Gently I pick up the packet.
Put a cigarette between my cracked lips.
Fire.
Start to inhale.
I feel how the air is ****** out of my pure
lungs to suddenly be replaced with new filthy air.
I rapidly feel how the nicotine fill my brain and then
seeps out into the bloodstream and slowly assumes my veins.
Like a drug or like falling in love.
First everything at once, then slowly.
Breathing the smoke in to keep living but it slowly ends my life,
and it will hurt, hurt like hell.

I can't get rid of the thought about your
***** hands touching all over my pale body.
Ripping me apart on the inside with your bare hands.
Touch my soul.
Destroy my soul.
Do it to me, just do i fast.

Wherever I go, I look around me.
Imagine me that your there.
Watching me.
Waiting for me.
You visit and haunts me in my dreams.

I feel trapped in my own body, feel like i'm serving a life sentence.

Sleepless nights surrounded by anxiety in an unbreakable circle.

My body is always filled with pain and
my head will never rest from my thoughts.

There's just no rest for the broken souls.