can anyone hear me?
i'm screaming, but maybe these pixels aren't loud enough

W H A T    W E N T   W R O N G   W I T H   M E
       MAYBEIAMAPERFECTMISTAKE
ORMAYBEIAMJUSTNOTHING

searching for answers i guess

i hate growing up but i love it too
nothing else feels right
being young is all i know and all i'm comfortable with

it's slowly slipping away from me
i don't know how am i'm going to continue living
should i continue living?

i was surfing reddit and i saw this post on suicide watch - it felt good to know i wasn't the only one who didn't want to exist past 30 . i wonder if they're still alive? the post was 8 years ago

i wonder whether i will be alive - i mean does anyone want to live as a real adult or even be old
i hate it
life looks bleak, predictable, full of effort, monotone, repetitive

don't give me that you choose your life *******

what's wrong with me

looking . i'm always looking for something
always tracing those lines on a chipped mirror, looking for the x that marks the spot

just to feel something
just to feel something
just to feel something

i feel something

do you feel something?
because that feeling left for me as fast as it came
i just can't quite hold on to it

life feels so empty ... nothing feels real
do i even exist? i don't know what to do with myself ...truly i don't

why is everything moving so fast
i just want time to exist and nothing else

Everything that is wrong is just so comforting for me
or maybe it's because that's all i have in my life

i'm so alone - nowhere to go
    no one to go to

no one who understands

just one person, but we don't talk anymore

i'm tired of repeating myself anyways
i can't make sense of my thoughts and emotions these days
   an indescribable feeling, but not the kind you wish for

i'm alone
so alone
i need a friend

i'm so lost