Was never normal
Will things ever be normal again
Whatever that means
Go without a mask
Be able to be in a large group
See friends with out fear
Be around family without
Thinking police will break up a gathering
Be able to attend a sporting event
Enjoy an amusement park on a hot day
Eat in a restaurant get out of the house
Thankful for this home
Anxiety from being inside
Before it would occur every so often
Being out in the work routine
Been reading to past time
Praying for everything to be okay
Writing to stay sane maintain the craft
These thoughts like wild river rafting
One helluva ride all in one mind
Laying in bed hoping to sleep
Wide awake hoping to get some shut eye
Money was flowing now it's slowing
Waiting for the day to be able to go back

Grew up hood
Means be down for yours
So many talk hard
But don't back it up
Never cared to drink
Always speak up sober
Say what you think
Mean what you say
All the instigating
Hiding in the back
So much hating
For being different

Always looking for love
Find support being creative
Someone in a bad mood
Keeping a distance that's not good
Some days talking it up
Others an intense silence
Not trying to pry or intrude
Wondering what's wrong or going on
Would rather ask than assume
Everyone faces obstacles to overcome
Dealing with a struggle you're not alone
Sometimes the support is there
Just know I care even when things seem unfair

Disappointed nothing new
Over the crew rolling solo
Went hard the first time
Working harder the second round
Prefer loyal underground
Over the fake mainstream
Smaller venue more intimate
Big crowds big payday
Doesn't matter the moment on stage
All the rage short lived
Worked to get in not staying out
Working to stay like rent its due

Grasping the moment
Regretting its over
Put in some time
Saying good bye
The past is history
Life going forward a mystery
So much curiosity floating
Taken away by it all
Can't fall a sleep
Calling your name
After math all that remains

Waking up next to this stranger
The girl I love blinded in danger
Thought this was love
Turned out to be lust
Another argument then ***
More conflicts that can't be fixed
More pain the thought of her name
Really in too deep can't be saved
Walking away is hard had to be brave
The last time together forgotten
Remember the first day we met
Hard to forget it was special
Now full of regret lost the vibe
Had to say goodbye to survive

Sleep all day
Up all night
So many ideas
Love to write
Wild imagination
On the go
Tried to draw
Mind goes blank
Staring at a plain page
Can't sleep begin to pray
Things would be normal
Talking to myself to fall a sleep
Use to pretend love was near
Heard a noise feeling fear
Day or night room feels the same
Would shed a tear show emotion
Able to escape this loneliness
Pride protecting the heart
Mind overwhelmed missing others
Thought of calling not answer
The phone works two ways
Sent a text no response
Wondering if all is well or okay
So many ways to communicate
Yet no one can connect
Begged for forgiveness
Never going to be forgiven
Things are not the same
Had to stay away to avoid the pain
A one time mistake not a life sentence
Sober and clean doesn't mean anything
Did it to help our friendship
Now doing it to be better find strength
Move away to heal gave up on a dream
Starting over finding another path another way