I have tasted wine before
I would be lying if I said none tasted as good as your lips
Alot tasted better
However you know I am but a cynical fool
One that sees the darkness long before it thinks to approach
And yet you still hold my hand, in the hopes I will declare to you something poetic, something none have declared to you before
But I fear I am too ***** for such a deed
The pure part of me that could produce such romanticism has long be poisoned
And has since died
So I would be selfish if I asksd you to wait
I will not
For even my evil only goes so far

True to the words I speak
True to the experiences I have lived
True to the hands I have held
And the faces I have met
Both the ones frozen in time and the ones that held motion
I know to it all a dream that will never be forgotten
A dream I could not make up on my own

Upon the threshold I stand
Looking down at my life
I can not tell if the tears are for a life so well lived that it is beyond any sadness to leave it behind
Or if the tears are because I realise my life was built only on sadness that no other can know

If one is never fully dressed without a smile
Then I must be naked all the time

A day of wonder
Is a day I do not know
A day I have not been able to explore
Yet instead I discover the blood within lungs
preventing me from breathing
I cannot analyse the faces before me
The smiles
The happiness
I often wonder if that shall ever be applicable to me
If the sun will ever gift my skin with the shine it bestows upon others
They testify that I hallucinate
that none of my worries belong in reality
none of them are worth existing