Tears of sadness dripping out
Cannot control it
My heart is racing out of control
I feel broken beyond compare
I am loosing the fight
I don't know what to do
I'm lost in the dark forest of my mind
No where to run
No where to hide
I feel my heart breaking
No one to save me from this dark obis

Try to talk,
no one hears me.
Getting closer,
does nothing.
Just standing near,
makes me nosey.
Feeling pushed away from everyone and everything.
My confusion sets in.
What did I do wrong?

I'm flooded with emotions. Memories come rushing back, he's found. My heart is racing. I'm so excited! I have his number. Now I'm nervous. What if he doesn't except me. To many years apart. I'm scared, don't know if I should call. Being spontaneous, here goes, I called. He answered. Oh my,  I am so nervous again. I so surprised. He's happy, he has a family. Tears of joy invade my eyes. I'm so happy!

I will always put everyone before myself. Before my feelings, my mindset, my stress levels, and everything else. When our dog died. I put my sadness aside to comfort everyone else. I take my feelings, and bury them deep down inside. I pretend everything is a okay, when it is not. I always feel like an outsider, a nobody, and I start to believe it. I tried to keep to myself so  my stress don't run to other people. I keep everything in a bottle, inside for no one to find.

Standing in the field peppered with golden flowers. I feel you coming close. The warmth of you exceeds me. When you touch me I feel alive. I'm full of energy, and ready to stand taller. You give me strength.