow same old thing need to make the most of everything.
In the mirror facing your worse critic no need for friends or enemies on your case. Family giving you hate you knock yourself trying to be great. Millions of things done one mistake feeling like a failure. Give yourself credit no regret for trying. Stress turning your hair white and knots in the stomach.

There was no going back he made an add of himself. She messed around trying to blame him for her actions. He kept a distance because he was hurt mostly angry for trusting all the wrong people.
He didn't always trust people but would find out the hard way. Life goes on she would deny him certain things but go do them with another person. It was the worse feeling he eventually went numb turned off his feelings and emotions. He felt cold by protecting his heart. It made him numb with emotionless ****** expressions and ******* the inside no consideration just doing

A place to show emotions be able to express your feelings without ridicule. Without doubt being able to be free from hate allow yourself to be great. Not have your ego deflated while working on self improvement.
Being told you're nobody by someone that's making no effort. Trying to make you feel like nothing while working hard for everything trying to build while maintaining everything
Find balance dealing with tough scenarios facing complicated people. Not able to please everyone focused on what the heart loves so the mind could stop overthinking

He was blessed and thankful
Sadden his own people opposed him
Against him he was not one of them
He refused to do their corrupt biding
Thankful for the opportunities
A change to finish all those projects
Get them done set new goals
Finally get a win after a dew losses
A clear path after so many obstacles
Overwhelming detours and set backs
Asking what he wanted to do next
What's needed so he could be happy
Putting himself first for once
Years of waiting feeling devalued
Thinking they'd come back start over
False hope for failed ends a redo
Hope of an alternative the outcome
Why can't it happen he asked
Use to things not meant to be
The haunting past fading triumphs
Focused on a promising future
New encounters with personal growth
Prepared for a new promising journey

He felt angry because they lied and tried to dump it on his. He was sick of rules be this way act that way things others never did. He did it or didn't do always getting crap.
The internal conflict was taking it's toll walking the line. Feeling off balance about to topple over everyone talks about each other but never tries to better themselves. Always on the outside looking in once on the inside he wanted out.
He didn't like to disappoint others but they expected too much. Anything he did was never good enough. He did what he loved so many are miserable trying to knock him because they think they'll matter. Making a difference for all the wrong reasons later justifying them as right.

If you need a favor just ask, don't play mind games manipulate others to do the things you won't do. Because you didn't get your way making things personal. That mouth keeps running you'll get caught up since you think your way of imposition is better. When you get stopped in your intrusive tracks don't be surprised.
Another false narrative spun in your favor. Adding lies to your statements to place yourself on another level but it doesn't make you a better person.

Over the censorship others try to replace your values acting like what they know or do is better. Respecting their ways not cancelling mine. Lots of imposition and dysfunction. All the self destruction pretending to be a martyr. Not listening to all these made up ideal to keep others out because they can't fit in. Trying to understand all these foolish demands being forced on the silent majority.

The past ate him up an older man
Full of regret hard to forget things
Worlds collide their bad fell on his lap
Never meant to hurt them as well
Pursing a dream detoured goal
Destroying himself after failed efforts
Rejected by love replaced with hate
Not letting it infect his heart
Denying the wrong others shadow
Focused on right not argue or fight

Some people could live a double life
He struggled with living one
Working on self improvement
Personal growth eyes wide open
Seeing straight no more distractions
Rising above the hate not grounded
Too many detours fighting to make it
All the heartbreaking set backs
After all the years of doing the job
Now it's official seen as the real thing
Not being taken seeing as a joke
Things got serious very intense
No one is playing anymore

There was no going back
Had to come up with something
Did everything possible came up short
Ran out of moves stuck moving still
Part of the progress getting better
Not one to settle for less sharp focus
Trying not to obsess on the wrong
Still working for it doing what's right
Not about crowds a true rebel
Everyone out for their own

He stared at himself in the mirror
So much internal conflict within
Trying to walk with God stay clear of drama
Keep a clean head on his shoulder
Grew up hood not a punk down for his
Trying to be better turning away
The gesture is mistaken for running
Minding his mouth keeping the peace
Cold honesty his words became **** shots
A stone look that seeks the truth
Restrain his emotions no weakness
Numb feelings not one to mess with

Love for family always
Not giving up on myself
Death brings everyone together
Doing your own thing not mad
Someone is still holding a grudge
Making things personal over opinions
Everyone is impersonal with another
Can't pick when to be involved
All or nothing trying to be some body
Family quick to remind you the past
In the struggle seen as no body
Not mad just proving them wrong
A good head on your shoulders
Doing what's right focused on being better
When no one believes

