When we first met I didn't think much
But with a smile and a touch
I fell head over heals
But now I remember what I want- to make time roll back

On our first date I wasn't really impressed
But you looked really cute in the way that you dressed
I knew you were sweet
But now I remember what I want- to make time roll back

Our first kiss was less than great
But I knew God brought us together by fate
I thanked the stars a thousand times
But now I remember what I want- to make time roll back

That first fight really brought the heat
I thought I'd won; in all honesty I was beat
I couldn't undo this one
But now I remember what I want- to make time roll back

I just need time to clear my head
                                                       So please get out
My life's just been a gloomy wet march day
I trudge through puddles outside my driveway
Little patches of mud accumulate around my lawn
And its freezing
So cold, but not quite cold enough to snow
It sends me chills
And the sun starts to peek out
but its deceiving
Mr. Sun is too shy
He runs back into his cold dark cave
And the day turns again to gray paradise  
Its the most miserable day imaginable
Its March 9th

Why do I do this?
To both you and myself?

Why do I crave your approval?
Why do I need your respect?

Can't I just be strong?
And move on?

Nope. I still need someone to tell me I have potential.
            I still need someone to let me know i'll make it big one day.
            I still need someone to give me that little but of encouragement when I'm too ******* myself.
            I still need someone to sit me down and say, "I believe in you".
            I still need someone to give me advice.
            I still need someone to look up to.
I respect you so much.
We had our differences but all in all, you're still my role model.

But to you, I'm nothing.
Hurtful words roll off your tongue so beautifully.
                     I don't understand!
One day you think I'm amazing
                                                         The next, you're telling me im just mediocre

I may say your words are empty to me
....But I hang on to every last
**Sy-lla-ble

Without you I have no inspiration
You've always been my muse
But I guess without you, I've not much to go on for
You took the most vibrant, lovely pigments
And escorted my brushes to paint the most random of strokes on my enormous white canvas
Movements were rash and irratic but in the end it was the most beautiful thing I've seen
...second most beautiful.
But something had caught my eye
I had seen a work of art like this before
It was too familiar; I'd seen you paint a while ago
I misjudged your manipulation of my hands for guidance
Sadly this was all in your plan
To show me a symbol of your love
When it was much less than tangible

                       But every night, before I fall to sleep, I stare at the beautiful colors you turned my world
                                                           ­  And the light brush strokes are all but a reminder

Tick.    Thud.    Tick.    Thud.
Can the audience hear that?
                                                  The sound of my heart beating syncronously with the metronome
I hope not. Because all I hear is the simultaneous thud/tick of nerves.
                                                                ­                                                              Don­t show your nerves

Can the audience see that?
                                               The sweat that's accumulated on your palms
I hope not. Because all I feel is a cold slimy instrument in you hands. Slipping like butter.

Can the audience feel that?
                                               That frantic look you're giving everyone
I hope not. Because angst and apprehension don't go over well with spectators.

                                                               ­                                                                 ­              Just don't show your nerves.
                                            Relax.
      ­                                                 And take some deep breaths.

Inhale, tick, thud, exhale, tick, thud, inhale, tick, thud, exhale tick, thud
Inhale, tick, exhale, tick, inhale, tick, exhale
Inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale
Inhale, *play

Notes; nice notes nagging at me. nice but not 'nough.
Chords; crystal clear in my ear. Clever but cutting.
Music; my marvelous melody. Each measure brings me muse. Making me move.

Feel        it       running       through      you
With      each      note,      each      rhythm ­     making      you      feel      more                         ­             alive
a          c         c       e      l    e    r   a   n do
Faster!                  Faster!       Faster!  Faster! FasterFasterFaster!
Feel  that?  That's  adrenaline!  That's  mus­ic  running  through  your  veins
Bringing you higher with each step. Breaking free.
                                                                ­
                                                                ­      This is what I live for.
                                                                ­      This one performance.
Everything else is nothing to me
                                                              ­ All my doubts have all                                                              ­    ...vanished
And I realize
All I'm doing is pressing a couple buttons and staring at black dots on paper and a man waving a wand
                                                            ­     But it's beautiful, sweet music.

It's.                                                    ­                                                                 ­                                                         Magic