You know what scares me most?
The way you can make me fall for you
all over again with that smile.
How you can make me
curse and cry
whenever you hug her, flirt with her when she's just gonna rip you to shreds.

I'm terrified
of losing control,
changing into something unrecognizable.

I'm scared of being alone.

I am frightened that
I'll be addicted to you,
but you're just gonna **** me slowly.
Of caring too much,
hurting myself...

I'm not afraid to be hated,
I'm used to it.
Too all the terrors the world brings,
I'm just not prepared for this thing
we call
love.
It disgusts me,
yet I wish I have it.
How?

I am terrified of going back to how that pain wouldn't leave me two years ago because I have enough burdens left over to carry, and I don't deal with agony very well.

I am terrified of going back to how that numbness wouldn't leave me last year because it's worse even than anguish to be unable to feel, unconvinced you are still alive.

I am terrified of going back to how that happiness wouldn't leave me just over two years ago because as soon as you get up high, the further you have to fall.

My fears are simple...
Not shrewd enough or dextrous
My love divine, yes majestic
My purity maintains as my objective
My faith steady in my beliefs
Striving to be worthy at his throne
Virtuous and righteous I will become
My scars swept away with justice and unity
Victory through Him who has created me
Devotion and warmth to those in need
Repenting of my sin in prayer
Kneeling down with compassion and hunger