And when you said you loved me
I felt a rush of adrenaline
coursing through
my black & blue veins
those words struck me
like lightening
I've never felt so
dead and alive
at the same
time

The sound of your voice is baby blue
and your laugh is all kinds of yellow
Your smile is aquamarine
and your eyes are every shade of brown
You smell like magenta when you are close  
you are every color
that i think of
when I am
color blind

trust in no one
once they learn the deepest parts
of yourself
they will know you
betray you
hurt you
never give someone that part of yourself
it is your to keep
not theirs to destroy.

you left me feeling worthless, like I wasn't enough
the problem was
I was so enough
you weren't able to carry it

stay.
let's watch the stars
give our bodies to the sky.
move our souls with the wind.
let go.
leave the broken
let's give our pain to the trees
so it can be hung on branches
while we watch the stars
so we can remember
what broke us
when we thought
we would be up
with the
stars.

Would it be okay if I were to tell you
that I was falling in love with you
Would it be okay if I carved your name
onto oak trees that fill the air with love
Would it be okay if I wrote endless love letters
that never reached your sight
Would it be okay?

you pinned my legs onto the ground
and demanded that I stand

Remember the past when you thought
you wouldn't make it to the future ?

Remember those memories that
you thought were just dreams ?

Remember the feeling of death when
you thought you were losing your life ?

Remember seeing hell at every corner when
you thought you wouldn't make it to heaven ?

live to remember
that you are stronger than ever

I have the planets tied onto threads
that hang low onto my fingertips
I will lasso the sun and hide it away
so you won't have to see the light in her eyes anymore

I took every star I could get a hold of
& created my own constellation of love
when the sun was about to set
I grabbed the moon to summon your light

you look into her eyes with such desire
my shooting stars are as bright as hers
I promise if only you would just look
my mind isn't your earth to live on, please leave

I hope one day I could stop
staring at the stars in your eyes
to look away, to finally look up
& see the whole universe beyond my sight

but like the ocean waves
you filled my lungs
with toxic lies
you are the ocean salts
inside the wounds of
my heart.

summer time
I vividly remember from being a child
the front door wide open, I felt the heat of concrete
strike my tiny feet and the cracks where fire ants gushed out like a nasty wound only to attack my soft flesh
I remember the feeling of the sun, so bright, so radiant.
How it would make my skin glow and burn
I remember my body draped in warm air
and how my skin was wrapped with gusts of gentle winds
with flowers blooming through my veins
summer time
I only live to remember those memories
that meant the most to me
because now,
the sun does not touch my skin.
I do not get a glimpse of the bright beauty
I am draped in my covers and sheets
my skin is wrapped in thick black
and weeds are growing through my veins
because now,
every season feels so dull, so bland
summer is no longer summer
summer is what I've turned summer into
every season is numb and emptiness
summer is no longer warm enough to thaw my heart
winter, spring, summer, fall.
they are no longer seasons but words,
to claim what one is feeling
Emptiness is my summer
my winter
my spring
and my
fall.

My love for poetry started with pen and paper
and the thought of you

When you saw me cry
did you want to stuff
sand in my eyes
to stop the flood
When I found out
did you want to
smother me in honey
to make life sweet
again
probably not.

If I could tell you all that
you bring into my mind

I would say

You can put out fires
with your ocean eyes.
You can outshine the sun
with your radiant smile.
Your laugh can instantly become
the soundtrack of my life.
You have me behind your back
following the scent of milk & honey.
You are the art i've hung on my wall
and stood staring for hours
You make me want to stuff sand
in your eyes to stop the flood
Your name reaches my grasp in the
endless love poems written for you
You make up every star that creates
the constellation of love I have for you

If I could tell you all that
you bring into my mind