Told to act a certain way
How to behave no way
No love for my parents by you
Now you're coming at me
Let me be one day you'll see
All you do is talk two faced snakes
Putting those labels on others
Projecting negativity why bothers
Changing up the narrative
Trying to use others to get your way
Walked away free where I'm accepted
So much neglect disrespected

Benji hated walking on egg shells. He couldn't say anything but people tried to tell him everything when no one asked. Lots of projection and imposition from others; making it easy for him to be alone.
Everyone was so miserable and sad all he wanted was to be happy. So many drained him of his good vibes. Feeling robbed and cheating himself because he couldn't say anything or have an opinion without everything becoming a personal attack.
He would write in his journal which gave him a voice. He didn't like to argue or go against his family and friends. Becoming a road block he knew they wouldn't like it and he didn't want to do it.
Lots of conflict of interest would cause this friendship to crumble. Feuding with family is the worse not backing down or running standing your ground up for yourself. No terms or compromise only conditions that divide more problems than solutions.

Growing up learning on your own not being told you're good but everyone quick to point out everything you did wrong. Learned by watching getting in there not afraid to try lots of failure before succeeding.
Being taunted and mocked worked harder than everyone to stand out know for hard work didn't talk get involved work politics. Never one to **** up but work till it became natural did it right.
Achieved those old finally setting new ones still working to pursue the dream. Building up for the next level onto a new life a new chapter.

Setting new goals no going back to what tried to break rose above the ones who said it couldn't be done. Called delusional for not settling for less. Had an opinion now treated like an outcast.
Never one of them not trying to force it anymore. Let them go got burned too many times before. Use to being alone found comfort in it. Uncomfortable pretend people, who did wrong would some day see him as an equal. Ignored most of the time only considered when a favor is need half the time not even in the conversation. In the background watching the reign of terror going strong
Faded out no longer empowering the chaos or fighting for a spot since they are quick to push you out. Walked away from the disrespect all the lies. Always told the truth while the lies are accepted used to manipulate others. Not falling for the scam or sticking around had to learn the hard way finally moving on

He walked away from all the double standards tired of being talked about. Never said anything bad just had an opinion. Being told how to act and who to be didn't work.
Trying to be himself among a bunch of phonies. Working to move up so many road blocks and detours on the way. He didn't let others influence his action.
They couldn't dictate his fate leaving the world behind walking with faith. Praying for others for strength not always sure but motivated to do what was right. Pursuing a dream and setting new goals without giving up himself to be liked to be accepted.

No one takes pride in your work they are quick to snitch you out throw you under. Not falling for the bait or putting up with the hate. Team work to get it done usually one sided the truth is everyone bitter divided going to write about it.
Hard to remember so much that needs to be done have some fun and write it all down a check list racing time feeling calm after making it half way through.

Already stressed from over thinking
My worse critic harder on myself
Do not like being put in the hot seat
Got to get it done in a timely manner
Stop being the x factor with burdens
Mocking workers adding to things
Was a pleasure working with you
Letting go going strong just started
Sad to see you go but enjoy life
Live make the most of retirement
Still got years to go barely started
Trying to stand alone and have grown
Not staying at the bottom forever
Moving up in ranks no one wants it
Not a leader but being an example
Helping the team doing my part
Being an example doing extra

Walking away was hard but got easier because he had to fight for his spot. Why stay if they had plans to replace him. Being pushed out the welcome feeling was gone.
Tired of compromising himself to fit in and being what others said when he didn't say anything or do anything to give them a reason to talk. He was supportive but when he needed them they were no where to be found.
He would vent but their problems always seemed to be more important than how he felt and what he thought.
He use to give advice try to help he was resourceful never telling people the truth not what they wanted to her.
Most did the opposite or whatever they wanted so he stopped

He looked at his hairy belly trying to remember his youth days where his body contained more muscle with had tons of energy.
Trying to feel more secure and confident about his appearance since he was single for too long but knew he didn't need anyone to make him happy. He would have to do that himself.
Working hard and thankful since he remembered what a tough time he had when he wasn't working his **** off. It wasn't right or the same anymore trying to go forward and not back.

