and when I die
compose a symphony in my voice
transfer my soul into a violin string
and my heart into a timpani drum
as long as I can be heard I will never be
truly
gone
you told me once you would name a gun after me
if you stumbled across one that spoke in my voice
and if you can hear my name in a gun shot
you can find it again in a broken chord on a piano
because
I used to be a composer
but every melody was about you
people rest in sound waves
and it's time I was found again
just like I found you

and when I die
bury me in sheet music
and leave me under the concert hall
so that I will never go without
music reverberating through my bones
I've been told my eyes are gold
if you look at them in the right light
but if you gave me room to breathe again
they might become the color of the land
I am rushing over
in bass line
one that you created
with your own two hands

and when I die
and you hear what you have created for the first time
I hope you fall to your knees
in a spotlight
on the stage you stand
because you have just realized
that I am more alive now
than I was when I was breathing

and when I die
I will not really be dead

now will I?

I see you see me through the seams and beams of time and space
Long-Haired tall pale one
I acknowledge your efforts to communicate with me telepathically
Telling me about a world within a world
that on this Earth there is a space
which is a haven for light beings and truth seekers
in this world threaded with beams and bolts
where evil is spread like chewing gum
where man is turned into sheep through dumbing ***

I see you sitting on a cliff
in a world stars and skies away from ours
I heard you say that buildings would fall
I heard you say that beings from under would stand out
I see your hope for the human race
and if the Divine still believes in us we have a place

But this is a fight that must be fought with spirit
Weapons are merely instruments to destroy figments of chaos
the true instruments are in the heavenly basement
where worlds were dreamed
and it started with a band you see
big bang the ****** void opening
polarization with a band member rebelling
and a universal game created
and galaxies were governed
councils were formed and there were uniforms
hybrids created to mediate
across the planes, planets colonized
some beings unevolved and lost destroy, others preach the Law Of One Rise
******* or star dust
an interaction of fusion far beyond our understanding
it was music that began it all
harps and all strings, the rainbow piano
it started with a band and science calls it a bang
but merely a ****** as worlds are created within the creation continuum

and the greatest message from the long haired tall one: "Speak the truth, find your whole, defend the music for for your race it is home".

my heart is my front door
and she is the curious fly

I see her out of the corner of my eye
as she flies about
she explores me from top to bottom
and I don't mind having her around
she can stay as long as she wants
as long as she doesn't make a sound
it's nice having company in this house

I was alone for quite some time
took a vacation to find myself
I traveled through my mind
turning the ugly things into beautiful seashells
the salty air may dry my skin, but I love how it smells

I woke one morning
to the sound of buzzing
I grew to hate the sound
but now
it seems lovely and sweet
I let the vibration rock me back to sleep

sitting in a rocking chair
I watch as she soars past me
following her with my eyes
she flies in patterns I've never seen
making me dizzy
the head rush becomes addicting

she flew out through my open door
the same way she came in
swift, and curious
she viewed the outside
the way she viewed me
an adventure
nothing to be sure of

it's been months
I haven't seen her since
but I can still hear the buzzing
It gives me headaches
but I still leave my door open
even though I know she isn't coming

Solitude is addicting
As my head grows restless
And my thoughts take over
Washing down like a waterfall
But at the bottom
There is no oasis
Just rapids

Madness is inviting
As my thoughts bounce around my head
Like a tennis ball at Wimbledon
Knocked back and forth, searching for a victor.
Like 100 tiny voices fighting to be heard in an endless echo
It's like fighting for calm
In the middle of an endless ocean,
Struggling in the midst and mist of a hurricane
I'm thrown from the sanctuary of my boat
And plunge into the murky waters of insecurity
Drowning in sorrow, mistrust and anxiety.
I sense a calm and open my eyes
Just to be hit with another wave and pulled back under
Deeper than before.