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 Oct 2013 laura
Portland Grace
I wanted you to love me,
so that I could love myself
but that's never the right way
to go about things,
I thought your lips
would wash away my heartache
but now
I am drowning in it.
 Oct 2013 laura
J Hov
Like the cigarette burn on my left forearm
You left a mark
A mark that reminds me
That you were here
Reminds me of a time
When the colors were vibrant with life

These struggles put the strain
Of anxiety on my soul
Lost ever since that mark was seared
Now looking for the light
The love
To remove
The one that left the mark on my heart
The evening chalky light draws stars up in the sky of night,
and I know she will be alright until the morning breaks into her sleep.
She becomes that part of me,that special private privacy that only she and I can see and for me this is my sanctuary,the gates that close behind of me and I see
only her.
 Oct 2013 laura
krista
do not fall for a boy with a pirate heart, even if he will
cross five thousand miles of sand and ocean to be with you,
carrying nothing more than loneliness and longing in his cargo hold.
those things will bond you both together like an oath, but
blood is thicker than water and soon, the promises will weigh you down
like rocks in your pocket, keeping your lungs and heart empty.
he will not stay, something will always call him away in the morning,
even after you've spent the night wrapped in his strong arms,
counting the stars from the undersides of the highest sail.
you will listen to his stories, for they will stretch beyond the decks
of his ship and make you feel both empty and full at once,
but you cannot rely on a tattooed smile to forge you a key to the world.
eventually, he will leave you on stranger shores, soaking and breathless,
wondering when the next tide will bring him close to you again.
but you are not a ***** he found bar-side, never call yourself that.
you must be unpredictable and wild as the sea itself, bottling storms
into your heartbeat and braiding a barrier reef into your hair.
you are calypso, dangerous and beautiful and unyielding,
and if he comes back ten years from now to set foot on the shore,
you will not be waiting. you cannot always be waiting.
he might tell you he loves you. but even then, he is only speaking
about the seventy percent he is familiar with, the part that is pulled into
rises and falls by the moon, a dna sequence patterned by the earth itself.
do not answer him. steal his ship by sunrise instead and plan to follow
the treasure map that you've long since forgotten. never come back.
leave him with a seashell at his side and he will remember at last
that the reason he loved the ocean was because it sounded like you.
// for kd
 Oct 2013 laura
weakeyes
I promise
 Oct 2013 laura
weakeyes
You promised you wouldn't leave
But you never left my life
You just forgot about me
Now I'm forced,
To see you everyday
Know you will never love me ever again
That you won't acknowledge my existed.

I'll just keep sitting here,
Admiring everything about you
Wanting you to come back to me
To just remember
The promise you made to me
That you will always love me.

There's just so many promises,
That spilled out of your mouth
Like they were nothing
Just something to say
To keep me happy
Keep me believing all your lies
And these so called promises
That were never true or to be kept.

Now I realize,
I'm done with all these broken promises.
I should've known
You never meant anything you said
So foolish to even trust you
Let you see the real me,
When I thought I knew
The real you.

So I'll just try my hardest,
To not love you anymore
Be so caught up in your smile
Then broken because I know,
It was not caused by me.
Though this will be tough
I'll keep tying.

I will get over this pain
Of you forgetting me.
I will not want you anymore
Because I can be happy
Without you loving me
And me hopelessly loving you,
I promise you this.
eh ****** but idk.
 Oct 2013 laura
S D S
Eyes don't Lie
 Oct 2013 laura
S D S
I'm attracted to sad eyes
Not sunsets or a pretty dress
The look of pain and loss
But only in the past

Its the empathetic heart I crave
Beating softly in broken cave
Chest bruised from heart-removal
Something close to what I know

There's beauty in symmetry
Particularly when its hidden
A smile at the lovely lips
And a tear in the sad eyes

Another false face, serial lies
Hiding truth of failures scars
A reflection on quality built
I love the look of sad brown eyes
 Oct 2013 laura
Ana Leejay
i know a boy
who sits behind me
always tapping his pen
tapping
and tapping
fingertips spelling

i am anxious

i know a boy
who walks me to class
looks at me before I leave
his foot keeps
tapping
and tapping
and I keep waiting

for him to tell me goodbye
so I can go to class

i know a boy
who cannot stop

like a car alarm on
christmas morning

like police sirens
underwater

a boy
afraid of the pause
the rest, the wait, the halt
the slow motion of eyes meeting,
elbows accidentally touching
words becoming deep breaths,
hesitating instead

I know a boy
who is still a child

and over and over,
i loved him "still"
 Oct 2013 laura
Lizabeth
Fixates me.
 Oct 2013 laura
Lizabeth
I’ve got no right and of that I’m very well aware, that I should have a say in how you wear your hair. That I shouldn’t think it looks the nicest after you’ve showered, when it’s darker and the lines of your combs teeth leave neat rows in your styled way.  

Or maybe that I love you when you’ve shaved, but also grizzly bear you reminds me it’s the weekend. When you're ruff, I know there are a few more precious hours in the Saturday and Sundays on the calendar.

I won’t ever tell you that your grey tee shirt is my favorite of your limited wardrobe, and that you in my favorite color—it’s blue if you  were wondering, though I'm sure you already know— makes my head swoon for a bit. When you wear a button up, and leave it un-tucked, I think about the white vee neck beneath and how I can see it peeking out from beneath your collar.  

I love the way your suit jacket makes you stand up straighter, and how your suit pants when you sit reveal those brown socks you always wear with your wingtips. I even love those blue jeans (I think they’re your only pair) that aren’t stylish, but soft and comfortable. And the brown belt with the cracking leather and brass buckle you always play with when you’re laying on the floor with me, watching nonsense tv at the end of a day. I love your sweatpants, and the way that when you lie on your side, your boxer band shows like a tease. I like the way you never fix it, but it fixates me.
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