Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
Gigi Tiji Jan 2015
Disconnect
It happened to me
but it's not a part of me
Trigger

I can feel it now
Push it down
down down
down
Guilt

Shut up
You're fine
It wasn't that bad
It doesn't matter anymore
Besides, I loved them
I still love them
It's ****** up
Shame

Shut up
Don't say it
They'll judge you
Others have had it worse anyway
Your story doesn't matter
Shut it away

Back in the closet

Where you grew up
Gigi Tiji Jan 2015
i wake up
i rise up
and i've got some
time to exist
in peace.

before i start noticing

before i start getting caught in the thickets
before i start getting caught in the
thicket thoughts thicket thoughts

I am trying to savor that blurry time
I like walking that blurry line
between sleeping
between leaping
from keep to keep

because life is just one blurry line
between sleeps

a line of salt poured onto a table
dissipating around the edges
you can see the surface
beneath it
it rises up like a mountain range
I am rising out of the ocean like a *******
I am a surface rising out of a sea of salt
I am an ocean rising out of a surface
out of a surface out of a surface
I rise up.
Gigi Tiji Jan 2015
puer
puera puerae
puella puellus
puelli
mani
cured and trimmed
too close almost
cuticle cut
blister sigh
blood blister
blood blossoming beneath
the nail bed
hit it right on
the nailhead
shaved legs,
and a neckbeard.

sledgehammer Sally
sips sweetly from silly
saddle-wearin' thoroughbred
unicorns

I am a fairy faun from
deep inside your frightful
wardrobe roaring lion lyin'
through the skin of my teeth

ice queen itch
I scream for
tag team *****
*** bag drag teen
ditch

pull queen grab
done deal dean
pull mean
and drag me in and
pull me out and
grab a hold and
leg it go and
let's flow and

I'm a ******* princess
gasping
and I'm Prince
Caspian
dead and
drowning between
blurred lines between

between the read the lines blurred

and I'm just trying to reach through

the seemingly subtle spaces
in between rows of words
between letters and faces
but every line and every
curve of the pen is an
iron bar and I'm just
trying to reach through
reach up through
all these symbols
pull myself out of
all these vague
misrepresentations
of understandings and
I accidentally cut myself
on the serrated edges of
the pixelated abstractions
and drip drip

Let's get some coffee.
Gigi Tiji Jan 2015
death is a dissolution of the self into the surround
life is a condensation of the surround into the self

we are dying and living simultaneously
Gigi Tiji Jan 2015
Some may think it strange, but

If you don't let them change,
If you don't give them space, and
If you don't give them room to grow...
then you are stunting them.

You have hurt the very soul
you wished to heal
with your love.

You are putting a flower in a metal cage.
You are keeping a butterfly in a glass jar.

"But they fell in love,
and their love was so great,
that nothing could tear them apart

and they lived happily
ever after,

right?

I could never let them go..."

You can fall in love with a memory.

You can fall in love with a pretty picture.
and you can hold that cold polaroid to your chest
and you can say "I like this best."

but you can't lay your head on its chest,
and you can't feel its heart beating

and you can't exchange a loving glance,
something so beautifully fleeting

and you can't feel its breath on your skin,
because it isn't breathing.

They are not a moment to be stolen.

So come back here to now,
The picture is ever-changing.
pay attention —

Open that metal cage.

Let that flower blossom
for the entire world to see.
Uncap that thick glass jar,
and set that butterfly free.

You may not be with the same person forever,
but realize that they aren't yours to claim...
and they'll never be the same,
ever

So let them have that fresh air to breathe,
and give them space to fly

Let them have all the room to grow,
and you won't have to say good-bye.
Gigi Tiji Jan 2015
the picture isn't
always pretty past
that silly second dimension,

but it's always alive.
So wondrously alive!
Gigi Tiji Jan 2015
love me senseless
Next page