time is
smiling
at the thought of you
and my eyes only sting
for a moment

and even if I miss you
I've stopped reminiscing
about
hot summer kisses in the dust
while those feelings
plagued me
with too big and too much
I'm sorry you had me
when I wasn't much

time is
your name
still catches in my throat
but now I know
it was never because
I wasn't enough

this is the third time
I've cried about you

we got lost
we fell in love

you wouldn't wake up
and I got bruised

you jumped ship
but
you're something
I'm not willing to lose

Love stained my soul
like
charcoal
But somehow you
Made it under my skin
I tried to dig you
Out of my veins
I bled out
But you stayed in

you saved
my soul
when my mind
became poison
(I had to start over
when (y)our love
did the same)

it was just march first
you kissed my smile good morning
spring, without warning

healing
growing
bursting
overflowing
expanding
I exist

the person I was
with you
will never exist again
and
I know that
from that
fire in my lungs
and
oh god
it aches
and
I'm okay.
promise,
promise,
promise,
I'm okay.