I use the moon as my guide
A watchful eye over this changing ocean
Keeping the tides on their paths home
Always bringing me back
To where we had to part on these shores.

i look at a reflection

i do not recognize

who are you?

i won’t accept that

thing

as me

i won’t stop until

i am a sliver of what i once was

i am cut into slices like cake

served to

hunger

and control

blasphemous as it seems

i am caught between

who i want to be

and who i need to be

and i can’t tell the difference

i don’t feel the ridges and peaks

and plateaus

i once felt

all that is left are rolling hills

i don’t hear the

delicious pain of

emptiness

i hear the growing want of more more more

i can’t stop until

i feel the peak and

hear the empty hunger

i can’t stop until i am

what i need to be

i can’t stop until

i am a  sliver

and i can’t stop

until i know

who lives

in my

mirror

I can't rewrite the chapters of you
That have already been written,
The ones with torn pages and
And coffee stains and faded ink.
But I can promise to hold the pen
That will write the next few
Chapters, the ones with daisies
Pressed between the pages and
Smiles between every paragraph.

I wasn't prepared for your
kind of love. It made my
hands burn and my teeth
throb and my chest could
never fill all the way with
your smell- like cigarettes
and toothpaste and old
spice- and sometimes I
think I can feel you but
I'm always
      always
      always wrong and it's
never you. And I think
maybe that's okay.

I want to get over
the sound of your
voice on that hilltop-
smooth and quiet
and gliding into my
stomach like the best
ice cream I've ever
had. My heart has
had so much
          t
          r
          o
          u
          b
­          l
          e
finding a hiding
place outside of
your mouth.

As I blew my candles out
I forgot to make a wish
Instead I let my chest tear
Like wrapping paper
And satin ribbons
Tighten at my chest

I watch the window wipers
Chase the raindrops
And realize that no matter
How hard I run
I can’t breathe you back
Into my empty lungs

I close my eyes
There is a ringing inside
My hammering head
My rattling insides
About you that says
I cannot be alone anymore

Login
Log out
Log in again
I log into her profile
And never log out

its nights like these I wish we never met
That we wouldn't have made plans
That I wouldn't have fooled myself into thinking our future was set
The mind might forgive but the heart finds it hard to forget

Prolonged hope
Minor problems magnified through a mental microscope
Spiritual sessions on Sunday with Jewish rabbis
Wrote a broken note to the biship who passed it on to the Pope
If I can find a new spiritual dealer then maybe I can break away from these mad ties
Holding ur hand in China,rainbows at our feet fire flies illuminating the black skies
You were the provider of all my high
The believer of all my lies
N I could never quite stay away from all these thighs
I guess you leaving me never did come as a surprise
Cloud cover,I had to forget about sunny skies

Blue lake of tears
Let it all dry up and call it Salt Lake City
Meet a nice girl in a summer dress give her a rose n tell her she looks pretty
But cheat once she might show mercy do it again and she will show no pity
Advice to your current coz if he aint care full he be floating on this boat with me
Learning from his mistakes,hiding his face everytime he sees me

I can't keep living like this
Life is short, I need to live it in bliss
You with a smile only a dead man can miss
Holding on in the hopes of one last kiss
I need a new addiction,cause stalking you is keeping me from the life that I am missing
Can't let positivity escape my doubt..
No short cuts to happiness gotta take the longer route
I've invested too much
I've had enough
I'm Login out

But for how long
A ***** addiction that is so strong
A longing for love that is so wrong
things to tell at my next therapy session
My reoccuring obsession
.

It's not the painless choice
that I've coached myself to believe it is

But why not, you idiot cynic?

Because I only find happiness
in moments of ignorance

And?

And in those moments of ignorance
I find minutes of shame

And?

And in those minutes of shame
I find hours of sadness

And?!

And in those hours of sadness
I find  endless  defeat




...that's why I sleep life away

Why, you fool?

Because in a lifetime of slumber
one finds nothing at all