He didn't like the idea of being someone others made him out to be. The talk bothered him since no one was talking about the people that opened there mouth.
Focused on work but considering a career change since it wasn't fun he didn't enjoy himself anymore. Years of being on the back burner and burnt out. Till this day he still doesn't believe he's fulltime permanent.
Not looking back wishing he could of done things different asking why it didn't happen right away when he finally had it wondering was it worth it.

He loved his kiddos but didn't get along with their parents. All they do is talk about everyone. No one asks or cares what they think but they run their mouth. Fading away from all the forced interaction don't care to associate anymore.
All the disrespect trying to talk about your life they know nothing about with false narratives that they project. Fading away no longer connected but they'll try to blame you. When they started the drama not part of them or one of them anymore learned to be okay with that.
Being talked over and false assumptions is not the way to treat anyone. Not listening so they try to turn everyone against you. It did hurt at the beginning now immune to all the crazy. They do their own thing you respect it but once you do your own thing they impose not interested and don't care anymore. Had to find more positive people to grow and be myself arounf.

He didn't know, how to make the wrong right. He said sorry it wasn't enough. After being excluded and kept out; there was no going back. Trying to make it better things declined and got worse.
Trying to talk it out things got sour fast. From friends to foes; now strangers that no longer talk; while growing apart living divided lives

Family don't define your life
All that talking tired of listening
They do worse curse your name
A future without support
Trying to survive staying alive
Not losing hope or faith
Haven't been able to sleep
These past couple of days
Hate being a lead taking the heat
Responsible for others actions
Failing to produce frustration
Staying up late so much anger
A heart that refuses to hate
Seeing my grandpas car ruined
By a druggie with no future
A bad father pretending to care
Showed them love quick to blame
Throw me under for their faults
Staying away not getting involved
**** all the talk no one does anything
Two faced people see through the scam
Don't care to be around anymore
Only when they need something

He was tired of all these rules and demands to be accepted they wanted him to change but they did nothing to change. He preferred to be alone but they called him a rebel since they thought isolating him would be a punishment.
He was use to being alone and didnt care to be corrected for having an opinion. Being told how to act was annoying he was responsible for himself. They tried to modify him when they did worse acting like their way was the best way.
He chose to be a man of God trusting his way on God time and plan. He struggled because minding his mouth was hard since everyone kept coming at him. He minded his business while everyone kept talking when they shouldn't even be saying anything.
A bunch of nobodies talking like they are somebody. Instead of owing up quick to pass the blame.

The look of anger and frustration became a common thing now a days. He asked them to not do something they did it anyway. He wasn't trying to pull rank but looked out.
Not his place to say but did want to be fair even though some think the rules don't apply to them. They didn't listen and they expect him to give in their ways and support their bad habits.
He loved to drink but didn't want to hear about bad relationships. It turned into pounding and chugging he just wanted a buzz.
He didn't care for the crowd even though it was family lots of talk and nothing got done. He was doing because wanted it most of trying to get it done and done right.

Writing has been therapy clearing the mind of extra stress being able to vent without others twisting your words. Always taking in the bad while focusing on the good. Its therapeutic while listening to metal music the drums and fast pace tempo is so comforting.
Using colored pens to fill each page writing for closure to let go of the things that don't matter trying to stay sharp more focused composed on things that will help better the situation. Fell off trying to get back on track.