I think you're the sea.
Your blue plaid shirt the waters and
My red plaid jacket the sunset,
Our hands are oars,
Yours tracing my fingertips-
My skin-
Arms, legs, and stomach,
Sending shivers down my spine,
Exploring my body like a ship
Sailing out into the horizon.

I hear your heart,
It beats in time with the tide,
Your breath a sweet ocean breeze
As it tousles my hair,
And I'm hyper aware of how
Deep your eyes are.
Not blue,
But brown like the ground of
The earth underneath the water.

Our kisses are dives,
Striving to reach the
Sunken treasure at the bottom
Of your ocean,
Of my ocean,
The pieces are scattered but
We'll find them and
Piece it back together.
Our hands intertwine to
Lock the chest but
I find I drown in your stare

Because seas are violent.
I'd forgotten that, but the thought
Seizes my mind as your waters
Grip my throat and I
Gasp for air but I find I can't
See anymore.

Your hands are cold against my body,
Like the tide of your heart casting me out
Onto the shore,
Naked and sure of indifference
Your breath a typhoon of ice
Hurled perfectly at my chest-
You used this sunset and
Left a storm in my eyes.
Painted a picture of sincerity but
Blue is the color of clarity and
Mine won't forget your
Murderous waves or
Mischievous ways and

Through you I've come to know
Some people aren't that lucky-
We cry alone.
Throw a rock, aim right at our chest,
Our hearts are stone.
We suffer in silence. And
If I could catch all the tears I've cried in a pitcher,
I would rain them down,
Drown a river in my sorrow.
Drown my sorrow in a river?
What's the difference? Life is only borrowed, anyways.

I met a girl with fire on her head and in her heart,
Her arms were lined perfectly with the reaper's scythe.
She was beautiful, but she didn't know it.
And isn't that the story,
A sad, beautiful little thing saved by a shining knight,
Because no one cares unless you're beautiful or dying.
I am neither.
So where do I belong?
A young woman, never graced by lips in pure adoration,
The last time I was kissed was
Only because he wanted me to **** his **** and
Even then I was only a rebound because
I am never first.
First? No-
I'm that weird girl at a frat party with
A beer in her hand and nobody to dance with,
No one to make out with unless the guy who asked
Was already rejected by everybody else.
I'm that awkward friend who always
Stands off a little to the side because
I never know what to say.

When I was a little girl, I wrote a poem.
I called it second best, because
I knew my parents' pride wasn't me.
How could it be, standing in the shadow of a
Prom king, football playing, religious, outgoing,
Straight-A, straight-laced son?
I mean, sure, they loved me but
What is love, really?
Can't anyone tell me? Because I'm sitting inside this
Bricked up wall, Invisible to the passerby,
They pass on by, pass me by, can't they see me cry?
No, this wall is too **** high-
Just like the last guy.
And so, I was dead before I was born.
What a cold heart, I'm never warm.
I found the world, but it was broken.
I found love, but it was wasted
Like the last man I tasted.

So, tonight I'm writing a poem
And I'm calling it second best because that?
Is what I am.

If this is a game,
I can't win it
Count me out,
Take the cards
If this is a race,
I won't finish
Turn around,
this has gone too far

I think I know when enough is enough
I think I've had just enough

I can see it now, I was in 4th grade and we were all saying the pledge of allegiance with our hands over our hearts. "One nation, under God, indivisible with liberty and justice for all." I always thought it was "invisible". One nation, under God, invisible. It suddenly turned our nation into a superhero with the sickest super power ever, invisibility. Our nation was leaping over buildings and fighting crime in the moonlight with a bad *** sidekick named God.
One nation, under God, invisible. That's what i have become to this sidekick, invisible. I subsequently have fallen victim to the rare oddity that is my brain and finally realized that God doesn't even know who i am. Suddenly, this nation was not jumping over tall buildings, it was blocking the sunlight and causing an eclipse.
One nation, under God, invisible. I am invisible in this darkness of the night. But i searched for the moon relentlessly, knowing that it was my only chance of finding my way out of here. And once i found it, i held it in my arms, cradled it like a sleeping baby and careful not to wake it up because once it awakens it must escape to the sky and will no longer be mine. But to no avail, the moon was awake and whispered to me, "Dear child, did you really think you could escape God?"

i know it's hard
to wake up
to open your eyes
to not roll over and
cry yourself back to
dreams you never want to-
you never want to
open your eyes again

i know it's hard
to put on your shoes
to pull on your pants
to hide the marks you
thought you deserved
you never want to
hurt again

i know it's hard
to step outside
to feel the chill of
the winter wind
to feel the chill of
people's words
you never want to
listen again

when your bed was
your only friend
and you shared it with
tears and had parties
alongside razors and
heart breaks and
no comfort

when the parties ended
just before you would have
got the door
broken in

when life gets hard
your tears are your friends
and that's okay
you're okay
the razors are only
just as cold
as the rest of the world

sleep for awhile as
the world will soon realize
you are only a
blossoming beautiful
flower

Am I in love? I like to think I am.
Otherwise I wouldn't know
How to categorize these feelings I'm having.
Just the thought of his smile, his eyes, his voice
Brings an overwhelming happiness --
One I have no choice
But to embrace gratefully
Seeing as it saved me, obviously,
From a fate much worse.

Being alone -scratch that -
At having never known
You, I wouldn't know it,
But it would drive me insane.
And insanity isn't a game
I take too kindly to playing.
Bottom line, all I'm saying
Is that you make my life better
By simply existing
By filling up that empty space
I never knew was missing.

*I love you

You leave fallout whenever you walk away from me.
Oh, god, I can't breathe when I see your face.
Everything in me just stops,
Like someone hit pause,
And then it's like I'm falling through the floor.
I never knew a person could make you this crazy.
I never knew it could be such chaos inside,
Like a star dying,
Little parts of me spinning out,
Fire and light and everything quaking.
I want to reach out and steady myself
Just to touch something solid, to know that gravity still exists
And you're not the only thing that's pulling on me.
My poor heart is trying to keep up
With my blood going the speed of light through my veins,
And it flounders, it stutters and trips and trembles.
Nobody's ever had this kind of effect on me.
I could crumble to your feet whenever I see you.
And for hours after, the fallout keeps coming,
And I lay in the dark in the early morning
Trying and failing to sleep
Because inside I am a whirring jumble of feelings
And the light from the turmoil inside shudders its way out of me
In tears.

He opens his Star Wars: A New Hope lunch box
Inside a hippies dream.
**** in baggies that have the superman symbol
And Batman symbol on them
Tabs of LSD
And molly.
Hunter S. Thompson would have a field day

©Gambit '13