Spotlight is on me.. yet again
I am the main attraction; the one they all came to see
The one they laugh at. The one they joke about
As long as I've remembered, I've always been the "ugly" one, the "awkward" one
A freak
and I'm starting to believe these controversial jokes
I am a clown
and they all seem to laugh at my downfalls
but

**Whoever said I wanted to be in this circus?

I love you more than myself
and you have always
had love
for somebody else

all i want is someone to look at me and accept my scars
too look deep in my soul
and see the pretty that drowns in my fear

i see nothing but wrong in my ways
and i need someone to convince me otherwise
or one day
these scars will re-open and bleed away*

next time i wont drown in my fear
but
*my own rusty blood

There's a war inside my heart,
I can't seem to depart
a dying soldier right from the start

these missles are going off, blowing me apart

The ruins of hurt and anger clouding my sight

running for my life, which way is right,
darkness or light,
give in or fight?

can I survive this destruction
or
should
I
hide away and save my self?

I am not ready.



but in the end I am the soldier

and you are the battle

and I am simply a forgotten casualty
in your
warzone