We stood on a deserted beach on a freezing January night,
staring at the waves as they ebbed and flowed,
they seemed so infinite,
as if they would never stop their gentle rhythm,

and we -
we…

the skin of our love was cracking violently apart,
as if we had been lying under the sun
with no protection, for years

(maybe we had)

there were no words to soothe the burns,
no actions to undo the damage

we had - split

back into two separate people,
instead of consuming one identity,
and maybe that was best,
because two hearts, two brains, four lungs…
in one entity…
you are sure to burst at the seams…

I ask the moon to light up
your footprints

as if I could follow the trail home
with moonbeam shining on my face

but that great, silver sphere
holds no clues

and stardust can only sustain me
for so long

I eat scraps of midnight
but my hunger for you

burns more fiercely
than the oncoming sun

I am forever treading on the footprints
I have left, on the paths
I have already walked,

leaving breadcrumbs behind me,
as I navigate the impossible forest
of life,

at dusk, my shoes shine like diamonds,
as they retrace every step
that leads me home, and back

to you

We danced in a summer haze
white wine and sweat
seeping from our pores

the fire flies bared witness
to our eyes meeting
for the first time

our hands trembling
as they touched
your fingers brushing
my brushed cotton
dress

sun kissed and
senseless with
longing

desperate to live in the moment
for once
but the thought of a cruel
oncoming autumn

constantly lurking in
the back of our minds

Heartless, they call me,
a silver dagger plunged
and twisted
into a red hot
*****,
knives severing arteries
and veins until I
unravel like dropped
wool,
my blood cells fighting
the infection of close contact
with a society
that would not stand
for me,
heartless isn't born,
it grows in the space
between love and hate,
blooms out of the dark soil
the seeds of shame and blame,
thrives when it's locked away
in a (rib) cage, behind bars
like a circus freak,
sometimes, I long to feel
but then I hear of heartbreak,
heartsickness, and I am glad that mine
does not beat...

If you understand the beauty
of a sunset, then please tell me
how it works
for the flaming oranges and reds
just remind me of the fire I’ve been
running from my whole life

the flames constantly licking my heels
as I try to propel myself
further
faster

I know it will catch me up
one day, and engulf me
in the past I’ve spent
every ounce of energy I have
trying to forget
I know it will burn me
mark me, scar me

but I hope I will douse
the fire down, and walk
free once the pain passes
and maybe then, we can
share the beauty of
a sunset

In candlelight we kiss

two flames meeting

and becoming one

as the wax melts

we wrap ourselves closer together

knowing we have minutes

until our moment ends