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harlee kae Oct 2014
why
why do i sit in this parking lot crying
while the birds are outside flapping their wings
why wasnt i made for this life like everyone else seems to be
and why am i so alone
why am i always alone
and why wont the sadness stop
why did you touch me
why did you touch my body
why did you touch my mind
why did you touch my soul
and why did you leave
why wasnt i enough
why am i so **** useless
why am i here
why am i still alive when this doesnt feel like living
why cant i sleep anymore
and why does eating make me sick
why do i try so hard to fill others with love, when i cant even love myself
tell me why
harlee kae Sep 2014
fyi
i never realized how much i depended on you until you disappeared.
harlee kae Sep 2014
some days i convince myself that i'm completely fine. and others all i do is stare into space thinking fuckfuckfuck and trying not to cry.
some nights i fall asleep peacefully as soon as my head hits the pillow. and others i can't force my eyes to shut for the tears streaming out.
sometimes i tell myself i dont need you at all. others i tell myself the truth.
harlee kae Sep 2014
because my biggest hope
and my biggest fear
is that you'll come back.
harlee kae Sep 2014
When I no longer felt the need to live they told me there was a way;
they would cut up my body, sale all the pieces, and that way, I could stay..

They stuck me inside a crane machine,
my arms, my legs, my heart.
Fifty cents was all it took to win yourself a part.

My head it was the first to go, it went to a strange old man.
Who lived down in a basement, and had a secret plan.

My fingers they went next, to some little girls and boys.
The size of them was perfect for the children to use as toys.

Eventually my brain and my heart were the last items in the case.
An eager young girl ran up and pressed the glass against her face.

She asked her mother curiously, which one should I choose.
Her mother replied, think carefully, for neither I'd want to lose.

The heart can bring you so much joy, but also so much pain.
And the brain can give you answers, but also drive you insane.

The little girl walked away, slowly shaking her head.
I like them both too much to pick just one of them she said.
Then she grabbed herself a chocolate bar and said I'll take this instead.
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