Love *****
I mean I don't even know if this is love
This my problem
I've never been in love
Maybe I have
I don't know
People describe it to me
They say 'trust me you'll know'
But I don't think I will or can ever know
I don't think I'm built to differentiate between real feelings and fake feelings
I don't know what I'm feeling towards you
But I get this sad feeling when we aren't talking
When we aren't with eachother
I guess that's love
Or some twisted version of it
I guess I'll just have to settle for it
And I wish
I just wish
That I could say all of this to you
And more
And I know that life's too short to hold back
But some part of me
The cautious part of me
Tells me to think twice about what I'm doing
If I open up to you, what's the worst that could happen?
But I can never read you
I never know WHAT to think
I never know what you think
I don't want to feel like this
Weak, vulnerable and needy
I don't want to feel like control is not within my reach
Be mine
Forever
But *******
******* for making me feel like this
For hating every moment since you've been in my life
******* for making me feel this way
I'm weak
Pathetic
I thought I was stronger
UGH
I've never been the girl that sat around missing a mans presence
But I guess fate has its own way of getting revenge
Maybe I just feel too much
Or just feel too deep
Or think too much
But I'm so detached at the same time
So distant
So complacent
Maybe that's why I'm so confused
Maybe that's why I'm just not so sure anymore
About anything
About me
About you
And about us
If that even exists
I want to see inside of you
Every last detail
I see something in you
Funny
Because at first I didn't expect it
I thought you were pretty average
It turns out
You're pretty cool
And the best part is
I don't even think you know it
I don't think you can see what I see
But what if it's just me
What if it's my warped vision
Trying to convince us both of a lie
And hating you for telling the truth
First time I saw you
I just knew
I just knew...
I needed you to love me
Word *****. I'm choked up with emotions and no one to talk to...no one that I want to talk to
I don't even think this is what I wanted to say
If you only you could see inside my mind, it's a lot more eloquent