Boy 1:
I told you not to kiss me, I told you to stay away from me. I told you I hated you, but you always sat behind me on the bus, you lived down the street from where I lived, you always stopped by to ask if I could come outside and play.
We were so young, we didn't even know how to spell love just yet, we had finger painting, and fishy crackers.
We were so young, but the words "I like when you can't say your words all the way." Still made my heart speed but I swore up and down if you kissed me I'd punch your lights out.
Needless to say you walked home with a ****** nose.

Boy 2:
The first pair of eyes I fell in love with, the way they shined when you talked about your future  and how proud you were going to be when you stepped onto the battle field.
Your eyes still shined when the words "you're beautiful." We're whispered into my ear as I drifted into sleep.
The words got stronger and stronger throughout the months are us endless talking about leaving this town.
Soon sweet words burned at the back of our throats, we fought and fought. Till I had nothing left in me.
I walked away with nothing but
"Don't ever forget how much I love you." Fresh on my to lips,
The only thing fresh on your lips was "*******. You ruined my life."

Boy 3:
You proved to me that it doesn't take a healed heart to break, you can easily break a broken one just as easy,
You spit words like
"Hold me."
"Never leave me."
"I'm scared to not have you in my life."
"I can fix you baby."
"You'll always be my baby, always and forever."
"I think I'm in love with you, Jk I know I am."
"Run away with me?"
These words weren't just mine but hers too. The sweetest things were just pick up lines, she stole your heart that summer night.
You got scared and called my phone:
"I want this summer to be different.. Bye forever."
You picked her over me, you left me.
I picked you. You didn't pick me.
You left me broken and alone with no one to hold.
I was nothing.
Boy 4:
We spent days talking about poetry and art, how many kids we wanted, how many times our hearts have been broken, I told you I've been sad for along time, that I was scared at night. You'd call and listen to ramble on and on about my life, you would read me your poems every night till I fell sleep. You would write 4 pages of things you would do to me if we were alone for 20 minutes tops.
You tried so hard, but I wasn't ever healed from 2 summers ago when my blue eyed boy told me I ruined his life,
I wasn't healed.
I cut you off, I didn't talk to you for weeks. Until I texted you telling to come watch movies with me and my Bestfriend.
You laid beside me and told me things I never knew, told me how cute I looked with my messy hair, told me my eyes shined when I repeated a saying from the movie, he giggled when I kissed your eye lids and told you; you were something so shiny and new.
I do what I always do and walked away. I pushed you out of my life and forgot how your heart felt beating against my hand.
Boy 5;
You were late night car rides and early  morning kisses.
You were big blue eyes and smokey clothes.
You were the extreme high, I craved you every day of the week.
I was weak in the knees as I climbed in your lap and kissed your neck.
I was smiles and giggles at your jokes,
I was in love with you when you shattered my heart for a 15 year old who bangs soon to be daddy's and prays on others feelings.
I loved you.
Boy 6:
Stay forever?
You can keep me in mind,
You have a way of making ***** words sounds so pure and right,
You promise to fix his mistakes and you say you want forever.
You talk about our life's together and how happy you'll make me.
So here you are stitching my life back to together with shaky hands.
Here you are loving someone who's drained by blue eyes and lies.
Fill me back with life?

Every night,
I lay my head down on my pillow.
And I think of every good moment I've ever had with you.
Like the time you drove me home and I asked why you didn't kiss me.
You scratched your head and said, "Do you want me to?"
I said of course, but you didn't.
The time during the fall when you let me drive your car. You kept your hand close to my leg, just in case. You told me pointers. You kept smiling at me with those big brown eyes.
The first time I seen you after our first big fight.
You ran your fingers through my hair and for the first time, admitted that you missed me.
When I crawled over the console and laid on you.
You spoke softly, "I don't know how you make this comfortable, but you do."
That same night, was the first time you kissed me in public.
You smiled and rubbed your nose on mine.
The night when I rubbed your back for hours, while we got to know each other.
The way I used to watch your eyes as they followed the road when we walked down it. Or the way your hands tensed up when we drove around curves.
The lines that appear around your mouth every time you smile.
My favorite night was when you woke me up from a nightmare and said , "I'm here. I didn't leave." And held me.
The same morning, I woke up. The first time you'd seen me without make up and my hair a mess.
You said,
"Good morning, beautiful."
I smiled and hugged you.

Your memories are my favorite.

When a boy who leaves goosebumps on every inch of your skin tries to play you his favorite song, don't let him. He'll get stuck in your head and under your fingertips and when he leaves, you won't be able to it without feeling like you're choking.
2. Don't let him touch you all over no matter how much you want to feel him against you. Leave a few spots untouched so that when you're sleeping alone again, at least your left wrist and an inch of your right hip won't sting with the remaining burn of his mouth.
3. Don't let him break your ribs.
4. Don't watch the sunset with him. He'll poison it. You won't be able to look at the sky without swallowing a mouthful of him.
5. Don't mistake wasps for butterflies. Sometimes when you feel your stomach flutter and your hands start to shake, it's pain. Not love.
6. Just because he tells you he loves you doesn't mean he's going to stay, baby.
7. It's okay to delete his number after he kisses the pretty girl he met when he was drunk. It's okay to leave when he hurts you. You don't have to keep falling for him.
8. When he tells you that you're beautiful, try to remember that you were beautiful before him, too.
9. Just because he reads and smokes cigarettes and talks about stars doesn't mean he's your soulmate.
10. After you kiss him, remember to wash your mouth out right away so he doesn't burn into your tongue.
11. He'll kiss you in the rain and take you to little coffee shops He'll brush your hair out of your eyes and kiss your nose. He'll grab your waist and whisper in your ear but six months later you'll find yourself drunk texting him that you miss him, and he won't respond.
12. Your heart is going to break a million times. It's going to feel like the world is falling apart around you. Your lungs will stop working some nights. You find yourself grabbing at your bones trying to hold yourself together. You're going to feel like you're dying. It's going to be okay. You'll find someone else to kiss you goodnight.

For once in my life,
I let someone hold a gun to my head,
I trusted him to not pull the trigger,
Which he didn't,
For a short while,
He didn't commit this on his own,
She placed her hand over his,
She told him things he missed hearing from her lips,
She pulled the trigger for him but left her finger prints out of it,
She used him to get back at me.
Sadly,
She wouldn't need him for anything else,
He didn't know that,
He didn't know that he was just a cover up to get back at me,
He was just finger prints she needed,
He was just lips she tasted,
He was nothing to her,
But that boy was something to me,
Now he's just the guy who pulled the trigger,
And I'm just a person with their brains blown out.

I fell
Into the deepest pits of hell.
I fell
Into depression and being helpless.
I fell
For a boy that had fire in eyes and vanilla on his lips.
I fell
For a common game played by a pathetic man.
I fell
Into sadness and not believing in myself.
I fell
For a girl who's heart beated for me.
I fell
For Hazel eyes and a wide smiled girl.
I fell
Back in love.
I fell
Into happiness and hope.
And forever,
I'll be grateful
That I fell.