I know,
I'm weird.
Just pretend it's normal.
Okay?
You pretty much agreed to this,
The moment you said,
"I love you."
You have to agree with me when I say something like,
"Noses have no purpose."
Then explode from realization when I finally figure out that noses are used for smelling...
You just need to agree with me when I start singing along to k-pop,
Don't judje when I suddenly yell,
"I AM A GOOD BOY."
Just don't even ask if I'm okay,
You should know by now,
I'm really not...

You opened up my heart,
One of the things I kept hidden for such a long time.
But then you came along,
Took my hand,
Squeezed gently,
I knew you were meant for me...
I knew that you understood.

You took my heart in your hands,
You made sure nothing you did ever hurt me.
You looked into my eyes,
You wipes away my tears,
And you talked to me.
Talking...
You're words...
They make me so happy.
They make me want to stay with you forever.
They make me want to hold you forever.
And I will...
Till death do us part...

:)

Are you sure?
Are you lying?
It's nothing against you,
I swear.
I just hurt.
Everywhere,
Everyday,
Every minute.
Every heart beat hurts me.

I have my doubts,
I'm sorry about that.
But
I've had more than my fair share of lies,
Deception,
Mind games.
I just can't help but wonder...
Do you REALLY care?
Or am I another woman to you?
Another person to take advantage of?
Do I really matter to you?
Or am I something for you to use,
For your own pleasure,
Then leave me wounded?

I have my doubts,
Sorry about that...

I'm a grenade,
Ticking...ticking...ticking.
I hunger for the love that people get on a daily basis,
But once I'm close,
I loose it all...
I don't want to hurt anyone else,
Please,
You have to understand.
I love you dearly,
But I'm afraid to hurt you.

If you love me,
I need you to understand,
You're seeing all my scars.
You have to understand how sad I am,
All
The
Time.
You have to understand,
I come with baggage.
Lots and lots,
of baggage.
You have to understand,
When I say,
"I love you",
I mean,
"Thanks for not  leaving me."
I mean,
"Thanks for being there."
And of course,
"I will always be there for you."

Swooping into mind,
Like crows,
Swarming the skies.
Blocking out all evidence or sunlight.
Their flat, cold eyes,
Making sure you know they’re there.

Close your eyes,
Forget it.
Concentrate on something else.
But you feel the eyes staring into you.
Burning into your skin,
Forever branding you.
You can’t shake the sinking feeling of it all,
You can’t ever escape the feeling.

You walk throughout the day,
Sinking slower and slower,
Until you reach the bottom.
You fall under it all.
Looking up,
Seeing all the people above you.
“Why can’t I be like them…?”
You lay down,
Letting the tears fall.
Caring not what anyone else thinks,
Letting it all unfurl.
All your feelings…
Out in the open.

This is what it’s like,
Living with depression...

Save your breath,
It’ll all end soon.
Don’t make it any worse than it already is.
Don’t fight back,
They’ll leave you alone, I promise…
I know it hurts,
But it’ll pass.
I promise…

Please,
Don’t cry.
Dearest,
Don’t cry.
Get up off the floor.
Brush the dirt off your knees,
Wipe the tears from your eyes,
Clean the blood off your wounds.
I’ll all be okay…
I promise…

Dearest,
I know it hurts now…
But it’ll be okay…
I promise.

I’m sorry my dearest.
I love you,
I promise…

A secret escape to paradise.
No more fighting,
No more pain.
No more empty words.
Alone with my thoughts and voice.

Holding my heart in my hands,
Stitching together rips,
Gluing cracks together.
Maybe this time I won’t fall apart so easily.

My little paradise,
Where nobody can fill it with negativity.
Where nobody can hurt me…
I am happy here.
In the dark,
Alone with my thoughts and voice.