A city of wild
A city far in miles
A city with style

High sky scrapers
Lush feels and flavors
Treats so sweet to savor

Cultured energy
Strong mentality
High end balancing

Witness the shades of seasons
Fresh air, falling leafs, sun shine teaser
Fairly rain cold winter not freezing

Sandy lands and Mediterranean views
Ancient corners and history of muse
Alexandria my home, my city, my roots.

Because of love...
Cashed all memories
Spent all energy
Broke bread off sanity
Maxed out credibility
Stretched out last nerve
Hustled self out of love
Conserved all the wrong actions
Payed in consequences
Charged up on many accounts

New change is whats left to count up.

Grow, glow, get money and go
a process I am living as I learn
If you feel me then you would know
the bottom is the beginning to the top.
nothing started easy before it got tough, just blind
I am a walking testimonial of my own struggle
Got so comfortable with the same
didn't see outside of the whirlwind
had to stop think and set time to elevate
explore
conquer
and change
change in a way where I never dreamed of
erasing bad habits and learning from mistakes
not transitioning fast enough and that is fine.
I cant say I am not striving to towards it
and most importantly its a transition I gave into and committed to the fullest.

I live in a space between hard and harder.
Harder Shaped my life under shapers of elastic.
Elasticaly snapped back in and out .Boomerang!
Boomeranged after i swung perspectively and precisely
Precisely bounced in my face like attempt never occured.
ReOccurring in my situation i tend to fall back.
back and lost in my own sauce .
Sauce spilled in a carpet room ..where to start.
Start from a different angel or stick to my script.
Scripted in a manaul of life's virtual reality
Reality is fading now falling apart
Apart cant be defined.
Defined as real or fake become the dark truth.
Truth told to many and lied to alot .
Alotted time to make sense of none but un told truth amended into what is real.
Real set back time if not percieved correctly.
Correct settings is what i needed to find,
finding out assuming reality is what set me correctly back.

3:30 AM
tossing, turning, screaming
in my sleep
dreaming of a past life

4:00 AM
eyes open
chest aches
my stomach has turned itself inside out

4:15 AM
make some tea
sit
breathe

4:30 AM
cry uncontrollably

5:00 AM
the tears tell me to start writing again

What have i done
Giving mylove away
For a trail never promised to stay
A heart full of love
Filling with sorrow
I should of thought twice
I am tired of leading with my heart
When it comes to love i am weak
My weakness is i love harder
Harder than i ever thought
Its pure to my wants
I chase what i want
Its him who i want .
Stopp the recklessnes ..your weakness
Weakness spoke upon me and let him take it.
He took it and ran with it
Never looking back
Chasing him was an empty virtue
O was so blind with masked lovely haze
I didnt seeo..i wanted to feel nothing but him
Hypnotized by what ..i had no meaning to
This love had no meaning
Its takes two to make it historic
I left in your hands as if i cant conquer on my own.
Trial mistaken.

Dont throw your self on him. .
dont expect nothing...
its chess not checkers..
5 steps ahead.
So his action won't matter.
Make me see it different.
I wont look at him as a rude seed.
That blindingly deferred attention away.
To make up for the old sweet love of cheat.