He kept pushing through now he was alone. Waiting and walking among peers felt like he was missing out or could be doing more. Not going up on his individualism refused to be another face in a crowd.
He felt things that had become so distant. Friends and social interaction wasn't the same it seemed better this time around. He usually went to work and home to sleep.
He'd work hard writing while listening to podcast. Faded out of all the family drama. He was free no kids or relationship to limit him. He did try to take on family values but too many rules are made that keep him out feeling excluded in a room among loved ones.

He sat at the bar with a buzz chilling with his cousin. He admired the bartender her beauty young hot body blonde. He enjoyed the night a colleague from work would swing by for a drink. Enjoying pizza and great company. He was older wondering if he still had it.
His coworkers envied him because he has hair and single. While he wanted to be in a relationship with kids. He lived a lonely life and made the most of things. He had been a wild one but it got old dull most of all boring.

He was so use to the same old crap being ignored and kept out. Once he went into the world people found him interesting and talked to him. It was all new and different. Stuck in a routine only working and sleep the world seemed so young and fresh while he was was older feeling dull.
Missing his youth because the new generations filled in those empty slots. While his peers had kids got married or just working a mind numbing job that occupied their time.
Feeling hidden from the world trying to stay in control even though things are out of control for the most of the time. Broken from the past feeling healed like a whole in the present moment. The transition was very complicated always starting over with relationships or friendships learning to not get attached since people are usually just passing through.

He looked at pix of old friends wondering how they are he missed them. Some were busy with families others wanted nothing to do with him. He made mistakes and stayed away he was sorry but would never be treated the same or seen an equal.
He could only lower himself for so long tired of lowering himself feeling degraded for forgiveness. Things would never change or be the same so he had to cut the cord and move on. They weren't saving his place but pushing him out. It was tough learned the hard way there was no going back. He was human tired of everyone trying to make him out to be a crazy person since he had an opinion and spoke his mind.

Wide awake thinking about the day what's next? Staying clear of drama things that hurt him or made him mad. He didn't feed into toxic vibes or empower negative idiots.
He sat in his room writing thinking about the plan before jumping into action. Having an idea instead of assuming the outcome usually trying to make it through the day.
Dating is fun but he was private everyone tried to tell him how to live and who to be he didn't like that. Mean while dealing the younger generation trying to tell him when he had done way more. Everyone was quick to judge he didn't say or do anything to anyone.
He gave relationship advice to help but he was single. Gave parent advice for the kids best interest but the parent only card about feeding those bad habits. He meant well positive intensions while they tried to throw him under making him the scapegoat.

He was learning the mechanics of the clench hand placement on the elbow and collar. Even cupping the back of the neck so that he could have control while throwing knees.
Going through the drill dishing out working on form. While takin the punishment on a higher tempo while taking knee strikes.
Learning more and more adding to his arsenal. He enjoyed training MMA so much to work on kicks and punches take downs, also ground game that he worked on.

He was in a relationship and his female companion decided to confess her feelings for him. She made him feel awkward putting him in a situation he wanted but not at the current moment. He had feelings for her but he would remain loyal to his gf.
Why did they admit; how they felt, after he messed up, but he never knew he had a chance with her. He was a good friend didn't let his feelings get the best of him. He never acted on those emotions because he didn't like feeling vunerable or being used most of all being taken for granted.