There is no authenticity in their love,
I suppose in a way they grew up never knowing what love really was,
Then having children and allowing them to grow up,
In the same way that they did,
But only in a different time,
Different generation,
Same frame of mind,
Love, you never knew her.
Neither did I,
Used to cry myself asleep and awake at night,
Never knowing what it felt like,
To have that warm feeling resonate inside,
Inside me,
Burning like a flame,
A love so strong to the point that I never grew cold,
You never knew it,
Therefore neither did I,
You deprived me of what you never had,
You say you're nothing like her,
But your just another copy,
Just as stubborn,
Hypercritical and mean,
You are her.
Just another carbon copy.

She's the type of girl that you overlook,
Book smart ain't obsessed about her looks,
Personality with the depth of the sea,
Heart so big I'm talkin' bout the universe you see,
It's this girl that you ignore,
That you actually really should adore,
But you find her a bore,
Rather settle for a ****,
But you ain't worried about all that,
Trying to see if she can swallow that all back,
Can she take it from the back and make that *** clap,
Does she got them double D's,
Can she ride on the D,
Is her precious P really as tight as it seems,
You looking for that one night and that's alright,
But this girl deserves your whole life,
She ain't looking to be used and abused,
She ain't looking to be taken for a fool,
So I suggest you come back when the time's right,
Get your mind right,
Cause she ain't that girl from last night,
She's a diamond in the rough,
In a couple years you'll be thinking that she's buff,
Rare...
But so unaware,
She busy thinking that nobody knows that she's there,
Feeling like a backdrop,
Thinking she got bad luck,
She ain't that girl you called a "bad one",
She's the unappreciated forever,
Compared to those wasted couple months.

I saw something in her that I believed they should have stamped out,
Left her be and now she acts out,
Continues to rebel,
Always playing the fool,
Yet she remains unscathed,
Disrespectful and quick at the tongue,
Stupid...
Stereotypically others would call her blonde,
She's an imp,
I always knew it,
Saw the evil in her when she was 5,
Not a very nice thing to say I know,
But would you rather hear a lie?
They let her get away with ******,
But never let me step a foot out of line,
She was a messenger from down below,
But they still loved her.
Why?
I was better yet they treated me worse..
Why?
The others are too young,
Yet I still believe they will shine,
I see it in their eyes,
Even though sometimes I'm not so sure,
They're better than her,
The loud mouthed ****.
We may be blood..
Regardless of every fibre in my body, crying out that it couldn't possibly be true,
She was placed on a pedastool.
All my life I have been painted the villian,
When I finally break,
It will be bone chilling.

Why do we pretend,
To care for one another,
What do you have to prove?
I would respect you more,
If you dropped this ruse,
You become so infuriated when I tell the truth,
Anger taking over you,
It must **** you inside to face your mistakes,
You play the perfect mother,
Claiming there can never be another,
To take your place.
Arrogant you are,
Oh so arrogant,
Only for the hell of it,
You are not who you claim to be.
Look at me.
I am a broken child.
Descending into adulthood,
All the while never knowing why,
You always favoured them,
Why not me instead,
The least you could do is share the affection,
Treated them as a blessing,
While I was the cancerous infection.

I crave affection.
Not the mediocre type of love that I'm used to witnessing,
I crave something deeper.
Something so vast it knows no limits,
I have a lot of love to give,
I know I may not show it,
But I do.
I crave something more than the physical,
Venturing closer to the intellectual side of things,
Moving more towards the heart,
Emotional.
Descending  closer to the soul,
Spiritual.
I crave the hand that feels for more than my breast,
His eyes that shows me he wants more than a kiss,
I crave something deeper.
Its come to the point where it is my addiction,
Looking for someone that matches my depiction,
A person I can love,
Who loves me back just as much,
No not a soul mate.
Just someone I can learn and grow with,
Vice versa, we'll switch it up.
A person I can trust,
Love knows no bounds and hopefully neither will us.

When you get your hopes up,
Thinking this time that things might actually change,
Trying to keep your mind in a positive frame,
It may not be picture perfect but you try just the same,
To believe in something in a positive way,
But that voice in the back of your head knows better,
It remembers your pain,
Whispering ever so softly,
"Some things never change."

I pray the lord my soul to keep if I were to end up under a white sheet, hoping I don't get shot, pull out the glock, killing my people off because our melanin pops. Brothers and sisters banding together seems to shake you to your very core; terrified that we could be so much more; positive role models, with our beautiful excess pigmentation. We don't fit into your back drop; your white frame, we thought we had changed the game, escaped the chains but everything remains the same. Now we remain target practice for your racist game, you are drunk with power now, believing you are in control, ignorance is bless; but our indignation is the fist that will knock you out of your ignorant bless. I'm not saying they're all bad but the violence has to stop. #blacklivesmatter