Ben was thinking about dating after being in a crazy relationship the trauma kept him from diving head first into a new relations. A one night stand that turned into a year and a month relationship.
He was happy to be in a relationship but she was never happy ruining things because she wasn't happy. He tried but it wasn't good enough. After failed attempts to end it. she would mustard up the courage to end it so she could be superior having the upper hand.
Years later she would have 2 children with the guy she cheated on him with and tried to blame him for her actions. He was crushed hurt never going back telling himself to be better not settle for less give up part of himself to be liked to be accepted.

Chuck enjoyed his birthday breakfast with grandma and his sister plus her bf. They would enjoy his meal and the waitresses would bring him a dessert and sing him happy birthday.
He didn't like being the center of attention it made him uncomfortable for some strange reason. He got use to being an outcast in the back; who kept to himself minding his mouth mostly his business.
He went to a collectible store to buy vintage toys to him was his childhood being resold over priced. He got an anime series for a reasonable price.
After hanging with his siblings his friend would tell him lets meet up for beer and pizza. He agreed he didn't have beer but did enjoy the pizza and watching the ball game. Staying sober in the bar was hard but made the most of it. He use to be social but felt like it was one sided.
His first time out in a while was different he was quiet but everyone would talk to him for some strange reason it was all new and different from how he remembers things.

Been wide awake not able to sleep
Deep down an unsettle feeling
Trying to balance things out
Feels like everything might crumble
Fall apart before these tired eyes
A sore body from pushing through
Trying to beat the clock going strong
Dealing with a lazy leads ego
It's just talking blocking it out
Some will never change their mind
Not expecting much moving forward
Set in their stubborn ways one way
With distance resentment fades away
Time to heals over being stuck waiting
From the old embrace new moving on

On the road, After a few set backs rise above the stress; trying to have a life outside of work. A hopeless romantic trying to find true love. Easily bored with all the wrong women sharing time to have it wasted thinking it was something amounting to nothing. Pushing through the chaos fading out of the scene starting over once again.
Avoiding hurt working extra hours distracted from emotions.
Lost in stress focused on improving not the first or last time being in charge. From the the youngest to feeling middle age ready to embrace the change. Everything falls into place over the years. Things don't happen right away thankful it worked itself out eventually.

He didn't like the idea of being someone others made him out to be. The talk bothered him since no one was talking about the people that opened there mouth.
Focused on work but considering a career change since it wasn't fun he didn't enjoy himself anymore. Years of being on the back burner and burnt out. Till this day he still doesn't believe he's fulltime permanent.
Not looking back wishing he could of done things different asking why it didn't happen right away when he finally had it wondering was it worth it.

He loved his kiddos but didn't get along with their parents. All they do is talk about everyone. No one asks or cares what they think but they run their mouth. Fading away from all the forced interaction don't care to associate anymore.
All the disrespect trying to talk about your life they know nothing about with false narratives that they project. Fading away no longer connected but they'll try to blame you. When they started the drama not part of them or one of them anymore learned to be okay with that.
Being talked over and false assumptions is not the way to treat anyone. Not listening so they try to turn everyone against you. It did hurt at the beginning now immune to all the crazy. They do their own thing you respect it but once you do your own thing they impose not interested and don't care anymore. Had to find more positive people to grow and be myself arounf.

He didn't know, how to make the wrong right. He said sorry it wasn't enough. After being excluded and kept out; there was no going back. Trying to make it better things declined and got worse.
Trying to talk it out things got sour fast. From friends to foes; now strangers that no longer talk; while growing apart living divided lives

Family don't define your life
All that talking tired of listening
They do worse curse your name
A future without support
Trying to survive staying alive
Not losing hope or faith
Haven't been able to sleep
These past couple of days
Hate being a lead taking the heat
Responsible for others actions
Failing to produce frustration
Staying up late so much anger
A heart that refuses to hate
Seeing my grandpas car ruined
By a druggie with no future
A bad father pretending to care
Showed them love quick to blame
Throw me under for their faults
Staying away not getting involved
**** all the talk no one does anything
Two faced people see through the scam
Don't care to be around anymore
Only when they need something

He was tired of all these rules and demands to be accepted they wanted him to change but they did nothing to change. He preferred to be alone but they called him a rebel since they thought isolating him would be a punishment.
He was use to being alone and didnt care to be corrected for having an opinion. Being told how to act was annoying he was responsible for himself. They tried to modify him when they did worse acting like their way was the best way.
He chose to be a man of God trusting his way on God time and plan. He struggled because minding his mouth was hard since everyone kept coming at him. He minded his business while everyone kept talking when they shouldn't even be saying anything.
A bunch of nobodies talking like they are somebody. Instead of owing up quick to pass the blame.