Those lips of
Yours
Call my name;
I just wish I could
Hear.

The sound of your
Voice
Is soothing
But it's just
Something I seem to
Fear.

What happened to us?
And please tell me why.
Since when was it okay to just let people cry,
While they smile on the outside,
And utter mere lies.
We're all so broken,
But yet, we're 'fine.'

Happiness
does not come to those who
wait for it
to come their way.

Happiness
comes to those who
work for
and actively
seek it out.

You
choose the direction
your life
takes.

clouds gather kissing
crying to the earth below
my head feels so loved

The music listens to me
not the reverse

I dance to my own tune
swaying to my own beat

I am my own little drummer woman
creating a tune of my own

I sing my own harmony
weaving through others' melody

I paint my photograph
using no light or dark or color at all

I do my own thing
being me my whole time.

it takes two seconds
of chit chat
for me to get down
to why i am so angry
with you.
how could you leave me
all summer,
sister.
all the **** that we've been through
these two years...
isn't my family
divided
separated
scattered
enough?
everyone leaves.
it's easier
to just
leave
i want to leave...
but i must be the one that stays
because no one else will.
don't yell at me
for not applying to colleges
for sitting
staring
at the ceiling
slicing
my arms open
not eating
passing out
hitting my head
screaming
don't yell at me
for things you don't understand,
sister.
maybe
if i was better
if i was happier
nicer
...better...
you would want to stay here
with me.
but i guess i messed it up
just like i messed up with mom
i thought i was so good at
giving people
what they want
i never know what i want...
maybe that's the problem

it is so much easier
to sit here
and pretend
i am the erratic
pattern
on this chair
rather than be
the weird
cat-eared
gingerbread cookie
that i am.

Seeing the ocean for the first time
Seeing it for the hundredth
Seeing it again and again but

Being numb like this
Being alone for the thousandth night

Feeling vaporous as oxygen
Feeling weary when

Seeing the ocean